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Tuesday, 11 June, 2002, 21:43 GMT 22:43 UK
World Cup cap comp 1
England captain David Beckham (r) and Lord Nelson
Madame Tussaud's erects a waxwork statue of the England captain to stand alongside Admiral Nelson in Trafalgar Square.

But whose witty words made us laugh the loudest?


David Beckham's transformation from national villain to national hero in the space of four eventful years seemed to be capped with his match-winning penalty for England against Argentina in Sapporo.

And now British waxwork museum Madame Tussaud's has erected a waxwork dummy of the England skipper on the spare plinth in London's Trafalgar Square.

The winner of this week's competition is Lee Currier from Canada who came up with:

Beckham: That's the problem with the French, off their own soil they're armless.

Another caption competition will appear here soon.


Here are some of the entries that just missed out.

Tussaud's were particularly proud of their Beckham model. Perfect in every detail, they even matched the original's IQ.
Richard Day, Singapore

Now, if I bend this round the lion and straight through Lancaster Gate.
Matt Martin, Saudi Arabia

Two fine Englishmen with heads made of cement!!
Conleth, Ireland

Beckham: "You mark the R's: Rivaldo, Ronaldinho, Ronaldo, Richardinho, Roberto Carlos, Roque Junior and Rogerioceni, and I'll mark the J's and K's: Junior, Juninho, Kaka and Kleberson."
Ron Palmer, Englishmen in Chicago, USA

Even Beckham wasn't immune to the plague of handbag snatching in London.
Hugh Jarse, Singapore

Beckham looks forlornly for his mates who told him to meet at The Admiral Nelson after the match.
Richard Day, Singapore

I've been asked to do columns before, but this is ridiculous.
Terry Killeavy, Nottingham, England

'Never had my hair highlighted this way before.'
Pete, UK

That pigeon had better not come any closer. I left the hair dryer in the hotel room.
John Holmes, England

Beckham in Japan longer than expected...turns into Godzilla.
Keith Lockey, England

Nelson: "Score a couple of goals and break your foot and you're a blinkin' hero...in my day..."
Dave J, England

"Oh! It was all a dream, I'm back in Blighty!"
Andy, England

Shock as Victoria Beckham wears grey frilly skirt...
Liam Fox, UK

Nelson: "Kiss me Hardy" Beckham: "Nah....kiss yer own Hardy"
Lee, Malaysia

Eriksson introduces motionless stone statues into a training session to prepare his players for the defensive might of Denmark.
Joe Simkins, England

"I'll do it, but I want more than cardboard boxes to catch me."
Tony Crammond, England

Nelson was good - but not a patch on Beckham!
Carl, England

No one seriously believed Beckham would accept Noel Edmond's challenge to stand still longer than Admiral Nelson but........
Richard Day, Singapore

Nelson are you sure Japan's that way.
Terry Killeavy, Nottingham, England

"Victoria, lover! Look what I've bought for you this week!"
Phil Broeders, UK

David: "And I thought David Blain was the first to try that!"
Fred, UK

Beckham enlists Nelson's help in his search for the ball from Chris Waddle's 1990 penalty...
Isaac Hill, England

Hang about, I can see FOUR lions!
Sean Penistone, England

The things I do for a new hair colour.....here pidgey...coo coo...
Stephen, Scotland

Nelson "I'd give my right arm to be ambidextrous" Beckham "Doesn't he play for Turkey?"
Stuart, England

No left eye, no left arm, no left foot.
Matt Martin, Saudi Arabia

Hey Becks, I can see your house from up here.
Gerry Helme, England

Admiral Beckham - navigating England through the storm of the World Cup towards victory!
Andrew Kidd, Australia

Beckham: Listen Mr Nelson, I play with Barthez, and with a patch and one arm you may still make France's number one goalkeeper.
Lee Currier, Canada

Beckham thinks: Cor, Mr Mandela's gonna be furious when I tell 'im 'is statue looks nuffink like 'im!
Hugh Jarse, Singapore

"That's the third time that pigeon has circled around me, I'll bet he's up to no good!"
Andy Cintron, New York, USA

I always though David was a giant in football but I didn't think he could shadow Nelsons column.
Catherine O'Brien, England

You're right, Nelson, those Scots don't look happy at all.
Steve B, Scotland

Brooklyn sports new hat to continue Beckham style assault.
mike bester, UK

If he misses a goal, we've trained all the pigeons to dive-bomb him
Rob Falconer, Wales

I reckon they should have put Beckham on top of that column, instead of Sven.
Rob Falconer, Wales

Maybe we've sent the wrong one to Japan!
Rob Falconer, Wales

The marking was pretty slack in the Historic v Contemporary British Heroes match.
Hugh Jarse, Singapore

Beckham responds to jibes about his heading ability by learning to hang in mid-air for an eternity....
Rhys Jaggar, England

Hey mate, that big house at the end of the road reminds me of Beckingham Palace.
Jim, Malaysia

"Blimey, when you said 'England expects' I thought you meant Victoria again!"
Mal Walker, Australia

Brazilian pigeons invade Trafalgar Square.
The eternal optimist, England

"But Victoria, you wax YOUR legs so why can't I?
Nigel Bird, UK

'Must have been difficult taking throw-ins against the French with only one arm, mate!'
Rhys Jaggar, England

"Good, now again, but 'poco piu allegro' this time."
John, Essex, England

David's game of hide-and-seek with Brooklyn reached new heights...
Rhys Jaggar, England

Well Nelson, I hate to say this but "my one's bigger than your one".
Frankie, ENGLAND

"So how do you beat the Spanish Mr Nelson?"
Timothy Stafford, England

I can see my, y'know, house from 'ere.
Graham Johns, Wales...err..England

Next he'll be settling the Kashmir incident with Ronaldo.
Oliver Woods, England

Nelson: "It looks like the pigeons have already got to your head, Becks!"
Tony Martin, UK

Madame Tussaud's got every tiny detail correct except that the wax copy is more intelligent than the real Beckham!
Darren Hart, Australia

'He was the captain of the fleet and I am the captain with the feet'
Anthony Marcham

'Trickster admits to swapping 'wax' Beckham with the real Beckham, the question is now: where are the rest of the real England squad.
Stephen G, Tyne & Wear

Nelson: "Top corner son!"
Tony, England

London's new bird scarer seemed to be keeping the pigeons away.
Jill , UK

Beckham hardens to public exposure.
Gary Taylor, USA

A few more column inches for Beckham.
Hoo Doo Witch, UK

Beckham's stature really had grown since the free kick against Greece...
Nick Hawke, England

Different century mate, but the same result!
Brian Hall, England

According to that dumb blonde bird on Big Brother I should be able to see Cambridge quite easily from up here.
Simon Hepburn, UK

Beckham's search for the ball from Waddle's 1990 penalty continued.
Danny, England

'Victoria, when I said put me on a pedestal, this is not what I meant !'
Linda Morrison, UK

Just as I thought, Beckham's head is even bigger than Nelson's.
Aidan, USA (Ireland)

Another Admirable performance by the English Captain.
Steve, UK

We all know that Beckham stands head and shoulders above the rest, but this is ridiculous.
Tom Hartey, UK

"Victoria, there is no way we are having that in our front garden".
Xenomorph, England

Oh no, it's those bleeding pigeons again.
Arief Leuvenardi, Australia

Two more statuesque performances from David Beckham and Rio Ferdinand. Ferdinand particularly - a pillar of strength in defence.
John Langford, England

Oi, Horatio! I'll swap you right arm for a left toe!
Luke Sturgess, UK

Delight for London's birds as they home in on new target in City's Landscape!
Derek, UK

"You're right Nelson, I can't see any ships either!"
Chris, England

With one eye and an arm in a sling, we could still beat the French.
Christoher Ottaway, UK


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