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Last Updated: Monday, 31 October 2005, 13:01 GMT
Quotes of the week
Jose Mourinho with Arsene Wenger in the background

Wenger has a real problem with us and I think he is what you call in England a voyeur. He is someone who likes to watch other people.

There are some guys who, when they are at home, have this big telescope to look into the homes of other people and see what is happening. Wenger must be one of them - and it is a sickness.
Chelsea boss Jose Mourinho launches an astonishing attack on Arsenal rival Arsene Wenger.

I want to give my congratulations to them because they won. But we were the best team.
Mourinho in typically gracious mood after his side's Carling Cup defeat to Charlton on penalties.

They would be as well having Roger de Courcey and Nookie Bear for manager because Romanov just wants a puppet he can work.
Former Hearts defender Allan Preston on George Burley's exit from Hearts, which reportedly followed a row with owner Vladimir Romanov.

Upset? No, I would have joined them if I could.
Sunderland boss Mick McCarthy gives his reaction to the thousands of fans who left the Stadium of Light early during Sunderland's 4-1 thrashing by Portsmouth.

We should have had a penalty. But there was as much chance of us getting that as me making my way home under my own steam, flapping my arms.
McCarthy recalls the 3-2 derby defeat at Newcastle. Things can only get better, Mick - can't they?

Andrew 'Freddie' Flintoff

Coming back from Test matches or coming back from the shops and there are cameras outside the house. How many times can they follow you to Booths supermarket? It's amazing!
Andrew Flintoff on the price of Ashes fame.

When a small team plays a big team their manager's team talk will have been: "Let's see if they've just turned up for the fish and chips"
Newcastle boss Graeme Souness on his side's win at Blundell Park.

If we accept that women can enter our tournaments then it applies that men can play with women. I am definitely going to approach them to get an application and if they let me play in the qualifying event then I will. I'll even wear a kilt and shave my legs.
Jean Van de Velde believes if women should be allowed to enter the men's Open Championship, the reverse should apply to the women's Open.

The only disappointing thing was none of the players asked for my autograph or to have their picture taken with me!
Gazza on life as boss of Kettering Town.

Never mind over the moon, we're over Jupiter.
Brighton chairman Dick Knight after the club win the right to build a new stadium.

Ken Dodd
Any excuse for a picture of Doddy

It was like giants against Ken Dodd's Diddy Men
Wigan boss Paul Jewell on facing the tall boys of Fulham.

I don't know what this mystery thing is that I'm meant to be passing on - what is it? A torch, a flag, a baton?
Tim Henman reacts to newspaper suggestions that he will be handing over the reins to Andy Murray, following defeat by the young pretender at the Swiss Indoors.

I've never beaten Tim in practice. In fact I've not beaten him at anything - we often play backgammon and he beats me at that as well!
Andy Murray before his victory over Tim Henman in Switzerland. Never mind, Timmy, there's always the board games!

I described him last year as a tube of toothpaste we keep squeezing. I think we have opened up a Stanley knife and scraped out the last dregs. And that is a compliment.
Saracens boss Steve Diamond on Kyran Bracken after Saracens beat Biarritz 22-10 in Heineken Cup.

The world according to Mourinho
31 Oct 05 |  Chelsea

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