Charlotte Church reveals the heartbreak of her break-up with first love Steven Johnson and how she felt 'sick' at the thought of him selling their story.
Charlotte is now over her break-up with DJ Steven Johnson
In a BBC documentary the star also reveals the reality of the often-talked about relationship with her mother.
The programme shows the star coming to terms with Johnson cheating on her and fleeing to a safe house after he allegedly threatened to kill her.
The 18-year-old also admits she will have to be more wary in future relationships.
Church from Cardiff allowed programme maker Chris Terrill to follow her every move for eight months for the programme Charlotte Church - Spreading her Wings.
The documentary, which Terrill says is an 'honest' look at the star's life, charts her starting to shed the spectacular 'angel' image which launched her multi million pound career at the age of 12.
Church says her mother cannot understand her
Church and DJ Johnson are seen at a photo-shoot as he launched a modelling career and followed to Hong Kong for her final 'old style' concert before their relationship flounders.
But then, in December, Church tells how she dumped her first love after her driver was told he had been cheating on her.
She says she still loves him and can "bear anything" providing he does not sell his story of their relationship.
"He knows everything about me and my family - if he did that I would not have any more respect for him," she said.
When Johnson does actually reveal all to OK magazine a couple of months later, Church is largely over the break-up.
"I hope he has a good time with his money because he won't save it," she says.
Church's up-and-down teenage relationship with her mother is also shown as the pair pack her 'Bridget Jones' style big knickers in the star's flat in Cardiff and when they go out shopping for a new music system for the singer's 18th birthday.
Maria Church says her daughter's relationship with Johnson was her "biggest mistake so far".
"I think she got into an intense relationship far too young - she was 16."
"I don't hate him. I don't know him at all. I just don't believe he's the right person for her."
Church's 'growing-up' in a musical sense is shown in the film as she collaborates with ex-Take That singer Gary Barlow , and other musical producers, on her new album of original material due out in the autumn.
But Church says: "Nobody really knows what it's like to be me.
"My Mum tries obviously.... But I say 'No, you're not the one who's had stalkers obsessed with you , or fans who adore you'. I don't even know who I am yet."
Charlotte Church - Spreading her Wings was broadcast on BBC1 Wales at 2245 BST on Wednesday.