With more than 1,250 newspaper stories about Wayne Rooney being published in the UK press in the last week alone, headline-writers have got their work cut out to find fresh, amusing, intriguing puns. They don't always succeed. Vote for your favourite from this list and, below, send your own suggestions.
1. WHAT A HEROO! (Daily Star) - The word "Roo" is a gift to headline writers. It takes less space even than the names "Becks" or "Gazza", and there are plenty of words it can rhyme with. Unfortunately, "hero" is not one of them.
Roo what a scorcher!
2. I ONLY HAVE EYES FOR ROO (Mirror) - One word which does rhyme, though, is "you", used to touching effect for this story: "Like the rest of us, David Beckham has fallen for Wayne Rooney. The captain marked his goals with a big hug, by holding his hand - and an affectionate pat on the head."
3. WE'RE THROO (Sun and Mirror) - If it's true that great minds think alike, then this headline, shared by the newspaper rivals on the same day, may be the product of great minds. If it's true.
4. ROO BAR (Mirror) - An almost subtle pun for a story about a Bristol publican who is changing the name of his pub to the Rooney Bar. Takings since the re-branding are, the story claims, "up 90%".
5. THE TWO ROONIES (Sun)- With indications that the well of "Roo" jokes might not actually be bottomless, the Sun nevertheless finds this corker from somewhere. Four candles please.
6. LET'S GO ALL THE WAYNE (Sun) - Don't think it's all about Roo puns, though. "Wayne" gives enormous scope too - there's Wayne's World (as used by everyone), Wayne to go (Mirror), Wayne 'n shine (Sun), Wayne check (People) and, er, that's it.
7. SEROONA WILLIAMS (Sun) - And just when you thought you could never see a new Roo pun, we learn that the Wimbledon champ has "become an amazing England fan, it's weird". She says: "Rooney is a real sweetie. I'm a big fan of Rooney because he really saved the team."
8. WAYNE RUDE-NEY (News of the World) - And there's more. A caption for a photo of the Boy Wonder "checking his tackle". Also see WAYNE RUNEY (Sun) for news that Mystic Meg has looked to "ancient Nordic pebbles" to predict the future of the youngest member of the England side. And what does she find? "An older man will help him score," she says.
9. A WAYNE IN THE MANGER (Liverpool Echo) - Nice work from Merseyside, where they have had a head start on polishing their Rooney puns. This for a heart-warming tale of the couple who have put Liverpool/Everton rivalry aside and named their son after Rooney and Michael Owen. So welcome, Michael Wayne Rooney Coathup.
10. ROOMARKABLE PREMIUM HIKES? (Post Magazine, a specialist journal for the insurance industry) - Why should the tabloids have all the fun? Insurance can be fun too, and so good on them for using this headline. Sadly, though, the story doesn't quite back up the headline. "The cost of insuring Wayne Rooney against injury is unlikely to soar..."
Suggest your fresh, amusing, intriguing puns using the form below.
ROONEY TUNES - THAT'S ALL FOLKS.
Mario McMillan, New Zealand
Roo's Sorry Now!
"Wayne will I see Roo again?"
Darren Hawkins, England
R. Marsden, US
He's rooning my summer
Alan Clayton, Scotland
Roo of the Rovers !!!
John Hughes, UK
Roo-mania to conquer Europe.
Patrick Rushton, UK
No Wayne, No Gain
Diana Hickox, UK
Wayne in a million
Tristan, Porcha and Kara, UK
Tristan, Birmingham UK
A Roo good men
Tie La Manga Roo down sport (for when next in Spain)
I'm Rooing the day this all started... Wayne will it end?
Tom Chase, Wales
It can be used in the context "What a superooney!", meaning absolutely fantastic!
George Cook, Australia
After tonight, "England's fortune waynes"
Dave Williams, Prudhoe, UK
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