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By Caroline Cheese
1758: This Premier League season, as Darrell (see 1327) has discovered, is simply impossible to predict. Another 34 goals this weekend and no 0-0 draws. Don't miss MOTD2 at 2230 GMT on BBC Two. The Champions League - and Stevo - return in midweek. Ta ta.
Spurs boss Harry Redknapp after the 9-1 win over Wigan: "You don't get too many nines in the Premier League. I have got so much time and respect for their manager. I think he is a fantastic young manager and did some fantastic work at Swansea and now at Wigan. It is a bad day for him but he will come back from that even stronger and I am sure they will take it out on someone else."
1754: Stoke up to ninth with that hard-fought win. Portsmouth, who missed a first-half penalty, stay bottom with seven points, four adrift of safety.
BBC 5 live analyst Kevin Kilbane: "Portsmouth might feel a little hard done by, but Stoke came on strong in the second half and the substitutions made the difference."
1752: FULL-TIME Stoke 1-0 Portsmouth
1751: Seconds remaining at the Britannia Stadium and Portsmouth have one last chance to launch it - but Stoke clear.
1746: Andy Wilkinson brings the ball out of defence for Stoke. No challenge forthcoming, so he keeps going... and going... twisting and turning Mark Wilson before flashing a shot just over the bar. What a goal that would have been.
Wigan boss Roberto Martinez after the 9-1 thrashing by Spurs: "I am embarrassed, as it is a result we don't want to be associated with. In football you are going to win, draw and lose but it is the way we lost the game."
1741: Tottenham scored as many as Scotland - in
Back at the Britannia Stadium, Tuncay finally comes on to replace goalscorer Ricardo Fuller. Seven minutes remaining.
1738: Portsmouth throw on Danny Webber for Hayden Mullins. Time to throw caution to the wind. They deserve something out of this game.
1735: Portsmouth waste a chance to equalise through Kanu, and Stoke break quickly. Liam Lawrence sets up Mamady Sidibe, but he screws the shot hopelessly wide. Suddenly very lively, this game.
Stoke goal: Massive roar from the home fans as they see Tuncay stripped off and ready to come on - but they may not need him now. Lovely move from Stoke, Matthew Etherington exchanging a quick one-two with Dean Whitehead before immediately touching the ball on to Ricardo Fuller, who curls a right-foot finish low into the corner.
1732: GOAL Stoke 1-0 Portsmouth
From anon via text on 81111: "As an Ipswich fan I am outraged by the way cheating Wigan scored their goal. If it had been correctly disallowed then we would no longer be on our own as having the biggest defeat in Premiership history. I demand a replay!"
From Chris, Ruislip, via text on 81111: "Seven of Spurs' nine goals were scored by players that were playing for Pompey last season - little wonder they cannot score today!"
1724: My current favourite tweeter,
comedian David Schneider,
reports that Wigan have asked Fifa to make football a game of one half.
1722: Aruna Dindane allows Michael Brown's lofted pass to come over his shoulder before swinging his leg at the volley - but the ball flies just over the bar.
1721: What's up with Wigan then? This season, they've lost 4-0 at Portsmouth, 4-0 at Arsenal, 5-0 at home to Manchester United. And yet they've had some decent results - including that win over Chelsea. I don't know the answer. I just wondered if anyone else did.
From Kinnsy in Kent, via text on 81111: "Hi, I'm a Spurs season ticket holder, but couldn't go today cos I gotta fly to Glasgow for a course! One word... Gutted!"
1716: Tony Pulis makes a double change at the Britannia. Liam Lawrence and Mamady Sidibe replace Salif Diao and James Beattie.
From Anthony, jolly Spurs fan in Berlin, via text on 81111: "I think we should petition the Premier League for a replay after Scharner's handball. Maybe we can get 10 this time."
1713: Manchester United's 9-0 win over Ipswich in 1995 remains the biggest win in the Premier League - when Andy Cole scored his five goals. Newcastle hit eight without reply against Sheffield Wednesday in 1999, when Alan Shearer bagged five, including two penalties.
1710: Jamie O'Hara lets fly with his left foot. Terrific shot but Thomas Sorensen prevents it from creeping inside the post with a flying save.
From Baz, Wigan, via text on 81111: "As a Wigan fan this is the most embarrassing performance I can remember. Horrible."
1707: I reckon I sneezed as many times as Spurs scored in that second half. Still not complaining though. No sign of the changes that the Stoke fans are craving at the Britannia. Surely Tuncay might be able to unlock the Pompey defence?
1704: Stoke and Portsmouth kick off in the second half. Follow that.
1703: And Wigan's goal probably shouldn't have counted. Their goal difference is now minus 17, worse than any other team in the Premier League.
From Jack via text on 81111: "Sorry Arsenal fan here, surely a Spurs fan has hacked in to your live feed?"
1659: Think you must be delusional, Paul, they've actually gone and scored nine. That is Spurs' biggest ever top-flight win. Jermain Defoe joins Alan Shearer and Andy Cole as the only players to score five in a Premier League game. Incredible.
From Paul in Kent, via text on 81111: "Been ill in bed all weekend. Have I gone delusional in that time, or have Spurs really scored eight?"
1655: FULL-TIME Tottenham 9-1 Wigan
Tottenham goal: Wigan have completely gone to pieces - you won't be surprised to learn when you see that scoreline. Jermain Defoe picks up the ball on the right and the Wigan defence allow Niko Kranjcar to wander into the area completely unmarked. The Croat's ferocious shot comes off the underside of the bar to complete an awful day for Wigan.
1653: GOAL Tottenham 9-1 Wigan
Tottenham goal: "We want eight, we want eight," sing the delirious home fans - and David Bentley delivers. His curling free-kick smacks the corner of post and bar, hits Chris Kirland on the back and goes in for an own goal.
Tottenham goal: Seven for Tottenham, five for the brilliant Jermain Defoe. More calamitous defending from Wigan, Erik Edman making a hash of his attempted interception of Niko Kranjcar's pass. Defoe nips in to do the rest. Unbelievable.
1648: GOAL Tottenham 8-1 Wigan
1647: HALF-TIME Stoke 0-0 Portsmouth
1646: GOAL Tottenham 7-1 Wigan
From David at the Brit, via text on 81111: "Stoke fans want Lawrence, Whelan and the Tunc. Come on Pulis, pretend we are the home team!"
1638: Relief for Wigan. Aaron Lennon - who has scored one and set up three others - comes off to be replaced by David Bentley. Jermain Defoe's seven-minute hat-trick is only the second fastest in Premier League history. Robbie Fowler scored three in four minutes against Arsenal in 1994.
1636: Peter Crouch heads narrowly over the bar. Due to the goalfest at the Lane, my eyes have been diverted away from Stoke-Pompey, but I'm told I'm not missing much. Stoke have a free-kick - but James Beattie's lame effort bounces once before landing in James Ashdown's arms.
1631: That's the first time Jermain Defoe has scored four in a game. He's got plenty of time - about 20 minutes in fact - to bag a few more.
Tottenham goal: The Wigan defence are completely incapable of dealing with Jermain Defoe. Vedran Corluka has the ball on the right, Defoe points to where he wants it, Corluka provides the pass and the England striker dispatches it past Chris Kirkland. Spurs only need 10 more to overtake Arsenal now...
1629: GOAL Tottenham 6-1 Wigan
1627: Wigan boss Roberto Martinez makes a much-needed change, Hendry Thomas replaced by Jordi Gomez.
1627: Meanwhile, at the goal-shy Britannia Stadium, Portsmouth on top, but with nothing to show for it as yet.
Tottenham goal: Awful defending by Wigan. Peter Crouch holds off a couple of defenders on the edge of the box before playing in Aaron Lennon, whose run has gone completely unchecked. The winger slots the finish into the far corner for the goal his performance deserves.
1623: GOAL Tottenham 5-1 Wigan
Tottenham goal: Three-goal lead restored. Aaron Lennon pulls the ball back from the byeline for Jermain Defoe to volley in and complete a seven-minute hat-trick. That's the third hat-trick of his career. A hat-trick of hat-tricks, you might say.
Wigan goal: CONTROVERSY. Hugo Rodallega crosses from the left and Paul Scharner appears to control with his hand before beating Heurelho Gomes. "Booooo" go the Spurs fans. That should push Thierry Henry off the back pages. Probably not actually.
1618: GOAL Tottenham 4-1 Wigan
1616: GOAL Tottenham 3-1 Wigan
Tottenham goal Game over. Two goals in three minutes for Jermain Defoe. Wigan fail to cut out Wilson Palacios's through-ball and Defoe is on the end of it, confidently slotting it into the far corner. Spurs now need another 12 goals to above Arsenal on goal difference.
1613: GOAL Tottenham 3-0 Wigan
Tottenham goal: Spurs fans can breath a bit easier. Aaron Lennon is the provider again, whipping over a cross from the left for Jermain Defoe to power it into the roof of the net.
1611: GOAL Tottenham 2-0 Wigan
1609: Bouncing ball in the box and Rory Delap lashes at it wildly, almost taking Aruna Dindane's head off. Kevin Friend points to the spot, but Kevin-Prince Boateng's spot-kick is weak and Thomas Sorensen catches it.
1608: MISSED PENALTY (Portsmouth)
1607: PENALTY TO PORTSMOUTH
1607: Spurs midfielder Wilson Palacios catches Hugo Rodallega late and leaves the Colombian in some pain.
1605: And they resume at White Hart Lane.
Blackburn captain Ryan Nelsen on Allardyce's heart op: "It was a major shock to us, especially when we knew it was the heart. He's a big man so he must need a big ticker to keep him going. But it will take a lot to knock over that old elephant."
Blackburn midfielder David Dunn on manager Sam Allardyce's heart op: "We all wish him the best with his operation. Maybe he should stay away a little bit more."
From Jon, miserable Bolton fan, via text on 81111: "Megson for Scotland!"
1600: Stoke get the game under way at the Britannia Stadium.
1557: You may be wondering why Spurs-Wigan is kicking off today. It's because the clubs thought lots of their players might be involved in the World Cup play-offs in midweek so they agreed to the switch back in June.
1554: Tottenham fans should be enjoying the as-it-stands table, which has them fourth, three points ahead of Aston Villa in fifth.
1548: Spurs looked like they might run away with it, but they head in at half-time with a slender one-goal advantage - although Chris Kirkland kept it that way with a great save from Jermain Defoe just before the whistle.
1547: HALF-TIME Tottenham 1-0 Wigan
1544: David James has picked up a calf injury apparently, hence his replacement in the Portsmouth goal by Jamie Ashdown.
1543: Threatening run from Jermain Defoe, cutting in from the left and running across the edge of the box before slicing his shot rather disastrously high and wide.
1540: Tottenham dominated the early stages of this match, but they appear to have switched off. Wigan brush the woodwork again - this time through Charles N'Zogbia.
1538: Portsmouth boss Paul Hart is forced into a late change as Jamie Ashdown comes in for David James, who must have broken down in the warm-up. The 39-year-old has been troubled by a knee injury all season.
1534: TEAM NEWS Stoke v Portsmouth Stoke boss Tony Pulis makes two changes from the side that were beaten by Hull last time out. Andy Wilkinson comes in at right-back as Robert Huth moves across to central defence to cover for the suspended Abdoulaye Faye. Republic of Ireland midfielder Glenn Whelan drops to the bench after his exertions against France and he is replaced by Salif Diao. Portsmouth bring in defender Hermann Hreidarsson, midfielder Hayden Mullins and striker Kanu as Anthony Vanden Borre, Aaron Mokoena and Frederic Piquionne make way following the defeat by Blackburn just over two weeks ago.
1535: Niko Kranjcar plays in Jermain Defoe, who skips away from his marker and gets the shot in from a tricky angle. The ball skims off the woodwork. Might have come off the fingertips of Chris Kirkland - in which case, that's an excellent save.
1533: Robbie Keane goes for a jog up and down the touchline, and is greeted by warm applause from the home fans.
1532: Spurs keeper Heurelho Gomes bowls the ball out straight to a Wigan player - but he makes amends with a sharp save from Jason Scotland.
1526: Blackburn up to 11th, which might make Sam Allardyce feel a bit better as he waits to undergo heart surgery. Bolton, booed off the pitch today, stay 18th and in the drop zone. Over at the Lane, Tom Huddlestone hammers a shot just wide of the post and into the advertising hoardings. That stayed hit.
1524: FULL-TIME Bolton 0-2 Blackburn
1521: Wilson Palacios unleashes a swerving shot from distance, but former Wigan team-mate Chris Kirkland is equal to it, diving to his left to catch. Into added time at the Reebok.
1518: Ivan Klasnic spots a ball coming into the area, drops his marker, nicks it past Paul Robinson and shoots towards goal but Lars Jacobsen slides in to clear off the line.
1514: The home fans are turning on their own side now, booing as Jlloyd Samuel puts a pass straight out of play. That is now drowned out by the visiting fans' cheers for David Dunn as he is replaced by Vince Grella. Dunn has been outstanding today.
Tottenham goal: No surprise that Aaron Lennon, who has given former Spurs defender Erik Edman a torrid time so far, provides the cross from the right, with Peter Crouch applying the headed finish.
1510: GOAL Tottenham 1-0 Wigan
1509: Blackburn fans are giving Gary Megson the old "Sacked in the morning..." Bolton have conceded 11 goals in their last three games. And it could get worse.
1507: Peter Crouch heads over at the near post when he might have done better from Wilson Palacios' dinked right-wing cross. Spurs have started the better.
Blackburn goal: A more laughable goal you will not see this season. Brett Emerton swings over a hopeful ball and Jussi Jaaskelainen comes charging out of his area, but clearly doesn't tell Sam Ricketts, who heads it to where he thinks Jaaskelainen should be - only to see the ball drift into the net.
1503: GOAL Bolton 0-2 Blackburn
1501: Just as Spurs and Wigan kick off at White Hart Lane, Blackburn keeper Paul Robinson makes a brilliant save to keep out Matt Taylor's shot from the edge of the area. Looked like a deflection.
1500: Blackburn get in on the substitution act now and Benni McCarthy takes the place of Franco di Santo. Quite surprising. Thought Di Santo looked quite dangerous.
1459: And Gary Megson quickly makes his second and third changes. Chung-Yong Lee and Mark Davies come on for Gavin McCann and Ricardo Gardner.
1455: They really should be 2-0 up now. Shortly after Gavin McCann heads Jason Roberts' header off the line, Steven Nzonzi volleys over. Gary Megson makes that much-needed change replacing Johan Elmander with Ivan Klasnic.
1454: Blackburn starting to find gaps now, and they're threatening a second. David Dunn - by a mile the best player on the pitch - slips the pass through for Franco di Santo, who is one-on-one with the keeper but can't beat Jussi Jaaskelainen.
1452: Blackburn string together some nice passes in midfield before releasing Franco di Santo on the right, but he can't get control of the ball and the Bolton defence recovers.
1450: If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all.
1446: Nothing happening of interest. Time for Gary Megson to make some changes?
1443: Jlloyd Samuel provides an inswinging cross from the left for Kevin Davies to challenge for. The striker heads down, but the ball loops over the bar.
1439: Up the other end and Ricardo Gardner has a good chance - but shins the shot and the ball dribbles harmlessly behind.
1437: Blackburn so close - and again David Dunn is the creator, jinking past two defenders before crossing from the byeline, but El-Hadji Diouf's shot is headed off the line by Gavin McCann.
1434: Back under way at the Reebok.
From Kate_BT on Twitter:
"So glad that Lennon's back - we've really missed his creativity. Shame King can't join him - we're always shaky without him."
1429: TEAMS Tottenham v Wigan Tottenham skipper Robbie Keane is on the bench as he recovers from the Republic of Ireland's dramatic World Cup qualifying exit at the hands of France. Niko Kranjcar is brought into the starting line-up. Aaron Lennon returns after an ankle injury, replacing Jermaine Jenas, while Michael Dawson comes in for Ledley King, who has a hamstring problem. Wigan boss Roberto Martinez names the same team that drew with Fulham.
From Metaphor-mad Doug, Leyland, via text on 81111: "Re 1412: Hold on, Cheese! You claim Darrell's seeing the fickleness of fame, but YOU placed him on that perch in the first place! You're the kingmaker and chief of the coup! You handed him Excalibur, hung the sword of Damocles over his head, then watched him fall on his sword!"
1419: Pascal Chimbonda's handball gives Bolton a free-kick on the right just before half-time. Matt Taylor - of course - takes it and Paul Robinson has to tip it over the bar. From the corner, Taylor heads over when he should have done much better.
1416: HOTPOT! David Dunn and Fabrice Muamba are pushing and shoving and connecting heads without actually causing each other any damage. A yellow card for Muamba is the verdict.
1415: Matt Taylor picks up a silly booking for dissent. Seconds later, Ricardo Gardner shoots straight at team-mate Gary Cahill's, ahem, midriff. Nasty. Apparently.
1412: Darrell (see 1327) now experiencing the fickleness of fame as texters and
laugh at his 2-0 Bolton prediction. "Even Stevo would have done better," reads one cruel jibe. Oh no, that was me actually.
1408: Blackburn keeper Paul Robinson spots opposite number Jussi Jaaskelainen off his line and goes for goal from his own half. The Bolton keeper spots the danger though and scrambles back to collect.
1407: Gael Givet hasn't been able to run off that earlier injury and he is replaced by Lars Jacobsen in the Blackburn defence.
Blackburn goal: After Bolton hit the bar, Blackburn go straight up the other end and score. Jason Roberts lays the ball off to David Dunn, who takes it in his stride and curls a lovely finish into the top corner - although Jussi Jaaskelainen did get a hand to it. Bolton's record of not keeping a clean sheet this season continues - and Darrell's predicting powers (see 1327) have clearly deserted him.
1404: GOAL Bolton 0-1 Blackburn
1403: Matt Taylor's free-kick takes a huge deflection of Ryan Nelsen's outstretched leg and loops onto the bar.
1358: Does horse placenta work on colds, as someone on
has suggested? I'm willing to give it a go... if anyone's got any spare. Matt Taylor's cross from the left just eludes Ricardo Gardner's far-post head.
1354: David Dunn chases a high ball into the area and wins the aerial challenge. The ball goes over Jussi Jaaskelainen, but Gary Cahill is there to clear.
1351: Not much happening... so just time to tell you about a story I'm hoping and praying comes true:
Guus Hiddink to link up with Diego Maradona
to lead Argentina at the World Cup. "That would not be a bad idea, would it?" Hiddink said in an interview in his home country. No, Guus, it really wouldn't.
1347: Gael Givet needs treatment now after a challenge with Matt Taylor. He hobbles off for more attention.
1344: Now Matt Taylor has a great opportunity to put Bolton ahead. He escapes marker Gael Givet, tries to volley a dangerous cross from the left, misses it, and the ball comes off his inner thigh and actually hits Givet's arm. Half-shouts for handball but there was nothing the Blackburn defender could have done about that.
1341: A couple of minutes after putting a free-kick straight out of play, Matt Taylor now puts a cross straight out to hand Blackburn a goal kick. Radar a bit off for the Bolton midfielder.
1339: Franco di Santo has started brightly, the Blackburn striker running a long way infield from out left before seeing his shot well blocked by Andy O'Brien.
1335: David Dunn shoots wide. Not much else to add there.
1332: Bolton win a free-kick almost immediately and Matt Taylor launches it in the direction of Kevin Davies but the skipper can't get his foot on it.
1332: Off we go. Horrid weather in Reebok this afternoon.
1329: Don't be a stranger. I know you're as excited about this game as I am. Get in touch on 81111,606
Who knows? You could be the next Darrell...
1327: "The famous Darrell"? Someone's confident. He doesn't seem to think much of Blackburn. Big Sam is under doctor's orders not to watch today's game - so let's hope he's not reading the live text instead.
From Darrell via text on 81111: "Re 1315: Afternoon Caroline. It's me, the famous Darrell is back, I have got exact scores today. Bolton 2-0 Blackburn, Tottenham 1-0 Wigan, Stoke 3-1 Portsmouth."
1321: On the plus side for Rovers fans, they haven't lost at Bolton for eight matches. And Bolton have lost their last three games, shipping 13 goals.
1311: Blackburn boss Sam Allardyce, of course, misses the trip back to his old club
as he prepares to undergo heart surgery.
He did, though, pick today's team apparently. Assistant Neil McDonald is in the dug-out as Rovers attempt to stop a miserable run of 10 straight away defeats.
1307: TEAM NEWS Bolton v Blackburn Bolton make four changes from the side that was hammered by Aston Villa, bringing in Andrew O'Brien, Jlloyd Samuel, Gavin McCann and Johan Elmander for Paul Robinson, Zat Knight, Tamir Cohen and Chung-Yong Lee. Blackburn make just one change from the side that beat Portsmouth, with Jason Roberts coming in for Morten Gamst Pedersen.
1305: TEAMS Bolton v Blackburn Bolton: Jaaskelainen, Ricketts, Cahill, Andrew O'Brien, Samuel, Taylor, Muamba, McCann, Gardner, Elmander, Kevin Davies. Subs: Al Habsi, Knight, Steinsson, Mark Davies, Klasnic, Lee, Basham. Blackburn: Robinson, Chimbonda, Samba, Nelsen, Givet, Dunn, Nzonzi, Emerton, Diouf, Di Santo, Roberts. Subs: Brown, Jacobsen, McCarthy, Grella, Andrews, Kalinic, Salgado.
1300: Hello you. Nothing like a Lancashire hotpot to warm the soul on a grey Sunday, is there?
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