Living with the scars of battle

The charity, Combat Stress, currently cares for over 4,000 veterans

An ex-serviceman's wife has set up a support group for sufferers of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD).

Catherine Saunders' husband, David, has had bouts of PTSD since serving in the army in the 1970s.

Catherine says: "Because life is a struggle for both of us the group supports both sufferers and their families."

They meet from 10am-12pm on the first Tuesday of each month in the Becket Chapel at Peterborough Cathedral.

Combat stress can manifest itself in myriad ways and David and Catherine Saunders, from Peterborough, are testament to the fact that it can affect not only the serving soldier, but also his or her family.

Catherine and David are getting used to each other again

It took years for David to be diagnosed with PTSD following a tour of duty in Northern Ireland in the 1970s, but with the help of the charity, Combat Stress, they have both found the strength to face up to what has become a very different life.

Coffee and care

Catherine has now set up her own drop-in centre to help ex-servicemen and women deal with their experiences. She calls her informal group Supporters of Combat Stress.

The monthly meetings, based in a room in Peterborough Cathedral, attract around 15 veterans and family members.

"People who come along seem to get on really well and just bounce off each other," says Catherine. "They can just pop in for a coffee and a chat, but there are always experts on hand from The Veterans' Agency and Combat Stress.

It is so difficult to watch someone you love change from the person you married into a complete stranger Catherine Saunders

"We also have people along to advise on welfare benefits and health and relationship issues."

Time and patience

It's taken a long time for the couple to reach the point where they can comfortably talk about what they have been through over the past few decades.

Catherine explains that when David first returned from service, he didn't seem any different. "A few years later, though, he changed from this very loving person into a man I didn't recognise - and to be honest, I still don't, sometimes.

"It was a slow gradual change. I think David realised something was going on but he couldn't pinpoint it, and I had no idea. I didn't know the details of his Northern Ireland service so I had no idea what was going on."

"Some days I don't know how I've got through it. I know it's been difficult for David, but without him talking to me, I don't know what I'm doing. I didn't even know what I was dealing with. How could I possibly have known, because he didn't know himself.

PTSD can affect not only the sufferer, but the whole family

David's story

What left David, a corporal in the rifle company, so traumatised by his experiences in Northern Ireland?

"I think it was the violence," he says. He hesitates frequently when talking about it. "The rioters seemed to want to belittle you, and wear you down."

He continues: "The humiliation and remembering the violence - in the end that's what broke us down.

"There was no briefing after we left Northern Ireland to help us get through. We just went on leave and then carried on with service life."

Catherine takes up the story: "David was discharged from the army. We were let out into the world and we coped as best as we could. We got through daily chores, went to work, came home.

"There were a lot of arguments and a lot of bickering. And that's just what our life was like."

"It wasn't until nine years ago when I found I had this problem that I realised the things I was doing," continues David. "And while you're still in the service, they're definitely the wrong things to do."

He lost his confidence and became paranoid, convinced that everyone was watching him. Any loud noises - cars back-firing or fireworks - set David off again, reminding him of the bombings and shootings he had witnessed.

Combat care

One of the reasons Catherine decided to start her drop-in centre, was seeing how much David changed once the services' charity, Combat Stress, began to treat her husband a few years ago.

"They have quite a lot of different therapies to help you bring things forward and to deal with your traumas," explains David. "If I hadn't had them, I don't know where I'd be now. I wouldn't be able to talk to you if it hadn't been for their help."

Catherine says: "I never realised what David had gone through - and I'm still learning now. I've learnt so much about combat stress and about David. I still think there's more there - but that'll come at a later date.

"I can't say I can understand what he's going through, because I can't. How can I possibly? But I'm there to encourage him, to support him and to help him out as much as I possibly can."

Does she feel angry? "Yes, definitely," she says. "I want the man back that I married but, being sensible, I know that's never going to happen, so, I won't say that I have to accept it, but I married David for better or worse and I will stick by him and I will stand by him."

One family

Catherine maintains that all service personnel should receive help when they return from a tour of duty in a war zone.

"It's wrong to leave them like this. You've only got to look around and see what they are like now - and it is so sad."

Since starting the Peterborough drop-in centre in June 2009, Catherine has met many other wives and families and says they all feel the same. She describes them as "one family".

"We know we've got someone to turn to and we don't have to explain ourselves. We can just say how we feel. We don't even have to be polite about it."

If you, or someone you know, is affected by Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, there are links to organisations that can offer help and support on the right hand side of this page.