World Cup quotes of the week

It's good to be back

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"The big man's back in town!"
How 5ft 10ins Wayne Rooney announced himself as he arrived back in Germany, following a positive scan on his injured foot.

"Maybe if it rains England can win the World Cup!"
Paraguay striker Roque Santa Cruz has a mischievous dig at England's weather moans.

"Wrighty, are you a fan of S&M?"
World Cup presenter Gary Lineker asks panellist Ian Wright for his views on Serbia & Montenegro.

"We have a back four of players from Gillingham, Wrexham, New England Revolution and San Juan Jaboleth - heard of them?"
Trinidad & Tobago coach Leo Beenhakker revels in his side's shock draw with Sweden.

"We played a really good game."
Sweden coach Lars Lagerback was obviously watching a different game to the rest of us.

"The last say in this story is Rooney's and mine. I'm doing this in the best interests of Rooney, the England team and 40m England fans."
Sven gets tough with Manchester United.

"Question Time is being moved from Thursday to Wednesday next week because of the football. No comment on that. So we'll see you in Sheffield, Wednesday."
Question Time presenter David Dimbleby does his best not to mention football. Doh!

"Surrender! At last! For you, Blair, the culture war is over. Downing Street has run up the white flag - the one with the red cross on it."
Tory MP Boris Johnson upon learning the Prime Minister was going to fly the St George's flag from Downing Street.

Another catty remark from George

"I'm surprised at Tony Blair saying he was going to fly the St George's flag - I thought he would have been supporting America."
George Galloway gets his oar in - there's a surprise.

"We are a country of rivers, but we are football mad."
Alberto Pereira, of the Paraguayan Embassy in London.

"The world and his wife enjoy the Olympics but the world, the cook, the thief, his wife and her lover are totally consumed by the World Cup."
Broadcaster Nicky Campbell.

"The fact that Arsene Wenger took everybody to the Champions League final apart from Walcott says a lot. He even took the tea-lady."
Former Tottenham and Argentina star Ossie Ardiles is baffled by Sven-Goran Eriksson's selection of teenager Theo Walcott.

"Before the Paraguay game we'll all shake hands. At Madrid we all kiss each other before we go out. Against Jamaica, Aaron Lennon was waiting to replace me and as I approached I reached forward to kiss him, but then thought 'no, better not'."
David Beckham on the difference between English and Spanish customs.

"It would have been nice to have worked with some big egos...at the FA."
Martin O'Neill is not bitter about being overlooked for the England job.

HEADLINES OF THE WEEK:

"Tale of two tootsies."
Daily Mail headline over story about Wayne Rooney's foot and Victoria Beckham's bunion.

"Herr-dryer!"
The Mirror on the treatment Sir Alex Ferguson dished out to Sven-Goran Eriksson over the Rooney scan.

Have Your Say: Are there any funny quotes we've missed out?