Sam Temple will be the first to admit his performance was well below what was expected of him in the men's Olympic moguls.
But the 30-year-old from Oxford was hiding an inner turmoil.
His brother William was killed in a car crash in Val d'Isere, in France, in December.
Temple took a week off after the tragedy but has since been back in training for what was his second Winter Olympics.
"At the end of it all there are bigger things in life than sport"
He told BBC Sport Online: "I find it hard to talk about it. I took a week off but I have not been able to grieve properly yet."
Temple finished 29th of the 30 starters and failed to qualify for the final.
He made a mistake early on and then had to stop and climb back up the moguls to reposition himself for his second jump.
He said: "I lost my concentration early on.
"I made a big mistake in the third or fourth turn which I hadn't made in training. I completely lost the plot.
"But at the end of it all there are bigger things in life than sport."
Temple was not the only skier who struggled.
America's Jeremy Bloom, the World Cup leader, and Japan's Teppei Noda made serious mistakes.
Temple added: "Normally the guys up their performances in the big competitions but there were a few who messed up.
"But that doesn't make me feel any better about my own run."