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Last Updated: Monday, 4 September 2006, 12:03 GMT 13:03 UK
Quotes of the week
Roy Keane watches Sunderland
I've calmed down this much

Don't forget to send in the quotes we've missed using the postform.

"I'm aware as a manager I cannot go off the handle as much as I did, but if I feel something is not right I will look to nail it - just with a bit more subtlety."
New Sunderland boss Roy Keane on how his approach to management will differ - subtly - from his methods as a player.

"It's amazing when you do apologise - it's a relief to both sides. Will I apologise to Mick McCarthy? We'll see."
Keane says sorry to Niall Quinn - but will it be the hardest word when he comes face-to-face with his nemesis?

"Maybe I was football mad. Maybe psycho is probably too strong a word, but football means a lot to me. It was like an acting job. I would drive up to Old Trafford and turn into this mean machine."
Keane reveals his Jekyll and Hyde side.

"I had a reputation for being good in the air but I couldn't do much about that!"
Wales coach John Toshack makes light of the mid-air drama that saw the team's plane make an emergency landing after the cockpit windscreen shattered during their flight to the Czech Republic.

"At least it gave us something to talk about!"
Wales captain Ryan Giggs also sees the funny side.

"I had the Ryder Cup in bed with me - how great is that? I slept like a log and dreamt about Europe winning."
Colin Montgomerie on sleeping with the famous trophy after showing it off on stage during a Robbie Williams concert.

"I started boxing to get rid of my beer belly and my t**s that were hanging down to the floor."
Clinton Woods, who successfully defended his IBF world light-heavyweight crown against Glenn Johnson on Saturday.

David Hasselhoff
Volz is also a big Hoff fan

"I cycled to the stadium last Saturday for the Sheff United game - in my club suit!"
Fulham's eccentric defender Moritz Volz.

"Why should I care if he goes elsewhere? We do not really talk."
Reading striker Dave Kitson on want-away team-mate Steve Sidwell.

"Genius is never consistent, is it? Mediocrity is consistent, but genius cannot be consistent."
Portsmouth boss Harry Redknapp on striker Kanu after his two goals in the 4-0 demolition of Middlesbrough.

"I enjoy playing against the big men and I will just have to get the stepladder out and get on with it."
Wales defender James Collins on the prospect of marking 6ft 7in Czech Republic striker Jan Koller.

"The scoreboard says I have lost but what it doesn't say is what I have found... you have given me your shoulders to stand on to reach for my dreams. In my last 21 years I have found you and will take the memory of you for the rest of my life."
Andre Agassi delivers a retirement speech Hollywood would be proud of.

"Vamos!"
Fernando Gonzales reacts to taking the second set in his third round US Open match against Andy Murray. Sadly for the Chilean it was "Adios" three sets later.

Winston Churchill statue
Ladies and gentlemen, the President

"Towards the end you could see it was about to get a bit out of hand and I said to the ref to keep an eye on it. It helps to be bilingual I guess!"
German-speaking Owen Hargreaves helps the Austrian referee keep control of the England-Andorra game.

Question on BBC1's Test the Nation: "Who was Winston Churchill - A rapper, US President, The PM or King?"

Teddy Sheringham's girlfriend, Danielle Lloyd: "Wasn't he the first black president of America? There's a statue of him near me - that's black."

AND THOSE WE MISSED

"At this stage, no proceedings have been issued against Wayne Rooney, for various reasons - the book has got to be fully read and David Moyes has to consider whether that is something he wants to do."
David Moyes - obviously a man with better things to do than read Wayne Rooney's book! (Richard, UK).

"The strain on my groin from years of bashing balls around needed to be changed."
Jonny Wilkinson. (Well I thought it was funny anyway! Phil Thompson, England).

"That's about as plum as a rather large plum from a big plum tree in Plumshire."
Commentary on Cricinfo's website concerning Collingwood's dismissal LBW to Afridi in the 1st one day game. (Dave, Bristol, England).

"I never divide up the bearskin before the bear is shot."
Hearts chairman Vladimir Romanov when asked if he would make any signings before transfer deadline. (Conrad Edkins, England).

Miss World, Unnur Birna Vilhjalmsdottir of Iceland
Sorry, Arsene, not tonight

"Its like wanting to marry Miss World but she doesn't want you."
Arsene Wenger's on homesick striker Jose Antonio Reyes. (Kenny, London).

"It's plain to see that Rafa Benitez likes a big one up there."
David Pleat commenting on the signing of Dirk Kuyt shortly after Peter Crouch's winner against Maccabi Haifa. (Matthew Tickner, Wales).

"He's showing his humanity."
Lanny Wadkins at the WGC-NEC International Firestone, after Tiger's third successive bogey. (Terry Mackness, USA).

"I have known Meatloaf since he was a sausage roll."
Bruce Forsyth to Ant and Dec, on ITV's version of the Ryder Cup for C-list celebrities, the "All-Star Cup." (Leigh Marshall, UK).

Newcastle Chant of the Week - "You've only got one fan!"
Newcastle supporters chanting to the one person from Latvia who turned up for the Ventspils game at St James Park. (Rob Brotherton, England).

Newcastle Chant of the Week II - "The Zog on the Tyne is all mine, all mine - the Zog on the Tyne is all mine."
To Charles Nzogbia. (LP, Gateshead, England).



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