By Phil Long
With the Barmy Army in India
I first heard the news, via a text message, as I stood on a busy platform at Cuttack railway station a little before midnight on Wednesday.
It read simply: "Shooting at Leopold's."
As I've learnt during numerous trips to India, nasty incidents do happen from time-to-time out here and, as I fell asleep on the train to Kolkata, guessed this was another of the sporadic bouts of violence that occasionally hit India's cities.
However, the early editions of Thursday's papers that greeted me on arrival at Kolkata's Howrah station quickly, soberingly and shockingly, showed the gruesome scale of the attack on Mumbai.
While England's players have spoken of their shock at seeing their usual hotel, the Taj Mahal Palace, engulfed by flames and gunfire, it was two of the other scenes of the terrorist attack which left me reeling.
Leopold's cafe, not far from the Taj hotel, is one of the iconic venues to enjoy a cold beer in the city and was busy with England supporters each night during our last Test match here in March 2006.
The pictures of the scene of destruction there would have sent a chill down the spine of anyone who has ever enjoyed an evening there but for me it was the scenes from the Chhatrapati Shivaji Terminus that really hit home.
Sat with my rucksack and the day's newspaper, I'd spent hours sat on the station concourse waiting for various delayed trains to take me to various parts of India over the years.
So when I saw the blood smeared floor, abandoned luggage and learnt later of a death toll of nearly 50, I really did feel incredibly closer to the tragedy than the actual 1000 miles it was away.
It's very easy to let your imagination run wild in such situations but I was close to tears as I considered the very likely outcome had I been sitting there waiting for a train on Wednesday night.
With the siege at the Taj being continually broadcast on Indian television it was no surprise when, just a few hours later, it was announced the England team would be returning home to consider their participation on the tour for a few days.
606: DEBATE
Of course, we all know some of the risks we are taking by following England overseas.
We were in India in December 2001 when the Indian Parliament was stormed by militants and just more than a month ago, Guwahati and surrounding towns were rocked by a number of explosions that killed 80 people.
But the sense of remoteness and randomness of those attacks seemed to have been replaced in part, if early reports were to be believed, by a systematic attack on Western visitors to the country.
So, as I sat on Kolkata's wonderful Maiden watching young cricketers hone their skills I did, for more than a fleeting moment, wonder if it was time to come home.
As the weekend has progressed though, Kolkata has continued almost completely as normal and once again it does feel like I am further away from those horrific scenes in Mumbai.
Now it's a case of sitting and waiting while England decide whether or not they want to return to play the Test series.
But for the supporters already out here, one way or another, the tour goes on.
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