"All the world's a stage, and all the men and women merely players", opined William Shakespeare.
The world's most famous player had a plethora of choices but has opted to take his final bow in Laa Laa Land.
And when you see what Los Angeles has to offer compared to the rivals competing for David Beckham's signature it's hardly surprising he went for the Galaxy option.
LOS ANGELES
Club: LA Galaxy
Climate: Smog
Food: Supersize
Fashion: Fur (and let's not get started on the women)
Entertainment: Disneyland, Hollywood. Apart from that...
Neighbours: Jack Nicholson, Harrison Ford, Robbie Williams
Pub/club: The Viper Rooms
One to avoid: Sunset Strip (ask Hugh Grant)
Odds: 7/4
MANCHESTER
Club: Manchester United
Climate: Rain
Food: Betty's hotpot
Fashion: Tracksuits and hoodies
Entertainment: Granada Studios, The Curry Mile
Neighbours: Gary Neville, Alex Ferguson, Bez
Pub/club: The Rovers
One to avoid: Moss Side
Odds: 25/1
EAST LONDON
Clubs: West Ham/Leyton Orient
Climate: Drizzle
Food: Pie 'n' mash - just like ma used to make
Fashion: Whatevah
Entertainment: Walthamstow Dogs, sing-song round the old Joanna
Neighbours: Tracey Emin, East 17, Peggy Mitchell
Pub/club: Queen Vic
One to avoid: The Murder Mile
Odds: 9/1 & 500/1
BIRMINGHAM
Club: Aston Villa
Climate: Grey
Food: Curry
Fashion: You what?
Entertainment: Spaghetti Junction
Neighbours: Jasper Carrott, Lenny Henry
Pub/club: Flares
One to avoid: Spaghetti Junction
Odds: 10/1
MILAN
Club: AC Milan
Climate: Blows hot and cold
Food: Pasta, pizza
Fashion: Who's the daddy?
Entertainment: Shop till you drop
Neighbours: Donatella Versace, Silvio Berlusconi
Pub/club: The Shocking Club
One to avoid: Killer Plastic (Italian techno bar)
Odds: 16/1
NORTH LONDON
Club: Tottenham
Climate: See East London
Food: Kebabs
Fashion: See Manchester
Entertainment: See TV guide
Neighbours: From hell
Pub/club: Best not
One to avoid: How long have you got?
Odds: 8/1