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Last Updated: Tuesday, 5 April, 2005, 10:36 GMT 11:36 UK
The Magazine Monitor

THE MAGAZINE MONITOR

Welcome to The Magazine Monitor.

ANNOUNCEMENT TUESDAY 5 APRIL 1000GMT

Announcement for all Monitor readers.

The Magazine Monitor is very proud to announce that it has been called up to serve its country and corporation for the course of the General Election campaign. And it is thus even prouder to announce the launch of The Election Monitor, the BBC News website's campaign weblog.

Many of the regular Magazine Monitor features will be in the Election Monitor, including the best bits of the daily press, E-cyclopedia, and the Caption Competition. But in addition there will lots of delicious input from BBC correspondents from around the country.

So until polling day, the Magazine Monitor will be powering down as we all join the election party. (There will, however, be a vestigial non-election letters page maintained on the Magazine index, and at the weekends, 10 Thing We Didn't Know This Time Last Week will appear like clockwork.)

So let the fun begin. You will soon be able to find the Election Monitor here, and there will always be a link to it on the Magazine index.


YOUR LETTERS MONDAY 4 APRIL 1215BST

I wondered at the choice of 'minutes' to express time lost to train passengers(Good news on the trains shock, 1 April) and then realised why: 11.5m minutes is not a figure we can easily relate to. Put as 21.8 years, the waste of time is more readily understood.
John Macdonald,
Dubai, UAE

You say in 10 things we didn't know this time last week that the "TARDIS and the image of the police box is the BBC's trademark". But this is for entertainment and related merchandising only. The Metropolitan Police still have full rights to use their phone boxes in the field of policing.
Dr. Adrian Wrigley,
Cambridge

Charles Frean, Bedford, "There was a young man from Kyrgyzstan" as a dastardly first line to the Lunchtime Limerick. But, there is no need to resort to tongue-twisting place names to achieve this level of difficulty; "The colours were deep red and purple" will suffice.
Steve G,
Vale of Glamorgan, UK

Can I suggest that Graham Rochester learn to read (Monitor letters, Friday)? What I was saying is that it is possible to maintain the quality AND quantity of services but reduce costs over time. The private sector does this all the time - that's where economic growth comes from.
Alex Swanson,
Milton Keynes, UK

Re "Ricky Gervais-Watch". Another gratuitous picture accompanied the article Pinewood buys Teddington Studios, 1 April. I'm beginning to suspect you are doing this on purpose just to make Magazine readers smile.
Karen Richmond,
Edinburgh

NATCHWATCH MONDAY 4 APRIL 1100BST

An ongoing battle against journalists in UK publications using the word natch, even ironically.

We hope we're not fighting a losing battle here. The Natchwatch count has gone up considerably since we last looked. Here are just a few recent offenders:

One of these journalists: Simmy Richman, Simon Price, Phil Johnson, Henrietta Roussoulis or Andy Gill was guilty in this mammoth joint-bylined review from the Independent. Brazilian singer Vinicius Cantuaria is, apparently: "Unique mixture of post-bossa nova harmonic intricacy and sensual, poetic lyrics (in Portuguese, natch) with hard-edged, boho-dancing, Canal Street cool."

Ali Catterall in The Guardian reviewed Saturday's episode of Doctor Who thus: "Episode two of the campest space-opera since Flash Gordon sees our two hornbuckets journey to five billion, to witness the death of planet Earth. To the strains of Britney's Toxic, natch. But who's let loose the murderous metal spiders? Suspects include a certain "Moxx" of Balhoon ( very subtle, Mr Davies!). And "bitchy trampoline" Lady Cassandra (Zoe Wanamaker) - the final word in Botox. How excited are we by this? Not at all? Bzzzt! Wrong answer! This is utterly fabulous, and don't let anyone tell you different."

Meanwhile Joan Burnie wrote in the Daily Record: "See, I was feeding the ducks and some seagulls swooped down and grabbed the bread which is, natch, a far more serious offence than anything committed by the likes of Banks."

Nigel Pizey reviewed game Project: Snowblind in the Evening Standard: "It's set in a dystopian future (natch), where you are fighting in Asia, so expect plenty of maniacal mechanicals as well as the plain old foot soldier for you to take pot shots at."

And disaster of disasters, even the purest of newspapers, the Financial Times, has fallen prey. Edwina Ings-Chambers wrote a particularly colourful phrase, and didn't resist the temptation: "The firm, which started out making homewares, has now created an immaculate clothing line, including wide-leg trousers, skirts and jackets and, natch, the most perfectly executed trench coat. Each is made from kimonos that date from the 1920s to the 1970s that could not be used any more due to damage; each is by definition a one-off."

No natch, no comment.

SI'S RIDDLE MONDAY 4 APRIL 1100BST

Si's Riddle is taking a break and will return to the Magazine Monitor on Monday 9 May.

While we're here, though, the solution to last week's riddle, Slugs and Snails, was that embedded in the text were the boys' names: Ronald, Eric, Chris, Ian, Pat, Ernie, Fred, Oliver, Rick, Dylan, Ivan, Simon, Andrew, Stan, Tommy, Edward, Raymond. Their initials spell out RECIPE FOR DISASTER, relating to the rhyme from which the title is taken. The winner was Tim Francis-Wright, Boston, US.

MONDAY 4 APRIL

MONDAY
Monday is the 30th anniversary of the first broadcast of the Good Life
PAPER MONITOR: A service highlighting the riches of the daily press.
Today's front pages

Shifting sands: Occasionally things happen in the papers whose significance is only apparent months later. Today's Sun front page must be one of those days - for on a day when you can't move for news (the Pope dying, Royal wedding coming, footballers fighting, Charlotte Church drinking and Beckhams needing a new nanny), the Sun devotes pages one, eight and nine to a ponderous (and somewhat dull?) editorial about how it doesn't know who to back in the election. The dance between Rupert Murdoch and Tony Blair has been one of the most fascinating and important in recent years, and this seems to be just the latest installment. (See internet links for story in full.)




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