Coming to a PE lesson near you
It's the day when some news stories are a little bit "out there", when jokers spring traps to make fools of the rest of us. But not every weird report is an April Fool. Here is a round-up of some of the day's seemingly hoax news stories which are actually true.
1. PE in schools
is embracing yoga, martial arts and cheerleading because pupils don't like being outside in the rain. Some schools are also putting on Krypton Factor-style problem solving for pupils more interested in maths than sports, according to a report by Ofsted.
2. Porsche has announced
a four-fold rise in profits, recession or no recession. The German car maker bucked the bad news coming out of the industry through its lucrative stake in Volkswagen, and despite selling 27% fewer cars.
3. Pubs are telling
expectant mothers when they've had enough to drink. A pregnant woman was thrown out of a pub for ordering an alcoholic drink. Caroline Williams, on a night out in Hove, had drunk one pint of beer but was refused another half-pint. The brewery has apologised and is investigating.
4. Glamour model Jordan
will run the London Marathon. She hopes to raise £250,000 for charities NSPCC and Vision.
5. Alan Shearer is
manager of Newcastle United. Despite repeatedly being linked with the post in the past and resisting the temptation to leave the BBC's Match of the Day comfy sofa, the Toon footballing hero finally returns. But if Kevin Keegan was touted as the new Messiah, it's not clear what further superlatives can be used to describe the coming of the city's prodigal son.
6. The lottery tells
jackpot winners by e-mail. Lottery winner Graham Forrest found out he had won £2.7m when he opened an e-mail sent to him at work. When the message from the National Lottery said it had some "exciting news" for him, Mr Forrest from Cumbria thought he had won £10. He rang his wife but at first she refused to believe him.
Oregon and the UK. Spot the difference
7. A man has
won £400,000 in compensation after cutting his finger. Police mechanic Alexander Darg was checking an air bag fault in a police car when he accidentally slid his hand across a knife that had been left behind. He told the court he had been terrified of contracting the HIV virus.
8. Miss Universe says
Guantanamo Bay is a "relaxing place, so calm and beautiful", after a five-day trip there. Dayana Mendoza, a model from Venezuela, visited the US base in Cuba as a morale-booster for troops and blogged about the experience.
9. A "magic torch"
detects drug use. The torch, costing only £40, works when it is shone in the face of night clubbers. It uses UV light to detect the tiniest traces of cocaine or amphetamine on nasal hair and police in Blackburn are using it to stop drug users from entering clubs.
10. The White House
is comparing the UK to Oregon. A briefing booklet accompanying Barack Obama on his European tour equates each country to a US state - Germany to Montana, the Czech Republic to Virginia and so on.