Caption Competition 157

Denmark's Thomas Bjorn went barmy in the bunker during the final round of the Open.

It was all going so well for Bjorn; he was clear of the field, looking serene and in total control as he came to the closing holes of his final round.

But then, disaster at the 16th, as the Dane double-bogeyed and saw his Open dream disappear in the sand.

And this week's Cap Comp King is an old friend: step forward Mr Si Griffin, who spawned an army of imitators with this gem:

Little Tommy was left distraught after the crazed golfer obliterated his sand castle.

Yet another goodie bag will be sent imminently to Mr Griffin's house.

---

Smoke joke

Smoking stunts your golf.
Adrian Wade, Canada

BEST IN CATEGORY The smoke machine goes into overdrive as Bjorn does his Take That dance move Jason Braier, London

The original Hamlet moment.
Dave Richman, Bracknell

Smokey and the Sandpit.
Si Griffin, UK

Bjorn's chances go up in smoke.
David, London

Bjorn's chain-smoking begins to affect his play.
Mike Goudge, UK

Golfer tries to extinguish fire with sand wedge on 16th hole with no success.
Mike Goudge, UK

Note to self: don't react to anyone's Hamlet cigar gags in the clubhouse!
Tara, UK

Thomas thought Davis Love III's trademark 'exploding golfball' wheeze a trifle ill-timed.
Peter N., Ashford

And I would have won if Tiger Woods hadn't set fire to my pants
Clare Daniele, Wales

Hey, Thomas! There's a Red Indian over here, and he says you've just insulted him.
Clare Daniele, Wales

Bjorn's effort ended at the 16th when smoke started belching from his trousers.
C. Hunter, England

Whoever said Bjorn's golfing was a smoke screen for other activities was soon proved right.
David, London

All Bjorn's early celebratory cigar did was cause issues with his vision!
David, London

---

Say what you see

BEST IN CATEGORY Bjorn's quest for the title was scuppered by the unexpected arrival of The Fog Max, UK

Bjorn swings blindly after one of his eyes pops out and sand gets in his other.
Mike Goudge, U.K.

Bjorn was obviously distracted by the giant bunker turtle laying its eggs....
Dan B, Barnet

Thomas passes the time by digging a pond while waiting for the cap comp team to update the site.
James Atkinson, Sheffield, UK

Open officials toss fishing net over Bjorn to make him stop.
Brian Lang, Chicago, USA

The safety-obsessed Bjorn was determined to keep the paths safe, should the weather turn icy.
Martin Mills, Morpeth

It was a bad time to discover that Sandwich was built on a volcano.
Naomi, York

Bjorn's flares were beginning to hamper his game.
Ollie B, Southampton UK

Under the mistaken impression that Bjorn is being held hostage in the bunker by the Sandwich chapter of Al Quaida Terrorist Network, a rather over enthusiastic Ashford And Folkestone special forces team fire gas canisters in preparation for a raid.
Rob Brown, UAE

Thomas Bjorn demonstrates his bunker shot using nothing more than a carving fork
Rob Brown, UAE

Bjorn becomes distracted as the unexpected heat wave causes a jar of Horlicks in his pocket to explode.
Rob Brown, UAE

In a poor display of golfing etiquette Bjorns playing partner empties the sand from his shoes as Thomas takes his shot.
Rob Brown, UAE

Thomas desperately swung and swung but he was unable to struggle free from the quicksand.
Sarah A, High Wycombe,Bucks

Bjorn overdoes the pepper on his boiled egg...
Rob Brown, UAE

Bjorn's sizzling beef packed lunch was really quite off-putting.
Si Griffin, UK

The no-headed, one-legged golfer had done well to be leading up until the 16th.
Huw Roberts, South Wales

Bjorn uses his magic dust cloud to propel his ball toward the green.
Stephen Tucker, USA

Yeti found in Kent bunker.
Alan, London

The ageing of the photo around the ages shows that this is an original 1672 First Open championship photo.
David, London

Montgomerie's temper extended to new lengths when he proceeded to throw sand bombs at the leader!
Johnny McDonald, Comber, N.Ireland

Fluffy Afghan Hound streaks across golf course.
Curly, Barnet

..and Bjorn's Open chances are cruelly taken away, as the golfing Gods litterally pluck the ball out of the sky.
Sarah L, UK

Strokes of luck and dust of dreams......turned nightmare!
sarfraz khatib, Mumbai, India

Thomas Bjorn saved his favourite club from the encroaching sandstorm...at the expense of his eyesight.
mark tiernan, nottingham, england

Thomas's experimental fake tan applicator wasn't going well.
James Atkinson, Sheffield, UK

Future Open championships to be held inland as freak wave hits competitor.
Dan B, Barnet

Meteor lands near golfer.
Pete, UK

Bjorn was in the wrong place at the wrong time as the crop dusting began.
Si Griffin, UK

The Sandwich Sand Witch is captured on camera for the first time...
Tall Tone, Chelmsford, England

All Bjorn was trying to do was fly his kite, but the sand just kept getting in the way!
David, London

NEWSFLASH - Cap Comp photographer self-combusts in bunker.
Royter, UK

With the tide moving in Bjorn quickly got his ball out of the sand.
David, London

Despite taking prescribed medication, Bjorn's double bogey is followed by jets of nasal steam.
C. Hunter, England

Bjorn's strenuous efforts merely resulted in his glass eye flying out of its socket.
C. Hunter, England

Future Open championships to be held inland as freak wave hits competitor.
Dan B, Barnet

Bjorn's problems were not helped by a spectator throwing a hard-boiled egg.
C. Hunter, England

Bjorn discovers the down side of bringing along his three-year-old son complete with bucket and spade.
Dan B, Barnet

Try as he might Bjorn just couldn't get his sandcastle to stay upright.
David, London

The moment when Ben Curtis remembered that his Hoover bag needed emptying.
Naomi, York

After indulging in his favourite past time of playing in the sand Bjorn quickly gets on with his golf.
David, London

Third 'The Mummy' movie is looking poor on the special effects front.
Mike Goudge, U.K.

Clearly depressed, Bjorn was playing under a cloud.
Clare Daniele, Wales

Maybe I should take up baseball.
Gary Brown, Merseyside, UK

Sands ball balancing act goes down a storm.
Mike Goudge, U.K.

The Sahara had a long way to come to be a championship golf course!
David, London

"Thomas...THOMAS! Wait until the ball lands before you try to hit it."
C. Hunter, England

Now that's what I call a difficult lie!
Nick, london

Oy, Montgomerie! Will you stop mucking about with that vacuum cleaner?
Clare Daniele, Wales

Moves were in hand to ban the tradition of barbecuing an ox at the 16th.
C. Hunter, England

Always the showman, Thomas takes a shot while doing a screaming do-nut.
C. Hunter, England

Frustrated golfer Bjorn gave up fishing after his catch exploded on the river bank.
C. Hunter, England

Bjorn's challenge collapsed when he trod on a land-mine.
C. Hunter, England

---

Cap comp classics

BEST IN CATEGORY 'If I ever get out of here', thought Thomas, 'I'll lump anyone who makes a comment about superglue...' Mark, London

...and that's what Thomas thinks of Ernie's painting!
Sarah L, UK

I am a golfer ...get me out of here!!
James Atkinson, Sheffield, UK

Having cracked the BBC website, the superglue bandit glues sand pixels over half of this week's cap comp image.
John Lewis, Finland

Ernie Els decides to buy one of those moving sand pictures this time.
Clare Daniele, Wales

After Ernie's oil painting, Thomas tries his hand at air brushing.
James Atkinson, Sheffield, UK

This week saw a re-issue of the Leslie Neilson video "How to play better golf".
James Atkinson, Sheffield, UK

Superglue high jinx turn sinister when a glue-coated Thomas a covered in sand.
James Atkinson, Sheffield, UK

Despite strenuous efforts and a sack of superglue releasing powder, Thomas was unable to let go of his club.
I. Diot, England

With his feet super glued to the spot Bjorn accepted his fate of death by sand.
David, London

Despite the superglue, Thomas Bjorn comes unstuck in the bunker.
Si Griffin, UK

"I can't believe I fell for Ernie's 'picture of the green' trick!"
Si Griffin, UK

Recently ousted Ernie Els attacks new picture with beige aerosol.
C. Hunter, England

Thomas had overheard where Ernie had buried his fabulous art collection.
Martin Mills, Morpeth

Thomas vented his frustration when the ball became superglued to a spectator's camera.
I. Diot, England

Hey, Ernie Els! Stop waving that ruddy painting about, will you?
Clare Daniele, Wales

---

Pun fun

BEST IN CATEGORY The Dane's slices were getting progressively rasher. Mark, London

Forgive me father for I have sand...
Ashley, UK

Bjorn needed a "birdie", but he ended up with a "lark" on the BBC Cap Comp...
Adrian Wade, Canada

Dane comes to a sand still.
Mike Goudge, U.K.

Dane it! Dane it all to hell!
Stephen Tucker, USA

Bjorn's coach's advice to 'Gobi the Open champion' was taken far too literally ...
Andy Sweet, Atherstone, UK

Bonfire of the calamities?
Andrew Sweet, Atherstone, UK

Just as he was about to bring home the bacon, Thomas finds a pig of a lie and the Dane packs up any chance of winning his first major.
Colin Russell, UK

Quite simply, a ball's up...
Diana Dewar, Canada

Bjorn sands alone.
Mike Goudge, U.K.

Mist again!
John Lewis, Finland

And a big sand for the runner up.....
John Lewis, Finland

Oi! Tell that Geyser to get out of the way.
Naomi, York

Flaming dune.
Nick, London

Club Sandwedge anyone...
Ollie B, Southampton UK

Thomas Bjorn's chances of winning met a disappointing end, as he found himself being en'golf'ed by sand on the 16th.
Simon, London

To cheer himself up as his Open dream dies, Thomas Bjorn shows everybody the best way to do a Sandy Lyle impression.
Glenn, London

"Son of a beach!!"
Mark, London

Tom Cruise rehearses for his latest role in "Bjorn on the 20th of July!"
Ollie B, Southampton UK

Ben Curtis was laughing all the way to the bunk.
Ryan Spencer, Watford

By the time he reached the 16th hole, Bjorn was having severe difficulty shaking off the cloud hanging over his Championship credentials.
Huw Roberts, South Wales

Great Dane's game goes to the dogs
Adrian Wade, Canada

Bjorn took the phase "you're on fire" too literally.
Adam pitt, swindon

Bjorn examines a sand map of the Middle East before being en-Gulfed.
Mike Goudge, UK

Spon-Daneious combustion.
Mike Goudge, UK

I think I've found Weapons of Grass Destruction.
Clare Daniele, Wales

For poor old Thomas golf has its up sand downs
Nick, london

Thomas found that the sand clouded his judgement
Richard Morris, Hamilton

He's has DUST thrown it all away!
Rick Baker, Grimsby, UK

Sand and deliver!
Rick Baker, Grimsby, UK

Another one FIGHTS the dust
Rick Baker, Grimsby, UK

Rotten Sandwedge
Ollie B, Southampton UK

Bjorn does his best Sandy Lie..le impression!
Ollie B, Southampton UK

Bjorn claimed his ball was floating on a pillar of sand, but everyone knew that was just a bad lie.
Si Griffin, UK

Bjorn had discovered the most effective club cleaning technique was sand-blasting.
Martin Mills, Morpeth

Turkey Sand wedge.
Martin Mills, Morpeth

The dyslexic Genie granted Thomas three swishes.
Alan Baxter, UK

"Quick, Sand!"
David, London

Bjorn's balls up.
Mike Goudge, U.K.

Thomas Bjorn in a dust up.
Mike Goudge, U.K.

With a sneeze like that, I'm not surprised he's double-bogeyed
Clare Daniele, Wales

As the dust gets up Bjorn's nose all he can think about are bogeys.
David, London

A bad time to pick your bogeys, Thomas.
Naomi, York

Thomas Bjorn makes a complete smorgasbord of the Sandwich Open.
Simon, Hitchin

---

Miscellaneous

BEST IN CATEGORY Little Tommy was left distraught after the crazed golfer obliterated his sand castle. Si Griffin, UK

In a fit of rage, Bjorn destroys Curtis' first professional attempt at sandcastle building.
Ian Green, Welwyn Garden City, Hertfordshire

How am I supposed to see the green in this sandstorm.
James Wicker, Romford, Essex

Bjorn's wish for the ground to just swallow him up comes true.
Mark Hanvey, Belfast, N.Ireland

Bjorn was distracted by the cloud of dust created by the Roadrunner escaping the Coyote.
Shawn Skellon, w-s-m

Thomas Bjorn said afterwards that he had dropped the shots because the ghost of Colin Montgomerie had hindered his vision.
Bobby Mac, Shetland

When suddenly, a small tornado saved the ball from Bjorn's mighty swing...
Jordan Vallis, Ontario, Canada

D'oh,. Never mind it'll come out next time.
Andrew Gilbert, Norwich

Thomas kindly obliges the camera man when he asked him to do the shot again after running out of film.
James Atkinson, Sheffield, UK

And here on Crimewatch we're showing the sort of scam that's happening all too often these days. Someone throws sand in some poor golfer's face and then drives away in his golf buggy.
Clare Daniele, Wales

They always said that beach golf wouldn't be possible.
David, London

It was the groundskeeper's little joke... Each year, for an entire week before The Open, he'd feed the sand gophers BEANS!
Adrian Wade, Canada

Officials were quick to stamp a government health warning on Bjorn. "Heavy Stroking can Kill".
Gerry Slawson, UK

The bicycle clips failed, last nights curry took over...
Gerry Slawson, UK

Thomas Bjorn's clearance of the Kent landmines went according to plan!
Ted page, Chesterfield, UK

Desperate measures after Tony Robinson's "Time Team" show gets shortened to a half hour slot.
Dave Harrington, Liverpool

I thought Montgomerie fell in the clubhouse!
Johnny McDonald, Comber, N.Ireland

When Bjorn boasted after the third round that his rivals wouldn't see him for dust, this might not be quite what he meant...
John Lewis, Finland

A Who's Who of Golf: Bjorn, Thomas. Nationality: Danish. Clubs: Not very well.
John Lewis, Finland

Ok, so I messed up. Can you stop kicking a guy when he's down.
Thomas Bjorn, Denmark

It was then that Thomas realised he really needed to replace his egg-timer with a decent watch.
Naomi, York

Golf? Balls!
John Lewis, Finland

Faulty colostomy bag is almost par for the course.
Howard Barnes, South Wales

The old exploding shoe-polish joke works yet again.
Clare Daniele, Wales

As the valuable gold dust drifted by someone shouted "BOTTLE IT".

Thomas duly obliged...
Alan Coleman, Cheshire

Hermione's 'clubus avoidus' charm worked a treat on the ball.
Dave Harrington, Liverpool

A keen golfer himself, Dracula realised that perhaps a night time round would have been more sensible.
Dave Harrington, Liverpool

The genie disappears in a puff of smoke as he buggers up another wish-granting session.
Jason Braier, London

Bjorn: "I knew this was a links course, but I didn't realise the beach was so close".
Sonny , Harrow

Bjorn joins a select band whose hopes of world domination perished in a bunker.
Simon, Hitchin

Despite what Thomas said, this obviously wasn't a good time to prospect for oil.
James Atkinson, Sheffield, UK

Bjorn's excessive thigh movement on his swing cause a friction burn.
Mike Goudge, UK

Bjorn again Christian half thinks about going over to the dark side.
Mike Goudge, UK

Ok...who spilt their tea on the caption comp photo..???
Michael, Perth, Australia

Cap Comp in turmoil as photographer's cat is sick over this week's picture.
Sean Murphy, UK

The prize of 'Prettiest shape while playing bunker shot' came as no consolation for Bjorn.
Sarah L, UK

Thomas knew that the 'Sand Save' trophy would not be finding its way back to Silkeborg this year...
Pete N., Ashford

Suddenly the odds on Bjorn winning the Dubai Dessert Classic began to lengthen.
Nick, London

Thomas rues the day he dismissed Roman Abramovich's multi-million pound offer for his club as a wind-up.
Mark Tiernan, Nottingham, England

When Bjorn was younger, he weighed 90lbs and all the tour bullies used to kick sand at him... But now he's 190lbs! He swallowed 100 lbs of sand.
Adrian Wade, Canada

After the ball rolled back into his footprint, Thomas learned yet another disadvantage of wearing high heels.
Adrian Wade, Canada

...meanwhile, civil engineers and heavy machinery are battling to repair the previous 15 holes.
C. Hunter, England

No one was more surprised than Thomas when he was engulfed by a giant jelly fish.
James Atkinson, Sheffield, UK

Davis Love's hayfever got him just at the wrong time.
Stephen, N Ireland

Thomas totally misinterpreted his sports psychologist who told him to "dig deep".
James Atkinson, Sheffield, UK

Thomas throws a paddy when finding out all the Sandman/Metallica/Mummy 3 gags have been posted already.
James Atkinson, Sheffield, UK

The BBC regretted spilling coffee over their only Thomas Bjorn in bunker piccy.
Ollie B, Southampton UK

After this incident, Alex "Hurricane" Higgins has since been banned from spectating.
Tom, England

Bjorn knew he shouldn't have thrown a rock at that bees nest
Tom, England

We've had a phone call from a Mister Bjorn in Kent who heard a rumour there could be a sandstorm on the way; well don't worry Mr Bjorn there isn't.
Nick Pont, Harefield, Middx

Dane strain.
Mike Goudge, U.K.

Smashes the ashes and Dane to dust.
Mike Goudge, U.K.

Thomas, Thomas! Stop now - it's 2004.
Naomi, York

Another one bites the dust!
David, London

---

Regulars' banter

BEST IN CATEGORY Outrage as Si Griffin's yacht hits a sand bank near the Open golf tournament. "I was aiming for the Caption Comp photographer", he claimed. Steve Godrich, UK

Si reacts angrily at the prospect of C Hunter winning a second (though deserved) Cap Comp title.
Stephen Tucker, USA

I may never win a Cap Comp, but it seems I'm getting to grips with it.
Stephen Tucker, USA

John Lewis. Never Knowingly Underpar.
Si Griffin, UK

Despite Ernie's wife being an oil painting, he still left her for dust.
Si Griffin, UK

Stephen Tucker gets to grips with golf.
David, London

C Hunter kicks up a fit after Stephen Tucker, USA, refuses to recognise last week's winning caption as the work of a regular.
C. Hunter, England

Thomas searches manically for his pen to compose a caption to beat C Hunter's "Conceived in the open...." which is already several stokes in front.
James Atkinson, Sheffield, UK

Si Griffin experiences some problems with his speedboat's exhaust output.
John Lewis, Finland

Cloud of dust prevents Stephen Tucker from spotting that C. Hunter IS a regular.
Mark, London

Darren Starkey's sister drops her compact at an inopportune moment.
Naomi, York

So that's what happened to Ed Duffy.
Neill, UK

Helpful caption competition judges test if it's feasible to hit a BBC Goody Bag all the way to the USA for Stephen Tucker, to save postage.
Clare Daniele, Wales

Si Griffin's groundsmen's enthusiastic digging was a sight to behold.
James Atkinson, Sheffield, UK

At the 16th hole, Ashley's sinister silence finally breaks Bjorn's nerve.
C. Hunter, England

All that was left was cloud of smoke when Bjorn told Si Griffin it was his turn to get the drinks in at the 19th.
Mike Goudge, UK

Caption overlord Si Griffin is caught on film sand skiing.
Mike Goudge, UK

There's no need for Thomas to take out his frustrations on Si's sand castle!
Sarah L, UK

Bjorn kicks up a fit after no regular won even a category last week.
Stephen Tucker, USA

Si Griffin's attempts at 'Genuine comedy gold' are dynamited by Thomas Bjorn.
Mike Goudge, UK

Field tests for Slawson Enterprises ground-breaking invisibility spray are at an advanced stage.
John Lewis, Finland

Thomas fills sandbags at high speed for the impending war between Niaomi and Darren Starkey's sister.
James Atkinson, Sheffield, UK

So, where're you hiding, Naomi?
Darren Starkey's sister, Sunderland

Monty of Ireland inadvisedly intervenes in a spat between Darren Starkey's sister and Naomi of York.
I Moanback, Sunderland

---

Name game

BEST IN CATEGORY Bjorn Again. And again and again. David Murray, Dublin

Thomas claims an imposter took his shot on the 16th: apparently he wasn't Bjorn yesterday.
Si Griffin, UK

Once again Sandy Lyle lives up to his name in the British Open.
Miltos Tsiantis, Oxford, UK

After Canterbury, the pilgrims moved on to Sandwich but still no-one managed to find Thomas a bucket.
Simon, Hitchin

Dusty Springfield
Craig Steele, Scotland

'Burnhard' Langer plays his last shot....
Andrew Sweet, Atherstone, UK

Thomas Bjorn dramatically fails in his audition to play the title role of "Torrance of Arabia."
Clare Daniele, Wales

There's one Bjorn every minute.
Nick, London

"WOW!" cried an American voice in the distance "Betcha couldn't do THAT again". "You're on" replied Thomas, rising immediately to the challenge and proving, yet again, "there's one Bjorn every minute".
Simon, Hitchin

Bjorn free...as free as the sand blows!
Tara, UK

And next to play is... Bjorn Again
Tall Tone, Chelmsford, England

Bjorn free...
Alan, London

A Bjorn loser.
Stephen Tucker, USA

Having been wedged in a tight place, Thomas bunkers down and sends his ball air-bjorn.
Stephen Tucker, USA

Meet Sandy Pile!
Rick Baker, Grimsby, UK

C Hunter is obviously a Bjorn again winner!
Curly, Barnet

Air Bjorn.
Mike Goudge, UK

Bjorn stupid.
James Atkinson, Sheffield, UK

Despite being killed in a previous episode of Star Trek, the dreaded Sand Monster was Bjorn again.
Si Griffin, UK

A remake of the classic hit, "Bjorn to be wild"
Derek Field, Middlesbrough, England

Town in Bedfordshire denies bribing BBC Caption competition photographer.
Sandy Beds, Sandy, Beds.

Conceived in the Open. Bjorn in a bunker.
C. Hunter, England

Bjorn to be wild.
Martin Mills, Morpeth

Denmark's bid for glory was still-Bjorn.
C. Hunter, England

Thomas wishes he was Bjorn again.
David, London

I wish I'd never been Bjorn!
Clare Daniele, Wales

---

Mistaken Identity

Demonstrating his uncanny eye for the ball, David Seaman takes up golf....
John Lewis, Finland

After relegation, Sunderland defender Berndt Haas takes up golf....
Andrew Sweet, Atherstone, UK

Billy Whizz tries his hand at golf.
Mitesh Shah, England

The imitating of Michael Jackson's one hand with glove one without didn't help Bjorn one bit!
David, London

---

Sur-really great

BEST IN CATEGORY Bjorn unadvisedly propels his ball towards a rift in the space-time continuum Si Griffin, UK

Although Buffy's golfer-disguise didn't fool the approaching demon, her decapitation-flopshot-combo was superbly timed.
Dave Harrington, Liverpool

Bjorn moves his club away from the rare but vicious "frilled sand monster."
Stephen Tucker, USA

The sand monster leaps with excitement at the prospect of getting in the Cap Comp photo.
Stephen Tucker, USA

Cherie Blair's haunting voice makes its way across Europe.
Ibi, London

The fisherman leaned back and let out some line as the huge sand eel he'd just caught struggled for freedom.
Jason Braier, London

Bjorn defied the judges and took his lucky spinal cord with him to the 16th.
Michael Eaton, England

Spirit of the sand pinches Bjorn's boiled egg.
Curly, Barnet

Curtis, having signed a pact with the devil so he could win, watches Satan come to carry off Bjorn.
Stephen Tucker, USA

The course claims its latest victim.
Stephen Tucker, USA

The sand finally hits back after being beaten with a club so many times.
Stephen Tucker, USA

Thomas was trapped in a huge lava lamp.
Ben Westoby, Grantham

Warner Bros. will not accept responsibility for Tassie Devil's "subtle" toilet break at the 18th green!
Ali Evans, Australia

Actually, it's not sand that blurs the picture, that's your retina detaching.
Stephen Tucker, USA

Dusty the dust cloud plays keepy-uppy with Bjorn's ball.
Stephen Tucker, USA

As the sand monster moves in to eat Bjorn, all he can do is wave his club in horror.
Stephen Tucker, USA

Small alien invaders in golf ball sized craft begin their vendetta against Denmark.
Mike Goudge, UK

Bjorn's Ghost of a chance physically manifests itself at the most inappropriate time.
Ollie B, Southampton UK

Ben Says "Boy I have put up an Antari Fogger, stay clear if you can!"
Sarfraz Khatib, Mumbai, India

The lotto machine finally explodes as the last ball pops out.
Steve Franklin, Barrow in Furness

No one was more surprised than Thomas when he was engulfed by a giant jelly fish.
James Atkinson, Sheffield, UK

As Thomas Bjorn's head exploded his glass eye dropped gently back into the bunker.
Nick Pont, Harefield, Middx

The sand man ghost tries its hardest to catch that damn golf ball.
Matt Dews, Cardiff, UK

As you watch again in slow motion, you can actually see the bunker reaching out to reclaim the ball.
Si Griffin, UK

Bjorn's view of the green was obstructed by the world's biggest poppadum.
Grae, Feltham

Will you golfers please leave my eggs alone?!
A. Seagull, A bunker, Royal St. Georges.

Thomas Bjorn never played a round without his friend Harvey, a huge invisible rabbit.
Clare Daniele, Wales

Bjorn's caddy is vapourised when hit by golf ball after a powerful shot.
Mike Goudge, U.K.

"Die you vermin, die!" Thomas' deep hatred of sandflies cost him dear.
Martin Mills, Morpeth

All too common but only fleetingly seen in its true form, this Sand Demon is captured nodding Bjorn's ball back into its lair.
Tall Tone, Chelmsford, England

Ectoplasm was a common manifestation at the haunted hole.
C. Hunter, England

The giant sand rabbit swallows Thomas Bjorn whole.
Neill, UK

Thomas Bjorn's genie appeared out of the bottle at just the wrong moment
Clare Daniele, Wales

---

On song

BEST IN CATEGORY The biggest Danish disaster since Aqua's 'Barbie Girl' Martin Mills, Morpeth

Oh yes I'm the great suprendo, woo woo woo, pretending that I'm doing well, woo woo woo...
Simon, Liverpool

{sings} "Mama Mia, Here I go again. Oh my, how could that has missed, er... Mama Mia, did it slow again?! Oh my... double-bogey vista. Here stands the brokenhearted. Bjorn, with his luck departed. On no, the yank is going to steal the show..."
Adrian Wade, Canada

Bunker loopy nuts are we!
Rick Baker, Grimsby, UK

There once was a not so great Dane,
Who, while leading the comp went insane,
In a bunker at Sandwich
He flunked with a sand wedge
Again, and again and again!
Rob Brown, UAE

Mr Sandman, find me a green, make it the greenest, that I've ever seen.
James Atkinson, Sheffield, UK

Another one bites the dust.
Natalie Boardman, Birkenhead, UK

'Bjorn three, from out of the bunker...' (to be sung)!
Andy Sweet, Atherstone, UK

Global warming scares prove correct as remake of 'Singing in the Rain' umbrella routine turns into a farce...
Andy Sweet, Atherstone, UK

"Goodness gracious Danes ball's on fire"
Mike Goudge, UK

Nobody was surprised when Thomas decided to do the Metallica classic "Enter Sandman" on the karaoke.
James Atkinson, Sheffield, UK

To hell with it all, I'm going to reform ABBA.
Clare Daniele, Wales

Not being a music fan didn't help Thomas when trying to "walk like an egyptian."
James Atkinson, Sheffield, UK

"Mr Sandman loses his dream"
Mike Goudge, U.K.

Metallica's video for 'Enter Sandman' failed to capture the gist of the song.
Si Griffin, UK

Sand sneeze, and bumps-a-daisy
Darren Starkey's sister, Sunderland

"Oh Mr Sandman, bring me a dream, this isn't has half as bad as it really seems."
David Baker, Southend, Essex