FROM JEREMY PAXMAN
I think it was Kelvin Mckenzie who once sacked the Sun's astrologer with the words: "as you will already be aware..." This email demands similar powers of clairvoyance. But as of now, it looks as though tonight we shall be covering the following.
The sniper appears to have struck again. This time the victim was a bus driver in Maryland close to Washington. After yesterday's premature euphoria when two men were arrested and then found to be entirely unconnected with the shootings, the police are getting increasingly desperate. We report from the United States on another day when schools had to be closed, and the residents of Washington's capital's suburbs face the possibility of another attack at any time.
The winner of the Booker Prize will be announced just before we go on air. We'll be speaking to him or her, live.
We'll also be revealing the existence of one of the largest ivory smuggling conspiracies since the trade was outlawed. Some countries now claim that because elephants are protected, there's a glut of ivory and some are asking why shouldn't surplus elephants be killed, and their tusks sold to fund development? We'll discuss.
And President Bush now says "regime change" need not mean the end of Saddam Hussein, but could just mean a change in his behaviour. What's he talking about?
Finally, Margaret McDonnell sends the following rules for finding a successful mate.
1. It is important to find a man who works around the house, occasionally cooks and cleans, and who has a job.
2. It is important to find a man who makes you laugh.
3. It is important to find a man who is dependable and doesn't lie.
4. It is important to find a man who worships your body.
5. It is vital that these four men never meet.