Fourth Test, Barbados (day three, stumps):
West Indies 398-5 v England 600-6 declared
Ramnaresh Sarwan's imperious unbeaten 184 guided West Indies to 398-5, 202 behind after three days of the fourth Test against England in Barbados.
After Graeme Swann struck with his second ball and again before lunch, Sarwan and Shivnarine Chanderpaul put on 122, their seventh century stand.
Chanderpaul made 70 and Brendan Nash shared 53 with Sarwan, but both were controversially ousted after referrals.
Sarwan and Denesh Ramdin took their team within three of the follow-on.
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2143: Blimey, I feel like a man on the receiving end of a rabbit punch from Ricky Hatton, hopefully I'll be back to full mental fitness tomorrow from 1330 onwards. Until then, happy Saturday evenings all.
2140: Just heard from West Indies coach John Dyson, who was remarkably sanguine for a man who has seen his batsmen return to the pavilion by controversial referral decisions. Interestingly, it seems the players are just as unsure as we are about all this, which raises the possibility of both teams asking for the review system to be withdrawn for the final Test in Trinidad.
2133: Now that was a long day. Not what Alan Partridge might describe as liquid cricket, but enough drama and intrigue to keep one riveted. Although the headlines will invariably focus on the lbw referrals, take your hat off to a quite sensational innings from Ramnaresh Sarwan, who deserves to turn his 184 into a double ton as West Indies look to press on and exceed England's 600. Denesh Ramdin is unbeaten on 25.
DAY THREE CLOSE: WEST INDIES 398-5
2131: West Indies 398-5
Kevin Pietersen, who thankfully is wearing wraparound sunglasses rather than his spangly Elton John number from earlier in the day, throws a few grenades to Sarwan, who effortlessly glides a full-toss outside off stump to the cover boundary for four. The Guyanese latches on to a short delivery and cuts it down to the third man boundary for his second four of the over. And that's it for the day as Russell Tiffin removes the bails with the Windies three runs short of the follow-on target.
2126: West Indies 390-5
Sarwan moves to 176 with a pull down to fine leg for a single off the returning Ravi Bopara's skiddy medium pacers. The clock is nearing the 1730 local time cut-off time with four overs still to go for the day.
2122: West Indies 387-5
Stuart Broad looks like a man who nothing more right now than to curl up with the latest Harry Potter novel and a big bowl of steaming tomato soup. Instead, he sends down a tired long-hop for Denesh Ramdin to scythe for four through point for four, a boundary which takes him to 24 from 32 deliveries.
"Just to change the subject from umpire referrals (on which there seem to be as many different opinions as people). Has Sarwan become the new Chanderpaul for this series? The run of scores is amazing, and if Chanderpaul of 09 goes back to being Chanderpaul of 07-08, will England be able to get either them out in any of the next five tests to be played?"
Alok, Oxford via the TMS inbox
2117: West Indies 380-5
The Windies are 21 runs behind the follow-on target as Trinidadian Ramdin plods the singles off Swann alongside his senior colleague Sarwan, who has been imperious today. Hats off to him, especially with all the referrals chaos reverberating about all over the place.
"Re 2046 - if I nip across the river to the Kennington Oval and float one down, do you think I might have a good shout with Harper?" TC in Pimlico via Text 81111
2113: West Indies 377-5
Denesh Ramdin spanks a long-hop from Broad to the deep point boundary for four, lovely shot although the delivery got exactly what it deserved. Broad opts to go around the wicket, with a leg slip in place, and gets a ball to rise around Ramdin's kidneys, which only just evades the outstretched diving right hand of the bionic James Anderson close to the stumps. We have another 15 minutes of play as the shadows start to elongate around the Kensington Oval.
"Re 2046: The record number of LBW dismissals in an innings is seven in the England vs Zimbabwe match at Chester-le-street in 2003."
Mohammed, London via the TMS inbox
2108: West Indies 371-5
Brilliant scenes on the sidelines - a man clad in a black wetsuit and just executed a textbook double flip with pike (possibly) into the not-very-deep swimming pool at the Kensington Oval. Definitely 5.65 from me, although health and safety might want a word with stadium officials. Smart glovework from Tim Ambrose sees the Warwickshire keeper whip off the bails as Denesh Ramdin overbalances on the front foot. However, the Windies keeper just gets his back foot back inside the crease.
2103: West Indies 369-5
Stu Broad drops short and Ramdin rocks on to his back foot to pull through midwicket for two, although he opts to leave a similar delivery two balls later. An lbw decision is turned down by umpire Russell Tiffin, rightly so with a delivery falling down leg side. Hooray! No referral either as Ramdin clips a full delivery on leg stump down fine for a boundary behind wicketkeeper Tim Ambrose.
2059: West Indies 362-5
Swann fizzes in around the wicket, but drops short and wide outside off stump, allowing Sarwan to tuck in like a sumo wrestler at a sushi buffet with a cut through cover for four. A man in drag with what Beyonce would describe as "bootylicious" artificial backside jiggles and wiggles in that dancehall style so adored by Caribbean men, although they may be deterred by this particular individual.
2055: West Indies 357-5
Stu Broad is back into the attack and immediately draws Sarwan into a drive outside off stump, which he edges past Andrew Strauss at first slip into the vacant second slip region for a boundary. That's probably his first injudicious shot of the day, although you do have to ask questions about leaving huge gaps in the slips cordon. More interestingly we see the first signs of reverse swing as Sarwan guides a prod down to third man for a single.
2051: West Indies 352-5
A conga breaks out over by the beach, no doubt Daryl Harper would love to be in the middle of that rather than a cricketing controversy likely to have repercussions for the next few days at least. The 100th over, bowled by Swann, passes by without a referral as Sarwan moves to 156 from 249 deliveries.
2046: West Indies 351-5
Sidebottom gets one to skid low, but fortunately for Sarwan the ball pitched outside leg stump - plus he get some willow on to his pad too. Although with the way the referrals have gone today, you wouldn't rule out Alf Garnett picking up an lbw with a leg break pitching on the third strip at the Kensington Oval. Up comes the 350-mark as Denesh Ramdin clips a ball off his pads for a single. A photographer takes a pa-style shot of Alan Hurst's window for a glimpse of the Dyson/Hurst ding-dong about the referrals system.
"As an England fan, I really don't want to see us win a Test based on such awful umpiring. The referral system has to go." Phil, Ellesmere Port on Text 81111
"Are we on for some sort of leg-before record here? I can't remember a game where all the wickets in an innings were lb. Maybe I just have a bad memory/poor knowledge of cricklore."
John via the TMS inbox
2041: West Indies 346-5
Sarwan brings up his 150 with a sumptuous cover drive for four, but no showy bat-waving from the Guyanese star, instead it's head down for a single down to third man. Ramdin gets off the mark courtesy of a juicy full toss from Swann through wide mid-on for a boundary. No news on the rumble in match referee Alan Hurst's office as yet.
2036: West Indies 337-5
Ramnaresh Sarwan moves closer to 150, while new man Denesh Ramdin bats out the rest of Sidebottom's over.
"I think the best way to describe the referral system is to compare it to a cross between Ian Bell's ability to complete a big score, the English rugby union team's discipline and the band you can get to play a party on New Year's Eve for £50."
Darius Bradley via the TMS inbox
2026: West Indies 336-5 Wicket Brendan Nash lbw Swann 33
The lottery is back in action as Graeme Swann contests an lbw decision against Brendan Nash, an appeal turned down by umpire Aleem Dar. This actually looks like a better shout than any of the of the previous referrals. Lordy, Daryl Harper's only gone and given it - that's his five-for too - Geoff Boycott wonders if his name will go up on the honours' board for bowling endeavours. That's Graeme Swann's third lbw referred lbw dismissal. Hello, what's this? Windies coach John Dyson, accompanied by his team manager, is making his way to match referee Alan Hurst's office. To make matters worse, Hawk-eye suggests the ball would have bounced over the stumps. Remember, Daryl Harper does not have access to either Hawk-eye or Snickometer, but still...
2025: West Indies 334-4
Ryan Sidebottom gives Sarwan acres of room to free his arms outside off stump, allowing the centurion to cut down to third man for a boundary. His next delivery sees Sarwan rapped on his pads inside his crease, but Sidey's appeal is turned down by umpire Tiffin, a decision confirmed by Hawk-eye, which shows the ball clearly pitched outside off stump.
2016: Brendan Nash referral for a bat-pad catch & lbw
Brendan Nash prods forward to a ball around off stump as the ball flicks the pad and loops to slip, where Paul Collingwood takes the catch. An appeal is turned down by Aleem Dar, but England ask for the decision to be referred. it looks as if they are asking for both an lbw and catch, which seems a little cheeky. Umpire Daryl Harper, who has copped more flak than a war-time gunner today, concurs with his on-field colleague, which umpire Dar signals with a swift crossing of the hands. The right decision, thankfully. West Indies 330-4
2013: West Indies 329-4
Ryan Sidebottom offers Brendan Nash the opportunity to free his arms and scythe another upper cut down to the third man boundary for four, a stroke which takes him to 33. This is like watching some sort of medieval stand-off with neither side willing to concede an inch of territory.
"I'm trying to think of phrases to describe how I feel about this referral system. Unfortunately I can't send any of them in because they all make Gordon Ramsay sound like a saint."
Darren, Jamaica via the TMS inbox
2008: West Indies 325-4
After a lengthy drinks break play resumes, with Swann taking over from Stuart Broad at the Joel Garner End. No spectacular returns for Swann, who compiles a maiden with an additional leg-bye to prop the total up by one.
2001: West Indies 323-4
Nash is playing with the freedom of a top-order cavalier as he creams James Anderson through the covers to move to 28 from just 24 deliveries. No dogged-style resistance from the Aussie-raised left-hander. Pugnacious is a rather apt adjective to describe him.
1956: West Indies 318-4
A rank long-hop from Stuart Broad is given the full works by Brendan Nash, who whacks an upper cut into the stands by the deep point boundary for a big ol' six. Awful delivery though as Stu Broad hangs his head in shame. No hiding on the outfield sunny.
"Am I being paranoid or are the umpires going out of their way to show how stupid and unworkable the referral system is, so it will be scrapped asap?
Richard, Wareham via the TMS inbox
1947: West Indies 312-4
Jimmy A is still getting the ball to deviate in mid-flight from the Malcolm Marshall End, but Sarwan nonchalantly turns a ball off his hips down to fine leg for a simple single, with Nash adding one run with a push into the covers. So the Windies are now 88 runs short of the follow-on target.
"I'd like to speak in defence of the referral system. I think it's good to use technology to assist umpires and players if they think they've been hard done by. However, in this match the bloke looking at the replays seem to have no idea of how to implement the 'significant doubt' part to be able to overrule the on-field umpire. It's been wildly inconsistent but the blame in this case should lie at the door of the bloke in the TV van. Overall I think it's a good system but it needs refining."
William, Leicester via the TMS inbox
1947: West Indies 310-4
Nash is fortunate not to chop a Broad delivery onto his leg stump as his inside edge squirts away for a fine boundary towards fine leg. His next shot also goes for four, but this time with a classy punch off the back foot through the covers.
"Dare I say this referral system is utter rubbish. It's tailored for the third umpire to save face for the standing umpire instead of making the correct decision. Nonsense!"
Lloyd, Ipswich, Suffolk via Text 81111
1941: West Indies 302-4
Nash flicks a James Anderson delivery off his hips for a fine four to fine leg before thumping an attractive straight drive down the ground for three more. Sarwan then plays a Virender Sehwagesque upper cut over the third man boundary for six, a shot which turns the Kensington Oval volume knob to 11. Vic Marks on TMS suggests lbw decisions could go to a Eurovision-style judging system - would the Cypriots team up with the Greeks?
1935: West Indies 289-4
With his partner in runs back in the hutch after a 122-run fourth-wicket stand, Ramnaresh Sarwan continues his rich vein of off-side pickings as he unravels another beautiful off drive through the covers, before collecting a couple more to move to 131. The obstinate Brendan Nash is the new man at the crease.
"And another referral for LBW. Test cricket - the pinnacle of cricket or not? Relying on the third umpire referral is killing the dynamic of the game. Umpires can make mistakes but get on with it, we don't need this truly pointless system. I am losing the will to live."
Andy, Crewe, UK via the TMS inbox
: West Indies 282-4 Wicket Chanderpaul lbw Anderson 70
Chanderpaul injudiciously pads up to a straight ball and James Anderson has an lbw appeal upheld by umpire Russell Tiffin. But Chanderpaul immediately asks for the decision to be referred and having watched the replay, it looks as if the ball would have gone over the stumps after striking him on the thigh pad. But third umpire Daryl Harper incredibly agrees with Russell Tiffin - HOW? I really don't get this - that was not out, and quite clearly so. Shivnarine Chanderpaul walks back to the pavilion utterly dumbfounded, along with most people watching on television. A fine innings comes to a very controversial end, the fourth lbw decision in this innings and the Windies have lost their last chance to refer any more decisions.
1923: West Indies 277-3
My will to leave is slowly being zapped right now, Andy (below), I hear you after watching another Ryan Sidebottom of little threat.
"I've been following Test cricket for 30 years and never have I been as bored as I am now. What is the point of producing such flat pitches and as for the referral system..."
Andy, Crewe, UK via the TMS inbox
1919: West Indies 277-3
Anderson gets a ball to swing in late to Chanderpaul, who just about manages to chop his bat on the ball in a very ungainly and unattractive fashion into the covers. You have to feel the next six overs are England's best chance of cracking the six-inch concrete-like thickness of the Windies' fourth-wicket partnership.
Your comment about breadfruit (15:39) caught my eye. (Two cricketing similes in one sentence, by jove). Whilst breadfruit topped with crushed guayava is really up there (Costa Rica - 1996), it can in no way compare with sitting in a hollowed out tree (canoe?) in the middle of the Caribbean eating a pineapple which has just been hacked from the tree, "peeled" and sliced with a 3 foot machete and dipped into the salty brine over the gunwale before being feasted upon. (Dominican Republic - 1999)."
Graham in a miserable, wet and cloudy Barcelona via the TMS inbox
1915: West Indies 277-3
Ryan Sidebottom flirts with some nice swing, but can't quite calibrate his radar to pose anything remotely threatening to Chanderpaul. A leg-bye from the over, along with a stunted caught behind appeal from a delivery which brushes Sarwan's thigh pad.
"Even with these two still at the wicket WI could conceivably bat up to 750-plus by end of play tomorrow, then England will be in pressure situation to try and save this Test." bluenico70 on 606
CPS:LINK HREF="http://www.bbc.co.uk/dna/606/A48014589" STYLE="rightarrow">Have your say on 606
1909: West Indies 276-3
Jimmy Anderson - aka the Burnley Express - is handed the responsibility of making inroads with the new cherry. His third ball is unceremoniously thumped to the cover boundary off the back foot from Sarwan, a shot of cricket's finest deities. A similar shot sees him add two more runs, albeit courtesy of some shoddy fielding from Ravi Bopara, whose long barrier fails to stop a bobbling ball from bouncing over his thigh. No dramas with the new ball, although the last delivery threatened to wobble in the air.
"This is turning into a cracking game! Its going to come down to how well Sarwan and Shiv deal with the new ball. If they get through it I can see Sarwan getting his second double ton. If England can get these two out, they're laughing! I'm getting ready to go out but I'm considering not going as I want to follow the cricket. Enjoy!"
Hemal, London via the TMS inbox
1905: West Indies 270-3
Chanderpaul swats a Bopara loosener off his pads for a couple before adding a single with a languid flick off his pads. The Essex tyro concedes his third no-ball as Sarwan picks up another single. Shiv Chanderpaul is just 0.33 away from hitting a 50-run average in a 118-match career which has spanned 8345 runs.
1859: The players are out on the sun-drenched Kensington Oval and Ravi Bopara will bowl would I would imagine would be the final over - the 79th of the Windies' innings - before taking the second cherry, which is due at the start of the 80th over.
"Is anyone else getting annoyed with Ambrose shouting after every ball?! ONLY SHOUT WHEN IT'S CLOSE! Outside off stump with the ball nowhere near bat is nothing to get excited about!"
Gary, Edinburgh via the TMS inbox
TEA - WEST INDIES 265-3
1840: West Indies 265-3
Pietersen attempts to speed through six deliveries to squeeze in another over before the tea interval, but the Windies duo ensure that's not the case, with Chanderpaul cutting down to third man for a single, the final scoring shot in the second session of day three.
1837: West Indies 264-3
Gravy's now doing a handstand - the man must be well over 60, must have watched Breakdance II - Electric Boogaloo last night. Bopara concedes three from a largely unmemorable over with tea on the horizon.
"A taxi took us from Bridgetown to our hotel. On the way the driver pointed to a coconut tree without any fruit. 'That called a politician palm" said he. 'It gets higher and higher but it never produce nothing.'"
Nicolas via the TMS inbox
1834: West Indies 261-3
Kevin Pietersen and his sometimes underrated off-spinners are on for a joust as Chanderpaul takes a somewhat risky single to mid-on, but by the time Ravi Bopara hits the sticks, the left-hander is well within his ground at the non-strikers' end. About as exciting as a night out with Compo off Last of the Summer Wine right now. Antigua crowd favourite Gravy is in fine fettle among the Kensington Oval patrons, despite having retired from his rump-shaking antics recently.
1831: West Indies 259-3
It's all very easy out there right now as Ravi Bopara trundles in for his fourth over of the afternoon, conceding two no-balls as the Guyanese duo notch another 100-run partnership, with Chanderpaul contributing 59 while Sarwan chips in 35. Expensive over as the day reaches the point where the crowd start making their own entertainment.
"Just back after watching a very dull first half in the Rugby, was kinda hoping Chanderpaul had taken a rush of blood to the head and thrown his wicket away - who am I trying to kid, there is more chance of Red Rum winning this year's national!"
LillywhitePhoenix on 606
1826: West Indies 250-3
Sarwan brings up the 250 with a gentle flick off the pegs off Swann. Meanwhile, rugby fans from across the country are venting their anger at the poor fare on offer at Croke Park. Sounds about as free-flowing as congealed chip fat.
1821: West Indies 249-3
Classy, wristy artistry from Chanderpaul, who opens the face of his bat to guide a ball from Bopara down to third man for a boundary. The pair have put on 90 runs since Ryan Hinds' dismissal.
1818: West Indies 243-3
Nelson time, leg up David Shepherd as Sarwan cuts for two to move to 111. Former England coach Duncan Fletcher said the cut shot is Sarwan's release, deny him width to free his arms outside off stump and you are on your way to buying his wicket. But no sign of that discipline today.
"Dunno about Dogger, but we're getting Rockall out of this pitch!"
David, Spain via the TMS inbox
1815: West Indies 241-3
Big appeal from bowler Ravi Bopara and Tim Ambrose as Shivnarine Chanderpaul attempts to cut a delivery which cramps him for room, but umpire Aleem Dar is unmoved. Cue deliberations from Andrew Strauss, who is immediately prompted to get off the pitch by the Pakistani official, but the England captain does not opt for a referral. Does that mean the England players did not think Chanderpaul hit the ball, or they think the third umpire would only concur with his on-field colleague? Intriguing. The replays suggest there was no deviation in the ball's revolutions after passing the edge of the bat.
"On cricket tour some years ago, we nicknamed players after shipping areas. 'Dogger' was a good one as was 'Rockall' - he did 'Rockall'. We also made some new ones up to match some of the players. I remember 'Mackerel' being on of them. Perhaps some of your watchers can come up with some amusing new shipping area names (Because we certainly didn't)?"
Steven in Kuwait (still TMSing online, rugby onTV)
1810: West Indies 240-3
A few "boos" ring out around the Kensington Oval as Graeme Swann tosses six deliveries high and wide outside off stump as Chanderpaul opts to keep his bat well away from the red piece of stitched leather. Maiden over.
: West Indies 240-3
Ravi Bopara comes on for his first amble of the day and immediately sees Sarwan sneak a very sexy-looking single down the ground for a single, which Graeme Swann does well to keep down to just one. Chanders opens the face of his bat and guides the ball past the diving hand of Paul Collingwood at third slip for four, although I would imagine that was a little finer than he originally had imagined. A square cut for a single to deep point sees Chanderpaul score his 52nd Test half-century, a typically Chanderpaul innings scored in 80 balls, including nine fours.
1803: West Indies 234-3
We've had 69 overs with this ball and it is behaving like a model grade A student right now, little or no deviation and absolutely no misbehavings off the pitch. Maiden over from Swanny.
1800: West Indies 234-3
James Anderson is back on and he attempts to dig one in short, but Sarwan could have doffed his pipe and slippers on and still got his body behind the ball, the pitch is as easy paced as an Eastbourne bank queue. Both batsmen collect singles as the man next to me moans about how rubbish rugby union is after watching Ronan O'Gara spurn a penalty kick at Croke Park.
1756: West Indies 232-3
A fine sweep from Chanderpaul sees him collect two, while Sarwan merrily add a single with a cut off Graeme Swann. Those on Radio Four are transported into trade-winds heaven with the Shipping Forecast. Dogger is officially my favourite, which today is occasionally poor.
"We've had online journalism lectures on Twitter this year, our tutors love it. I paid £20 a lecture to learn about pointless 140 character 'life updates'. Utter, utter rubbish. Saying that, it could have been spent watching my beloved Grimsby play. Which is worse?"
Rob, Preston via Text 81111
1752: West Indies 229-3
More text-book drives from Chanderpaul through extra cover, but good fielding from Kevin Pietersen keeps the runs down to a single. However, the left-handed magician waves his orange-gripped wand and a beautiful dab which pierces the gap between third slip and gully for another boundary to move to 42 from 62 deliveries.
"Twitter is utterly pointless and offers no shred of substance to humanity. Completely my words!"
Rob, Hitchin via the TMS inbox
1742: West Indies 223-3
Sarwan, freed of the nervous 90s shackles, narrowly evades a diving Paul Collingwood at gully with a thickish outside edge from a drive, but the ball rolls away for his 11th boundary of his innings. We're still a mammoth 377 runs behind England's total though, but both batsmen might as well roll their trousers up, stick a knotted hanky on their heads and enter a knobbly knees contest, it feels like they're having the greatest day of their lives at the beach rather than putting together a 64-run partnership. Time to slosh all sorts of multi-coloured sports drinks.
: West Indies 219-3
Sarwan nudges a push into the on side off Swann for a risky single, but he makes his ground without too much fuss and is greeted to a chorus of applause from a very appreciative crowd. That's his 14th Test ton in 78 matches. Quality stuff from the 28-year-old. Wonder if he uses Twitter.
1734: West Indies 218-3
Ramnaresh Sarwan moves to within one run of his third hundred in as many Tests with a clip off the pads for a triple to a Sidebottom delivery which strays onto his pads. Bit quiet out there in 606, text 81111 and TMS inbox land. Let's start some sort of lively chat about why Twitter is utterly pointless and offers absolutely no shred of substance to humanity.
1730: West Indies 215-3
Wicketkeeper Tim Ambrose almost has his head knocked off by a delivery which spits and turns from the footmarks, only to see the next ball, pitching in a similar area as the previous delivery, bite his ankles. Just a single from the over and for TMS listeners, you will have noticed a technical glitch with the commentary, but with Kevin Howells magnificently holding the fort, we're now very much linked in with the Bridgtown crew.
1726: West Indies 214-3
Chanderpaul brings up the fourth-wicket 50 partnership with a dreamy straightish on-drive for four off Sidebottom before following that up with a mirror-image shot on the off-side, taking Shiv to 37.
1723: West Indies 206-3
Lots of texts from depressed Liverpool fans contemplating all sorts of not very advisable things. They could well be joined by England rugby fans as Martin Johnson's side take on a very exciting Irish team at Croke Park. You can follow the action with Rob Hodgetts:
Not too much to report on the cricket, just two singles - one each for Sarwan and Chanderpaul - from Swann's 19th over.
1719: West Indies 204-3
Sarwan brings up the Windies 200 with a glance off the returning Ryan Sidebottom to fine leg, which Stuart Broad does well to prevent a second run from being stolen. Meanwhile Sky commentator Mike Atherton's backside has broken his plastic chair, sparking scenes of schoolboy hooting and sniggering from colleagues Sir Ian Botham and Michael Holding. Chanderpaul gets on top of a shorter delivery and guides the ball down to third man for his fifth boundary, taking him to 28 off 42 deliveries.
1712: West Indies 199-3
For all you math fans (we've had an American theme today), the West Indies are 401 runs behind as Sarwan collects three runs from Swann's 18th over with a wristy cut and an open-faced off-side prod.
1709: West Indies 196-3
Sarwan moves into the 90s with a double and a single off Broad, who sees Chanderpaul watchfully play out the rest of the over with little bother. While all this is going on, bikinied ladies are playing an energetic game of beach volleyball on the perimeter, an encounter which has captured the imaginations of a sizable contingent of the ex-pat population at the Kensington Oval.
1704: West Indies 193-3
Chanderpaul, boasting an orange grip on his Gray-Nicolls bat, somehow manages to make room in his crease to hit a decent-looking Swann delivery through extra cover on his back foot for another boundary. Extraordinary shot. However, Swann entices Chanderpaul with a well-flighted delivery outside off stump which turns sharply in the footmarks, but the ball beats both Ambrose and Collingwood for four byes. Encouraging for the off-spinner though.
1700: West Indies 182-3
Plenty of gaps in the field, with Andrew Strauss deploying a sweeper - Ravi Bopara - on the off-side boundary. Sarwan dabs a Broad delivery into the vacant point area and ambles down the pitch for a single to move on to 86. Chanders then opens the face of his bat and guides a full delivery between point and gully for two more runs, a very deliberate and controlled stroke. The man has cunning coursing through his veins.
1656: West Indies 179-3
Chanderpaul delicately turns away a delivery off his front pad down fine to the boundary, with slip fielder Paul Collingwood in hot pursuit. The Sunderland fan loses his sunglasses in the process, but also manages to save a run as the Guyanese duo complete the third run.
1652: West Indies 175-3
More fluid off-side strokery, this time from Chanderpaul, who leans into a drive off Stuart Broad through extra cover for a boundary. No flourish, just a short check but the ball absolutely waltzes across the turf to the rope.
1648: West Indies 169-3
Sarwan greets Graeme Swann's first over with a perpendicular straight drive down the ground to long-on for a single, while Chanderpaul greedily rocks onto his back foot and pulls a ball just marginally short through midwicket for four. Shiv could not be more comfortable if he was sipping rum and coke sitting on a Chesterfield right now.
1644: West Indies 164-3
Ramnaresh Sarwan moves to 82 with an unconvincing drive down the ground off Broad, but nonetheless collects a single with ease. The sunshine-tinged long locks of Broad bounce away like a shampoo advert as he beats Chanderpaul outside off stump, although you can never tell with our Shiv whether he's playing at the ball or not.
1639: The players are out, no doubt suitably content after ingesting copious amounts of breadfruit and all sorts of other exotic-sounding edibles during the interval. Stuart Broad, England's most potent seamer in the morning session, to wang down the first over of the afternoon session.
"At the moment I'm listening to the cricket, watching Liverpool get beat online and have the Rugby on the TV in the background." James_Toneys_gut on 606
"Upon hitting the ball and tearing off down the crease, our token American player used to blindly fling his bat behind him with extraordinary violence, inevitably wiping out both his stumps and any unlucky fielders within range. The freshly concussed wicketkeeper would then have to gather up the widely dispersed and somewhat mangled wicket before play could continue. Having finally cured him of this habit, we look forward with glee to the consternation he will cause on returning to his collegiate baseball team in the States."
Chloe, still not writing her thesis, in Liverpool via the TMS inbox
1633: Just popped out to buy a birthday card, where I saw quite possibly the greatest combover I have ever seen in the Westfield Centre. Forget Bobby Charlton circa 1966, that bloke who played Rab C Nesbitt in that cigar advert from the 1980s or my own personal favourite, Bill Murray's in Kingpin, this would win all sorts of prizes. Any cricketers with world-class combovers?
Right, see you in 25 minutes. In the meantime, why not catch up with the Premier League live text or the Six Nations live text? Or why not listen in to Test Match Special's lunchtime menu?
"I had breadfruit (see 1539) in Sri Lanka a few years back. I watched a chap cutting it down and asked him what it was. 'Breadfruit' he said. 'What does it taste of?' I asked. 'Bread' he said. 'Thanks' I replied."
Neil in Ealing via the TMS inbox
LUNCH: WEST INDIES 163-3
1600: West Indies 163-3
Chanderpaul stoutly displays a straight bat as Graeme Swann probes away outside his off stump. The Guyanese wants to tuck into lunch with his pads on - and he successfully achieves his short-term goal as the 15 men trot off the pitch to the pavilion. Excellent session for England and in particular the persistent nagging accuracy of Graeme Swann, who pinned both left-handers lbw in very similar fashion.
1556: West Indies 163-3
Pietersen gets a couple of deliveries to grip, one of which Sarwan opts to leave, striking him on the thigh pad around middle stump. KP goes up as if someone has just seen Robert de Niro in Surbiton, but a shake of the head from Tim Ambrose prevents another referral decision. And a good choice to with Hawk-eye showing the ball sailing over the stumps.
1549: West Indies 159-3 Wicket Ryan Hinds lbw b Swann 15
Hinds plays with pad in front of bat, a dangerous tactic and once again Aleem Dar's finger is raised skywards, much to Hinds' apparent disgust. Sarwan looks towards the dressing room for referral guidance, but with Hinds trudging off towards the pavilion, it seems the Windies do not want to risk their one and only referral. Interestingly, Hawk-eye suggests the ball would only have clipped the top of leg stump. Lunch will taste that much more satisfying after that dismissal. Shivnarine Chanderpaul, the new man at the crease, caresses his first delivery of his 200th inning with a dreamy four through extra cover. West Indies 163-3
1549: West Indies 159-2
Kevin Pietersen comes on for a bowl wearing 1970s Elton John-style sunglasses, from the Saturday Night's Alright For Fighting era of spangly gold suits. Ryan Hinds turns Rocket Man and launches a thumping aerial drive straight back over Kaypee's head for four. The ex-England captain then drops short and Hinds tucks in with a cut through point for a single.
1545: West Indies 152-2
Ryan Hinds fends a perfectly straight ball down the pitch to Jimmy Anderson, who pings the ball straight back at the left-hander, who has to do some evasion tactics to prevent the ball from hitting his pads. Nothing untoward though and a largely uneventful over, which sees Sarwan collect another single, comes to an end.
1539: West Indies 151-2
So what's on offer at a Caribbean lunch? Curried goat? Ackee and saltfish? A crustless cucumber sandwich using chemically enhanced slabs of paper-white bread? The TMS crew were talking about breadfruit, something which brings back sweet memories of Panama's Caribbean coast eight years ago. Anyone ever dabbled? Sarwan moves to the 80s with two singles, while Hinds moves to eight with an additional run off Swanny.
1535: West Indies 148-2
There's a man that looks like Michael Moore in the crowd wearing an England shirt, albeit a Michael Moore with a severe gastric bypass. James Anderson goes through the motions, with Sarwan collecting a run to take him to 78 with a back-foot punched drive.
1531: West Indies 147-2
Hinds attempts a huge leg-side mooey off Swann, but only succeeds in just evading Alastair Cook, stood at bat-pad on the off side. The Essex man stood up too early, an error which meant he could not get down low for a potential catch. Sarwan does some stop-starting halfway down the track after a leg-side nurdle, but is comfortably home.
1527: West Indies 145-2
A couple of nudges off the hip sees Sarwan and Hinds pick up easy singles off James Anderson.
"Ref 1506: "'They keep throwing the bat down when they run because of the ground-in baseball teachings.' Exactly what I did the first time I tried to play cricket with a bunch of Indian and Pakistani guys in my dormitory when I was in law school. I smacked the ball somewhere around midwicket, took off to the other end, and realized when I got there that I didn't have a bat. You just automatically finish your motion by dropping the bat without thinking after so many years of training.
"The other thing (besides important technical points like a vertical rather than horizontal bat and so on) is that it's very hard to get used to the idea that you don't have to hit the ball forward. If, like me, you don't play cricket until you have reached adulthood, I think it's extremely difficult to 'unlearn' baseball habits."
AmsterdamYank on 606
1524: West Indies 143-2
Sarwan adds a single off Swann, who sees Ryan Hinds play an unattractive aerial swipe just past mid-on for his first boundary of the day. Not one from the Sarwan school of aesthetics.
1520: West Indies 138-2
Two men dressed as the 118 blokes, part of a sizeable British ex-pat contingent at the Kensington Oval, look very smug jiggling up and down as James Anderson rolls in to Ryan Hinds, who is content to let the over go without playing an attacking stroke.
1516: West Indies 138-2
Sarwan moves into the 70s with a lovely leg-side swing of the blade through the leg-side for six over deep midwicket off Swann. He follows that stroke up with yet another cover-driven boundary, this time all along the carpet. The man from Wakenaam Island is in some serious form right now.
1512: West Indies 128-2
Sarwan finally gets the Windies total running again since Smith's dismissal, spanking another dreamy cover drive, this time off James Anderson, for four. Ryan Hinds gets off the mark with a pull shot for a single.
1508: West Indies 121-2
Ryan Hinds cannot get off the mark as Graeme Swann pins him inside his crease. No real turn for the Notts tweaker though.
1506: West Indies 121-2
James Anderson comes on for his first burst of the day, but nothing to worry Ramnaresh Sarwan, who sees off the over without too much bother. Of more interest is the fall-out of the referral system. Personally, I'm against it - mainly because of the ice age it takes from referring to executing a decision. If they are to persevere with this, then I would suggest some rugby league-style countdown ticker where a decision must be made within two minutes. Rant over.
"Andy in Rochester NH (see 1418) is not alone in his situation. I live in Arundel Maine and I too miss cricket, am from England and your cricket commentary is my only link to cricket. However, I met a man once who told me that he (also a Brit) teaches Americans to play cricket in Wells Maine, he says they are ok but that they keep throwing the bat down when they run because of the ground-in baseball teachings."
Dean via the TMS inbox
1452: Wicket - West Indies 121-2 Smith lbw b Swann 55
Graeme Swann comes on for his first joust of the day and goes around the wicket to Devon Smith. His second ball sees an almighty lbw appeal, which umpire Aleem Dar upholds. Smith wanders off, but after a brief consolation with Sarwan the decision is referred to third umpire Daryl Harper. The ball hits the left-hander in line, but is it bat before pad, is it outside the line of off stump? After another age of deliberation - which prompts a slow-hands clap - umpire Harper concurs with on-field colleague Dar, who raises his right hand for the second time. Out comes new man Ryan Hinds, who plays out the next four balls without too much bother.
1450: West Indies 121-1
More hostile missiles from Stuart Broad, who pitches probably about one of his six deliveries inside Sarwan's half of this batting heaven of a road. Good thinking from the Notts man, who goes around the wicket to close down the Guyanese's options, but Sarwan has been in a fight like this before and casually sways and shimmies to bat out a maiden over.
1446: West Indies 121-1
Wondrous front-foot magic from Sarwan, who leans on a drive through the covers for four off Sidebottom. The lank-haired seamer sees Devon Smith play the first genuine play and miss of the day with a ball too close to cut. Cue lots of O-shaped mouths from the bowler and the slip cordon.
1442: West Indies 116-1
Smith unleashes a back-foot pull to another testing Broad delivery, but rather like Alastair Cook's demise on Thursday, he gets the ball a little too high on the bat, resulting in the ball looping in the air. But once again fortune favours the home side as the cherry sails over midwicket for two runs. Stuart Broad looks like someone has just stolen the last croissant he had been eyeing on the breakfast buffet.
"Devon Murray who plays Seamus Finnegan in the Harry Potter movies could magic up a ton on that wicket...maybe."
Emma in Bucks via Text 81111
1437: West Indies 113-1
Devon Smith reaches his half-century with a thick outside edge off Ryan Sidebottom which would have gone straight down second slip's throat...had a second slip been in place, you get the idea now. Streaky, but Smith doesn't really care how they come as he brings up his fourth Test 50.
1433: West Indies 109-1
Stuart Broad is very unlucky. He's mixing his deliveries up like a short-sighted postman and forces Sarwan to loop a shortish delivery to where a short leg would have been placed had Andrew Strauss opted to field a short leg. Two singles from a useful over.
A missive from friends in Germany: "We play cricket at the Stuttgart University of all places. We actually attract a crowd (even double figures sometimes)."
Ali, Stuttgart via the TMS inbox
Ben Hilfenhaus, making his Test debut in Johannesburg, I think has very strong German blood. Albeit via Tasmania.
1428: West Indies 107-1
Devon Smith scythes a short and wide Sidebottom delivery about 30 foot over gully's head and down to the vacant deep backward point boundary for four very safe runs. Did anyone ever play that shot in Test cricket before Virender Sehwag made his debut?
"Although I hope England get 20 wickets - I wonder what Chanderpaul will be like on this track if he gets settled! Thats if England manage to take 20 wickets!"
Al in Galicia via the TMS inbox
Do you pronounce Galicia with a "th" replacing the "c", Al?
1422: West Indies 102-1
Broad bangs one in short which Devon Smith momentarily thinks about rocking onto the back foot to hook, but judiciously opts to leave the ball, which thumps into the gauntlets of Tim Ambrose. Maiden over.
"Sarwan is in cracking form, but if England get him I can see Hinds and Smith watching Chanderpaul and Nash very soon after."
Pickles91 on 606
1418: West Indies 102-1
Devon Smith takes the Windies into three figures in decidedly dodgy fashion with a thick inside edge off Ryan Sidebottom which squirts past his off stump, down to the boundary for four very streaky runs.
"See 1355: I'm a Brit abroad, going through withdrawal symptoms because your text is the only link to the cricket I have, and I saw this in my local library here in snowy Rochester New Hampshire USA.....is it worth getting? Up here cricket is treated as an object of novelty/curiosity. Needless to say I take great delight in adding to the confusion and I may refer to it as a reference or instruction manual!"
Dispatch Andy via the TMS inbox
Get involved Andy, you may even find yourself a local cricket club. Check out the advice of John Gamgee: "I read Netherland a few months ago. Lovely novel. Great for all cricket lovers and sensitive Angst-ridden souls, of whom I am one."
1412: West Indies 97-1
Another front-foot punch from Sarwan is pounced upon by James Anderson at mid-off, saving at least two runs, but the batting duo run through for a single which brings up the former captain's half-century, his 32nd of his Test career. Devon nicks the strike with a well-judged single off the last delivery of the over.
1408: West Indies 95-1
I have more than an ounce of sympathy for Ryan Sidebottom, who has as much chance of swinging this ball as I have of romancing Penelope Cruz and Scarlett Johansson like Javier Bardem (who thankfully opted not to keep that barnet from No Country For Old Men) in that Barcelona film. Two simple singles and it's a cakewalk for the Windies duo.
"I'd go for Devon, the rather attractive woman who worked with Jack Killian (Gary Cole) in late '80s US TV drama 'Midnight Caller'. Or Bristol Rovers striking legend Devon White."
BBC Sport's Danny the Stat not doing his statty work. Back to work Ted.
"How about Curtley Ambrosia Devon custard?"
Dom in Liverpool via Text 81111
1404: West Indies 93-1
Broad digs a short delivery in outside off stump, but Sarwan rides the bounce and guides the ball down to the vacant third man area for a well-controlled boundary. He follows that up with a square drive of MCC text-book perfection through cover point for four more. This pitch is flat as the contents of a London fashion week catwalk runway.
"Devon King - who was the radio boss in Midnight Caller in the 80s. How sad is it I remember that???"
J in Leics via the TMS inbox
1359: Various black, white, pink and salmon-burst colours dot the crowd as the players wander out to yet another picture-perfect day in Barbados, with Stuart Broad set to bowl the first over of the day to Sarwan.
1355: Ramnaresh Sarwan is fast becoming the Caribbean's equivalent of Superglue - adhesive and extremely effective, as long as you don't get him on your fingers. Sarwan is from Guyana, the same country where one of the main protagonists is from in the book I'm currently reading, Joseph O'Neill's Netherland. It's loosely based on cricket in New York and I'm about 150 pages in and loving it. Anyone else had a go? Please don't tell me what happens.
"On that wicket Devon Loch (see 1335) would have got close to a century, though I suspect like Cook and Collingwood he might have fallen just short."
Paul in Lancs via the TMS inbox
: "If England win the Test match with four bowlers then I take my hat off to them."
TMS summariser Sir Geoff Boycott
1343: We're got a sporting smorgasbord going on this afternoon, with Premier League footy and Six Nations rugger on offer. Our lovely Cheese - one of the features of a typical Scandinavian food platter - is on the case with the football right now:
Meanwhile Rob Hodgetts is the keyboard basher for this afternoon's Six Nations matches in Dublin and Edinburgh.
1338: It's all going on at the Wanderers right now as Australia opt against enforcing the follow-on as South Africa are dismissed for 220. Has making the opposition bat again become the cricket equivalent of Angel Delight? As in, everyone used to do it in the 80s but it's far too embarrassing nowadays?
1335: Hello. Is it me you're looking for? Read a great comment from someone on 606 yesterday who proclaimed: "Devon Smith could get himself a century on this wicket, even Devon Malcolm might if we had drafted him in."
Which made me ponder - what other Devons could feasibly bash out a ton at the Kensington Oval? The only one I can think of is the bloke who was Michael Knight's boss in Knight Rider, you know, the bloke who lived in that massive juggernaut which could conveniently appear driving down a deserted Montana highway with red-misted mountains in the back. Anyone else? Your tools today - the TMS inbox, Text 81111 and 606. Let me have it.