THIRD ONE-DAY INTERNATIONAL, Bristol:
New Zealand 182 (50 overs) bt England 160 (46.2 overs) by 22 runs
New Zealand have won the third one-day international against England by 22 runs in Bristol to level the series 1-1 with two matches to play.
Having been put in to bat New Zealand were all out for 182, Grant Elliott hitting his maiden one-day fifty and Kyle Mills smashing 47.
England got off to a torrid start and collapsed from to 62-2 to 64-6.
Paul Collingwood (34) and Graeme Swann (29) put on 64 for the seventh wicket but it was not enough.
LATEST ACTION (ALL TIMES BST)
1841: I'm not sure if many neutrals are reading this, but I reckon we had a very good day's cricket - whatever the failings of certain players, and shame on the weather forecasters who predicted light rain throughout the day. Ben Dirs will be back in this chair for the fourth ODI at The Oval, and I hope you'll all join him then.
Before then, I'd heartily recommend following the build-up to tonight's Euro 2008 quarter-final between the Netherlands and Russia, courtesy of Miss Caroline Cheese. Take care of yourselves - and each other - and have a good weekend.
LIVE TEXT: Euro 2008 build-up with Caroline Cheese
"How on earth did we lose that?"
GraymeadYNWA on 606
Join the debate on 606
1838: And the man of the match is... Kyle Mills.
"This keeps us in the series, and to defend 180 today was a magnificent effort as it doesn't happen often. The talk in the dressing-room was about getting two quick wickets and one of them being Pietersen. Tim Southee struggled early on but for him to come back and get 4-38 was great"
New Zealand captain Daniel Vettori
"It didn't go our way today - we seemed to edge a few or hit the ball straight to fielders. Credit to Kyle Mills for the way he struck the ball at the end, but I thought the bowlers were fantastic. As a batting unit, we would have taken 180 and we should have reached it. I've got a bit of a stiff back, but it's nothing major"
England captain Paul Collingwood
"The last four New Zealand wickets put on over 100 runs, so it made a huge difference to the game. But if you take Elliott's innings away, Mills wouldn't have had anything to work with, so the pair of them are both in contention for man of the match. England bat most of the way down, but maybe because of that, nobody really took responsibility"
Jack Russell on TMS
NEW ZEALAND WIN BY 22 RUNS TO LEVEL SERIES AT 1-1 (2 GAMES TO PLAY)
46.2 overs - WICKET - Tremlett c Vettori b Elliott 4 - Eng 160 all out
Aggers feels "the force is with New Zealand" and he's proved right as Tremlett aims a big hit off the second ball of the over and skies it to extra cover - the Kiwis win to level the series.
46th over - Eng 160-9
Vettori goes over the wicket to the left-handed Anderson, and beats his outside edge.
"That's a lucky break for Vettori - if Broad had missed that, it would have been called a wide!"
Jack Russell on TMS
45.5 overs - WICKET - Broad c Hopkins b Vettori 17 - Eng 160-9
Vettori to bowl his penultimate over. Tremlett works him to leg, and gets the single he's been after. Broad on strike - 25 needed from 29 balls. Broad turns a single off his legs. 24 needed from 28. Tremlett prods forward but can't beat the man at short third man. Then a drive to long-on brings a single - 23 needed fom 26. But then Broad tries to work another one off his legs, he only succeeds in edging it behind his legs to keeper Hopkins, who catches at the second attempt - and Broad's gone!
45th over - Eng 157-8
An intriguing conundrum for Vettori - with Mills and Southee having bowled their 10 overs, who does he turn to? It initially looks like Gillespie, but he's only got two left, so in the end they turn to Elliott. Will England attack his medium pace? Tremlett can't get the first ball away, and then swings and misses at the next couple. 27 needed off 33. Another swing-and-a-miss, Tremlett would have struck out by now in a baseball game. Vettori shuffles his field, sending a long-on back, but Tremlett can't get Elliott's slower ball past the infield. Five dots in a row. He finally gets a leg-bye to fine leg, and New Zealand won't be too upset that he's kept Broad away from the strike.
44th over - Eng 156-8
Vettori has a slip in against Tremlett, who was totally bamboozled by Anil Kumble in the Tests against India last year, but he's off the mark with a single to leg. Big expectation on Broad's shoulders now. He's struck on the pad, umpire Steve "Interesting" Davis shakes his head straight away. Another lbw shout, another head-shake - that one wasn't far away. Broad guides it through extra cover and they run two.
43rd over - Eng 153-8
New batsman is Chris Tremlett - he's struck on the pad first ball, but it was going down leg and they run a leg-bye. Southee finishes with 10-2-38-4.
42.5 overs - WICKET - Collingwood lbw b Southee 34 - Eng 152-8
After all those thick edges, Vettori brings in a solitary man at fourth slip for Broad, who carves Southee to midwicket for a single to bring up the 150. Colly works him off his legs for another one - remember, this is Southee's last over. Broad edges wide of the fourth slip and they take another single. But then it's a huge wicket for the Kiwis as Colly is trapped in front, although did it hit him a fraction outside off-stump? Anyway, Colly's brave knock is ended.
42nd over - Eng 149-7
Broad singles off Vettori, and the Kiwi skipper again offers Colly an empty infield on the leg side, offering him a single if he can play against the spin. He does so. Broad then prods forward and misses, Hopkins whips off the bails but Broad's back foot was grounded.
"Good to hear that Sarah, Canterbury is still out there, missed the Sarahs with their sense of humour! Aggers has just been talking about the supervisors at the ground, at Trent Bridge one supervisor is called the Fat Controller, so every time he appears in the William Clarke stand renditions of Thomas the Tank Engine pipe up"
Nigel in VERY WET Nottingham, in the TMS inbox
[As a child, I once queued up to get a Thomas the Tank Engine book signed by the Rev W Awdry himself - MM]
41st over - Eng 146-7
The umpires consult about the light, but seeing as (a) England were only five behind on D/L after 40 overs, and (b) Mills, the fastest bowler has completed his allocation, I can't believe England would take the light, even if they were offered it. With a slight whiff of gamesmanship, Mills - not the quickest in the field - has left the field and 12th man Marshall (a much better fielder) comes on. Southee to bowl, he has two overs left. Broad can't get him away early on, but another thick edge to third man brings a single off the last ball.
40th over - Eng 145-7
Vettori returns, and a thick outside edge brings Broad a single to third man. The field is now being changed nearly every ball, especially considering England have a left hand/right hand combo. Vettori tries to tempt Colly into hitting him across the line into the sparsely-populated leg-side field, and comes very, very, very close to an lbw. (Hawk-Eye suggests it might have marginally clipped leg stump). The reprieved Colly pushes a single to mid-on, and the light is fading a little. Broad pinches the strike with a single, and R4 LW listeners go to the Shipping Forecast.
39th over - Eng 142-7
Colly seems happy to see off Mills' last over, but turns the penultimate ball to backward square leg for a single. Broad gracefully guides a single through point. England are still slightly behind on Duckworth-Lewis, with seven wickets down they would have needed to have 148 at the end of this over. Mills finishes with 2-42.
"David Ward [8th over] now coaches at my son's school. Apparently his nickname was "Gnasher" - you understand why when you meet him!"
Neil in Surrey, via text on 81111
38th over - Eng 140-7
Styris strays again with another wide, and responds by bringing in a slip for Broad. He punches the ball into the off side, but can't beat the man at Reasonably Short Extra Cover. The long-legged Broad works one off his hip and his long strides bring them back for three. Colly square-cuts for two, then nudges a single to fine leg.
"I wonder if the Penguin will bowl a Flipper?"
Phil Atkin, Nottingham, in the TMS inbox
37th over - Eng 133-7
Mills in for his penultimate over, and a Colly single brings new batsman Stuart Broad on strike. Can Broad win it for England, and in doing so wrest the man-of-the-match award away from Mills? A superb cover-drive by Broad looks four all the way, but McCullum chases it right to the edge and when all looks lost, a superb tumbling stop saves the boundary. They run three anyway, but I'm tempted to say that if New Zealand win by one run, McCullum should get the MOM award, just for that stop.
"This is a great advert for 50-over cricket as a game this long gives you time to get out of a hole - while in Twenty20, once you're in a hole you can't get out"
Vic Marks on TMS
36th over - WICKET - Swann c Taylor b Styris 29 - Eng 129-7
Styris has an lbw shout against Colly, but it looked high. Colly still doesn't look entirely comfortable out there, how's the hamstring? He manages a leg-bye, and then the Penguin sends down a legside wide. The England pair exchange singles, but then Styris makes the breakthrough as Swann steers one straight to Taylor at mid-wicket. Swanny up the... err... Swannee?
35th over - Eng 125-6
Mills returns to the attack in place of Gillespie, and Swann tries his favoured "steer to third man" shot without success. The England pair dab a single apiece, and Aggers is still astonished that we haven't had a single weather interruption yet. Swann then plays a candidate for "shot of the day" as he lifts Mills over the cover fieldsmen for four. He then carves it down past backward point and they run two, although "Boundary Fox" Flynn's throw breaks the stumps. This is now the highest seventh-wicket partnership for England against New Zealand in ODIs.
"I don't really understand the panic! I realise England are batting badly, but so did NZ! At over 32, they were 82-6 whereas England were 114-6!"
Phil. Newcastle, in the TMS inbox
34th over - Eng 117-6
Styris tries to tempt Swann outside off-stump, the BBC columnist nibbles at it but fails to make contact. Swann slashes at another wide delivery but only picks up a single to 12th man James Marshall on the cover boundary - that's the fifty stand. Colly pinches the strike with a single off the last ball, and it's time for a drinks break - and a compulsory end-of-34th-over ball change.
"Surely Darren Gough and the Waughs are pretty high in a 'ugly cricketers' list - Ross Taylor's got a dodgy pout style look going on as well... does this list include ex-players because if so Ian Smith has hit the maximum in the ugly sector"
Sam in Glossop in the TMS inbox
33rd over - Eng 114-6
Alec and Simon Mann on TMS speculate on whether Colly's shoulder and hamstring injuries might cause him to miss the odd game. Gillespie keeps it tight against the England skipper and delivers a much-needed maiden for the Black Caps.
"New Zealand will know that when Swann's on strike, he's the wicket they want. Collingwood's the match-winner, but the Kiwis will want to chip away at the weaker batsman"
Alec Stewart on TMS
32nd over - Eng 114-6
Vettori withdraws himself from the attack and throws the ball to Scott Styris, who comes on with his dibbly-dobbly medium pace. The Penguin is making his 150th ODI appearance today and Colly carves him to leg but Taylor is in quickly off the mid-wicket boundary to restrict them to a single. Vettori rotates his field, bringing in a slip for Swann to prevent him from trying to run the ball to third man. A couple of quick singles keep the scoreboard moving, and the Penguin digs in a bouncer to complete the over.
"Would the Kiwis consider knocking 50 runs off their total just to make a game of it?"
Ceri in a very moist Solihull, in the TMS inbox
31st over - Eng 111-6
Colly shows Gillespie a straight bat, but eventually manages to work him away for a single to fine leg, to bring England onto Nelson.
"In reply to Daniel in LA - nooooo! Leave the Colonel up here at the Riverside. England have already stolen far too many of our players. Hands off Phil, Onions, Harmy, Plunkett and Colly!"
Patrick, Durham, in the TMS inbox
30th over - Eng 110-6
Vettori strays with a no-ball (unforgivable for a spinner?), thus earning Swann a free hit (with the same field). Vettori tosses it up, Swann takes an agricultural swipe and it sails over the bowler's head for four. Buoyed by that hit, Swann heaves it to midwicket where Mills completely misses the ball so the Notts man has another boundary. England are still 16 runs behind on Duckworth-Lewis if it were to rain now.
"Here you go for a streaker icon. And thanks to all those people who 'felt sorry' for NZ, and offered to give them 50 runs to make a game of it. Never count your chickens"
Laurie in Tonbridge in the TMS inbox
29th over - Eng 101-6
Gillespie has a loud lbw shout against Swann, but the ball appeared to be going down leg. Swann prods a single to backward point, while sub fielder James Marshall (see earlier) has also been joined by 13th man Jeetan Patel, who's also on the field. Patel must do more sub-fielding in ODIs than any other international cricket. Captain Colly gets England to three figures with a pull past the square-leg umpire. Meanwhile, on TMS Chris Cairns is channeling Duncan Fletcher, urging Gillespie to "come to the party".
28th over - Eng 96-6
Swann works a single to leg from Vettori, while a Mexican Wave variant encircles the ground, with fans throwing litter in the air rather than just waving their hands. Of course, as soon as the wave reaches the windward side of the ground, plenty of that litter blows onto the pitch. A couple more singles keep the scoreboard ticking along - just.
27th over - Eng 93-6
Southee's off after eight overs and Gillespie gets another trundle. Colly shoulders arms to the first couple outside off stump, then steers another single to the cover sweeper. Swann dabs a single to pinch the strike. My computer nearly turns itself off, but the situation is rescued. But can England's, at 93-6?
"Re: Evangeline's comment about the ugliest man in cricket - I turned on the telly during the IPL to see a team containing Gilchrist, Styris & Gibbs! That really was the stuff of nightmares! PS My daughter's horrified by the inclusion of Alastair Cook in that list"
Mary, Redditch, in the TMS inbox
26th over - Eng 91-6
Swann takes a single off Vettori, and England then sportingly decline to run any more when the throw comes in and rebounds off Colly at the striker's end. Colly cracks a single to the cover sweeper for a trotted single.
25th over - Eng 89-6
As Chris Cairns on TMS points out that Swann has opened the batting for Notts in county cricket (and knows him well from his own spell at Trent Bridge), Colly lifts Southee from outside off stump to the mid-wicket boundary for four. Colly then waves frantically at a man walking behind the bowler's arm, which holds up play again. How can these people not realise what they're doing? (I mean the people walking behind the arm, not the hapless England middle order).
"Re: Evangeline (8th over), one name: Nantie Hayward. Even tops Saj Mahmood in the 'who fell furthest out of the ugly tree' stakes. To cap it all off, the bright orange hair must have been a real kick in the teeth!"
Sarah, Canterbury, in the TMS inbox
24th over - Eng 85-6
Swann is finally off the mark as he chops a single down towards third man. After Colly rotates the strike, Swann then cuts loose and clubs Vettori towards cow corner for four.
"In reply to Pete [9th over] I think England are lucky they are only playing the Black Caps - watching the All Blacks this morning I think if you put a lump of willow in their hands England would be chasing a substantially larger target now!"
Fahqui in St Petersburg, Russia, in the TMS inbox
23rd over - Eng 79-6
A curious cameo as Southee runs in to bowl, Colly blocks away as a pigeon flashes past him, yet still half-plays a shot as the ball comes through! He eventually steers a single to third man as the pigeons are joined by some swooping seagulls. A leg-bye completes the over.
"Does anyone else have a feeling Bopara will always be a good player, but never quite cut it at international level, a la Hick and Ramprakash?"
Jack, Hertfordshire, in the TMS inbox
"Vettori's going to block up one end here, so it's intriguingly poised - every run is going to be greeted with a round of applause"
Chris Cairns on TMS
22nd over - Eng 77-6
The wily Kiwi spinner Daniel Vettori introduces himself into the attack for some orthodox left-arm spin. Fellow spinner Swann carefully defends his stumps. Luke Wright is sat on the England balcony, biting his nails, as Swann survives an lbw shout from Vettori as the ball hits him just outside the line of off-stump. A maiden for the Kiwi skipper.
"I don't want to disgrace all female cricket fans by pressing this point but how is Alastair Cook the ugliest man in cricket?? It pains me that even this match is more interesting than the medical degree I'm meant to be revising for"
Nicki in London in the TMS inbox
21st over - Eng 77-6
Aggers wonders whether any fielders carrying the Duckworth-Lewis tables in their pocket could try sledging the England batsmen by mentioning how far behind they are, as Colly ducks under a bouncer from Southee. Jack Russell teases him by remembering when David "Syd" Lawrence hit Aggers for six once in a county match. A Colly cover-drive for four is the only blemish on Southee's over.
"That's a great idea of yours to introduce a 'double-play' in cricket. That would help us over here appreciate and understand cricket more easily"
Michael Fawson, Toronto, Canada, in the TMS inbox
20th over - Eng 73-6
New batsman is Graeme Swann, and he watches from the non-striker's end as Colly looks to rebuild England's shattered innings. Elliott sportingly advances England's score with a couple of wides, then Colly tries to edge one off his hip and four leg-byes ensue. Finally he gets one off the bat, nudging it down to deep backward square leg for two, and Colly clearly isn't running as he should - it looks like he's carrying a hamstring injury, having picked it up while fielding. So given the situation, why doesn't he call for a runner? Yet another flick to long leg brings just a single. We have 20 overs, and we have a match. And at this point, with six down, England are 58 runs behind on Duckworth-Lewis, says TMS scorer Malcolm Ashton.
19th over - WICKET - Ambrose c Taylor b Southee 0 - Eng 64-6
If the rain's going to save England, it'll have to come in the next six balls as they're going to be well behind the Duckworth-Lewis rate once we reach 20 overs and have a match. The diminuitive Tim Ambrose stalks to the crease, and he's going to have to play a lot better than he did at Edgbaston if England are to win this game. He wafted a lot outside off-stump but very rarely connected. And what does he do off the last ball of the over? Fences at one outside off-stump, and gives a slip-catching-practice-style catch to Ross Taylor at first slip, which he juggles but eventually takes. Southee has a double-wicket maiden. And at this rate, my fear [see 1st over] of England getting rolled for 150 is looking exceedingly optimistic!
18.2 overs - WICKET - Shah c Styris b Southee 0 - Eng 64-5
Shah ducks under a bouncer from Southee, then offers an edge to second slip to give The Penguin his second catch of the innings.
"Despite their low total, this is a good period for New Zealand - Shah and Collingwood have to play themselves in now"
Former Gloucestershire and England wicket-keeper Jack Russell on TMS
18th over - Eng 64-4
Elliott continues, bowling off what Simon Mann calls "an old Sunday League-style run". Colly is facing a big rebuilding job here, and safely sees off a maiden over.
"England still seem to lack that killer instinct great teams have. At 49-5 they were on the ropes, but through poor bowling, fielding, and now batting, the Kiwis are in a decent position"
Frank, Wolverhampton (where the weather is awful)
17th over - Eng 64-4
So, England now have two batsmen in on nought, neither of whom have faced a ball. Owais Shah blocks his first ball.
16.5 overs - WICKET - Bopara c How b Southee 27 - Eng 64-4
With that last partnership broken, Southee stays on as Bopara is joined by Captain Colly. Bopara clips Southee through the cover and they run two - although Colly has to run hard to make his ground - a direct hit might have seen him run out without facing. Then, Bopara tries to steer a wide one through backward point where How takes a superb catch. Wheels. Falling. Off!
16th over - WICKET - Bell c McCullum b Elliott 20 - Eng 62-3
Despite that carnage in the last over, Vettori presses ahead with the third powerplay, and Bopara takes a single off Elliott's second over. Meanwhile, the Press Association's sports wire have picked up the Hampshire news I mentioned in the 13th over - and takes me back to my childhood by stating that Tim Tremlett will be released by England to play for Hampshire. Wonder if they think Chris Broad and Arnie Sidebottom are in the England squad as well? And the very ball after my "gaffer" Anna Thompson remarks on how well England are going, Bell reaches outside off-stump and carves the ball straight to McCullum at cover. Thanks, Anna.
15th over - Eng 61-2
Southee has replaced Mills and begins his third over with a wide, before Bell finally finds the boundary with a well-timed flick off his hips past the square-leg umpire. Then, a powerful square-cut for four takes his score to 16 and earns him a glove-punch from his buddy Bopara. A cover-drive brings a third successive four. A big over for England.
"Obviously, this £1,000 fine isn't working - would it be possible to build machine gun towers with the fines already accrued? It will be cost-effective as it would only need to be used once to deter future moronic - and overly publicised in commentary - behaviour"
T. Frost in the TMS inbox
"Do you have an icon for a streaker?"
Tommie, the Netherlands, in the TMS inbox [No - MM]
14th over - Eng 48-2
After that expensive, streaker-fuelled over from Southee, captain Vettori makes a change and brings Elliott's gentle medium pace into the attack. As Mark Pougatch on TMS compares him to previous NZ medium-pace trundlers like Gavin Larsen and Chris Harris, Bell nudges him down to third man for a single. The England duo add another single apiece.
13th over - Eng 45-2
The TMS team reveal that England will allow Dimitri Mascarenhas to play for Hampshire in their Twenty20 matches on Sunday and Monday, while Chris Tremlett will also play on Monday, before the pair return to the England squad for nets on Tuesday - the next ODI taking place at The Oval on Wednesday. Bell dabs a single, his first run since the seventh over. England will be relieved to know that Mills can only bowl three more overs.
"Durham and Phil 'Colonel' Mustard on fire (yet again).The selectors have really made a hash of excluding him"
Daniel (on vacation in Las Vegas) in the TMS inbox
12th over - Eng 44-2
After a brief interlude of a pitch invader (who is informed by the PA announcer that he's just been fined £1,000 as he is marched off), Bopara square-cuts Southee for four. Not to be outdone, a second pitch invader interrupts the match, and this one is a streaker, who is eventually felled by a burly security steward. Bopara takes his score to 19 with a two through mid-wicket. A couple of orange-jacketed stewards walk behind the bowler's arm to delay proceedings once more, and Southee seems rattled as Bopara carves him through midwicket for another four.
11th over - Eng 34-2
Peter Hartley signals the second powerplay. Bopara continues to ride his luck as he gets an inside edge past the stumps for four, while Vettori temporarily leaves the field to be replaced by a curly-haired Marshall. We assume it's James Marshall, who played in the first two Tests, but you wouldn't put your house on it not being his identical twin Hamish, who's retired from internationals but now plays here at Bristol for Gloucestershire. Bopara works Mills off his legs for three - it was nearly four, but the third umpire Nigel Llong rules that Southee did not touch the rope as he made a diving stop on the boundary.
10th over - Eng 27-2
Remember, if it rains, England need to face 20 overs for it to constitute a match - but worryingly, they'd need to be 40-2 at the end of this over to keep pace with the Duckworth-Lewis par score. It's a change of bowling as Tim Southee replaces Gillespie. Bell drives to mid-off, and yet more hesitancy almost sees Bopara run out at the bowler's end, while with the large numbers of pigeons on the pitch, Vic Marks bemoans the absence of Henry Blofeld from TMS today. A maiden for Southee.
"It's monsoon conditions at Donington Park for the Motorcycle GP qualifying, so maybe England will have to get their skates (or should that be flippers) on later"
Graham in sunny Barcelona, in the TMS inbox
REPORT: MotoGP qualifying from Donington
9th over - Eng 27-2
Bopara flashes at one outside off-stump, "a horrid shot" says Aggers, and he's nearly caught by the leaping Southee at third man, but it just eludes him and it goes for four. A novel way to get off the mark, I suppose. Nearly a third wicket for Mills, who has to be an early shout for man of the match. Bopara works him to mid-wicket, and despite some more uncertain running between the wickets, they pick up two.
"I'm sure this has already been said, but if we could add the cricket and rugby scores together it might look a lot better for England"
Pete in the TMS inbox
8th over - Eng 21-2
Bell lets a couple go by outside off-stump, but the TMS team feel they should be wary of messrs Duckworth and Lewis, just in case the weather turns for the worse. There is a phalanx of pigeons on the outfield, and Aggers reveals there are "thousands" of seagulls in the Bristol area, including some who kept him awake last night. Then, Bell pulls away as one particular pigeon flies across his vision, and as Gillespie gets to the stumps, he trips over his own footmarks. Blame the pigeon - but it's another maiden nevertheless.
"Is it just me, or is Scott Styris possible the ugliest person in cricket? we can't seem to decide whether that honour goes to him, Alastair Cook, Freddie Flintoff or Michael Vaughan..."
Evangeline, Suffolk, obviously very bored, in the TMS inbox
[Did you ever see a bloke called David Ward play for Surrey in the 80s and 90s? MM]
7th over - Eng 21-2
Bell pushes for a quick single, Bopara/Inzamam hesitates mid-pitch and has to dive full-length to make his ground at the striker's end. Apparently he's been involved in seven run-outs in 21 innings for England already. Mills is breathing heavily, but Chris Cairns says he always looks like that - "he is the world's tiredest man".
6th over - Eng 20-2
Bell nudges a single through the covers, and Bopara has time to play himself in here. He shoulders arms outside off-stump as Gillespie varies his pace well.
"I bet Alec a whole chocolate orange cake [see NZ innings] that NZ will reach 160. I just hope my housemates don't mind, seeing as they are still making said cake in the kitchen"
Mike, Bath, in the TMS inbox
"19 for 2? It's game on now"
Jonathan Agnew on TMS
5th over - Eng 19-2
New batsman is Ravi Bopara - who's scoring shedloads of runs for Essex, but put him in an England shirt and he's a run-out waiting to happen - the new Boycott/Inzamam? If you didn't see Wednesday's game, there was an awful mix-up between him and Colly where either of them could have been run out at either end. (Luckily, cricket is yet to embrace baseball's "double play"). Ravi sees off the over.
4.4 overs - WICKET - Pietersen c Elliott b Mills 4 - Eng 19-2
Bell gets a leading edge off Mills, and it flies up into the air but just wide of Jamie How at backward point. They run one. KP then troubles the scorers for the first time with a powerful square-cut for four. But as he tries to force the next ball off his legs, he spoons one to midwicket. Kiwis are cock-a-hoop.
4th over - Eng 14-1
KP still not yet off the mark against Gillespie. The big man is a little becalmed so far - and with a relatively small total to chase, why not? A maiden over.
3rd over - Eng 14-1
Mills fails to tempt Bell with a couple of bouncers, which he leaves well alone. Then he strays down the leg side, and it shoots away for five more wides. NZ have already conceded more runs in wides than England did in the entire innings - one of those an over and they should be fine.
"I thought Simon Mann was on trial for plotting a coup in Africa. Have they let him out for good behaviour in order to appear on TMS?"
Orson, Istanbul, in the TMS inbox
[It's a different Simon Mann! MM]
2nd over - Eng 9-1
Mark Gillespie takes the second over. When I was at the second Test in Wellington a few months back, our (female) tour manager remarked that Gillespie was the most recognisable of the New Zealand players. Why, I asked? "Because his bottom sticks out when he runs in to bowl," she said. Apparently. After playing an air-shot to the first ball of the over, Bell nudges a single to leg, then KP tries to hit out off the back foot but can't time the ball. England profit when Gillespie bangs in one which is short and wide, and sails over both batsman and wicketkeeper for five wides.
"Is it me or has Colly's fielding got worse these days? Dropped catches, missing the stumps, he's not the Jonty-esque force he once was"
Mark, Oxford, in the TMS inbox
"I think there's a real issue with Wright's technique on lower-bouncing wickets. He's obviously got something, but [England batting coach] Andy Flower's going to have to work with him"
Chris Cairns on TMS
1st over - Eng 3-1
The TMS team are concerned that Kevin Pietersen may not be ready in time, but he eventually emerges. His first ball is a lifter and he is inches away from gloving it to the keeper. Anyone else harbouring a dark thought that England could get rolled for 150 here?
0.4 overs - WICKET - Wright c Styris b Mills 2 - Eng 3-1
Bell, who's not had much to do in this game so far, plays forward and gets a single off his first ball, while Wright nudges his first ball to backward square leg for a couple. And spookily, just after a spectator in the crowd waves a Scott Styris mask at the camera, Wright fends at one outside off-stump and edges it straight to Styris at second slip!
1458: Right, we're off again. Ian Bell and Luke Wright opening up for England, with Kyle Mills taking the new ball.
"Confiscation of inflatables from a couple of fancy dress clad spectators? It's just not cricket! Someone at the ECB needs to be spoken to. Next time they'll ban booze and singing and then where will we be?"
James Valentine in the TMS inbox
1418: Well, while the TMS team enjoy their chocolate rolls and Aggers speaks to Lalit Modi, I'm off for a sandwich - see you back here soon.
NEW ZEALAND INNINGS
50th over - WICKET - Mills c Collingwood b Wright 47 - NZ 182 all out
Last man Mark Gillespie is the non-striker as they crossed on the catch. Mills cracks the second ball of Wright's over like a tracer bullet through the covers for four, then hoists the third over the bowler's head for six. An attempted bouncer from Wright is missed by Mills, then the fifth ball is whacked low towards long-off. It falls just short of Tremlett and as he dives to attempt the catch, the ball bounces past him for four. Mills takes an almighty swing at the last ball, but skies it into the covers where Colly takes a comfortable catch. A superb 47 off 40 balls from Mills - his best ever ODI score. Phew. If he'd had another over, he might have overtaken Elliott. And New Zealand have a total to bowl at - a much better total than they could have hoped for at 75-6.
49.1 overs - WICKET - Southee c Pietersen b Wright 0 - NZ 168-9
Wright gets the last over, Southee smacks his first ball into the air and is well held by KP at long-on. A golden duck!
49th over - NZ 168-8
Anderson's last ball - Mills gets an inside edge which goes past the stumps, past Ambrose, and past fine leg for four. Anderson finishes with 3-61 - he's gone for 6.1 runs per over (Broad's economy rate was 1.4, Tremlett's 2.4) and somehow he's picked up three wickets.
48.5 overs - WICKET - Elliott c Wright b Anderson 57 - NZ 164-8
Mills finally cuts loose, rocking back and hoisting Anderson over extra cover for six. A poor full-toss is then despatched for four (thus winning Mark Pougatch a chocolate roll from Alec Stewart - see 46th over), and the wheels seem to be coming off for Jimmy as he then sends down a wide. The next ball is straighter, Elliott pulls it to the mid-wicket boundary where only Wright's diving stop restricts them to two. He tries the same shot again, but skies it and Wright takes a very well-judged catch, falling to the ground as he takes it.
48th over - NZ 150-7
Tremlett's last over - so who'll bowl the last? Mills nudges a single (which he's getting very good at doing), Elliott flashes at one outside off-stump - then guides a single to third man to bring up his half-century (99 balls, two fours). Mills steps back and upper-cuts a four over backward point for four, where the ball is fielded by what appear to be a Tight Fit tribute band (complete with leopardskin outfits and headbands). The Lion will certainly sleep tonight, if he hasn't been put to sleep by the New Zealand batting performance. 1-24 from Tremlett's 10 overs - "a tremendous effort", says Alec Stewart.
"Did I really see some stewards trying to confiscate a couple of plastic inflatable mallets from a pair of dudes in fancy dress? Who ARE these jobsworths?"
Dermot Wickham in the TMS inbox
47th over - NZ 143-7
Mills takes a single and Elliott, as he has often done in this innings, opens the face and nurdles the ball down to third man. He's hit 29 singles and just two fours. Mills rotates the strike, then Elliott knocks the ball to Colly at backward point. Colly's throw breaks the stumps at the bowler's end, Elliott's in but the ball rebounds far enough for them to take a second run. Three overs left - Elliott has 49 now.
46th over - NZ 137-7
In an attempt to liven up the last five overs, Alec Stewart lays down a challenge by betting Mark Pougatch a chocolate mini-roll that the Kiwis will not reach 160. Tremlett replaces Colly at the Pavilion End, and Mills knocks him away for a single. Elliott is hit on the pad and they scamper a leg-bye. After a short ball is adjudged as a wide, Tremlett has a half-hearted lbw appeal against Elliott, but umpire Hartley - who may have played alongside Hartley, as his last season at Hampshire (2000) was Tremlett's debut season - isn't having anything of it. Another run and another leg-bye complete the over.
"The lack of e-mails is probably due to a dwindling interest in these Kiwis as a fighting force. If it was a football match we'd probably be chanting, 'Are you Shrewsbury in disguise!' (For the Hereford supporters)"
Martin Murphy in the TMS inbox
45th over - NZ 132-7
Alec Stewart on TMS says the game is "appalling to watch" at the moment, and I'm inclined to agree. He's more interested with the cookies which have just arrived in the TMS box - while the TV cameraman is showing more of the fancy dress in the crowd (including some chaps in "horse-riding" outfits, in the style of Bernie Clifton the ostrich rider) than he is of the game. "This is like watching Geoff Boycott play a one-day international", says Aggers. Three singles are added, none particularly noteworthy.
44th over - NZ 129-7
Colly will indeed bowl his last over - while Aggers reveals that he will be talking to Lalit Modi, vice president of the BCCI (the Indian board) and chairman of the Indian Premier League (IPL), during the interval. Could be a very interesting listen, considering Modi's hard line about how English counties fielding players from the rebel Indian Cricket League (ICL) will not be allowed to play in the Twenty20 Champions League - thus disqualifying all but a handful of them... Five inoffensive singles are added to the score, in a very dull manner, and Colly finishes with 1-34 from his 10 overs.
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43rd over - NZ 124-7
We have a change of bowling as Swann is off, Anderson returns for his seventh over, and he might bowl through here. Mills guides him through the vacant slip area for four but can't get him away until the fifth ball yields a single. Elliott pats the last ball back and Anderson is in quickly to prevent him running a single and keep Mills on strike for the next over.
"I'm nearly feeling sorry for the NZs now. Can we give them 50 runs to make more of a game of it?"
M Black, Margate, in the TMS inbox
42nd over - NZ 119-7
Colly in for his ninth successive over, Mills taps and runs a single. Colly keeps it tight, Elliott can only manage a single and Mills knocks the last ball - a slower ball - away for another one. A bit dull at this stage, to be brutal. Eight overs left - as Graham Taylor once said, can they not knock it?
41st over - NZ 116-7
Elliott prods Swann away for a single, then the off-spinner has Mills tied down until he guides a single to fine leg. Another rapid over, just two runs from it. "It's quite grey around the ground", says Simon Mann on TMS.
"Mills can hit the ball well, but with 10 overs left, he doesn't have much licence to do so at the moment"
Vic Marks on TMS
40th over - NZ 114-7
It's still Captain Colly from the Pavilion End - Elliott (in his first ODI innings, lest we forget) is still playing the anchor role, knocking a couple of singles, while Mills - no mean batsman himself - is off the mark with a single of his own. Here we go for the last 10.
39th over - NZ 111-7
Elliott nudges a quick single to pinch the strike off new batsman Kyle Mills.
"That catch was like a benefit match, where the batsman gets to 50 and deliberately chips the ball into the air so someone else can have a go. I once got Tom Graveney out like that"
Vic Marks on TMS
38.5 overs - WICKET - Vettori c Shah b Swann 18 - NZ 110-7
Elliott knocks Swann away for a single, he's getting into Neil Fairbrother-style "single off every ball" mode. Vettori then dabs into the off side, Colly is in quick to throw at the bowler's end - if he'd hit, Vettori would have been out by a yard, but he misses the stumps and the single is completed. Eventually, Vettori goes aerial against Swann, trying to hit him over the top, and Shah languidly takes the catch at long-on.
"Okay, old joke reworked for today! Two New Zealand cricket bats lying on a dressing room floor, when a cricket ball rolls by. One bat turns to the other says; 'What's that?', the other replies: 'Beats me?'"
Anthony Walton, Church Village, South Wales, in the TMS inbox
38th over - DROPPED CATCH - NZ 107-6
Colly finds Vettori's edge, Ambrose gets his left hand to it but the chance is put down. Colly puts his head in his hands as his fellow skipper is reprieved, and Vettori then steers a single to third man. It's all singles from this pair against Colly at the moment - are they planning an all-out assault on Swann?
37th over - NZ 103-6
Vettori straight-drives Swann and they manage to run two to Shah ("by today's standards, he's slow in the field", says Vic on TMS) at long-on. Swann is rapidly through his over as just one more run is added.
"I wonder if the two teams have come to an agreement to finish the match as soon as possible, to avoid the weather becoming a factor like last time. Unless anyone has a better reason for the NZ capitulation. Maybe their rugby boys could give them lessons in how to play against England"
Dan, Halifax (where it's raining), in the TMS inbox
36th over - NZ 100-6
Vic Marks on TMS observes that Colly's shoulder problem must be easing up as he digs in a couple of bouncers to Elliott, one of which Ambrose has to take at full stretch above his head. But Elliott has his revenge when he cover-drives a loose one for four. Two more singles finally bring up three figures for the tourists.
"Never mind the excuses. New Zealand are pathetic and deserve to be thrashed"
Mike, Japan, in the TMS inbox
35th over - NZ 94-6
The "new" (used) ball is indeed handed to Swann for our first look at some spin. He has a sweeper on the cover and mid-wicket boundaries, and men at long-off and long-on. Swann bowls four dot balls, Elliott then manages a single, and Vettori can't get the last ball away either.
"I firmly believed the sage & onion was coming out at Euro2008 last night. How wrong can one be? Whilst Turkey upset the form guide there is no chance that New Zealand will do the same today"
Mike from Norwich (holder of two tickets to next weekends ODI)
[I think Turkey's team song must be that old Kylie number, "Never Too Late" - MM]
Turkey's late, late show
34th over - NZ 93-6
Colly to bowl the last over with the old ball (remember, the ball is changed after 34 overs in ODIs these days). Elliott and Vettori are content to push some sedate singles, and Swanny is warming up - might he be coming on soon?
33rd over - NZ 90-6
It's still medium pace from both ends as Wright allows Elliott a single before he strays with a wide. Then, Vettori off-drives and some comedy fielding from KP ensues. He misses the ball, then slows up thinking it was going for four anyway, then accelerates as the ball doesn't look as if it's going to go... and just misses out. If he'd chased it all the way, he'd have got it. Vettori rotates the strike with a leg-bye, and Elliott nudges a single to fine leg. Bit of a sloppy over that, time for Wright to take a break?
"Re: Will Porterfield’s catch – Is that the first time that a captain of one international side has taken a catch for another international side in an ODI? And thus, it would seem only fair that Paul Collingwood performs 12th man duties for Ireland when they face New Zealand in Aberdeen next month..."
Mark Woods in the TMS inbox
INTERNET LINK: Will Porterfield's career stats on Cricinfo
32nd over - NZ 82-6
Aggers on TMS notices that Shah has one of his hands heavily strapped, which may be the reason why he's in the deep and KP is in the slips. Maybe Colly is favouring the policy of a captain I played under once called Richard Stearn (coincidentally, ginger-haired like Colly) whose field placings amounted to telling us "field wherever you like". An off-drive brings Elliott a single, and an on-drive just wide of the bowler brings a four for Vettori.
And don't forget to get involved on the e-mails (email@example.com, with "For Mark Mitchener" in the subject line) as it's gone a bit quiet - are you all missing Ben Dirs? Or are you all stunned into submission by not being able to moan about England's poor performance?
31st over - NZ 77-6
Vettori knocks his first ball from Wright away for a couple, then impresses the TMS crew with a "leave the ball outside off stump and then bend down to tie his shoelace in the same motion" manoeuvre. The Kiwi skipper is a good poker player, according to Chris Cairns, and fences at a couple more without making contact.
30th over - NZ 75-6
The wicket brings skipper Daniel Vettori to the crease, and he watches from the non-striker's end as Elliott sees off the rest of the over safely.
29.3 overs - WICKET - Hopkins c sub (WTS Porterfield) b Collingwood 7 - NZ 75-6
Just when New Zealand looked like they were building a bit of momentum, Hopkins tries to pull Colly to leg and skies it to Porterfield at deep backward square leg. The Irishman sinks to his knees as the catch is taken.
29th over - NZ 74-5
Finally, we have the first boundary since the 12th over when Elliott square-cuts a half-volley to the point boundary. Elliott is starting to loosen up a little, and almost benefits from some overthrows when the ball is needlessly thrown at the stumps when Hopkins is clearly through for a single, but Tremlett is backing up.
28th over - NZ 67-5
Some sloppy fielding from Anderson in the deep allows Elliott a second run. Colly then raps Elliott on the pad, but umpire Peter Hartley, despite being a former bowler, shakes his head - although Hawk-Eye suggests it might have just hit leg stump. After Elliott works away another single, Colly then gets one to cut back at Hopkins and they appeal for a catch behind, but to no avail.
"I can't work out the batting - I'm struggling to understand the plan. There's no intent - how can Broad only go for 14 runs from 10 overs in a 50-over game? Nobody tried to put pressure on him. 220 is the bare minimum they need here, they need to take some risks against Collingwood and Wright"
Chris Cairns on TMS
27th over - DROPPED CATCH - NZ 64-5
Hopkins steers Wright to third man and looks for two, but Porterfield is very quickly in and a bullet-like throw restricts them to a single. An Elliott single brings Hopkins back on strike, and he tries to chop one through backward point - where he's uncharacteristically dropped by the diving Colly. A fierce shot, but Colly regularly catches more difficult chances than that.
26th over - NZ 62-5
It's a double change in the bowling as we now have some military medium from Captain Colly. A very tidy over as the England skipper quickly finds a good line and length, and Hopkins finally manages to get the last ball away for a single. I guess the worry is now that in order for New Zealand to bat out the rest of their overs, they may have to bat in a very boring manner for the next couple of hours.
"Apart from MccCullum and Taylor, can any of the other NZ batters hit the ball past silly mid-off? Awful team"
BrainlessPathan on 606
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25th over - NZ 61-5
Finally, we have a fourth bowler - and it's medium-pacer Luke Wright. The Brettmeister General, sat next to me writing the match report, is furious that England never seem to give Ravi Bopara much of a bowl, even when he played in the Tests in Sri Lanka as an all-rounder. But it appears England just don't fancy his bowling. Elliott runs a quick single into the off side, and Hopkins nudges one off his hip as they rotate the strike.
"Mark, don't be silly! Saj Mahmood bowling a straight ball? Michael Vaughan played on. You'll be telling me next Stuart Broad can take wickets... oh dear..."
Ian Pollard, Worksop, in the TMS inbox
24th over - NZ 59-5
England suddenly have two substitute fielders on - Dimitri Mascarenhas, who was left out of the side today, and Gloucestershire batsman Will Porterfield, who played for Ireland in last year's World Cup but is now shivering in an England sweater. Some tight bowling from Tremmers yields just one single to each of the batsmen.
23rd over - NZ 57-5
Elliott steers a single to Bopara, who's seemingly been hiding for the entire innings so far but fields the ball at third man. Hopkins fences at Anderson outside the off stump, and the Lancashire man responds by gifting the Kiwis a legside wide. The Kiwi stumper is off the mark when he finally finds a gap through the off side with a cover drive from which they run an easy three. Five off the over - that's NZ's most profitable over since McCullum's fireworks in the third.
"The Met Office rain map , which is more reliable than the BBC forecast, has rain sweeping across Bristol around 5.30, so England need to make sure they are ahead on Duckworth-Lews after 20 overs around 4.30"
Peter, Havant, in the TMS inbox
22nd over - NZ 52-5
At this rate, if England bowl them out cheaply and the weather holds, they might have to play a beer match. New batsman is wicketkeeper Gareth Hopkins, but Elliott is facing and he turns Tremlett (who has replaced Broad) away for two to belatedly bring up the Kiwi half-century, then they rotate the strike with a leg-bye. Hopkins tries to guide Tremlett through the off side, but can't get the ball past the razor-sharp Captain Colly at backward point.
"As soon as young Master Broad came along, I realised how much he looks like my brother, Tom. I wonder if he’s a secret fan of hardcore 80s thrash?"
Jon in York in the TMS inbox
21st over - WICKET - Flynn c Tremlett b Anderson 2 - NZ 49-5
TMS may be operating a "buy one England wicketkeeper, get one free" policy as Jack Russell replaces Alec Stewart in the summariser's chair. Elliott works Anderson away for another single, then Flynn inexplicably skies a high full-toss high into the air and it's an easy catch for Tremlett at mid-off. The suspicion is that the full-toss was close to being above waist-height (and therefore a no-ball), but a turgid partnership of seven runs off 43 balls is nevertheless ended.
"To bowl four maidens in your 10 overs, with powerplays, shows what an achievement it is by Broad. He's a level-headed lad and he's enjoying the limelight"
Former England skipper Alec Stewart on TMS
20th over - NZ 48-4
As we suspected, Broad's going to bowl his 10 overs off the reel, having bowled so tightly so far this morning. The TMS crew discuss Andrew Flintoff - who collected his third golden duck of the season last night as Lancashire lost to Yorkshire in the Twenty20 Cup. Some bloke called Michael Vaughan also got a duck for Yorkshire - bowled by Sajid Mahmood. A straight ball from Mahmood? Surely not? Elliott nudges a single as the pedestrian scoring rate continues. Flynn pushes Broad's last ball away, and he gets a huge ovation for his outstanding figures of 10-4-14-2.
19th over - NZ 47-4
Tremlett's off and it's time for some more from Anderson. Flynn turns the first ball to fine leg for a single, while TMS commentator Mark Pougatch berates a day-glo-jacketed steward for standing right in the way of the "overs" part of the scoreboard. Speculation is rising as to whether England are trying to bowl the Kiwis out quickly - seeing as the weather forecast is not great. Elliott is off the mark with a single, and the left-handed Flynn swings and misses at the last ball.
"New Zealand are playing for the draw it would seem. Scintillating stuff. FYI, is hosing it down in Cork just across the channel and I imagine same weather will shortly be with you"
Charles Kane in the TMS inbox
18th over - NZ 45-4
Elliott dabs the ball into the leg side and thinks about a quick single but Broad is sharply down the wicket to field off his own bowling. My colleague Oliver Brett thinks Elliott resembles John Crawley, both in looks and batting style. Elliott/Crawley has to duck away from a snorter from Broad, and that's another maiden. His figures now 9-4-13-2.
17th over - NZ 45-4
Aggers warns "those on the high seas - brace yourselves" as TMS listeners on BBC Radio 4 Long Wave listeners prepare to be whisked away for the Shipping Forecast. Flynn tries to cover-drive Tremlett, but is denies even a single by a superb diving stop from Captain Colly in his favoured backward point position. A maiden, and we've had just four runs in the last five overs (and only two of those off the bat).
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"Come on England! Having just got home from the rugby and the misery of England getting thrashed by the All Blacks, I need a good cricket win over th Kiwis to deflect some of the stick I'm going to receive next week at work!"
Chris Sutcliffe - Chch NZ - in the TMS inbox
16th over - NZ 45-4
Umpire Peter Hartley whirls his arm before thrusting three fingers into the air as England unsurprisingly take the third powerplay. Elliott, recently in action for Weybridge in the Surrey League, trots through for a leg-bye, but Broad is still unerringly accurate. Flynn is finally off the mark when he steers one past the slips to third man for a single. Time for a drinks break.
"And to think people complain that Broad doesn't take wickets!"
Damo in Lincoln, via text on 81111
15th over - NZ 43-4
Flynn has a major rebuilding job on his hands, and sees off another tight over from Tremlett - with just a wide conceded. As well as fielding in the aforementioned orangey-brown sunglasses, KP has a string of beads around his neck, in the manner of a 1970s Dutch footballer. (Alec Stewart on TMS goes further and compares him to a 1970s porn star, though I couldn't possibly comment on that).
"Arrangements at train station were a shambles too - non-existent in fact! If Gloucestershire want to host international matches, they better sort this out! We've just got in and missed the champagne over!"
Andy Pickett in the TMS inbox
14th over - NZ 42-4
The new batsman is Grant Elliott, and I watched him make his Test debut in Napier when I was out in New Zealand in March. His first ball is a snorter from Broad, which he evades. A wicket maiden - Broad has figures of 7-2-12-2.
13.5 overs - WICKET - Taylor b Broad 8 - NZ 42-4
With England looking to turn the screw on the Kiwis, Broad continues for his seventh over, and knocks Taylor's off-stump out of the ground as he lazily tries to drive across the line. New Zealand are in "disarray", says Aggers.
13th over - NZ 42-3
New batsman is Daniel Flynn - who will always be remembered on this tour from having some impromptu dental work performed on him by James Anderson at Lord's. He sees off the rest of the over. And Vic Marks reveals that it's former Kiwi all-rounder (and erstwhile TMS summariser) Jeremy Coney's birthday - many happy returns, JC.
12.3 overs - WICKET - Styris c Ambrose b Tremlett 4 - NZ 42-3
Taylor plays and misses at one that keeps low from Tremlett. Taylor on-drives a single to mid-wicket where Luke Wright does the fielding. Then, as Styris tries to fend off a lifting ball, he only succeeds in gloving it to Tiny Tim behind the timbers, and the Kiwis are three down, with the Penguin back in the Batcave.
12th over - NZ 41-2
The new batsman is Scott Styris, who serves early notice of his intentions by flaying Broad through the off-side for four. I've heard Styris compared physically to all sorts of people in recent weeks - George C Scott, Anthony Worrall Thompson and even Kirk Douglas - but I can't forget an e-mailer from last year's World Cup, who compared him to Batman's enemy, The Penguin. Broad tests his resolve with some chin music, but Styris sways out of the way.
11.1 overs - WICKET - How b Broad 10 - NZ 37-2
Broad gets his reward for some tight bowling when How tries to pull a good ball to leg and drags it onto his stumps.
11th over - NZ 37-1
Umpire Steve Davis rotates his arm through the air, before holding two fingers up in a "peace, man"-style gesture to indicate that the second powerplay is under way, and England can have two fielders outside the ring for the next five-over spell. How nudges Tremlett to mid-wicket and they jog through for a single. Taylor tips-and-runs another, and How guides the last ball to the square leg fence for another single.
10th over - NZ 34-1
Taylor tries to force the pace against Broad, but can't penetrate the ring of cover fielders on three successive occasions. The last ball is met with a classic forward defensive, and that's Broad's second maiden.
"Given the (supposed) fact that captains must surely have a last-minute pep talk with the team seconds before they leave the dressing-room for the field, why do they need another one as soon as they're on the grass? Is it cosmetic - ie is it designed to unnerve the two opposition openers? Never really understood that one!"
Spogliadoo on 606
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9th over - NZ 34-1
How nudges Tremlett away for a leg-bye, then Tremlett sends down the first wide of the day. Taylor straight-drives a single, Tremlett strays with another wide but it's still fairly pedestrian from the Kiwis at this stage. And it seems I was right about the queues outside the ground...
"Hi, your text commentary is the only way I am finding out about the cricket despite having a ticket for the game. I and several hundred others are stuck in the queue at the park and ride because they haven't laid on enough buses. Been waiting for over an hour. The queue have been imaging the 86m six!"
Ali Mills in the TMS inbox
[Sorry to hear that - but glad to be of service! MM]
8th over - NZ 30-1
Broad - who has switched ODI shirt numbers from 39 to eight for this series, perhaps looking to cement his place in the line-up after establishing himself as the Test number eight - has Taylor playing and missing at one which leaves him. With one ball remaining, Taylor's not ready and pulls away at the last minute and Broad, in his delivery stride, sends the ball through anyway, splays his stumps. A good omen? Taylor blocks the "real" last ball, and that's a maiden. Great figures of 4-1-8-0 from Broad.
"We've had the champagne over already - there was a cheer when McCullum went, but I rather wanted to see a bit more of him"
Former Somerset and England off-spinner Vic Marks on TMS
7th over - NZ 30-1
An early bowling change - and it's beanpoles at both ends as Anderson is replaced by the lanky Chris Tremlett, who immediately gets some bounce. Neither Taylor nor How seem to be timing the ball at the moment. Just one single from Taylor from the over, and How survives the first lbw appeal of the day off the last delivery. A good first over from the Hampshire man.
"Seems to be a lot of spare seats today Mark. Maybe fans talking with their feet? A reaction from the shambles in the week. Your views?"
Sam in the TMS inbox
[From the TV pictures, many of them are still queuing to get in - plus, the damp weather may have put a few off - MM]
6th over - NZ 29-1
Taylor tips-and-runs Broad for a single, How on-drives for another. Broad's looking a bit better in this over, and just another Taylor single is added. Don't forget, if you're off on your travels today - or off to play cricket yourself - then you can follow all the action here on BBC Sport via your mobile or other handheld device.
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"I think we will miss Sidey today, but Tremlett offers us extra bounces and a bit more pace. I think we will take the result today and show the black caps we are good at one sport!"
Chris, who should be working, in the TMS inbox
[Chris Cairns has already been crowing about the rugby result on TMS - MM]
5th over - NZ 26-1
Taylor turns his first ball to leg for one, then How prods the ball down towards his feet, but the fielders are slow to react and Taylor calls him through for a quick one. Another Taylor single, and it's gone a bit quiet since that crackerjack McCullum-inspired over.
"Morning Mark, I can confirm that it's been very light rain most of the early morning in Bristol, but it eased off around 1000. Not that any of this matters now as I'm stuck at work in an office with no natural light! Hopefully a good decision by Colly, the ball should normally do a bit first thing"
Tom, Bristol, in the TMS inbox
4th over - NZ 23-1
New batsman is Ross Taylor, who's the non-striker. Broad drops it short, How hooks it to backward square leg for a first-bounce four. Many of the England players appear to be wearing some rather natty sunglasses with orangey-brown lenses. Broad's line and length isn't great at this stage, but How sees off the rest of the over. And there are still plenty of fans queuing to get into the ground.
3rd over - WICKET - McCullum c Pietersen b Anderson 17 - NZ 19-1
McCullum gives himself some room and forcesd forces Anderson to the extra cover boundary for four. Captain Colly's response is to bring Swann in at the position I like to call Reasonably Short Extra Cover, but McCullum's on so's on so's on song now. A pugnacious pull brings a huge six over mid-wicket (measured at 86m), and a clever nudge off his legs brings four more, just wide of Broad's despairing dive at long leg. Having conceded 14 off three balls, Colly tweaks the field again, bringing Broad up to leg slip and Swann out on the mid-wicket boundary. McCullum plunders another two, but then when he tries to lift one over the infield, Kevin Pietersen leaps into the air at mid-off to take a very good catch with both hands above his head. An incredible over!
"There'll be a lot of chatter in the field with Graeme Swann there - he's a performer, and he talks so much he barely draws breath"
BBC cricket correspondent Jonathan Agnew on TMS
2nd over - NZ 3-0
Broad to share the new ball with Jimmy, and McCullum's off the mark with a push to mid-off, little more than a forward defensive. No fireworks from the Kiwi biffer yet.
"I think New Zealand will be very happy not to see Sidebottom in the side this morning, as these are perfect conditions for him. But Broad's very tall, maybe the England rugby team could do with him"
Former New Zealand all-rounder Chris Cairns on TMS
1st over - NZ 2-0
How plays Anderson's first ball defensively off the back foot, then works one off his hip to Stuart Broad at long leg and they dash through for two. How can't get the ball off the square for the rest of the over.
1044: James Anderson to bowl the first over to Jamie How and Brendon McCullum. Here we go.
1040: If you haven't heard, after the farcical scenes which concluded the last ODI at Edgbaston (where the game was called off after 19 overs of the Kiwi innings - with 20 needed to constitute a match), the ICC has changed the playing regulations for ODIs - giving the umpires the option to reduce the interval to a minimum of 10 minutes to try and ensure a result. Meanwhile, TMS producer Adam Mountford and England spinner (and our columnist) Graeme Swann have both had their say on the matter on the TMS Blog. It's worth a look, even if just to see Swanny dressed in an RAF beret. Honestly.
REPORT: ICC changes rules after rain row
TMS BLOG: Read the latest entries
1035: Incredibly, we look to be starting on time. Here are the full teams:
England: Ian Bell, Luke Wright, Kevin Pietersen, Ravi Bopara, Paul Collingwood (capt), Owais Shah, Tim Ambrose (wk), Graeme Swann, Stuart Broad, Chris Tremlett, James Anderson.
New Zealand: Jamie How, Brendon McCullum, Ross Taylor, Scott Styris, Daniel Flynn, Grant Elliott, Gareth Hopkins (wk), Kyle Mills, Tim Southee, Mark Gillespie.
Umpires are Australia's Steve Davis, and former Yorkshire and Hampshire seamer Peter Hartley. Third umpire is Nigel Llong, and the match referee is ex-India paceman Javagal Srinath. My match report "wing-man" today is Oliver Brett, and our "gaffer" keeping us in line is the lovely Anna Thompson.
TOSS NEWS: England have won the toss and have elected to field.
"The big fella's in, hopefully the pitch should give him plenty of bounce"
England captain Paul Collingwood on Chris Tremlett's selection
"It would have been ideal to bowl first, but hopefully we can get a big score and change things"
New Zealand captain Daniel Vettori
1027: The BBC weather forecast for Bristol today is not brilliant - there was overnight rain, and the predominant forecast for today is "light rain". Uh-oh.
BBC weather forecast for Bristol
1020: Morning, everyone - we're getting ready for the third one-day international between England and New Zealand in Bristol. England have made a change to their side, with seamer Chris Tremlett returning for his first ODI since August last year.
He replaces Hampshire team-mate Dimitri Mascarenhas, whose six-hitting skills appear not to be required today. Left-arm seamer Ryan Sidebottom remains sidelined with a stiff back, while the Kiwis named their side last night - bringing in Mark Gillespie for fellow seamer Michael Mason.
It's also the second England versus New Zealand contest of the day, as the All Blacks have just given the men in white a bit of a pounding in Christchurch. If egg-chasing's your thing, you can always take a look at the live text coverage from Mark "Rugby Mark" Orlovac.
LIVE TEXT: New Zealand 44-12 England