Ahhh, the World Cup - glorious sunshine (outside of my London-based window), glorious samba football as Brazil turn on the style against Ivory Coast and a glorious red card for not doing very much at all for Kaka. So what does day 11 hold in store? Come and join the party with me, Pranav Soneji, for the next few hours as we prepare for North Korea v Portugal.

Over in Rustenburg, David James, his unruly locks reined in by a thick hairband, leaps athletically to his right as assistant goalkeeping coach Ray Clemence smashes a rather useful right-footed shot towards the bottom corner in England's training session in Rustenburg. Neither Ledley King (groin) or Michael Carrick (ankle) are taking part, but more intriguingly Joe Cole is wearing a bright fluorescent yellow bib, along with Wayne Rooney. Does that mean he will start against Slovenia? I have no idea.

I had the pleasure of watching Brazil in a venue full of jubilant Brazilians on Sunday evening - do they know how to celebrate a slightly dodgy handball goal. As a consequence, I now can't stop singing "sou Brasileiro, com muito orgulho". However, the Kaka dismissal slightly disturbed me, the World Cup had so far been simulation-free, but Kader Keita's antics at Soccer City have angered plenty, including Brazil coach Dunga. "The player who commits the foul escapes the yellow card, I have to congratulate him for that," he said after the 3-1 win.

"The most shameful episode in the history of our football" is how French football journalist Phillipe Auclair described the astonishing scenes played out at France's training session on Sunday in Knysna. Manager Raymond Domenech had to separate captain Patrice Evra and fitness coach Robert Duverne during a particularly heated argument, with the latter throwing what looked like his accreditation with abject disdain because a huge split in the camp following Nicolas Anelka was sent home for insulting Domenech. The French press, never backward when it comes to rubbing huge amounts of salt into the wounds, have been savage. "The Football Federation has created a farce; its froth is is just a stink bomb that keeps on exploding," said L'Equipe, while Le Parisien pulled no punches: "To have the worst soccer team at the World Cup was already unbearable. To also have the most stupid is intolerable." Ouch.

Over in Cape Town, North Korea, who impressed plenty in their 2-1 defeat by Brazil last week, are preparing to face Portugal for the second time in the competition's history. The first time was a little bit before my era but by all accounts, it was an absolute belter. If you have no idea what I'm on about, the two teams met in the 1966 World Cup (yeah, that one) quarter-finals when North Korea took a 3-0 lead, only for a Euesbio-inspired fightback which saw Portugal win the game 5-3 and book a semi-final place against England. The sight of goalkeepers without gloves has made me all giddy...

We're hearing reports that France have returned to training following the extraordinary scenes in Knysna on Sunday.  Makes England's internal situation look like a toddler's tantrum.

While Chris Bevan frantically searches a brolly in Cape Town, he grabbed BBC pundit and Fulham manager Roy Hodgson for a chat about the World Cup and all things Jabulani. Turns out Lionel Messi is at the top of the shopping list...

Over in Rustenburg, BBC Sports News Correspondent James Pearce has made a little video during England's training session this morning with John Terry "looking very relaxed indeed". The Chelsea captain had a very candid meeting with the press on Sunday, where he suggested the players were going to have an equally open chat with manager Fabio Capello about the issues which have reportedly caused a rift in the squad. This, according to who you believe and what you read, has resulted in Terry himself becoming isolated among team-mates unhappy with his comments to the media. Top cloak-and-dagger stuff this.

One man under the strain is Portugal manager Carlos Queiroz, whose team endured a 0-0 draw with Ivory Coast in their first match of Group G.  Playmaker Deco has been ruled out with a twisted hip (sounds like a 90s indie band to me) in training, so Tiago is likely to take his place while Simao looks likely to start ahead of Danny, who didn't exactly set the world alight in Portugal's first match. As for the North Koreans, looks like they are likely to start with the team that lost 2-1 to Brazil.  Meanwhile, their compatriots will watch the match live abroad for the first time in the country's history.

Over in Rustenburg, Frank Lampard is currently in situ with her Majesty's finest scribes, although the Chelsea midfielder is playing Chatham House rules by not revealing what was discussed in Sunday evening's "clear-the-air" meeting with Fabio Capello.  More to follow shortly...

Great reaction from Lampard when asked whether he was part of a rebel group of nine players. He laughed before responding: "I'm not a rebel, I've had my moments."  Hardly Night of the Long Knives stuff.

If Frank's diplomacy has left you thirsty for more mutinous prose, you're in for a treat now. World Cup winner and greatest footballer of the modern generation Zinedine Zidane has denied reports he advised France before their 2-0 defeat by Mexico."To think that I could call the players and tell them how to play - I mean, you have to be kidding me," he said. Baffling. I would hate to be the journalist that asked that question - imagine those green eyes staring back at you attempting to bore a hole the size of an orange through your head. Brrrrrrr...

Breaking news - Fabio Capello has told the BBC that Matthew Upson will start alongside John Terry at centre-back in place of the suspended Jamie Carragher against Slovenia on Wednesday. 

The teams have just come in for Portugal v North Korea, kicking off in 45 minutes. Portugal make four changes to the side that drew 0-0 with Ivory Coast. Tiago comes in for the injured Deco, while Danny, Liedson and Paulo Ferreira are dropped for Simao, Hugo Almeida and Miguel. North Korea are unchanged from the team that gave the Brazilians a fright in their opener.

Portugal: Eduardo, Bruno Alves, Miguel Brito, Ricardo Carvalho, Cristiano Ronaldo, Pedro Mendes, Hugo Almeida, Simao Sabrosa, Raul Meireles, Tiago, Fabio Coentrao.

North Korea: Ri Myong-guk, Cha Jong-hyok, Pak Nam-chol, Ri Kwang-chon, Ji Yun-nam, Hong Yong-jo, Mun In-guk, Pak Chol-jin, Ri Jun-il, An Yong-hak, Jong Tae-se

Right, time to hand over to Jonathan Stevenson in Soccer City, but I'll be back in the live text chair when the three-man attack force of Chile attempt to smash down the obdurate defensive doors of Switzerland at 15:00. See you on t'internet soon.

It’s certainly not a dull World Cup, is it? Welcome back to Johannesburg with Jonathan Stevenson - surely in this summer of shocks, North Korea can’t beat Portugal? Can they?

You don’t need a footballing history lesson from me to tell you these two have got World Cup history: and what history. On 23 July 1966, an astonishing quarter-final took place at Goodison Park between North Korea and Portugal. The Asian side raced into an incredible 3-0 lead, before Eusebio wrote his name in the history books with a foul-goal blast to send the Iberians into the semis, where they lost to England.

"Of course, Cristiano Ronaldo is a world renowned player who receives a lot of attention but in our case, in our game, we're not going to focus especially on one person. I'm not going to say I will have man-to-man defence. It might be needed... it will depend on how the game flows.”

“It is an extremely important game for us. It's all or nothing. The players know this and we all have the responsibility of knowing it is decisive for the final placings in our group. We are looking forward though with a great deal of ambition. We are only interested in winning."

The teams are out, so let's listen to A Portuguesa and Aegukka, the national anthems of Portugal and North Korea.

Jong Tae-Se closed his eyes and looked downwards, but there was a telling flicker of the eyelids. There is a man who simply cannot control the emotion he feels when he plays for his country. We're on the brink.

First sighter for Cristiano Ronaldo, who we can expect to shoot on sight today, especially in the wet conditions. He slams a hopeful left-foot shot in from 25 yards that takes a deflection on its way into the arms of Ri Myong-Guk.

Great chance this as the ball falls to Ricardo Carvalho inside the North Korea box, but on the turn he can only fire well over the bar.

Lovely stuff from North Korea as Jong Tae-Se helps the ball on from the left and right-back Cha Jong-hyok fizzes a 25-yard right-footer just wide of Eduardo's left--hand post.

North Korea have really come into this game in the last few minutes - in fact, they are the better side. Jong Tae-Se tries to control a pass inside the Portugal area, but just cannot reel the ball in. It's fascinating.

They could be leading, you know. Hong Yong-Jo smashes in a right-foot shot from an angle inside the Portugal area and after Eduardo parries it away, Mun In-Guk can only head the rebound over.

I think the Fifa world rankings committee should have an emergency meeting - there is no way North Korea are only the 105th best team on earth. Portugal are struggling as first Cristiano Ronaldo mis-controls the ball and then the heavily tattooed Raul Meireles can only run it out of play.

An Yong-Hak hits a left-foot daisy-cutter from just outside the Portugal box and it flashes a couple of yards wide of Eduardo's right-hand post, skipping off the sodden turf as it goes.

Raul Meireles has had a couple of pot-shots for Portugal from outside the box, but one flies wide and the next effort is deflected behind. They are struggling to break the North Korea defence down in Cape Town.

North Korea coach Kim Jong-Hun towels himself down in his technical area. I don't think it's quite got to half-time hairdryer stage yet...

Poor defending from An Yong-Hak as his scuffed clearance only finds Raul Meireles 15 yards out, but he screws this shot wide.

Hong Yong-Jo launches it goalwards and it smacks a jumping Ricardo Carvalho straight in the face. He's a bit groggy, but he'll be OK.

Portugal are doing most of the pressing right now, I think North Korea would be pretty happy to get in at half-time only 1-0 down at this stage. But they are far from out of it based on what we've seen so far. Cristiano Ronaldo shoots wide from an improbable angle on the left.

France trained today, in case you were wondering. Nearly half-time in Cape Town.

What a text. Thanks, Rachel. Any thoughts, anyone?

Haha. Rachel's text, below, has caused quite a stir. "Rachel for president" screams one punter, while lots more simply say "nah, England are just rubbish." A lot of people are asking for your number, Rachel, which I cannot condone. Portugal and North Korea are back under way in Cape Town.

Lively start as Portugal's Tiago hammers in a fine right-foot shot from 25 yards that Ri Myong-Guk has to be alert to tip over.

Up the other end and Hong Yong-Jo skims in a left-footer from just outside the Portugal box, but Eduardo gets down comfortably to make the save.

Cristiano Ronaldo hits an ambitious first-time right-foot shot from 25 yards, but it's plenty over the bar. Moments later his weak left-foot effort is fumbled by Ri Myong-Guk, whose defence helps him out.

Noth Korea work a free-kick quite nicely from the left-hand egde of the Portugal penalty area and Jong Tae-Se's low drive forces Eduardo to save low down to his right.

"There's no crisis right here, there's no crisis in the team and there's no need for a crisis."

This could end up as anything. Cristiano Ronaldo sends over another stunning low cross from the right and somehow at the back post Raul Meireles can only direct it wide with his left foot.

Cristiano Ronaldo keeps playing his team-mates in, but I wonder how desperate he is for a goal himself. It's 11 games since he scored for his country, in February 2009.

Fabulous. For team of the tournament left-back so far, you could do a lot worse than the terrific Fabio Coentrao. He surges down the flank, plays a smart one-two with his captain Cristiano Ronaldo and clips a shot just wide of the far post. At the other end, the still hard-working Jong Tae-Se heads over.

Portugal's appetite for goals is insatiable and they are still pouring forward at every opportunity in Cape Town. North Korea simply have no answer to their pace in attack, and on this evidence it looks like better teams might struggle against the Portuguese too.

No rest for the whizz-kid... Pranav Soneji has already started the build-up to Chile v Switzerland which kicks off in Port Elizabeth at 1500 BST. Why would we want any respite from what is becoming a terrific World Cup?

Seven-up Portugal have got us off to a stunning start to the day, so what can Chile v Switzerland and Spain v Honduras bring us? With a bit of luck I'll be in situ at Ellis Park to tell you what's going on tonight, so enjoy the rest of your day. Obrigado.