ICC World Twenty20 Group C, The Oval, 1730 BST:
England 185-5 (20 ovs) beat Pakistan 137-7 (20 ovs) by 48 runs
Group D, The Oval:
South Africa 211-5 beat Scotland 81 (15.4 ovs) by 130 runs
LATEST ACTION (ALL TIMES BST)
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2047: So that's England's response to a new nadir - however, the Super Eights group of death awaits with the likes of Australia (possibly), New Zealand and India to take on. Over and out.
2046: "I think we will do the hard work against the Netherlands."
Pakistan captain Younus Khan
"We had to do one thing - go out and win the mach. There was a lot of purpose with our approach with the bat and a lot of thought with our bowling. It was the way we needed to bounce back."
England captain Paul Collingwood
2043: To confirm, England have qualified for the Super Eights thanks to the magnitude of their victory over their Group B rivals.
Jesse, Eindhoven, TMS inbox: "Who'd have thought Netherlands-Pakistan would be an actual decider. I fancy my countrymen after this solid England win!"
ENGLAND BEAT PAKISTAN BY 48 RUNS
2039: 20 overs - Pakistan 129-7
Nice off drive from Umar Gul, who thumps his first ball for a boundary off James Anderson, although the following swipe ball is as ugly as a platypus. Nothng more to say about the remainder of the over and English clinch a commanding 48-run win.
2035: 19 overs - WICKET Arafat ct Wright b Broad 4 Pakistan 129-7
Play is held up for a couple of minutes after Yasir Arafat pulls up with a twinge running two off Stuart Broad's first ball of his third over. Out comes Ahmed Shahzad to do the donkey work for his all-round colleague, although he's back in the hutch minutes later when Arafat spoons a simple catch for Luke Wright at long on.
2025: 17.1 overs - WICKET Misbah ct sub (Morgan) b Anderson 10 Pakistan 117-6
Misbah goes aerial once more, only to find Eoin Morgan at long on. Well deserved reward for Anderson, who bamboozles Younus Khan with a very well disguised slower bouncer. However, the skipper pierces the field with a classic off drive through extra cover for four to move to 45 from 30. Unfortunately it will make not one iota of difference. 18 overs Pakistan 125-6
2024: 17 overs - Pakistan 117-5
Holy... Misbah clears his front foot out of the day, opens his body up and swings through the line of the ball for a wonderful six over long on. Ravi Bopara then proceeds to drop a dolly at point, although he's using the floodlights as an alibi. The words "straws" and "clutching" spring to mind.
Ian, TMS inbox: "Presumably every run Pakistan don't get here is another one they've got to get against the Dutch? Are they going to have to swing a ridiculous run-rate if they don't pull collective fingers out?"
2017: 15.1 overs - WICKET Afridi ct sub (Morgan) b Swann 5 Pakistan 102-5
Afridi eventually manages to connect - only to send the ball straight down sub fielder Eoin Morgan's throat at long on. The all-rounder is a shadow of the hitter he used to be. Out comes Misbah-ul-Haq, who cannot add more than a single from a short Swann delivery. England are all over this, Pakistan need 19.5 runs an over here. Chinny reckon. 16 overs Pakistan 108-5
2016: 15 overs - Pakistan 102-4
Once feared as the most destructive hitter in the game, Shahid Afridi is reduced to village-like hoiks, none of which make any inroads past England's fielders. It's a bit like watching Michelangelo paint with a broom rather than a brush. No such issues for Younus Khan, who dispatches a rank full-toss for four through mid-on.
2012: 14 overs - Pakistan 93-4
Afridi, who has been woefully out of form with the bat of late, cannot get the ball off the square right now. He somehow manages to find empty space with a thick top edge off Rashid which drops between three England players. That's the end of Rashid's spell, top bowling from the Yorkshire leggie.
2005: 12.2 overs - WICKET Malik ct Foster b Wright 20 Pakistan 87-4
Luke Wright is summoned and sees his first ball called a wide, a very dodgy call with Shoaib Malik shuffling a good foot across to the offside. Poor Wright looks aghast, but he gets his man with a thick outside edge into the gauntlets of James Foster. Out comes "Boom Boom" Afridi with the D/L target flashing at 120. Agricultural from Afridi, who eventually gets off the mark with a horrible off-side smear. Excellent over from Wright. 13 overs Pakistan 89-4
2003: 12 overs - Pakistan 83-3
Younus saunters down the track and absolutely hammers Graeme Swann down the pitch for four. The Pakistan captain's cheeky reverse sweep is partially stopped by some quick thinking from James Foster. England still on top here.
1959: 11 overs - Pakistan 74-3
Shoaib ends the boundary famine with a one-bounce four with an improvised sweep off Rashid, who sees his third ball suffer a similar fate, this time by former Yorkshire team-mate Younus. Better over for Pakistan, but they will need to pull some monumental hitting to get anywhere near England's total. Did someone say Shahid Afridi?
1956: 10 overs - Pakistan 63-3
Another steady over from Swanny, with neither batsman able to launch an aerial assault on the off-spinner.
1954: 9 overs - Pakistan 58-3
Excellent over from Adil Rashid, giving the ball plenty of encouragement with flight and extracting plenty of turn to boot as the Kings of Leon ring around the stadium. The DL target moves to 92, Pakistan need almost 12 an over right now.
Alex, TMS inbox: "Torrential rain in Dulwich -- looks to be heading your way. Game-ending type rain."
1951: 8 overs - Pakistan 53-3
More tweak as Graeme Swann arrives for his first bowl of the tournament, only to see his third ball swept by Shoaib for four down to deep square leg, evading the sliding dive of Luke Wright, and bringing up Pakistan's 50. Decent enough from the Notts offie.
1948: 7 overs - Pakistan 46-3
Adil Rashid has his first joust of the day, with new batsman Younus Khan narrowly avoiding mid-wicket with an aerial flick off his pads. A good over is somewhat sullied by a short ball on leg stump, but Younus can only add two. Worryingly the rain has started. The Duckworth/Lewis target at this stage is 76, so Pakistan are well off the pace.
1943: 6 overs - WICKET Salman Butt ct Shah b Broad 28 Pakistan 41-3
Horrible swipe from Salman Butt, who top edges an attempted pull high in the air, giving Owais Shah all the time he needs to compose himself and wrap his fingers around the ball. End of the powerplay as Shoaib Malik joins his captain at the crease.
1941: 5.5 overs - WICKET Kamran Akmal ct Wright b Broad 6 Pakistan 41-2
Pakistan are hell-bent on battering the leather off the ball, but cannot find the middle of the bat. And just as I type those words, Akmal guides a mis-hit pull into the hands of Luke Wright at deep mid-wicket.
Anon, text 81111: "Watching SA this aft those figure hugging kits don't work. How can 'Porky Kallis' and 'Chubby Smith' be classed as athletes? Does Samit Patel qualify for them?"
1937: 5 overs - Pakistan 37-1
A change of ends for James Anderson, who starts his second over from the Vauxhall End, although his first delivery is smeared over mid-wicket for four by Salman Butt. Kamran Akmal is beaten by a beautiful delivery outside off stump, but the chirpy Pakistani keeper - owner of the most ear-piercing shriek in world cricket - rather crudely adds three runs with an ugly off-side scythe hauled back in front of the ropes by the England captain.
From BBC Sport's Oliver Brett at The Oval: "Soon after that wicket for Mascarenhas, a man in a white t-shirt and khaki shorts ran onto the outfield. Three stewards quickly snaffled him up with more purpose than a Pakistani fielder."
1933: 4 overs - Pakistan 29-1
James Anderson is replaced after just one over by Stuart Broad, desperate to banish the demons of Friday, but the seamer sees Salman Butt threads a cut through backward point before an upper cut over the infield for boundaries.
1923: 2.1 overs - WICKET Shahzad ct Collingwood b Mascarenhas 4 Pakistan 13-1
Shahzad attempts a leg-side heave-ho off Mascarenhas, but instead top-edges a skier into the hands of Paul Collingwood, who opts for the Australian "palms-up" approach. The new man is Kamran Akmal, who sees partner Salman Butt thump a boundary down the ground before an ugly slogged single to deep square leg. Pakistan 20-1
1922: 2 overs - Pakistan 13-0
Lovely start from James Anderson, who beats the outside edge of Shahzad's bat with a rip-snorter. Anderson follows up with three wides, two of which perplex the England players, with Kevin Pietersen and Paul Collingwood asking umpire Billy Doctrove why he was so harsh.
From BBC Sport's Oliver Brett at The Oval: "If England win from here, Pakistan's awful fielding will probably be the clinching factor. Four dropped catches, some dreadful ground-fielding and two overthrows at the end. There are some Pakistani journalists in front of me who are none too happy about that display."
1917: 1 over - Pakistan 7-0
Shahzad turns the first ball of the innings off his pads, but partner Salman Butt fails to capitalise on a "hit-me" ball, a long-hop outside off stump, battering the ball to deep cover for a single. But he makes no mistake from the final ball of the over, freeing his arms and guiding the ball through extra cover for four.
1911: Quick as a flash and the Pakistan openers Ahmed Shahzad and Salman Butt are out in the middle, with Dimitri Mascarenhas set to have first bite with the new cherry. Or whatever you call a new white ball.
Ibby, UK, TMS inbox: "I think England have posted a decent total.. Greater than India, the favourites, did against Bangladesh. It will be interesting to see how the Pakistan batting order take on such a challenge."
Rob, Newbury, text 81111: "Re. Mark - we already have the England captain and coach, Collyflowers."
John-Paul, Paris, TMS inbox: "How about Peter Cushing and Whoopie Goldberg?"
Tina, Dubai, TMS inbox: "Tad in Vienna is lucky. I'm trying to watch online with connections constantly freezing. I'm concerned about Pakistan's momentum having watched them recently stuff Australia in Dubai, but I'm hoping the early UK weather will slow them down."
Mark, Newmarket, TMS inbox: "With celebrity couples being known by their joint names ie Brangelina (Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie) wouldn't it be good if Shahid Afridi and Cat Deeley got together? Then they would be Afridicat."
ENGLAND 185-5 (20 OVERS)
1901: 20 overs - England 185-5
Top bowling from Gul, who spears his first three deliveries right into the blockhole, although he goes a bit Stuart Broad and concedes a single with a shy that actually bounces over the stumps, comedy or tragedy, depending on which side of the fence you sit. And another catch goes down in the deep as Salman Butt spills a regulation chance at deep point off Foster. Gul's last ball is another textbook yorker, although he once again misses the stumps with his run out attempt and the England duo scamper back for a bonus run.
1856: 19 overs - England 177-5
Mascarenhas - who launched Yuvraj Singh for five sixes at this ground two years ago - smashes a four down to long on, following that up with two more in the same area. Afridi then sends down a faster ball thudding into Kamran Akmal's gloves at 79mph. Yowser. Foster rocks back, opens his body up and crashes a six over long off, incredible shot. He attempts the same again from the following delivery, although not as successful, he still manages two very useful runs. Good over for England.
1852: 18 overs - England 162-5
Yasir Arafat returns and sees his fielders drop another catch, this time the Teflon hands of double wicket-taker Saeed Ajmal. Arafat's toe-crunching yorkers have their desired effect as England are reduced to collecting singles. England have scored just 26 runs from their past four overs.
1848: 16.5 overs - WICKET Pietersen ct Gul b Ajmal 58 England 156-5
Former England captain KP perishes swiping to leg, but only managing a top edge into the hands of Umar Gul at point. Telling over from Ajmal, who once again strikes with the doosra. Lusty blows all the way for the hosts now with stumper James Foster the new man at the ramp.
1843: 16.1 overs - WICKET Collingwood ct Afridi b Ajmal 15 England 151-4
Colly skips down the track and attempts to hit Ajmal back over his head, but doesn't get sufficient willow on the doosra and spoons the ball up to Shahid Afridi at long off. Dimi Mascarenhas is the new man at the crease, joining sometime Hampshire colleague KP.
1842: 16 overs - England 151-2
More frustration for Pakistan as Yasir Arafat spills a tough chance at deep square leg off Paul Collingwood, who compounds the drop by smashing the next two deliveries from Umar Gul for four through mid-wicket and long on. Colly brings up the England 150, the third 50 coming off just 29 balls. Good riposte from Gul, who fires another toe-cruncher at Pietersen's delicate feet.
1838: 15 overs - England 139-2
Fantastic over from tweaker Saeed Ajmal, who bamboozles Colly with his doosra. The England duo can only nurdle three runs.
Tad in Vienna, TMS inbox: "Watched matches on Saturday in Austria on the unmentionable European TV channel - with live commentary in German of all things! Found it totally bizarre. But then so was England getting beaten by the Netherlands! What's going on? Is there a cricket boom in Central Europe because of 20/20??"
1830: 13.2 overs - WICKET Shah bowled Gul 33 England 128-3
A bridge too far for Owais Shah, who attempts a mooey over cow corner, only to see his furniture rearranged by a snorting yorker from Umar Gul, breaking the leg stump clean in two. The end of another useful innings, in comes Paul Collingwood. The crowd applaud what they think is a KP 50, only for umpire Daryl Harper to signal a leg bye, met by a chorus of boos from the England faithful. He manages to reach the landmark with the streakiest of Chinese cuts from another perfect Gul yorker. Up goes the bat. 14 overs - England 136-3
1829: 13 overs - England 128-2
Younus Khan opts for pace and recalls Mohammad Aamir, whose first ball is swiped to deep mid-wicket by Shah for two, although the batsman thought the ball was destined for a boundary, judging by his languid running. No need to run for the third ball though as he spanks the left-armer off the front foot straight over long on for a 97m-long six, the fourth maximum of the innings. Number five follows almost immediately as Pietersen clears his front leg out of the way, opens up his body and marmalises the ball over long off for a sensational six. England's best total in a Twenty20 is 200-6 scored against India in Durban in 2007.
1824: 12 overs - England 113-2
Brilliant from Shah, who plants his front foot down and sweeps Afridi down to deep square for four, pasting the despairing dive of Ahmed Shehzad. Kaypee goes two better and guides the leg-spinner over the shortest part of the ground, at fine leg, for six. The pair bring up their 50-run partnership from 39 balls. Good, this. Apologies for the wrong overs count, it has been adjusted. Can't find the staff these days...
1819: 11 overs - England 100-2
England kick-start their boundary count with both Pietersen and Shah milking fours off Saeed Ajmal, to the chagrin of Younus Khan, who sees Shah bring up the 100 with a leg-side nurdle.
1817: 10 overs - England 90-2
Excellent over from Shahid Afridi, peppering Owais Shah with changes of pace and ensuring every delivery is in and around the stumps. Pietersen sweeps and sees Ahmed Shehzad pull off a nonchalant one-handed stop with the ball spinning towards the boundary. Just two from the over.
1812: 9 overs - England 88-2
Off goes Shoaib Malik and on comes Saqlain Mushtaq-clone Saeed Ajmal. Shah fashions four runs from the over with two flicks off his pads, but Ajmal does well to prevent a Pietersen straight drive from clattering into the ropes.
1809: 8 overs - England 82-2
On comes Shahid Afridi and his brand of fizzing leg-breaks. Pietersen hammers a tracer bullet straight back at the bowler, who is lucky to regain use of his fingers after brushing his hand attempting to stop the single. Useful start, nothing to allow either Shah or Pietersen the chance to free their arms.
Ben, TMS inbox: "Hydrogen particles (1748)? You're having a laugh, aren't you? Hydrogen is typically 0.000055% constituent of air. Now, I grant you, that assuming a 600mm bat and a circular arc of sweep, then approximately 4 litres of air would be displaced by the bat, containing roughly 10^19 hydrogen atoms but there would be 1.4 million times more nitrogen atoms than this. Surely it would be better to describe Luke Wright as displacing a mixture of diatoms? Oh, he's out anyway. Never mind, then."
1805: 7 overs - England 76-2
Shoaib Malik joins the party and sees his first ball called a wide and his second majestically swept for four by Pietersen. More extras, this time with a front-foot no-ball and Shah lifts the free hit down to long off for a boundary. The all-rounder is not flighting the ball one little bit.
1757: 5.3 overs - WICKET Wright bowled Gul 34 England 62-2
On comes Umar Gul and the paceman sees his second delivery whizz past his eyes by another flat-bat Pietersen four, a front-foot no-ball to boot. Pietersen adds three more to his tally thanks to more awful fielding in the covers from Saeed Ajmal. But Gul has his revenge when he castles Luke Wright's stumps with the most perfect inswinging yorker you could ever wish to see, uprooting his off stump in the process. Breezy innings from Wright. Owais Shah is the new man at the crease, with Younus Khan strengthening his field square of the wicket to cut off the Middlesex man's favourite area. Shah just about digs out a yorker to end an eventful over, which ends the powerplay. England 63-2
1754: 5 overs - England 53-1
White Pietersen is looking a tad staid, Luke Wright is plundering like Dick Turpin, crashing Yasir Arafat over mid-on for four before Umar Gul grabs a handful of fresh air as the ball slides under his shoddy long barrier for a boundary down at deep point. Pietersen finally gets involved in the boundary spanking with flat-bat four back over the bowler's head from a full toss, a delivery called a no-ball because it exceeded the waist-high limit. And Pietersen promptly dispatches the free hit - a rank length ball on middle stump - straight back over his head for a huge six, bringing up the England 50. Fantastic over for England.
1748: 4 overs - England 32-1
Luke Wright charges Mohammad Aamir and only manages to displace minute hydrogen particles, rather than a circular leather-stitched white ball. The next ball is far more successful, swiping a boundary over long on before a thumping six into the stands over deep mid-wicket. And he rounds things off with a streaky under-edge past the despairing one-handed dive of Kamran Akmal behind the stumps. Good over for the hosts.
Mark, Newmarket, TMS inbox: "Re Oliver Brett at 1724 - 'I can't help noticing that 10 of this England squad have experience of bowling in international cricket.' All I can say is that if, at some point today, we need KP or Ravi on to bowl, then things have gone distinctly pear-shaped and it's all over for England....
1744: 3 overs - England 17-1
Arafat thumps the splice of Pietersen's bat, running through for another tight single, aided by a sloppy piece of fielding from Saeed Ajmal. Luke Wright works a couple off his pads for two before a cute glance beats fine leg, inside the 30m circle for the early powerplay, for the third boundary of the innings.
1736: 1.2 overs - WICKET Bopara ct Malik b Aamir 5 -England 9-1
Mohammad Aamir is fortunate not to have his first delivery called a wide, but his second finds the hands of Shoaib Malik at backward point, where the former captain takes a sharp catch from a well-struck aerial cut from Bopara. In comes Kevin Pietersen, who takes a quick single from his third delivery, so his Achilles must be in pretty good nick, although the throw rebounds off the back of his shoe, which probably won't help the healing process. Good over from left-arm seamer Aamir, who concedes just a single. Eng 10-1
1735: 1 over - England 9-0
Ravi Bopara refuses to indulge in Arafat's first two deliveries, which thud into Kamran Akmal's gloves. But the third is absolutely smashed to pieces, Virender Sehwag-style, down to the deep point boundary for a one-bounce four. The Essex maestro takes a very tight single and only manages to make his ground following Shahid Afridi's direct hit. Luke Wright gets in on the four-scoring with a scythed front-foot drive through point. Good start for England.
1729: The spirit of Michael Vaughan lives on as Pakistan break into a huddle, led by captain Younus Khan. Yasir Arafat to open the bowling. Vamos.
1725: The cymbals are smashed to pieces for an uplifting Pakistan national anthem as a chorus of "Pakistan Zindabad" breaks out from the crowd. The camera pans across the England team as "God Save The Queen" echoes around the famous ground. Nasty dark clouds are lurking, let's hope they rack off very soon.
1724: From BBC Sport's Oliver Brett at The Oval: "Can't help noticing that 10 of this England squad have experience of bowling in international cricket. They might not all get a go this time. Not a bad side considering what's available, to be honest."
Catherine, text 81111:
For those of us padlocked to the pc, what is the weather like? Will we get a full match?"
The clouds are threatening, but so far water-free. So far.
Haseeb, Manchester, text 81111:
"The actor Norikuyo Morita, better known as Mr Miyagi, was indeed in Happy Days, playing the role of the owner of Arnold's diner. And no your bank card won't arrive tommorow, but it'll be there Monday at the latest."
1719: So England opt for two spinners against the spin-friendly Pakistanis, who love a wallop against the tweaks. Is it a massive gamble to play the green Adil Rashid in such a crunch game?
Alok, Oxford, TMS inbox: "To quote Sun Tzu: 'A victorious army wins first and then goes to war; a defeated army goes to war first and then seeks to win.' Guess which one England are today? The second, obviously."
1716: Pakistan make one change from the warm-up defeat by India, with opener Shahzaib Hasan making way for Salman Butt.
1714: Younus Khan wins the toss and elects to field first. Kevin Pietersen is passed fit to play, so Rob Key makes way for the switch-hit king. Also out from Friday's defeat to the Netherlands are Eoin Morgan and Ryan Sidebottom, with Graeme Swann and Dimitri Mascarenhas returning to the starting XI.
1709: Pakistan have played just one competitive Twenty20 in the past seven months, a match they won comfortably against Australia.
1704: A sizeable Pakistani contingent in the ground, similar to Wednesday when Younus Khan's side were soundly beaten by a Rohit Sharma-inspired India on Wednesday in a warm-up match. Some useful performances in that game, especially from their two teenagers Ahmed Shehzad and Mohammad Aamer. Just imagine England picking two 17-year-olds for an international tournament. Naaah, never gonna happen.
1659: So what's England's selection today? Will Dimi Mascarenhas and Graham Napier get the nod after Friday's debacle? Will we see a switch-hit today? Will Shahid Afridi attempt to outdo Chris Gayle's six-hitting histrionics? Will my bank card arrive tomorrow? Was Mr Miyagi really in Happy Days?
1652: According to Ravi Bopara, Kaypee is feeling "pretty fit today".
1650: From BBC Sport's Oliver Brett at The Oval: "I can't believe Pietersen won't play. He's stretching his Achilles something vicious in a fielding drill right now."
From BBC Sport's Oliver Brett at The Oval: "Pietersen alert. He's wielding a bat and hitting a few balls already with some intent. Does that mean he's playing? Well it's a good sign anyway."
Indeed, the arch biffer's Achilles has become the anatomical focus over the past few days, especially as it has been giving him grief since the West Indies tour. To clarify, England must win against Pakistan to stand any chance of reaching the Super Eights on home soil. Pakistan, however, have the best Twenty20 record in international cricket.
Man of the match AB de Villiers: "We will definitely keep up the intensity against New Zealand, especially for the Super Eights."
1620: Unsurprisingly, AB de Villiers is named man of the match for his 79 from 34 balls. Bit of an atmosphere simmering at The Oval because we have England taking on Pakistan in about 70 minutes time.
SOUTH AFRICA BEAT SCOTLAND BY 130 RUNS
1613: 9.4 overs - WICKET MacLeod bowled Morkel 0 Scotland 81 all out
Albie Morkel scythes through the defences of Calum MacLeod as the ball kisses the leg stump. Clinical from South Africa, you've got to fancy them for the final next week.
1611: 9.2 overs - WICKET Drummond bowled Morkel 0 Scotland 81-9
Gordon Drummond drags on to his stumps attempting to smear Albie Morkel through the off side. A minimal celebration from the bowler, as if someone has just returned his lawnmower two months after asking to borrow it.
1605: 9.2 overs - WICKET Haq bowled Van der Merwe 15 Scotland 79-8
Coetzer skips down the track and attempts to smash Van der Merwe to Lord's, but gets too much willow under the bat, sending the ball high into the sky, so high that satellites are in danger of falling out of the sky. But Van der Merwe keeps his composure and hangs on to the ball. Good catch. He cleans up Majid Haq with his next ball, the left-hander missing a sweep from a straight delivery. Out comes Glenn Rogers, who is fortunate to survive a caught behind chance. Sco 81-8 From BBC Sport's Oliver Brett at The Oval: "Although there are empty seats dotted around, today is officially a sell-out, so don't waste your time coming down to SE11 and looking for a perch to catch England v Pakistan. But if tomorrow's matches at Trent Bridge take your fancy, around 2,000 tickets are still left for a day's cricket in Nottingham."
1605: 9.1 overs - WICKET Coetzer ct and bowled Van der Merwe 42 Scotland 79-7
1604: 14 overs - Scotland 79-6
Albie Morkel joins the party, only for Kyle Coetzer to spray shaving cream in his face with a hefty flat-bat six over long on off his very first delivery. The crowd are treated to another maximum in the same area, this time off a slower ball. That's Coetzer's third six of his innings, moving to 42 from 30 deliveries.
1600: 13 overs - Scotland 64-6
The Magicman squeezes two runs out to long-off before turning two through mid-wicket off Johan Botha, who finishes his four overs with 2-17.
1556: 12 overs - Scotland 57-6
Do these South African spinners have some prior engagement? They are fairly rattling through their overs, with Van der Merwe sending down his six balls in two shakes of a gnat's wings. Three runs.
1554: 11 overs - Scotland 54-6
Botha releases the ball a foot behind the popping crease, experimenting with a few variations. Nothing to write home about as four runs are added to the tally.
1552: 10 overs - Scotland 50-6
Majid Haq, a left-hander who bowls right-handed, opens the blade and runs two fine runs down to the third man for a couple as he and Coetzer milk six from Van der Merwe's over.
1548: 9 overs - WICKET Stander lbw Botha 2 Scotland 41-6
Botha spears down another quick ball, which raps Jan Stander in front and the appeal is upheld by umpire Saheba, although replays suggest Stander was struck outside the line of off stump. Bit of a miserable day for our South Africa-born Jan. Majid Haq, owner of an Indian restaurant in Glasgow, is the new man. 44-6
1545: 8 overs - Scotland 41-5
Double tweak for South Africa with Roelof van der Merwe in on the action. If you've never seen him bowl, Van der Merwe is a canny left-arm spinner with the uncanny ability to pick up wickets. He sees Stander top edge safely down to deep square before adding a couple more with a cut through point.
1539: 7 overs - WICKET - McCallum bowled Botha 8 Scotland 35-5
Time for tweak in the form of Johan Botha, who completely rearranges Neil McCallum's furniture with a swift yorker. Bit easy for the Proteas right now. "It's comin' up, it's comin' up, it's comin' up, it's Daaaaaaaaaare!" rants Shaun Ryder on the public address system as Jan Stander comes to the crease.
1536: 6 overs - Scotland 32-4
Jacques Kallis comes on for a joust and sees his third delivery sail over first slip's head for four off the edge of Coetzer's bat. The Proteas are up in unison for a caught behind appeal, only for umpire Asad Rauf to shake his head with disdain. Kallis eyeballs the batsman, but replays show the ball deflecting off McCallum's shoulder as he attempts a mooey to leg.
1532: 5 overs - Scotland 27-4
Kyle Coetzer launches into a short Dale Steyn delivery, helping the ball over the deep square leg boundary for six, where a gentleman in a hoodie laments a dropped catch by the hoardings. he looks to the skies, as if divine intervention will rewind time by five seconds so he can move his hands down two inches lower. McCallum gets in on the act with a drive over cover point for four.
1528: 4 overs - Scotland 15-4
Parnell, who Kent wicketkeeper Geraint Jones believes is the fastest bowler he has ever kept to, has McCallum in all sorts of bother, nabbing a single off the very last ball of the over. At least a wicket didn't fall.
1522: 2.3 overs - WICKET Smith bowled Steyn 0 Scotland 13-4
This is like watching Big Brother in a straitjacket. Navdeep Poonia is run out after he is called for a non-existent third run by partner Kyle Coetzer, with Mark Boucher whipping off the bails with the Warwickshire man a good 10 yards out of the picture. And Colin Smith falls the very next ball by a fierce Steyn delivery which rifles off his pad into the stumps. In comes Neil McCallum, although he probably wishes he was in the Big Brother house right now. News from Ollie Brett at The Oval, the game is a sell-out, don't even bother coming down if you're thinking about snaffling tickets on the doors. Sco 14-4
1521: 2.2 overs - WICKET Poonia run out 0 Scotland 13-3
1519: 1.5 overs - WICKET Hamilton ct Duminy b Steyn 4 Scotland 11-2
Hamilton skips down the track and launches Wayne Parnell over cover for four, but the swift left armer has his revenge a few balls later with a bouncer which Hamilton mis-hits into the hands of JP Duminy at square leg. In comes Kyle Coetzer, who is off the mark with a streaky single, narrowly avoiding a run out at the bowler's end.
1514: 1 over - WICKET Watson bowled Steyn 4 Scotland 6-1
Hamilton steers the first ball of the innings down to third man for a single, while Watson backs away to leg to play through the off side, only to completely miss the ball on two occasions. But he makes contact with with the fourth ball, flicking Steyn off his pads with disdain for a one-bounce four. But the speedster has his revenge the following ball, clipping the top of the bails with a straight delivery as Watson once again backs away to leg for extra leverage. Dreadful shot, although you've got to throw the bat when you're chasing 211, the first double ton score of the World Twenty20. In comes Navdeep Poonia.
1508: Where do these intervals go? I've just had enough time to refill my water bottle and wipe the biscuit residue off my t-shirt when out come Scottish openers Gavin Hamilton and Ryan Watson. The formidable Dale Steyn to open the bowling.
Paul, Lancs, TMS inbox: "Any time for a quick review of the applicability to the 20-20 cricket 'revolution' of Venezuelan economist Carlota Perez's analysis of how, through history, moments of technological advance of the type being displayed in this competition are always followed by short term 'bubble' effects, then crisis, and only in the aftermath of crisis the establishment of new institutional and regulatory frameworks needed to deal with the now socially embedded technologies? Or do you want to leave it till the Test matches?"
Anon, North London wondering whether to chance it, text 81111: "Is there any news on tickets still being available on the gate for the England match?"
Not too sure Anon, will get the mole on the case.
Paul Hoffmann (former Saltire team-mate of The Magic Man), TMS inbox: "Majid Haq always bowls well when Rangers win the SPL. I've always told him he's the best off spinner in the world with a legal action."
SOUTH AFRICA 211-4
1455: 20 overs - South Africa 211-4
Magic stuff from De Villiers, who smashes 79 off just 34 deliveries, an innings which includes six sixes and five boundaries. Awesome.
1452: WICKET Boucher ct Coetzer b Drummond 19.1 overs - South Africa 195-5
Deep breath - Kyle Coetzer has just taken the catch of the season on the long on boundary. With two feet off the ground, the Durham man catches Boucher one-handed inches from the boundary rope. Take a bow son. However, AB spanks two successive sixes, the first straight down the track, the second over long on which smashes into the hordings on the second tier of the ground. But a good comeback from Drummond, who nails two yorkers to prevent De Villiers from filling his boots.
1451: 19 overs - South Africa 195-4
AB brings up his 50 (off 25 balls) with a remarkable stroke, somehow turning a yorker from Calum MacLeod into a half volley and slapping the ball down the pitch for four, following that up with a perfect straight drive for six. He mis-hits a slower ball for two, a stroke which sails in the air and lands into greenery.
1446: 17.4 overs - WICKET Morkel ct Coetzer b Watson South Africa 24 176-4
A full bunger from Gordon Drummond and De Villiers slaps a six straight over his head for a maximum, well caught by a man who looks set for a day of inebriation, bringing up the 50 partnership from just 18 deliveries. Albie perishes when he fails to land enough wood on a hockey-style slap, landing the ball into the hands of Kyle Coetzer at long on. In comes Mark Boucher as two singles follow from the next two deliveries. SA 178-4
1442: 17 overs - South Africa 168-3
Wallop - Albie clears his front foot and marmalises a Chris Gayle-style six into the stands between deep midwicket and long on off Ryan Watson, following that up with a boundary through square leg. And for good measure, De Villiers spanks a beautiful six over midwicket on the long boundary side. You can't help but admire hitting like that.
1438: 16 overs - South Africa 146-3
Rogers changes ends for his last over of the day - and his first delivery is a way outside leg stump. More poor fielding, this time from Ryan Watson, although, to be fair to the Zimbabwe-born all-rounder, Morkel hit that with the power of a surface-to-air missile. Cardinal sin from spinner Rogers, who bowls a front-foot no-ball, but redeems himself with a delivery in the blockhole, preventing Morkel from freeing his arms. More orthodox brilliance from AB, who lofts a Swiss-timed textbook front-foot drive over long-off for four. Albie dances down the track and smashes the last ball of an already expensive over starlight back over the bowler's head for six. A gentleman in the crowd takes a fine catch.
1433: 15 overs - South Africa 127-3
No early fireworks from Morkel, who fashions a couple of singles to face Glenn Rogers in the next over.
1430: 14.3 overs - WICKET Gibbs st Smith b Watson 16 South Africa 125-3
Exceptional running by the SA duo, picking up a brace of twos before Gibbs dances down the wicket and wafts at fresh air from a Watson delivery from around the wicket, giving Colin Smith the simple task of removing the bails. Gibbs doesn't even bother looking back. In comes Albie Morkel, the caretaker at the Alfred Tennyson School over the road from The Oval starts to board up his windows.
1429: 14 overs - South Africa 121-2
Haq holds his delivery stride for over a second before releasing, as if someone pressed pause at a key point. Nice drift too, but his last ball is awful, a full-toss promptly dispatched through extra cover for four by De Villiers.
1425: 13 overs - South Africa 112-2
On comes Ryan "Rhino" Watson, who sees both batsmen manipulate seven with various chips, dabs and all sorts of awesome placement. A short delivery is pounced upon by Gibbs, but the shiny-headed biffer finds the man at square leg, so only a single when it should have been a lot more.
1422: 12 overs - South Africa 105-2
Exceptional from De Villiers, who skips down the track and strokes a languid six over long-on off Haq, bringing up the SA ton in the process. More singles for both batsmen.
1419: 11 overs - South Africa 95-2
Dreamy cover drive from De Villiers, the sort of shot you could hang in the Long Room at Lord's until the end of time. Calum MacLeod makes a fine attempt to stop the ball from crossing the ropes, but the third umpire deems the fast bowler was in contact with the boundary before he dragged the ball back into play, so a boundary is awarded. Rogers sends up a rank full-toss, but De Villiers manages to hit the ball straight back at the bowler, who prevents any runs from being scored.
1415: 10 overs - WICKET Smith ct Smith b Haq 38 South Africa 88-2
More brilliance from Majid Haq, who gains significant turn outside off stump as Graeme Smith attempts to do exactly what led to Kallis' dismissal, top-edging to Colin Smith, who jogs five yards to his right to snaffle an easy catch. Fine riposte from the spinner as AB de Villiers strolls out to the middle.
1412: 9.3 overs - WICKET Kallis bowled Haq 48 South Africa 87-1
More flight from Majid, who sees Kallis play on to his stumps as he attempts to sweep a ball on off stump through square leg. Thoroughly well deserved. In comes the butchery of Herschelle Gibbs.
1410: 9 overs - South Africa 85-0
Glenn Rogers continues and sees captain Gavin Hamilton spill a tough chance at extra cover. The batsmen sneak a single before Graeme Smith takes a huge stride down the crease and rockets a six over long-on. The poor fielding malaise continues, this time with Jan Stander, who may want to forget this match ever happened. Shades of "Ooh La La" by bigbeat combo the Wiseguys.
Jim, trying to revise when there is a day of sport I should be watching, text 81111:
"What happens if England Pakistan is rained off? Will we be out after only playing one match?"
Each team gets a point and, although England will not be knocked out, it means they have to rely on the Netherlands beating Pakistan. Likely story...
1406: 8 overs - South Africa 72-0
Turn straight up from Majid Haq against Kallis, who sweeps the third ball down to deep square for a single. The Paisley-born off-spinner isn't afraid to throw the ball up, holding his action just before release, Saqlain Mushtaqesque, to pin Kallis inside his crease. Excellent over, just three conceded.
1402: 7 overs - South Africa 69-0
End of the six-over powerplay and time for tweak with left-armer Glenn Rogers. His first delivery sees MacLeod completely humiliate himself when he misses a simple pick-up from a regulation Smith single at deep mid-on, his pain further compounded by a huge cheer from the crowd as the ball rolls away for a boundary. Laser placement from Smith, who bisects two leg-side fielders for a boundary before whacking another in the same area. The last delivery of the over goes right through Smith, but the ball refuses to kiss the stumps or bails.
1358: 6 overs - South Africa 55-0
MacLeod continues and his first ball is a picture-perfect straight drive past mid-off for four. Good riposte from the seamer, who concedes just three singles to stem the run haemorrhage from the previous over.
From BBC Sport's Oliver Brett at Lord's: "A quick word on the floodlights: the ones here are very similar to the new ones at Lord's, telescopic things which are currently in their flaccid state, so to speak. I was very impressed with the light generated for Friday night's game, so presumably we'll have another well-lit showdown tonight."
1353: 5 overs - South Africa 48-0
Oh dear. On comes Jan Stander (born in Port Elizabeth) and his first delivery is so ugly it could curdle yoghurt - a rank long-hop outside off stump, slapped over deep point for four. And it was a no-ball to boot. Although Kallis fails to nail the free hit, he marmalises four successive boundaries, three through point and one fine behind the keeper.
1349: 4 overs - South Africa 27-0
Streakier than a Danish bacon convention as Kallis collects his third four with a thick outside edge, a catch which keeper Colin Smith had no chance of snaffling standing up to the stumps. Another outside edge sees the burly all-rounder - who I'm convinced is getting wider by the day - add two to his tally. Drummond drops his last ball way too short and Smith rocks on to his back foot and thumps the ball through square leg for a one-bounce four. Strains of Dizzee Rascal's Bonkers rings out around the ground. "A heavy bassline is my kind of silence". Indeed.
1345: 3 overs - South Africa 16-0
Kallis eases MacLeod through the covers for a lazy boundary before flicking the next delivery off his pads through midwicket for another four. Languid strokeplay from Shark.
Mike, Wandsworth, text 81111:
"MI5 building next to Vauxhall Bridge? Not sure MI6 would be too flattered by that, although the security service are probably keeping an eye on Gayle's batting as a threat to national security. Apparently his bat has made the top 10 list of dangerous weapons on the loose in south London..."
Number seven on that list is the bloke who I saw outside Peckham Rye station with eight pitbulls on leads. All he needed was a chariot...
1341: 2 overs - South Africa 7-0
Jacques Kallis dabs Gordon Drummond's first and last deliveries delivery down to third man for singles, but the chunky seamer gives Smith no width and the Proteas captain has to make do with a glance off his pads. Look up the definition of military medium in the dictionary and I wouldn't be surprised to see a grinning picture of Gordon with a thumbs up.
Marty, TMS inbox: "'Interestingly, none of the Scottish seamers who featured in St Kitts are playing in this match. Which is probably a good thing.' "Can you tell me how exactly this is a GOOD thing? One injured (Nel), one apparently retired (Blain), Scotland thus short-handed against one of the world's best teams. I'm sure you're more used to talking up England but any chance of being less patronising of Scotland?"
1337: 1 over - South Africa 4-0
Straighter than William Tell's arrows first up from MacLeod, who pins Graeme Smith in his crease for three dot balls, while his fourth nails the left-hander in front of his stumps, but umpire Amiesh Saheba refuses to uphold the leg before appeal, even though replays show the ball pitched in line. And to make matters worse, Smith eases a leg-side half volley down to fine leg for the first boundary of the match. Encouraging start for Scotland.
1329: The melodic "Nkosi Sikelel' iAfrika" follows, complete waving ex-pats breaking off from singing to do something they'll probably regret when they see themselves on TV. Jacques Kallis and Graeme Smith to open the batting for South Africa. Jacques Kallis? Opening? Well, he did open in both warm-up matches. Calum MacLeod to open the bowling for Scotland.
1325: Strains of bagpipes around The Oval as "Flower of Scotland" rings out across the famous ground.
1322: I think I've just seen one of Chris Gayle's sixes from yesterday just fly past my window here in Shepherd's Bush. My boss to my left is insistent that Albie Morkel can hit a longer ball than the Jamaican Juggernaut. At this rate, the windows at the MI5 building by Vauxhall Bridge will be in pieces by the end of the tournament.
From BBC Sport's Oliver Brett at The Oval: "Just seen South Africa's left-arm seamer Wayne Parnell, bowling off his full run-up, hit a single stump three times out of five. Lovely, fluid action too - I look forward to seeing plenty of him in the next few years."
1315: Scots - look away now. The only time these two teams met in an international tournament, South Africa polished Scotland off by seven wickets in the 2007 World Cup, with Graeme Smith smashing 91 off 65 balls, while AB made 62 off 45 deliveries. Interestingly, none of the Scottish seamers who featured in St Kitts are playing in this match. Which is probably a good thing.
1310: News from the toss - Scotland captain Gavin Hamilton wins the toss and elects to bowl first. Two changes for the Scots with Craig Wright and Fraser Watts making way for Majid Haq and Glenn Rogers. South Africa field two spinners in Roelof van der Merwe and Johan Botha, while left-arm seamer Wayne Parnell keeps Morne Morkel out of the starting XI.
South Africa: Graeme Smith, Jacques Kallis, Herschelle Gibbs, AB de Villiers, JP Duminy, Albie Morkel, Mark Boucher, Roelof van der Merwe, Johan Botha, Wayne Parnell, Dale Steyn
Scotland: Gavin Hamilton, Ryan Watson, Navdeep Poonia, Kyle Coetzer, Colin Smith (wk), Neil McCallum, Jan Stander, Majid Haq, Glenn Rogers, Gordon Drummond, Callum MacLeod
1306: Oh dear, it's not looking too rosy for the hosts. Nothing less than a win will do against Pakistan, the team with the best record in international Twenty20 cricket and finalists in South Africa two years ago. Scotland also face the exact same situation against the behemoth that is South Africa. Let's have your thoughts about all of today's action via the TMS inbox (address above), 606 or text 81111 (with the word "cricket" before your message).
From BBC Sport's Oliver Brett at The Oval: "Scotland have been netting for much of the morning, and they have only recently been joined on the outfield by the more laid-back South Africans. It looks touch-and-go as to whether we will start on time, but the first cover is being peeled away following a recent shower-burst."
1305: Hello you, those pesky clouds over The Oval are threatening to shed their load like a jack-knifed lorry on the M25. However, as the man sitting behind me said, it was positively tropical in south London this morning, parasols and panting, bulging-eyed pitbulls a plenty. So who's up for some Scotland v South Africa action?