BBC SPORT Arabic Spanish Russian Chinese
BBCi NEWS   SPORT   WEATHER   WORLD SERVICE   A-Z INDEX    SEARCH 

BBC Sport
 You are in: Funny Old Game  
Sport Front Page
-------------------
Football
Cricket
Rugby Union
Rugby League
Tennis
Golf
Motorsport
Boxing
Athletics
Other Sports
-------------------
Special Events
-------------------
Sports Talk
-------------------
BBC Pundits
TV & Radio
Question of Sport
-------------------
Photo Galleries
Funny Old Game
-------------------
Around The UK: 
N Ireland
Scotland
Wales

BBC Sport Academy
BBC News
BBC Weather
SERVICES
-------------
LANGUAGES
EDITIONS

  Monday, 17 February, 2003, 13:54 GMT
Beckham's cutting edge

Never mind Manchester United, has anyone stopped to consider what effect David Beckham's gashed eye is going to have on the kids?

Everyone's going to want one.

Anyone walking in to school on Tuesday morning without at least half their face hanging off is going to be sent to Coventry quicker than Gary McAllister.

In the good old days, walking into the barbers and asking for a "Beckham" would have seen you transformed into the lovechild of Rod Stewart and Pauline Fowler.

EastEnders
Ooh, have you had a Beckham, Pauline?

Now your local neighbourhood Sweeney Todd will be sharpening his razor with a glint in his eye as he prepares to go to war with your eyebrow.

And don't feel sorry for Beckham during this whole silly saga.

Once the pain has died down and the stitches removed, he'll come out of this very nicely thank you.

There's the multi-million pound sponsorship deal with Band-aid for a start. "Mend it like Beckham", you can see it now.

And what about the Beckham action man, with eagle eyes and genuine scar? Throw in a Fergie doll and a football boot and you've got this year's number one Christmas toy.

Woolly

Let's be honest, Becks has probably been secretly craving a designer gangster scar to go with the shades and the trench coat.

He certainly made no attempt to hide the wound when he left for training on Monday.

And we are talking about the man who wears a woolly hat all year round - surely more than pure coincidence that he opts to go without on one of the coldest mornings of the year.

Finally we have the issue of one upmanship with the missus.

Spice Girls
Knocked off the top - again

The news that the Spice Girls were meeting up for tea and cakes at Beckingham Palace looked to have finally seen Victoria back in pole position.

Now she has been cruelly knocked off the front pages by The Cut.

It could almost have been a publicity stunt dreamed up by the Beckham camp.

Either way, Fergie won't lose any sleep.

In fact he'll probably be looking to get a copy of the incident on video - so he can teach Ryan Giggs how to shoot straight.

Click here for all the latest from the My Club section

News and Statistics

Match coverage

Daily club news
Links to more Funny Old Game stories are at the foot of the page.


 E-mail this story to a friend

Links to more Funny Old Game stories

© BBC ^^ Back to top

Sport Front Page | Football | Cricket | Rugby Union | Rugby League |
Tennis | Golf | Motorsport | Boxing | Athletics | Other Sports |
Special Events | Sports Talk | BBC Pundits | TV & Radio | Question of Sport |
Photo Galleries | Funny Old Game | N Ireland | Scotland | Wales