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banner Tuesday, 31 July, 2001, 09:20 GMT 10:20 UK
Armstrong's red letter day

BBC Sport Online columnist Derek 'Robbo' Robson praises Tour de France winner Lance Armstrong, but bemoans Phil Tufnell's absence from the England squad.

Armstrong Delivers

Bravo to the Texan string of p*** on another Tour de France victory.

Congratulations too to the US Postal Team. Can't imagine Chris Boardman doing so well supported by the GB Post Office.

Harry Enfield
The Post Office would not be ideal for British cycling
For one thing there'd be no chance of all the cyclists ending up in the same place at the end of the day.

Thin Spin

No Tuffers in the England squad? This season the Cockney sparra has put paid to those who said he had gone to pot and should be put out to grass, by producing some spliffing form (my boy Darren helped me with them puns).

Despite this, England have turned once again to the soft furry hand puppet that is Robert Croft.

His record on English soil is memorable - 13 wickets in 11 tests at 73.3 each. Remember those stats when the England boys are failing to exploit a turning pitch on the last day (i.e. Sunday).

Not such a bad Seoul

Saw a programme on Ben Johnson the other day. Not the brightest crayon in the box, was he?

Ben Johnson
Ben Johnson: The eyes have it
Even I thought he must be on something when he kept on turning up looking like he'd had a pneumatic pump turned on and shoved up his backside overnight.

Still, the programme reminded us all what a prissy, preening ponce Carl Lewis was.

For that reason only, it was good once again to see Johnson pelt down the track like the first ever entrant in a horizontal bungee contest.

Another Centenary, another kit

It is only right that Man Utd should be sporting a gold kit to celebrate 100 years as a football club.

But what was the excuse after years 97, 97 and a half, 98, 98 and a quarter et cetera et cetera?

Manchester United! You're not a football club, you're just a very big shop!

100% Colombian

All right, who thought Colombia WOULDN'T win the Copa America on home soil?

I'm saying nothing, although I'm sure if Maradona had been in the side there's no way Argentina would have boycotted such an opportunity.

Is Rod for real?

I've never known Rodney Marsh to back English cricket (except in Headingley in '81 when 500-1 proved too tempting for him).

Rodney Marsh
No, not that Rodney Marsh!
Of course Ramprakash hates the idea of our young cricketers being left in the hands of the old enemy.

But, Mark son, Marsh did a good job with many of the Aussies who are currently urinating on our brave boys from a great height.

Maybe that's why you're so upset - but we need Rod to take the p*** away if you get my meaning. HAVE YOUR SAY


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