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Wednesday, 19 June, 2002, 11:32 GMT 12:32 UK
America and soccer
USA fans celebrate the win over Mexico
On Tuesday BBC Sport Online published a light-hearted look at how an American sportswriter might view the USA's World Cup success.

This is what you thought (and by the way - we were only joking).


This debate is now closed - A selection of your e-mails appear below.


Having lived in the UK for the past five years I see where you're going with this. I hear this kind of hilarious material on a daily basis. It's really creative stuff. Can you do a series next week on why the Yanks call it the World Series if nobody else plays in it?
Michael, USA

It was a nice try, but next time at least read a couple US papers or something to try get a feel. Sheesh! This was so bad it wasn't even insulting!
Patrick, USA

Absolutely awful, yes we use different vocabulary here but most writers have at least graduated high school. Most people I know who speak English as a second language write better than the author of your parody. I have a sense of humour, but your parody was just outright stupid.
Jon, USA

Umm....right. It's supposed to be funny is it? I didn't get a word of it.
Wade, US

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Granted, it's not a gut-buster, but it's worth a chuckle and hardly something to take offence at
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Brandon, USA
The Brits are great comedians. The Americans are great comedians. Not everyone understands British humour. Not Everyone gets American humor.

England did well at the World Cup. The US did well at the World Cup. The article was well intentioned, but poorly executed.

Americans care about what the British think, that's why sometimes we get sensitive about these things. Americans don't give a toss what the 'rest of Europe' thinks.
Craig, United States of America

Chris, US of A. Thank you for showing some of your more sensitive compatriots how to respond to light-hearted sarcasm.
Scott, England

At the start of the match I am sure you would say, "Well, they're big, they're tough, and these guys don't like one another Chuck". At the end of the match, surely something like, "We've played one eighty seconds of real time additional clockage now, the ref looks at his watch and blows for closure"
Pete Hoyle, Scotland

Dudes, like if the crew back home can't dig no parody, then yo yo yo, they're just a bunch of prudes.
Frank Lee, USA

Granted, it's not a gut-buster, but it's worth a chuckle and hardly something to take offence at. What's wrong with a little light-hearted creativity?
Brandon, USA

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I was so annoyed after reading this that my scorebag nearly exploded
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Chris, US of A
Okay, it was funny. Can we stop the discussion now so I can get back with my uncultured "mates" and ignorantly start putting movies in your theatres, music on your radios, computers on your desks, protecting your borders, and generally ruling the world?
Lieuallen, USA

I was so annoyed after reading this that my scorebag nearly exploded. IF I owned a passport, and IF I could find this "England" place on a map, I'd drive over to your capital city, Dublin, and kick this sportswriter's lily-white ass. Luckily for him, my duties as White House Foreign Policy Advisor prevent me from making the drive over there. GO USA! Watch out World, the US is going to win next year's World Cup of Soccer tournament!
Chris, US of A

I didn't find it funny at all. The USA is a different country. People over there don't say the same things as we do - they say things like 'vacation' and 'sidewalk'. Why should we expect them to use the same vocabulary for football/soccer? So what if they call it 'soccer'? - Italians call it 'calcio' which has nothing to do with 'foot' or 'ball', but nobody sneers at them for it.
Graham, England

I really, really tried to be angry with it after reading all the comments, but the fact is I couldn't. Why? The reason is that real football fans in America generally don't read articles about football written by born and bred American writers.

They'll read articles by Brit expats like Grahame L. Jones of the Los Angeles Times, or (God forbid) they'll go online and read the online version of the BBC. The article was fine. The humour was fine. The fact is that if you are an American and you want to read good football writing, you HAVE to go to a newspaper outside the United States.

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This piece simply wasn't funny by any measure
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Patrick, USA
You were born and raised in France and you love baseball? So the quality of your local paper about baseball isn't up to your standards? You go to an AMERICAN baseball sports site. There's no shame in that. Who knows?

Maybe one day the BBC will be writing articles about all the years England and the rest of world laughed at the United States because they could never understand "the beautiful game". Of course, that article will come the day after we win the Cup. Great article, BBC. No problems over here.
Eric, USA

Writers, like players, work under time pressure. And like players, they get paid and should be judged on their results. This piece simply wasn't funny by any measure.

During a match, shots go over the goal into the crowd. Whether the shot was well-placed or well-intentioned doesn't matter. A miss is a miss. Let's find something more relevant to discuss.
Patrick, USA

I admit that we American's are naive... but not ignorant. After all, it is not our fault that American culture has reached to all corners of the globe and that no other nation has done the same in the US. In America, we are not able to see Britain's "proper" sportscasters like you are able to see Chris Berman on ESPN. If I was able to get a taste of Australian television, I am sure I could find some cultural differences that may seem amusing to me. Can't we all just get along?
Tim, USA

Jolly good and very spiffing!
Mark Kent,England

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Put the boot on the other foot and see how well Gary Lineker does at reviewing a Baseball or NFL match!
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Gavin, Scotland

Why does it mean so much to people in other countries what we in the USA think of soccer? What's it to you? I mean, I sure don't care what you think of baseball and football....
Tom, USA

Man, such hostility from all sides! The reason us Americans don't get it is because it reads like British English translated by the British into American English. It's not that we can't laugh. ... We just don't get it. Translation please?
Ann, USA

This is exactly why I read your sports section instead of American ones. Loved it!
David, USA

Very funny spoof of US sports commentating, and we should take it in the superb spirit it was intended - i.e. positive light-hearted humour, and not mean-spirited at all.
Mike Olsen, USA

Put the boot on the other foot and see how well Gary Lineker does at reviewing a Baseball or NFL match!
Gavin, Scotland

Hey, there's nothing wrong with this. Brits are cool and we Yanks do need to keep our sense of humour. This was light entertainment.
William, USA

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US sports writers and commentators revel in their ignorance and dislike of the single most popular sport on the planet
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Kevin Kidd, Boston, USA
I read the article - it seems fairly innocuous. I can't really see why so many Americans have reacted in such a negative way. Perhaps the article pointed out some truth and touched a raw nerve!
Dave, UK

You guys got it right! Aside from a few soccer (sorry, football) specific publications in this country, the sparse coverage of the Cup has truly been about as idiotic and uninformed as your spoof. US sports writers and commentators revel in their ignorance and dislike of the single most popular sport on the planet. It's embarrassing.
Kevin Kidd, Boston, USA

Does the writer of this article work part-time as a speech writer for George W. Bush? This would never see print in any major US newspaper, but it does capture the general attitude of the US towards football/soccer.
Gene, Ohio, USA

Am I the only American who can enjoy a good laugh at her country's expense? God knows we have a laugh at other countries so perhaps we should stop being hypocritical and take this good-natured ribbing in stride? This Texan can certainly dish it out, but she can take it too.
Robin, USA

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I did not find it very funny. I love British comedy, but this was over the top
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Stephen, USA

Quite a hilarious article! Was a great read and a good laugh. Not quite totally American dude, but a top class attempt! Cheers to you... Cheers to the US for showing we are starting to play a good brand of footie/soccer and hopefully this will be the launch pad for the start of something special.
Mike L, USA but living in England

The article was hilarious, but not a patch on the comments from our over-inflated friends. When an American can, intentionally, make me smile (let alone laugh), I'll accept their comments about our humour. As we have to put up with their cheerless pop culture, I'm sure they can put up with our harmless version of 'friendly-fire'.
David, England

I did not find it very funny. I love British comedy, but this was over the top. If the writer had not gone to such an extreme it would have been extremely funny. The English are best when making fun of themselves. The same is true for Americans. Unfortunately, neither does a very good job of making fun of the other.
Stephen, USA

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Please excuse my fellow serious Americans without a sense of humour
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Brian, USA
The article was slightly amusing, but ultimately boring. The worst of the US media is an easy target to poke fun at. I guess the English are just lucky that there's nothing like that in English journalism!I certainly do agree that the US commentators on ESPN tend to be idiots. A goal kick referred to as a "clearance".
Bruce Sears, USA

Please excuse my fellow serious Americans without a sense of humour. Well done USA. Not only did the US team open the eyes of many Americans to the joy of World Cup football, their success helped some kids with their geography studies.
Brian, USA

I thought this was more National Lampoon than Monty Python.Apart from a couple of newly-introduced words like 'scorebag' and 'goalbag' this is nothing more than an exaggerated version of what I hear on ESPN all the time. Probably more like the TV commentator's version than the normally more eloquent Press types (well, they have an editor don't they).

Funny; and the responses are even better! Is it still true that less than 20% of Americans have a passport? Probably for the best!
Rob Behennah, Singapore

Randy - are you for real? This article is completely harmless and very amusing. Your comments are not.
Jim, England

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Interesting that everyone other than US nationals who have written comments here find it highly amusing!!
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Neil, UK
Oh yeah, American soccer is real up and coming! The reason they've got so far is that it's very easy for a clumsy team, who are all arms and elbows, to make a very skilful side like Mexico play to the same shoddy standard they do.
Dave Smith, England

The article is hilarious and I agree that British people are laughing at you because you take it seriously. And after all I'm pretty sure that nine out of 10 American sportswriters don't even know what the offside rule is.
Tomi Romppainen, Finland

Interesting that everyone other than US nationals who have written comments here find it highly amusing!!
Neil, UK

Long fly drive to centre field and Team Engerland win with a one nothing finish as the siren brings the third period to a close. What a game for net-minder Dave Seaman. Man of the match must go to point guard Mikey Owen. Great work in the key.
Stat Boy, England

It will be a total embarrassment to me if the USA progress further than England in a World Cup Finals. It would be like Chelmsford winning the Super Bowl...
Ching, London, England

Well done the BBC, you seem to have reached deep into the endzone and look sure fire to convert with maximum yardage gained with this item.

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Long fly drive to centre field and Team Engerland win with a one nothing finish as the siren brings the third period to a close
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Stat Boy, England

With regard to American fury at this light-hearted document, stop changing the football vocabulary, only then will you gain some respect from the footballing world.
Oli Pavitt, UK

This is a piece that perfectly reflects the perception of American sports commentators, not just in the eyes of the Poms but also the Aussies and the Kiwis. I doubt there was any intention for it to be funny for you guys at all!
Geoff, Australia

Considering the pitiful portrayal of British culture and accents in any number of Hollywood films, our US supporters have got off lightly.
Torrent,England

Decent effort at humour I guess, even for a Brit. Though I considered it mildly amusing at best, in spite of the effort, I have to say it's funnier than Mr. Bean.
Rick, US

I'm a Finn who has lived in America (5 years) and England (2 years) and here is the verdict:

You guys both produce some hilarious comedy with people like Dennis Miller and Al Maher in America and shows like "Big Train" and "Banzai" in England, but the English are funnier. Plus the British are able to laugh and poke fun at themselves and the Americans aren't. Who's got the inferiority complex ?
Samuel Ruohomäki,Finland

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Though I considered it mildly amusing at best, in spite of the effort, I have to say it's funnier than Mr. Bean
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Rick,US

Yes this article might of been a little exaggerated, but hey, can you guy's not have a little laugh!

Oh by the way when are the Cubans and Japanese going to be invited to the 'World Series' of baseball? Have a nice day!
Steve Byrne, Liverpool, England

That article was about the stupidest attempt at an impersonation that I have ever read. It was incomprehensible. It read more like a non-English speaker's attempt at writing a sports article than a sarcastic look at American sports terminology.
Bryan,Japan

Everyone getting offended and taking the article too seriously proves how good it is!
Bov, England

This article was way off-base - translation? No resemblance to Americana. Live here for a while - and then try to imitate the natives.
Paul Mathew, USA/India

I can't believe that you missed that Bruce Arena now becomes the 'winningest' coach in US World Cup history
Marc, Australia

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That article was about the stupidest attempt at an impersonation that I have ever read
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Bryan, Japan

For the record, we regard this as a girl's game, cherished by countries that have basket case economies, lose world wars or need our help winning them. We can take a joke - we can even play one.
Michael,USA

Guess what? Some Americans can laugh at themselves. Some can't. I'm guessing that's pretty much true everywhere, even Canada.
Ken, USA

It just wasn't funny but at least they got the spelling of defense right.
Karen, USA

I didn't read the article but I can say that after each US win there have been plenty of US bashing articles in all the papers, negative comments by the announcers on both BBC and ITV, and rude digs by my colleagues and friends about the US team.

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I am weary of the American bashing. Go Brazil
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KP,American in UK

Why can no one in the UK say a nice thing about the US team or Americans? Give them the respect they deserve people they have made it to the final eight - just like yourselves in much more difficult circumstances because the whole world seems to be bashing this team.

Why must so many of you act like you are better than all Americans in every way? I've been here five years now and I am still waiting for a day to go by without an American bashing. Repeat - I didn't see this particular article and don't really want/need to. I've got a great sense of humour and 'get British jokes' but I am weary of the American bashing. Go Brazil.
KP,American in UK

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Hilarious article, but what's more hilarious is the way the Americans reacted to it. It was just a joke!
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Karl, NZ
If the Americans could play half as "big" as they talk, they'd surely have been odds-on favourites from the outset. Their reporting clearly underlines the reasons Europeans (and indeed most of the world) have no interest whatsoever in American sports such as baseball and American football. Utter drivel.
Steve Porter, England

Dearie me. I really hate to think what would have happened had the BBC put the word 'Football' in the article instead of 'Soccer'. But, I'm never surprised at how the words 'US', 'Culture', 'inferior', 'poke fun', 'don't understand' and 'irony' always seem to go together.
Dom, UK

You have to hand it to the Americans. They're the only country in the world that could make me want the Germans to win a football match!!
Mark Shanks, England

Oh dear!The over-reaction of many US (not American - America is a continent, not a nation) citizens speaks volumes.

Insecure, arrogant, humourless and just a little slow-witted?

Nine out of 10 for football, one out of 10 for humour

Must try harder.
Steve, England

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I think your satire received such a response because you unwittingly touched a raw nerve in the American psyche.
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Andrew Smith, United States
Hilarious article, but what's more hilarious is the way the American's reacted to it. It was just a joke. And for those who were wondering, it wasn't supposed to be an exact copy of one of your articles, it was an exaggeration, can you not see that??

You need to broaden your horizons a little and try not to see things in black and white so much. And by the way you will never take the game away from any of the great footballing nations because none of you understand the game and what it's all about. come on now, take your pills.
Karl, NZ

What a waste of paper and bandwidth. If the "writer" wanted to pluck American sports slang and arbitrarily insert it in an article he could have at least chose something more interesting. English humour is like English food: over cooked and made from dubious ingredients.
Robert, USA

It obviously hit the mark - unfortunately many Americans cannot see the funny side of anything that is directed at them, or appreciate that there are other ways of seeing things.

The comment from Brian "I just can't understand it" makes that abundantly clear - excellent BBC tongue in cheek stuff. Upon pondering the responses from the US it is slightly disturbing how aggressive and hostile some are - this does not just apply to sport.
Iain, Australia

I think your satire received such a response because you unwittingly touched a raw nerve in the American psyche. We are aware that many in Europe see us as a nation of moronic, half-civilized simpletons and this bigotry is growing (perhaps this has something to do with our current president). Before you accuse us of being humourless, ask yourself, do black people laugh at racist jokes?
Andrew Smith, United States

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Parody. Look it up America.
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V,Hong Kong
I am a Brit living in Chicago. The last couple of weeks I have been watching the games on the Mexican channel. I love it! but have no idea what these guys are saying. I have also discovered that England play far better when the commentary is in Spanish.

My suggestion is forget making fun of US commentators, stop being so stuck-up in England about "our beautiful game"- the British approach to football is mob like, violent and racist anyhow -face it and all Americans need to lighten up and get a sense of humour.

So Friday morning its channel 3 and Univison for meOwen....Goooool!
MidwestBrit,UKUSA

Parody. Look it up America.
V,Hong Kong

Where did this come from? It reads like it was fed through a computer program. "Card Red ejection"? Most American sports journalists would just have said "ejection". And Team States just doesn't happen, neither does Mex.

If you really wanted to sound "American", you would say, fullback instead of defender, halfback instead of midfielder, and forward instead of striker.Frankly I'm appalled at how poorly this article was written, and wouldn't have passed any self-respecting sports editor. (Yes, we do have them.)
William Hill, USA

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The last paragraph says it all... the World Cup must be based on something the USA started!
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Mark Dawson,Vancouver, Canada
Not bad. I was quite amused by the description of Germany as "spunky" (that's got to be a first). Unfortunately, I still don't understand the rules to cricket - that was the sport you were covering, right?
Tom, USA

I hope the pressure of winning a world championship actually involving other nations is not getting to our American friends!
David Betts, England

The last paragraph says it all... the World Cup MUST be based on something the USA started!
Mark Dawson,Vancouver, Canada

Huh?
Judy Holden,USA

It seems Europeans will never let down a chance to insult the USA in the one area it thinks it still can: soccer. I would expect it from some 16 year old kid on AOL, but not a writer for the BBC.
Adam Ruddermann, Connecticut, USA

Very funny! As a Brit living in USA I find this extremely close to the hype and salesmanship that goes into sports coverage over here. Good one! Or as we say in the UK - "jolly good!"
Andrew Gonoude, USA

Often a spoof is the highest form of respect.
Felicia,Singapore

Ha ha ha! This is a pretty damn good representation of a football (or soccer as they like to call it here) report. Good job.
Joseph John, USA

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Lighten up folks, it's a joke
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Jack, USA

Brilliant. I have been to the US and found the style very like the LA newspapers. And of course most of the time, if it has not happened in the States, it hasn't happened.
Dick Hutchinson,Australia

I must admit I am a little embarrassed by the insecurities of some of my local countrymen. Lighten up folks, it's a joke. The sad part is that it isn't very far off the mark. Unfortunately it's not just an American problem, exaggerating stories to grab the readers attention appears to be universal. Read the headline stories on the front page off the London daily papers lately?
Jack, USA

Now you Brits have done it! We are taking our kicking ball and going home to tell mommie.
Nathan Hattan,USA

England and much of the world simply can't figure out why the US doesn't share an obsession with the simple game of soccer. I played soccer enthusiastically for six years in my childhood but then moved onto more challenging and sophisticated sports.

Take a look at soccer and where it is popular. With the exception of England, soccer is only really a significant force in countries that have been unable to develop their own sporting traditions. Unable to develop their own sports to a significant level, they rushed to adopt the simplest import they could find. Soccer is truly a game that the simplest, least refined person can grasp.

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American football and baseball are too intellectual and sophisticated for foreigners to grasp
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James,USA

The United States just has far too strong a tradition in our own sports, sports that have shaped our culture, our language, our literature. For people immersed in these sports since childhood it seems rather odd to abandon our traditions to get excited about a game like soccer that far too often represents the worst of foreign cultures.

So, maybe Americans just lack the sophistication, the talent, the atheleticism, and the intellect to play soccer. Of course, that makes little sense when you realize that our current team is in the top eight in the world and that our soccer players tend to be people who couldn't make it in our more challenging sports. Our fouth-raters rank with the best from the world.

And let me close by addressing this issue of sophistication and intelligence. The most common complaints from foreigners about American football and baseball are: "Those games are too complex! Too many rules! Not fast enough!" Which is really nothing more than saying that they are too intellectual and sophisticated for foreigners to grasp.

For all the glorious virtues that I'm constantly told of soccer, I have yet to see evidence that it is a game that brings out the best in fans. What I see the most of is the very worst.
James,USA

Rule one for an international news site: Cut the humour. What you may think is funny others do not. Stick to the facts and let others do the jokes.
Andy Somerville, UK

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You also didn't mention hot dogs or apple pie. Otherwise, fine work
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Scott Hickman,Hawaii, USA

Let's run a competition for best spoof article on the great English media tradition at football competitions. You know the one claiming England will win the Cup after one good game in the tournament. When England lose you can always turn the manager into a turnip, or should I say Svenip.
Fionn, Ireland

Gentlemen, a New World sporting treatise is not complete sans the line in Vegas. You also didn't mention hot dogs or apple pie. Otherwise, fine work.
Scott Hickman,Hawaii, USA

I like having a laugh as much as the next guy, but what is the point of this little exercise? Is it so that you can present a silly, ethnocentric and inaccurate example of how US culture is inferior to your own? Have a nice day, y'all.
Chris, USA

Great effort, but the only American sportswriter who writes like that is an unemployed one. The only American who doesn't find a little trash talking funny, isn't, well, American.
Matthew, USA

Caricature: A style of art whereby obvious features are massively exaggerated for comic effect. Ring any bells?
Ben,Spain

One man's irony is all too often viewed as a pit bull attack by its target. Sports fans worldwide are, unfortunately, myopic when confronted by opposing fans' 'humour'.
Joseph Peranteau, USA

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This article barely makes any sense to me, not that it's not funny, I just can't understand it
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Brian, USA

The farce wasn't perfect (we'd definitely say two-zip), but stylistically it was brilliant - I thought it was hilarious. The naively exuberant optimism of the reporter is a classic American trait, as is the reaction - defensiveness when we think the world doesn't appreciate our greatness as much as we do.
John, USA

As a Brit living in the USA, I can verify this article as very close to the truth. So much so it will probably cause a furore among US soccer supporters. Watch ESPN as they laugh at Team USA's amazingly making it into the "round of eight" and then questioning the meaning of men exchanging soccer vests.
Craig, USA

The only funny Brit is that Simon Cowell from the Pop Idol show. This article barely makes any sense to me, not that it's not funny, I just can't understand it.
Brian, USA

English humour once again evades me, but the laugh out loud comments from some of my fellow Americans left me rolling in the aisles. I think some people have their goal-bags tied too tight.
Christian, USA

I thought the writer was attempting to demonstrate what an American scribe might pen if he were attempting to imitate the British style. If not the article was so far off the mark it mightily struck out.
Kevin Osborne, USA

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I think some people have their goal-bags tied too tight
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Christian, USA

Great imitation of American sports writers. I find that and British irony very, very funny. That is exactly how some would have written it.
Chad Sarnicki, USA

You need to check with a real American sportwriter at the Boston Globe or Chicago Sun Times. We don't write that way.
Mark Hardt, USA

Some Hints:
- Never give the losing score first. It was a two-zip shutout, not the other way around.
- Never call it a "sin bin." It's a penalty box.
- Try and work "bicycle kick" into any soccer story. We like bicycle kicks. They're cool.
Stevie H, USA

Jealousy is an ugly thing. Why would anyone want to sound like a sportswriter? You can keep Beckham, just send us Posh.
Jim, USA

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You need to check with a real American sportwriter at the Boston Globe or Chicago Sun Times. We don't write that way
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Mark Hardt, USA

I have tons of respect for the US Soccer team and it's about time the world takes the team seriously instead of poking fun at them and making jokes about how they are such a bad team and that they had luck getting to the quarters.

Wake up world, the USA has arrived and they will show everyone how good they are. With awesome players like McBride, Mathis, O'Brien and Donovan they will beat Germany.
Mike Brewington, The Netherlands

The style, phrases and terms used were not even close to a 'real' Yank article but it was rather funny and, I might add, 'jolly good try, that'.
Frank, United States

I understand British humour, which is sometimes funny, but this article was dull and lacking any semblance of accuracy. I'm guessing our success in this year's World Cup is causing some nervous energy and some to squirm in their seats - perhaps this is the British way of releasing stress from America's arrival on the world soccer scene.
Jeff,USA

Absolutely spot on spoof analysis of the US style of sports writing. I now work in the US and they do have a sense of humour (honest) but it really is totally different from the typical ironic dry British sense of humour.

I'm pleased to see the USA doing so well in this World Cup but I still feel that most of the USA will never be drawn into the magic of "football" or understand the British sense of humour.
Iain Graham, UK-USA

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Having to endure watching football on ESPN in NY I have to say this article is spot on
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V, England

I recall one of my history books discussing how a decision to use German as the official language of the newly formed United States was narrowly defeated by a single vote. Juding by the American responses to this article, perhaps they should have adopted Germany's language instead of its sense of humour!


Jean,US (French)

Please don't make fun of the USA "soccer" team. They're obviously a superior brand of American: they travelled outside their country without getting completely lost!
Robert, Canada

Having to endure watching football on ESPN in NY I have to say this article is spot on. The guys in my office still don't get it. Half of them thinks it's serious and the others find it offensive.....it's great!

I hope Mickey Owen poaches a couple of net-scores on a offensive power play in the one game series!!
JV, England (Alien in NYC)

The article caused a 'stir stateside'? Are you kidding? The only funny thing in all of this is the predictable and overly dramatic British reaction.
Ryan A., USA

I was embarrassed to read this article. As a daily reader of US newspapers I can safely say that this article is like nothing I have ever read. The coverage the World Cup has been given in the written media. The article makes us English look arrogant and mis-informed.
Richard Levy, UK ex-pat in USA

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I laughed so hard I almost wet myself!
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Tom,USA

Honestly, I like it that you guys are making light-hearted jokes and trying to see things from our perspective, but, as someone else has already said, it just didn't make sense - I could hardly understand it. Good luck against Brazil! I believe y'all are going to do it!
Ryan P.,USA

I didn't realize it was even a joke. Very similar to my lunches with a good English friend of mine, he tells a joke and about 95% of time receives a blank stare from me as I try to piece together the words in my mind in search of what I am supposed to laughing at. No, we will never get your humour.
Bob,USA

My son, who's 14 and has played soccer for over 10 years, could've done a better commentary. I suggest if you don't know the game then don't write about it.
Dijares, USA

I laughed so hard I almost wet myself!
Tom,USA

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"Spunky Germans" "Ron Aldo" - hilarious!
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Alan, USA
I've been a fan of American sports and of soccer in the US for 21 years, and I have no idea what the heck that was! Was that article in English?

I understand it's attempting to be humorous, but it's just not true, it wasn't coherent and does not resemble any sports writing in America.
Jeff,USA

"Spunky Germans" "Ron Aldo" - hilarious!Let's face it y'all, we're pretty easy to lampoon, particularly these days with a famously inarticulate president. And if anything else, this humorous piece shows the Brits are actually taking us seriously.
Alan, USA

Guys - it's a joke! Get it together, they're laughing at us now because we're taking it seriously!
Amy, USA

Who says the Yanks don't have a sense of humour....
Jim,UK

Quite amusing. My countrymen need to lighten up a bit. It's all in good fun.
Scott, United States

I don't really have a problem with poking fun in faux articles. At least we are still a topic of discussion. My only hope is that the BBC writes another spoof about US soccer and how they got into the semi-final on Friday.
Randall Douglas, USA

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The smug, superior attitude of Europeans is getting old
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Chris,US of A
Very funny. Keep laughing - maybe it won't hurt as much when we take over your game.
Chris, USA

I'm a big fan of Robbo, and I can appreciate Brit humour on occasions, but the article was just not funny. In order for these types of things to be amusing, they have to be based in truth, and the author was so wide of the mark in the writing style, it actually turned out to be a commentary on British ignorance, bias and stupidity.

The smug, superior attitude of Europeans is getting old, and the less you have to be superior and smug about (virtually nothing at this point, save soccer -and that's obviously ending too) the more trite it seems.Sad to see you're not dealing with your lesser role in the world more gracefully.
Chris,US of A

It's too bad our American cousins' sense of humour is nowhere near as improved as their football. I believe the article was meant to be light-hearted. Irony anyone?
Chris Chapman, England

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Our stereotypical view on the overuse of clichés by American writers and commentators is justified AND funny
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Simon,England
Being able to laugh at yourself - very important. Understanding irony and humour - also important but rare skills for our American cousins.

This article could have easily been cut straight from a show over here. It was absolutely spot on, and very, very funny. I'm afraid our neighbours south of the border don't like to be teased too much. I would put it down to a national self obsession and international myopia which is clear for all to see.
Garath, Canada

The only thing more amusing than the article is the righteous claptrap of the typically over serious American reactions on this page. Irony isn't the only thing they've failed to grasp over there.

My personal response to the USA win is that it's terrific - finally we have a World Cup with some interesting and unusual nations still left. I hope you go all the way to the final, but you still need to work on your sense of humour...
Nick, Scotland

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I did not find it annoying (or amusing), just boring and hard to follow
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Terry,USA
Please don't take yourselves so seriously. English humour is just as likely to make fun of the English as any other nation. Our stereotypical view on the overuse of clichés by American writers and commentators is justified AND funny.
Simon,England

This reads more like it was written by a Hollywood press writer than a US sports writer. I did not find it annoying (or amusing), just boring and hard to follow.
Terry,USA

The best part was reading the American responses to the article - very amusing!
Ericka, Brazil

Come on US, grow a sense of humour! It's over for you lot anyway. Do you really think you'll beat Germany?

You do? In that case please excuse my opening comment; you clearly have a great sense of humour!
Rab, Northern Ireland

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The UK natives hate their press anyway... the really cruel stuff is being readied for England if or when they lose
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Simon Smith, USA
They've already taken Rugby, slowed it down with ad breaks and called it football. They also play rounders in their pyjamas and call it Baseball. What will they do to our beloved beautiful game?
Jon,UK

Most UK countries have a patron saint. The USA has a patronizing country in England. Most amusing. At least in this article the Brits are "trying" to be funny.

Unfortunately the funniest articles are the ones that are meant to be serious. "Portugal gave the game to the USA", "Mexico thought they only had to show up", "A shame Portugal went out and a third rate USA team advance", etc. Hilarious. Don't bother with the 'light-hearted' stuff, your legitimate articles are the best.

Don't worry about this article fellow yanks, the UK natives hate their press anyway... the really cruel stuff is being readied for England if or when they lose.
Simon Smith, USA

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I see some of our transatlantic cousins have had a serious humour bypass!
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Gaz H,UK
Fantastic article. Unfortunately, judging by the various comments it shows the Americans will never be capable of understanding our good old British humour.
Matt,En-ger-land!

I see some of our transatlantic cousins have had a serious humour bypass! If they never went stereotype-mad in their media themselves that'd be one thing, but whenever you see the UK portrayed on US television or in movies it's almost always a shot of Big Ben with God Save the Queen playing in the background. The character will be some pompous 'your lordship' type! Get a grip guys!
Gaz H,UK

The US commentators have done a pretty good job, though they are limited in the background that they can bring to a game. I wish they would not refer to free kicks as restarts! I recently heard a US commentator refer to the 'Hexagonal stage' of the competition. I think he meant 'eight sides' left ... though of course that would be 'octagonal' (equally ludicrous but at least geometrically correct!)
Pip, England/USA

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Very funny except I had no idea what you were talking about. For future reference if you are going to make fun of us at least do it right
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Kat, USA
Brilliant. Both the article and the comments from the US have made me want to go to the US more than ever. I don't think I can stop laughing.
Will,UK

I have a great friend who is a transplant from England. I call him a Pompous Brit, and he calls me an Arrogant Yank. He sent me this article. I love the idea of Brits poking fun of American culture. Unfortunately, I would not have recognized this article as an attempt at American sports writing had it not been identified as such. The expressions used are either not American, or are extremely outdated. Still, a fun idea.
Glen, USA

After reading some of the comments form 'across the pond,' I certainly realised the truth of the notion, 'American sense of humour is an oxymoron.' Relax, people, don't bite the guy's head off - it was only a joke.
Roman, England

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Totally over the top and ridiculous - but great humour in a Monty Python way
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Daoud, Dubai
Very funny except I had no idea what you were talking about. For future reference if you are going to make fun of us at least do it right. I have no idea where you got those terms but they certainly aren't used in conjunction with sports in America.

How ironic that Americans are always accused of being ill informed idiots when you so eloquently demonstrated a lack of cultural knowledge so thoroughly.
Kat, USA

I must say I find that quite funny! Ah the old British sense of humour still hasn't found its way to America! Oh, and the rest of the world knows that this is real football, not a game where you throw the ball to each other and call it football, surely that's handball?
Stan,England

Totally over the top and ridiculous - but great humour in a Monty Python way. Pity the published responses from US readers reveal a sad inability to laugh at themselves.
Daoud, Dubai

Funny little bit of satire! The style is definitely over the top but the gist of it is there. What's a goalbag?
Michael, USA

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I must say I had quite a good laugh. It sad to see all the Americans taking this so seriously
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Osego Garebamono, Botswana
The article was obviously intended as a light-hearted spoof. What a shame American readers cannot match the impressive performances of their football team and make equally dramatic improvements in one area where they obviously are still deficient - having a sense of humour.
Nick, UK

Good on ya, BBC! I must say I had quite a good laugh. It sad to see all the Americans taking this so seriously. It's just a joke, for crying out loud! I always thought Americans were a people who could laugh at themselves. I guess I should be sin-binned for my outfield naivety.
Osego Garebamono, Botswana

Leave the poor Yanks alone. They've done really well to get this far in the World Cup. Let's not wind them up about the football and leave them to worry about sports that they are good at like heavyweight boxing...
Peter Davies,England

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Having been forced to endure American commentary on the World Cup so far I can say your article was not particularly funny because it was so scarily accurate
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Chris, Northern Ireland (living in NYC)
A bit harsh and to be honest not especially funny. Maybe it was not meant to, but it did come off as a bit superior sounding. I know I get annoyed when the Americans take this attitude about the rest of the world, as they do from time to time, so I don't think we should be doing it to them.
Alistair Strachan, Northern Ireland


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