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Last Updated: Monday, 1 January 2007, 14:38 GMT
Quotes of the Year Part II
It's been a colourful old year as far as sport is concerned. Zidane saw red, Materazzi saw stars and Poll saw yellow - three times.

England fans might want to erase 2006 from their minds, but before we see the old year out, take 10 minutes to have a laugh at what happens when sporting folk open their mouths in the second part of our top 2006 quotes.

WORLD CUP WORDS OF WISDOM

Zinedine Zidane and Marco Materazzi

"I certainly didn't call him a terrorist; I am ignorant, I don't even know what an Islamic terrorist is; my only terrorist is her."
Marco Materrazi denies calling Zinedine Zidane names in the World Cup final, while revealing his bizarre pet name for his 10-month-old daughter.

"He's the future King of England and I've just done a dance for him - I think it's a bit surreal."
England striker Peter Crouch entertains Prince William with his 'Robokop' dance during a training session.

"For a game played in Cologne, that stunk."
Mark Lawrenson after sitting through 120 mind-numbing minutes of Switzerland v Ukraine.

"You can't play crap for five games and still expect to go through. But for 120,000 a week, they should be able to take ******* penalties."
Watford president Sir Elton John sums up the mood of the nation after England's exit to Portugal.

"If Brazil are the best team in the World Cup then I am Geri Halliwell."
Elton strikes again.

"I've got the passion but no idea of tactics - I'd be like a black Kevin Keegan."
Ian Wright stakes his claim for the England job.

"I'm not married to David Beckham - I'm not even engaged to him."
England coach Sven-Goran Eriksson on the relationship with his captain.

"The big man's back in town!"
How 5ft 10ins Wayne Rooney announced himself as he arrived back in Germany, following a positive scan on his injured foot.

"Wrighty, are you a fan of S&M?"
World Cup presenter Gary Lineker asks panellist Ian Wright for his views on Serbia & Montenegro.

George Galloway pretends to be a cat in Big Brother
When Galloway speaks, people listen

"I'm surprised at Tony Blair saying he was going to fly the St George's flag - I thought he would have been supporting America."
George Galloway gets his oar in.

"The world and his wife enjoy the Olympics but the world, the cook, the thief, his wife and her lover are totally consumed by the World Cup."
Broadcaster Nicky Campbell.

THE ASHES

"My focus is the next two Tests but then I'll sit back and have a couple of beers and smokes."
Shane Warne on his impending retirement.

"I'm a big believer that the coach is something you travel in to get to and from the game!"
Warne has a dig at Australia coach John Buchanan.

"That's a tough one, isn't it?"
Glenn McGrath when asked which England batsman had caused him most trouble over the years.

"I have prepared for the worst case scenario, but it could be even worse than that."
Monty Panesar on the abuse he could face in Australia.

Toilet
The search goes on for the toilet thief

"We've had the plans for the batsmen pinned up in the toilet area so you can read them when you're having a number two. When we find who nicked the plans we are stringing him up by his ding-dang-dos and we're chopping 'em off."
Matthew Hoggard reacts well to the news that England's bowling plans for Australia had found their way into enemy hands.

IAN HOLLOWAY SECTION

"I couldn't be more chuffed if I were a badger at the start of the mating season."
Holloway is quite pleased after QPR beat Cardiff.

"We have to look at that Luton game on Tuesday and try to win it because I was expecting at least three points from this game."
After Plymouth are beaten by Leeds.

"If I'd known this was going to happen I'd have got a bigger garden!"
On spending several weeks on 'gardening leave' from QPR.

"He's going to be what?! Oh for God's sake. Sir David Beckham? You're having a laugh. He's just a good footballer with a famous bird."
Reacting to the news that Beckham was being tipped for a knighthood.

Plymouth boss Ian Holloway
Ollie gosh - another quotable year

"We looked more like Queens Park Strangers out there."
Commenting on the five debutants he had playing against Leeds.

"Maybe they're just jealous that he's got a real nice tight one, with no cellulite or anything. I thought his bum cheeks looked very pert. If anybody's offended by that they ought to go and see the doctor."
On Joey Barton's bottom-baring antics.

"I watched Arsenal in the Champions League the other week playing some of the best football I've ever seen and yet they couldn't have scored in a brothel with two grand in their pockets!"
On Arsenal failing to take their chances.

BEST OF THE REST

"I not only like to have the TV and light on to help me sleep, but also a vacuum cleaner. Failing that, a fan or a hairdryer will do. I've ruined so many hairdryers by letting them burn out. So far I haven't set fire to anywhere."
Wayne Rooney reveals his strange habits in his autobiography My Story So Far.

"My dad used to referee me when I was a kid. I remember him booking me - and asking my name."
Coventry's Kevin Kyle.

If he was on fire I'd dial 998."
Notts County manager Steve Thompson talking about the referee after he sends off two players during their defeat at MK Dons.

"Before the match my daughter said: 'Beenie the horse wants to sit next to you by the drinks holder on the touchline'. It is difficult to tell a seven-year-old: 'This is the Premiership, I'm known as Psycho and I'm a hard man'."
Man City boss Stuart Pearce on the role a cuddly toy horse played in the defeat of West Ham.

"He's been in a different class in training and on the pitch. He's a lovely guy and if I had a daughter, I'd let him marry her. But I haven't got a daughter and he's already married, so there you go."
Terry Butcher about Sydney FC midfielder Robbie Middleby.

The Queen
One is not amused

"Football's a difficult business and aren't they prima donnas?"
The Queen gives her verdict on the beautiful game to Premier League chairman Sir David Richards.

"We'll see you in the second half for the next part of the Uriah Rennie show."
Stadium announcer at Deepdale has a swipe at the referee during the Preston-Palace game.

"I have not got accustomed to English life. The food is truly disastrous and it rains all the time."
Manchester United's French defender Patrice Evra is settling in well.

"I wouldn't say it's a must win, but it's definitely a game we need to win."
Peter Crouch on Football Focus discussing the Arsenal match.

"We probably wouldn't be allowed in the Premiership. I can't imagine they would let the likes of Manchester United and Chelsea come here. The ground would fit in the back gardens of some of their players!"
Colchester striker Jamie Cureton on their Premiership dream.

"Glenn Roeder has stood up all his life and he will always stay standing up whatever happens to him."
Glenn Roeder doesn't believe Glenn Roeder needs a rest.

"We were told the side an hour before kick-off and the lads looked round in astonishment when we kept the same team!"
Liverpool's Steven Gerrard on learning Rafa Benitez was to play an unchanged team for the first time in 99 matches.

Bondi beach and Blackpool beach
Bondi or Blackpool? You decide

"Australia's not all it's made out to be. I'd much rather be on Blackpool beach than Bondi beach."
GB rugby league star Leon Pryce.

"The man knows everything about you, what your parents' names are, your sister's name, your brother's name."
Phil Neville on Fergie's 20 years.

"People ask me about other clubs, but it is as if my wife is dying and you are asking me if I am thinking of going with another woman."
Sam Hammam on whether he'll invest in another club after reliquishing his majority shareholding at Cardiff City.

"I am enjoying being manager - except for Saturday afternoons."
Bournemouth manager Kevin Bond.

"I hope for his sake he has a long and illustrious career. But when he finds out what women are all about we'll see, won't we?"
Martin Adams questions whether new World Masters darts champion Michael van Gerwen, 17, will be able to stay focused on the bullseye as he gets older.

"He doesn't have to call me Big Sam!"
Bolton boss Sam Allardyce (6ft 3ins) on signing 6ft 9ins Yang Charpeng on loan.

"I sometimes put on my kids' Power Rangers outfits to chill out."
Trevor Sinclair admits some interesting habits on Radio One.

"I played for Clydebank 10 years and five stone ago."
Ex-Clydebank goalkeeper Gary Matthews on helping his current team Glenafton into the second round of the Scottish Junior Cup, at the expense of his former club.

Robbie Savage
Savage was conked out at the Riverside

"I got hit in the nose again - and with the size of my nose I'm surprised they didn't have to evacuate the Riverside!"
Robbie Savage gets a nosebleed at Middlesbrough.

"Is that how I look when I'm drunk?"
A sober (ish) Lee Westwood looks at his Ryder Cup team-mates as they celebrate during the mother of all parties.

"Guinness ability, that's why they picked me for the team, there was no other reason whatsoever."
Darren Clarke gets stuck into the Ryder Cup celebrations.

"This place hasn't changed since I was here as a player 21 years ago. The wallpaper is still the same in Tel's old office. It's got the same desk, the same leather chair he used. His wallet's not there, though!"
Newly-appointed QPR boss John Gregory reveals the spirit of Terry Venables lives on at Loftus Road.

"I come from the land of Mexican food - Arizona."
US Ryder Cup captain Tom Lehmann.

"People have been asking me what the Irish - in one word - will bring to the Ryder Cup... alcohol. And if I could just add something to that - plenty of it!"
Putts weren't the only thing Paul McGinley was sinking at the K Club.

Ashley Cole
Why does nobody like me?

"My worst fears were confirmed as Thierry and I sat in the centre circle after the final whistle. His name was sung from the rooftops, while my contribution was recognised by a deafening silence. It was like I was the invisible man."
Poor old Ashley Cole.

"They called me in for a drugs test afterwards. Perhaps they couldn't believe how I made that save when I'm 39."
Ed de Goey on the save that ensured Stoke victory over Walsall in the FA Cup.

"Last week I was so low I could have walked under a door with a top hat."
Ipswich manager Jim Magilton.

"I will never shut the door on David Beckham's international career. It will never be open... er, closed."
New England manager Steve McClaren believes David Beckham's England future is an open and shut case.

"Grimsby was a really bad place to live. The town was really old and there wasn't much to do there. It was full of fishermen and it smelled of fish all the time."
Brentford midfielder Thomas Pinault kicks up a stink over his spell with the Mariners.

"He must be amphibious."
Mark James at The Open after Sergio Garcia threw the ball to a person in the crowd with his left hand.

BANNER OF THE YEAR

"Premiership. Buy one get one free."
Spotted at Stamford Bridge.



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SEE ALSO
Quotes of the Year
29 Dec 06 |  Fun and Games
Funniest videos of the year
28 Dec 06 |  Fun and Games
Galloway 'cat' act sparks anger
13 Jan 06 |  UK Politics


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