Flights of Fancy

Flights of Fancy

Taking aim: Andy "The Viking" Fordham

As true as the arrow
that flieth by day
the spoils the victor will claim
but watch the unknown
for they're never thrown
so take heart
take hold
and take aim

Then bring me a board of burning gold
and my arrows of desire
a comfort fit Hawaiian shirt to unfold
and a flat iron from beside the fire
that I may walk amongst you
where the stereotypes distil
and ponder why some overlook
your talent and your skill

There's no flights of fancy, no corporate stuff
it's a real game when all said and done
no lovely, super, smashing, great
look at what you could've won
just a retro-in-yer-face honesty
with a lust to entertain
and as people are playing it everywhere
isn't this the real people's game?

No delusions of grandeur
to forget or forgive
a local game for local people
wherever you live
with real drinks and proper food
forget it if you wanna prawn sandwich
it's partisan support and passionate crowds
and the chance to extend your language

And how many other sports
can honestly embrace us all
accessible and user-friendly
and you don't have to bring a ball

I've got the stance, the glance
the killer pants
and I've picked up the vibes a real treat
I can clamour for the glamour
I can throw in a spanner
and all to Jocky Wilson's 'Reet Petite'
I've got the character, the showmanship
the razz-matazz, the charm
and a glorious nine-darter
tattooed on my arm
so all of us, admit it
hand on heart
we've all had a scuffle
with a tungsten dart
be it 501
or Round the Board
we've been there and had a go
and probably scored

So I must go down to the oche again
aboard the 501
and stand with legs akimbo
and whisper 'game on'
for there I shall remember
across those distant miles
oh to walk again through the Seven Stars
and stick to the carpet tiles

The game shot, set and match
no longer in denial
I've started so I'll finish
and I'll finish in style