1800: PLAYER RATER
Michael Ballack is your main man for a very decent display today, while John Terry is a little under-rated in my opinion on 6.56. Alan Smith - he's not your most favourite Newcastle player is he? Blimey. Rate the players
"I might have an end of season lap of honour in the office next week." Rachel, Lincoln via text
1757: FULL-TIME - Newcastle 0-2 Chelsea
That's it, and the title will be decided - along with relegation - on the last day of the season. Chelsea have to beat Bolton at home and hope Man Utd slip up at Wigan to secure the Premier League trophy... stranger things have happened right?
1755: Michael Essien strides through on goal with just the keeper to beat, but Steve Harper comes out to block brilliantly and the chance goes awry.
1753: Four minutes of injury time to be played.
1752: Chelsea are knocking the ball around quite nicely as Newcastle sit off and prepare for their end-of-season lap of honour. So... erm... what's everyone having for tea?
1748: Yep, this game is over people. Newcastle bring N'Zogbia on, Chelsea replace Drogba with Shevchenko, but all anyone is doing is counting down the clock really.
1743: GOAL - Newcastle 0-2 Chelsea
Ooh, cracking effort that, Frank Lampard getting on the end of a neat Chelsea passing move and slipping Florent Malouda free in the box, the French winger making no mistake with his left-foot finish. That's the match, surely, and Manchester United will now know their title hopes will be decided on the final day.
1740: Ricardo Carvalho - the Chelsea lucky charm - receives some treatment for a back injury and then gets involved in a bizarre spat with captain John Terry, who apparently wants him to take the stretcher off rather than walk. Why can't they all just get along huh? Alex comes on to replace the Portugal defender.
"Chelsea's stupidity at that free-kick has got the crowd going, the Blues are suddenly sitting back and Newcastle are creating chances. It's game on." mickybobmanutd on 606 Join the debate on 606
1735: A rare thing as Michael Ballack has a pump from 30 yards and it's actually on target, Steve Harper stopping the stinger above his head well.
1734: Blimey, Newcastle waste two great chances in quick succession to equalise. First Obafemi Martins's drive is deflected inches wide and then Michael Owen fails to get on the end of Nicky Butt's pass in the box six yards out. Why have Chelsea retreated so much?
1732: What a palava. First Malouda is booked for not retreating 10 yards and then Geremi hits the wall with his second attempt. Anti-climax-tastic.
1730: A rare Newcastle free kick as a long hoof up the pitch finds Michael Owen, who earns a foul from Ricardo Carvalho. Can the Magpies snatch an equaliser against the run of play?
1728: Lampard does indeed come on, with Anelka the man to make for him. Looks like Essien will be pushed out onto the right, with Malouda on the left in a 4-5-1, but I'll keep you posted.
1727: A mistake by Jose Enrique looks to have let Anelka in, but the Frenchman's strike is deflected wide. Frank Lampard is warmed up and ready to come on.
"Looks like Grant is getting the best of Ballack, something else the Special one couldn't do...Now will he make Shevchenko blossom next season?" collie21 on 606
1725: Now, will that open things up? Newcastle will surely go for it a bit now, and Chelsea are pretty darn good on the counter. The Blues look to have immediately pushed Nicolas Anelka into a more central position...
1722: GOAL - Newcastle 0-1 Chelsea Michael Ballack scores and it has been coming. Didier Drogba dinks a free-kick into the box and Ballack, completely unmarked seven yards out, has the simple task of flicking his header home. Huge goal.
"I see a goal coming any minute now...lot's of pressure on the Newcastle defence now." Hustler on 606 Join the debate on 606
1716: Woodwork! John Terry steams onto Florent Malouda's corner but his header rockets off the bar and away. Huge escape for Newcastle.
1715: Bit better from Chelsea, Drogba flicking on Mikel's pass but Ballack is hustled out of it before he can pull the trigger. Corner given...
1712: Still scrappy at St James' as Chelsea defender Ricardo Carvalho throws himself at a corner but heads wide. Ooh, I've just seen Didier Drogba, I'd forgotten he was playing to be honest.
"Haha...Alan Smith?..Looks like Kev has a soft spot for Chelsea." I_met_Roman on 606
1708: Apparently Viduka got a kick on his Achilles. Joey Barton is going to run off his knee problem.
1707: Well, maybe it was Mark Viduka and not Joey Barton with the injury because it's the big Australian who makes way for Alan Smith at half-time for Newcastle. That's the only change of the half and we're back under way.
1700: Apparently Joey Barton has a slight knock on his knee, so Alan Smith is out doing warm-ups at St James' Park. Another ex-United player that'd be - Chelsea might want to pull their finger out a bit here.
"Re: 1644 - That's a bit unfair. Ji-Sung Park may not score loads of goals, but he's playing pretty well recently!" andy9xx on 606
"Chelsea have done what I said - cruised through the first half and now they will step up in the second half to win." PositiveSteve on 606 Join the debate on 606
1651: HALF TIME - Newcastle 0-0 Chelsea
1649: Beye takes aim from wide in the Chelsea box on the right. I don't need to tell you his shot has more danger of troubling a supporter than the goal. Drogba takes aim from further out at the Newcastle end seconds later. Again the ball comes down with snow on it. What on earth is going on with these people?
"Should season ticket holders take out insurance against injuries by Chelsea strike attempts?" Thanks A lot BBC7 on 606
1644: The shooting today has quite honestly been worse than park standard. Mikel is the latest to submit his effort for the upcoming 'worst shot ever' DVD (not available at any good retail outlets. Or bad ones for that matter), when he sends a 40-yard effort 692 rows back. Give or take a few hundred.
1641: Anelka has a poke at goal from 20 yards but it goes wide. Distinct lack of cutting edge up front on both sides at the moment.
1639: Awful from Ballack. Michael Essien drives at the box and slips the German in, but his first touch is bad enough 16 yards out, but his second sees his drive fly high, wide and not very handsome. Chelsea's best chance of the half, that.
1637: John Terry goes into the book for deliberately blocking Michael Owen's run after the diminutive striker sends the ball through his legs just inside the Chelsea half.
"Chelsea will win now. Newcastle won't have another chance like that." iBelongtoKaka on 606 Join the debate on 606
1633: So close! Newcastle go agonisingly close to taking the lead three times in five seconds. First Martins pulls down Enrique's pass 10 yards out but is denied a shot by Carvalho, then Mark Viduka brings a save from Petr Cech on the ground from the rebound, before Michael Owen looks to pounce on the subsequent spill only for John Terry to clear his shot off the line.
1630: Chelsea hint at a step up in gear as Nicolas Anelka cuts in from the right, but his left-foot shot is easily held by Toon keeper Harper.
1629: Hhmm, it's all very scrappy at the moment, Michael Essien the latest to try his luck from range - it's half decent but it flies wide with Steve Harper in the home goal comfortable.
1626: Habib Beye does his best to lose the ball over the stands with a 40-yard volleyed effort, but unfortunately it drops just short and is caught in the top tier.
"Sam, this is about the 20th time Martins has been linked with a move away from Newcastle, yet every time he states how happy he is. Why is this time any different?" Rees999 on 606
Because it meant I got to make that joke about Arsenal Rees999, that's all!
1622: It doesn't though, instead it spells r-u-b-b-i-s-h as Wayne Bridge's effort slams into the wall and Newcastle clear. Dum de dum...
1620: Free-kick to Chelsea 30 yards out and this could spell danger for Newcastle...
1617: It's promising from Habib Beye again down the right, but instead of picking out a Newcastle body in the box, he contrives to blast the ball so deep it almost goes out for a throw-in on the full. Shame.
"Exactly as I feared, Newcastle backing off too far when they lose the ball in midfield - showing too much respect? They'll get punished if they continue like that." hawick on 606 Join the debate on 606
1613: Reported Arsenal target Obafemi Martins beats three men superbly, but his shot is so tame Petr Cech can throw his skull cap on it. Decent play but nothing to show for it? He might fit in well at the Gunners you know...
1612: Chelsea forge their best opening of the match so far, Paulo Ferreira and Nicolas Anelka linking well on the right, but the latter's cross is headed miles wide of goal by Florent Malouda.
1609: Great chance for Newcastle, Nicky Butt getting the better of Mikel 30 yards out and dinking a delightful ball to Michael Owen free in the box, but the striker volleys tamely over. Should have done better.
1608: Michael Essien is hobbling about already after a meaty tackle on Nicky Butt. He should be able to run it off.
1605: Good energetic start from Newcastle who, as expected, are playing with abandon. Obafemi Martins gets a couple of nice early touches and maybe, just maybe, we are in for an open game after all...
1603: Aaaaaannnddd... we're off at St James' Park.
"Excellent work trawling up the Chelsea defeat to Spurs fella! For the record, I've not been down the pub, I've been staining decking. Rock and roll." Ben Lyon via text
Haha, cheers bruv! Now get down the boozer and have one for me...
"Chelsea have not won at Newcastle since 2001. There you go." Charlie at Heathrow via text
1555: Five minutes to go, now. Grab a beer, tea, soft drink or whatever and settle in for a crunch, crunch tie. London may be drenched in sunshine, but St James' Park is not. It's dry, though, and the play is sure to be hot, hot, hot. Oh dear... did I say that out loud? I do apologise.
"Why oh why aren't Joe Cole and Lampard in the team? Grant shouldn't disrupt the team that won against Man United and Liverpool!" (1999) Blues 5 V ManU 0 on 606 Join the debate on 606
"Having only just realsed this game is kicking off now, I can say goodbye to any revision I planned to do, this one will be a cracker." CambsSpur on 606
1548: Grant insists the team he has picked "will do their job, no problem," adding: "No team-talk is really necessary for this game". Keegan says the Magpies will "play for pride". I say, those of you expecting a goal-fest are possibly deluded.
"I work for a bank but I'm still stuck at work watching my keyboard gather dust... Here's hoping Keegan's boys can brighten up my afternoon." Jonny Brook, Man Utd fan, via text
I feel your pain Jonny.
1540: Apparently, Ricardo Carvalho hasn't been on the losing side for Chelsea in the league for 41 matches. Ber-limey! The last defeat? November 2006 at Tottenham.
1535: So a few surprises in Avram Grant's selection then huh? Five changes to the Chelsea side that reached the Champions League final, with Frank Lampard, Joe Cole, Ashley Cole, Claude Makelele and Salomon Kalou making way for Paulo Ferreira, Wayne Bridge, Mikel John Obi, Florent Malouda and Nicolas Anelka. For Newcastle, Abdoulaye Faye returns from a groin injury in place of David Edgar, but Keegan's side is otherwise unchanged from the draw at West Ham.
"I think Chelsea will be absolutely ruthless today and will pull off an inspirational performance. My prediction - Newcastle 0-4 Chelsea." Sakaria2 on 606
"Hopefully a good game with loads of goals. 5-4 to Newcastle please!" nufc_mcstueyb on 606
1521: Still, it's been quite the turnaround for Chelsea boss Avram Grant in recent weeks hasn't it? Defeats to Tottenham and Barnsley in the cup had people calling for his head just a little while ago but now, with wins over Man Utd, Arsenal and Liverpool behind him, a Champions League final place secured and their title challenge revived, the Baron Greenback lookalike can do no wrong. Fair play to him, I say...
Grant confident his job is safe
1514: Of course, today also provides you Newcastle fans with the chance to assess just who and where you want to improve your side next season. Chairman Chris Mort insists money is available... although you have to hope Spurs get out of the market sharp-ish given they keep pinching your prospected signings...
Newcastle pledge funds for Keegan
"Straeh (see below) - Cech would be more likely to score than Maka!!!" EddieNewton on 606
1508: Don't expect Newcastle to lie down, though. Kevin Keegan reckons today gives his side the "perfect chance to guage how far we've come against a top side," adding "there's plenty to play for".
Keegan relishes Chelsea contest
1505: So, in all fairness, can Chelsea still win the title? Joe Cole seems to think so, the midfielder saying: "If we can win and take it to the last Sunday then it is squeaky bum time as the famous man once said."
"Hopefully with the position Newcastle are in, they will come at us and it will be a high-scoring game and another three points for us. We just have to keep going and get the job done." Cole refuses to give up title bid
"Chelsea to win 9-0 today and then we'll beat Bolton 10-0... What goal difference? Hat-tricks from Pizzaro, Sidwell & Tal Ben Haim today, and seven from Cech and three from Makelele on Sunday." Straeh on 606
1502: By the way, don't forget to let me know your thoughts either via text on 81111 or on 606. You might get your name on the famed BBC website and become 'internet famous'. Oh the kudos... Join the debate on 606
1500: You know, lesser men than I might have been a touch disappointed travelling into work on this super fine Bank Holiday Monday.
Alright, the weather is undeniably glorious. Yes, all my mates are at one pub or another supping a cold one, staving off their hangovers in the sun with the hair of the dog. And yes, an ill-advised jaunt to a club after work last night means I'm a touch short on sleep.
But a quick glance at this afternoon's Premier League fixture and all concerns are wiped away. Sort of.
Newcastle-Chelsea? The top flight's reborn entertainers against the form team of the moment? And with the title at stake? Crikey.
All eyes - well, all eyes of Chelsea, Newcastle and Manchester United fans at least, are on this one. Defeat for the Blues will effectively hand United their 10th Premier League title, but victory will mean the two teams go into the last day level on points.
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