Newcastle 1-1 Arsenal
Everton 1-0 Zenit St Petersburg
GOALFLASHES AND MAJOR INCIDENTS (all times GMT)
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2153: A million thanks for the texts and 606 chat tonight. I've enjoyed myself - and not just because of the mulled wine. Special thanks to PlymJonnyDisco on 606 for wowing us with his predictions - although I fear we may have launched an ego. Still, I for one won't be ignoring his words of wisdom in the future. The ubiquitous Tim Lovejoy is on BBC Radio 5 Live's 606 tonight if you need to talk. He's on 0500 909 693 or text him on 85058. Ta ta.
2149: Tonight's wins for Atletico Madrid and Panathinaikos mean Aberdeen must win their final group game against Copenhagen on 20 December to be sure of qualifying for the last 32.
2145: Arsenal goalscorer Emmanuel Adebayor is still leading the way in Player Rater with 8.09. Newcastle's star man is Alan Smith on 6.33. Everton's man of the match - according to BBC Sport website users - is future England midfielder Mikel Arteta on 7.46. Still time for all that to change though...
2141: "Great job by the Toon tonight. Could easily say that we deserved to win, but I'll take the 1-1. And such an improved performance as well. I'm happy!"
captchris on 606
2139 FULL-TIME Newcastle 1-1 Arsenal
Applause all round St James' Park from the Newcastle fans as Steven Taylor's second-half goal earns them a battling point. Owner Mike Ashley is all smiles and the pressure lifts from Sam Allardyce. Arsenal stretch their lead at the top to four points.
2137: FULL-TIME Everton 1-0 Zenit St Petersburg
Tim Cahill's late goal earns Everton victory and means David Moyes' side will finish top of Group A and face one of the third-placed sides in the last 32.
2134: Newcastle have four corners in quick succession. The closest they come is when Nicky Butt heads the ball back for Steven Taylor but the goalscorer's close-range effort is deflected behind.
2132: No, PlymJonnyDisco (see 2037), this does not make you a modern-day Nostradamus. The 82nd minute does not constitute an early goal. I read that in the BBC guidelines.
2130: As it stands, Everton will qualify top of Group A regardless of the result in their last game against AZ. That's because Marek Mintal's late double has put Nuremburg 2-1 up against AZ.
2126: GOAL Everton 1-0 Zenit St Petersburg
Mikel Arteta takes the corner, Zenit keeper Mikhail Malafeev makes a good save from Joleon Lescott's powerful shot but Tim Cahill buries the rebound.
2125: Newcastle keeper Shay Given cuts out Tomas Rosicky's cross as Arsenal suddenly break.
2121: Midfielder Geremi comes off for Newcastle and is replaced by Mark Viduka. Alan Smith moves back into midfield but it looks like Sam Allardyce thinks this game is there to be won.
2120: Aberdeen update... Atletico Madrid are 2-0 up in Copenhagen, while Panathinaikos have taken a 2-0 lead over Lokomotiv Moscow. That's all good news for the Dons, who retain their hopes of qualifying but will have to win their last game.
2117: It's all getting a bit tasty at St James' Park and Sam Allardyce is loving it. The Magpies boss is on the touchline urging his players to get stuck in. I don't know how he kept the chewing gum in his mouth after that furious outburst.
2113: Eduardo will have to wait a bit more for his first Premier League goal. The Arsenal striker is replaced by Nicolas Bendtner.
2110: I reckon PlymJonnyDisco (see 2037) has lost his touch. We're 20 minutes into the second half so well out of the early goal territory.
2108: Alan Smith runs past Bacary Sagna and is a bit surprised to see the Arsenal defender collapse to the ground and roll over while holding his ankle. Yellow card for Sagna for diving.
2105: GOAL Newcastle 1-1 Arsenal
Eduardo loses the ball as Arsenal try to get the ball clear. Habib Beye crosses Alan Smith flicks on and local boy Steven Taylor turns and finishes low into the corner. Cue mayhem at St James' Park.
2104: The game at St James' has turned into a niggle-fest. Shay Given gets a yellow card after running about 60 yards to have a go at the referee. Silly.
2102: Atletico Madrid are currently 1-0 up in Denmark against Copenhagen, while Panathinaikos are 0-0 against Lokomotiv Moscow. That's good news for Aberdeen fans - if those scores stay the same, the Dons will retain a chance of qualifying for the knockout stages.
2059: Arsenal break with Tomas Rosicky and Emmanuel Adebayor but Newcastle's defence recover and rob Rosicky. The Arsenal duo then have a right go at each other, as Adeabayor tells his team-mate he should have released the ball.
2057: Konstantin Zyrianov spurns a golden chance to put Zenit ahead, blasting over the bar from the edge of the box with only Tim Howard to beat.
2053: Zenit striker Pavel Pogrebnyak races clear but Everton keeper Tim Howard makes a sharp save.
2052: Charles N'Zogbia's stinging shot is collected by Arsenal keeper Manuel Almunia. At Goodison, James McFadden breaks clear but after a mix-up with Andy Johnson, Zenit recover.
2050: Arsenal v Newcastle resumes.
2048: Zenit St Petersburg get the second-half under way at Goodison Park. They're still having their half-time teas at St James'.
2046: "Could we get that Plym guy (see 1954) to predict Newcastle to win please? We could do with three points."
Josh via text on 81111
2043: Arsenal goalscorer Emmanuel Adebayor is storming away with BBC Sport's interactive Player Rater. He's on 8.22, Newcastle midfielder Joey Barton brings up the rear on 5.25.
2037: "I feel a prediction coming on... Everton to score early in the second-half. Timmy Cahill. Don't know how, might be a screamer, might be a tap-in. If I'm right, I get an all expenses paid trip to Goodison to meet the players and Moyes. Who's paying?"
PlymJonnyDisco (Plymjock84) on 606
2034: HALF-TIME Newcastle 0-1 Arsenal
Emmanuel Adebayor's brilliant early volley puts Arsenal ahead - but Newcastle fans applaud their team from the field.
2033: HALF-TIME Everton 0-0 Zenit St Petersburg
An entertaining half ends goalless after Arteta's missed penalty.
2030: Zenit are down to nine men temporarily as Alejandro Dominguez is stretchered off following a tackle from Phil Neville. They're into added time at the end of the first-half.
2027: Newcastle midfielder Joey Barton barges into Arsenal's Gilberto. There's a bit of a melee, then Barton sees yellow and everyone calms down again.
2022: It's all going on. Steven Taylor's header comes back off the post at St James' Park and at Goodison, Lee Carsley's drilled low shot pings back off the bottom of the same post. Not actually the same post. You know what I mean.
2021: I think the problem is penalties are just too easy for Mikel Arteta. The soon-to-be England midfielder unleashes a stunning dipping shot from about 30 yards which the Zenit keeper does brilliantly to claw away from the top corner.
2020: "Arteta must be English if he can't take penalties!"
Sauve in Newark, via text on 81111
2018: AZ take the lead in Nuremburg in tonight's other Group A game through Demy De Zeeuw. If AZ hold on to the lead, then Everton will qualify tonight - win, lose or draw. However, on the flip side, it also means Everton cannot win the group tonight, even if they win this match.
2016: Dick Advocaat seems to have warmed up now. He's absolutely fuming about that sending-off.
2014: RED CARD Zenit St Petersburg
Nicolas Lombaerts gets his marching orders after blocking a shot from Tim Cahill. Replays show it probably hit his chest - and justice is done when Mikel Arteta blasts the penalty over the bar.
2012: Not much to report from Goodison Park where Zenit are competing well after a couple of early scares from Everton.
2010: Arsenal are finding so much space down the flanks, it's frightening. Sam Allardyce will surely have to address that.
2007: Zenit boss Dick Advocaat is all wrapped up in a coat and scarf and he still looks freezing - which is odd because a trip to Goodison Park from St Petersburg is surely the equivalent of a summer holiday. Isn't it?
2004: Lassana Diarra wins the ball in midfield and releases Emmanuel Adebayor, who skips past two challenges before Shay Given prevents the shot. The corner evades the Newcastle defence and ends up at Gilberto's feet but the Arsenal man can't get his shot on target.
2001: Newcastle have come back into it and are playing some neat football. You just sense that they are only a moment away from a defensive mix-up though.
1959: "So it's an England top I'll be wearing for a week then... Who's supplying me with the top? I'll even take pics, put it on my Facebook and link them to here to prove I did it. I'm changing my name to Jockstradamus."
PlymJonnyDisco (Plymjock84) on 606
1954: Now then, PlymJonnyDisco (Plymjock84) on 606 had this to say ahead of kick-off at St James' Park: "Arsenal to score in the first 10 mins, mistake by a defender and Adebayor to score... I'll wear an England shirt for a week if I'm right.. and you can hold me to that." And Newcastle left-back Charles N'Zogbia gave the ball away in the lead-up to Arsenal's goal...
1952: Geremi's header drifts wide as Newcastle look for an immediate reply.
1951: GOAL Newcastle 0-1 Arsenal
Emmanuel Eboue crosses from the right and Emmanuel Adebayor has time to control and volley a superb shot high into the net.
1950: "I'm a Newcastle fan. I'd settle for a decent performance. I don't mind if we lose, just don't get embarrassed. Oh and get behind the team and stop booing."
Toon Army via text on 81111
1947: Everton go so close. Mikel Arteta lifts the ball over the keeper but as it heads for the back of the net, a defender is on hand to clear. Time to start the 'Arteta for England' campaign again.
1947: Mike Ashley (in his Newcastle shirt) and Sam Allardyce are having a right old laugh up in the stands. That couldn't have been for the cameras could it? Anyway, we are go.
1945: The Uefa Cup game is under way.
1943: The teams are lining up at the Parks of St James and Goodison and we're nearly there.
1937: In his pre-match interview, Big Sam says he has told his players that no one expects them to get anything out of the game against Arsenal so they should "be relaxed but committed as a team". He also wants them to cut out the "silly mistakes". Easier said then done.
1933: "If Newcastle get a result tonight I'll proudly bare my backside in Woolworths."
Paul L in Chesterfield, via text on 81111
1931: Newly-crowned Russian champions Zenit St Petersburg field four players - Aleksandr Anyukov, Konstantin Zyrianov, Pavel Pogrebnyak and Andrei Arshavin - who were involved in their country's recent defeat of England.
1926: TEAM NEWS Newcastle v Arsenal
Newcastle defender Steven Taylor returns from injury to take the place of Abdoulaye Faye who picked up a calf problem against Blackburn. Arsenal duo Gilberto and Eduardo come in to the Gunners' starting line-up, replacing injured pair Mathieu Flamini and Alexander Hleb.
1924: "As much as any other Toon I'd love to see us whip Arsenal. Big Sam need not worry, with the form of the opposition being so good and our current run being what it is his job should not be under threat tonight. I believe in him, I'm sure the majority of us do, but the minority has the louder voice. Come on lads."
Graeme, Bourne, via text on 81111
1921: TEAM NEWS Everton v Zenit St Petersburg
Everton make four changes from the side that drew at Portsmouth, while keeper Tim Howard recovers from illness and plays. Leighton Baines replaces Nuno Valente, Phil Jagielka is in for Joseph Yobo in central defence. Andrew Johnson and James McFadden are paired in attack, with Yakubu and Leon Osman dropping down to the bench.
1920: Nick from Edinburgh makes it a cheese and wine hat-trick. Excellent.
1919: But what of Everton? They need a point tonight to be sure of making the last 32. If they win, and and AZ Alkmaar don't, they'll win the group - meaning they'll play one of the third-placed sides. If they lose, they still qualify as long as Nuremburg don't beat AZ Alkmaar.
1917: Great minds think alike. Nigel and Jack have both texted in a "cheese and wine" gag (see 1900 entry and, er, my name). Nice.
1912: What would Newcastle fans settle for tonight? Win only? Good performance? Gritty draw? Get on the text on 81111 or get over to 606.
1906: Here's Newcastle owner Mike Ashley on those rumours that Sam Allardyce could go if the Magpies lose: "I'll be at the game and there is nothing in the suggestion that it all comes to an end with Sam if we lose to Arsenal. That's nonsense."
1900: Welcome to the all-singing, all-dancing Premier League and Uefa Cup live text commentary. Now, I should confess I've just had a wee drop of mulled wine which could help or hinder my spelling of Zenit St Petersburg players. Let's see shall we?