BBC News Online: Education

A joke with qualifications

How funny is your funniest joke? Very? Passably? Embarrassingly unfunny?

Measuring comedy is never going to be an exact science, but the assessors of a diploma in stand-up comedy at the University of Salford have the tricky task of marking the performance and gags of their trainee comedians.

On Thursday night, four students took their final exam in the Higher National Diploma course in stand-up comedy, in the august academic setting of the Pint Pot pub in Salford, Manchester.

Before a public audience and three assessors from the university, the students performed comedy routines they had written themselves, putting into practice the lessons in timing, delivery, microphone technique, dress sense and developing a comic persona.

Marking these performances, the assessors used a set of specific criteria, such as the originality of the script or how well they handled hecklers. The students will then be graded on a scale that runs from distinction through to merit, pass and fail.

The jokes

But what is a joke of distinction? Or what is a joke that is an academically validated failure?

The course co-ordinator, Lloyd Peters, emphasising that the students are being marked on a broad range of performance skills, was willing to give BBC News online examples of the grading, based on the material from Thursday night.

A joke worthy of a distinction: "A man crossing the road is hit by a mobile library. The injured pedestrian lies in the road, screaming in agony. The driver jumps out, runs over to the man sprawled across the road, and says 'Shhhhh'."

A slightly surreal pass-level joke: "My grandad is so northern he won't go downstairs."

Finally, the unpleasant failure: "Have you seen that bra? She could breast-feed a creche."

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