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Last Updated: Tuesday, 8 March 2005, 09:56 GMT
Quotes of the week
Delia Smith and fan

A message to the best football supporters in the world. We need a 12th man here. Where are you? Where are you? Let's be 'avin you! Come on!
Delia 'I haven't been on the cooking sherry, honest' Smith tries to rally the troops at half-time during Norwich City's game with Manchester City.

If I made a mistake then I apologise. I am happy that I'm not going to jail because of that
Chelsea manager Mourinho reacts to being sent off in the League Cup final.

How could they not know? It's not chewing gum, doping is like making love, you need two to do it, the doctor and the athlete
Michel Platini airs his doubts over doping denials at Juventus.

I think I must have run over six black cats since I've been at Wolves
Wolves boss Glenn Hoddle after his side draw their 10th game in 13 under him.

Trying to explain this performance is like trying to row upstream in a barbed wire canoe
Wakefield Wildcats coach Shaun McNally says what everyone else was thinking after his side were on the wrong end of the London Broncos' record Super League victory by 72-8.
Andy Johnson takes a penalty
Andy Johnson - spot on

He goes into the box, and does very well at falling over. Remarkably well
Birmingham manager Steve Bruce on Andrew Johnson after the Crystal Palace striker had won one and scored two penalties in the 2-0 Barclays Premiership win over the Blues.

It's very difficult to imagine another season like that, but I'm like the good wines. Getting better with age
Golfer Miguel Angel Jimenez during the Dubai Desert Classic.

We're 5-0 down with a minute to go on this one
QPR boss Ian Holloway admits frustration in his bid to sign Andrew Davies from Middlesbrough, after the defender allegedly wanted more money.

When my mum was running our house, when I was a kid, all the money was put into tins. She knew what was in every tin and I know how much I've got in my tin - that's the way we'll run this club
Holloway shows his metal.

I started on Shrove Tuesday and then by Ash Wednesday something had happened and I'd had a bottle of beer
Mick McCarthy on giving up the pop for Lent.

I'd f****** strangle him with his own tongue
Crystal Palace chairman Simon Jordan on how he'd deal with Craig Bellamy.

Andy Johnson takes a penalty
Andy Johnson - spot on

I had an Aston Martin phone worth 15,000 given to me as a present. I dropped it in a gin and tonic about 15 seconds after opening it
Loadsamoney Jordan again.

They moaned after my second game - I'm told they moaned after Villa won the European Cup because they didn't win it in style!
Aston Villa boss David O'Leary on the fans who sit behind him every home game.

He led with his head, he didn't head-butt
West Ham boss Alan Pardew tries to justify Tomas Repka's, er, head-butt which led to a red card against Preston.

The old man is back!
John Mayock, 34, after winning silver in the European Indoor 3000m.

T-Shirt slogan of the week: "Let's Be Avin' You!"
Norwich fan sitting next to Delia Smith for the game with Chelsea.





SEE ALSO
Recipe for disaster
04 Mar 05 |  Robbo



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