Stuart fierce

By Derek 'Robbo' Robson The Tees Mouth

Pearce never used to be so emotional

At a time when football is dogged by diving Drogs and dodgy dealings, how refreshing to listen to a proper football man slagging off his charges.

Losing to Boro shouldn't be the end of the world, but Psycho's verbal assault on his under-achievers is a pleasant change.

I'm fed up of managers maintaining a Sven-like silence or just whingeing, Mourinho-style, that the ref denied you a perfectly good goal when it's plainly untrue.

English football needs Pearce and if he did get to run the national team at least you know there'll be no mealy-mouthing or bull********.

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Teddy Bears Up

Aah, the elixir of life

Amazing to think Teddy Sheringham was 33 when he won the Champions League on that bitter-sweet evening a while back.

Everyone's been banging on about what an intelligent footballer he is - and the smartest thing he's done is to carve himself a role which doesn't require any running about whatsoever. That is genius.

I've tried it meself. Sometimes I sit in the hole, sometimes I sit in front of the back door. But I always sit for at least a few minutes every game or I've had it.

Happy 40th, Teddy. It's downhill from now on, mate.

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The Stay Afloat Race

Yes! We've just won our degrees

When I heard there was every chance of a university boat crew drip-drying off Barnes Bridge on Sunday, I broke the habit of a lifetime and tuned in.

Cambridge did their best to oblige - they didn't even have some bits of old Tupperware to bale them out, let alone a pump to squeeze out all the bilge.

Of course, the whole event is a load of bilge. As if these are real students competing!

They must put an ad in Rowers Monthly or whatever the relevant publication is: 'Wanted: Olympic and World medallists to apply for PhDs in Jolly Boating, no reading skills required'.

I've told my lad, Darren (3 GCSE's), if he wants to get a degree he should pile down the gym and get on the rowing machine pronto.

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Tyred Out

Tyred out: Button's dreams go up in smoke

Poor Jenson Button! He can't get his tyres warm enough. Why let them all have different tyres in the first place, eh? Apart from the fact that the manufacturers get their logos plastered all over the shop.

Jenson's going to be test driving this week in order to sort out the problem for himself. Too bloody right! Go and buy your own tyres like the rest of us, mate.

In fact, it'd be really refreshing to see these millionaires get into the pits, climb out and change their own tyres, rather than rely on a posse of advertising hoardings in human form to do it for them.

I'd just love to see Michael Schumacher explaining that he would have won if he hadn't lost the plastic valve cap.

Sadly it's not going to happen. Too noisy, too wealthy, too dull.

Have Your Say: Do you agree with Robbo?