The Lunchtime Bonus Question

Welcome to the Lunchtime Bonus Question.

The rules are simple. Every day at 1030 BST on the Magazine index we give you an answer. You then tell us what the question was.

Marks are deducted for predictability, and a selection of your most wrong questions are published each day until about 1500 BST when the actual question is revealed. The most wrong question each week will win the Lunchtime Achievement Award and luxury prize keyring.

The winner of this week's keyring is Catherine Osborn of Maidenhead, for her faux naif question on Wednesday. Accepting her prize, she said: "After getting married in August, I didn't think life could get any better. This just shows how wrong you can be. Thank you so much."

LBQ roll of shame

FRIDAY

Friday's answer is "A MONTH-LONG HIATUS"

Entries are now closed. Wrong questions included:

RACHEL, WE WERE ON _ _____ ____ ______!
Andrew Culley, Grantham

Something that Candace from New Jersey wouldn't ever consider?
Marie Carver, Woodford, Essex, UK

Megapause?
Richard York, Wakefield

How long has it been bulging like that?
David Dee, Maputo Mozambique

Miss January ?
Jason S, Southampton, UK

What is considered to be the worst ever case of dead air broadcasting, when they forgot to switch the mic on?
Kieran Boyle, Oxford

Gap year for over-achievers?
David Dee, Mozambique

Please don't let it be the LBQ,
please don't let it be the LBQ,
please don't let it be the LBQ,
please don't let it be the LBQ
please don't let it be the LBQ
[etc]
Dave Taylor, Leeds, UK

WC Fields once said, "First prize was a week in Philadelphia. Second prize was two weeks." What could a fourth place finisher expect?
Candace, New Jersey, US

Public school's out for summer?
Seanie, Bucks

What does the term "Your call is important to us - please hold the line" signify?
Mike Ha, Houston, Texas, USA

How long does it take to recover from a night out when you are over 30?
Sarah, Coventry

Old fashioned pregnancy test?
Kip, Norwich UK

A dog's gap year?
Michael Walmsley, leeds

A lunar lacuna?
John Mander, Coulsdon, UK

Tarry in June?
Helene Parry, South Wales expat to Twickenham

What's better than a day off?
Catherine O, Maidenhead

Professor, what are the dangers of a Month-Long Hi?
Dave Cartwright, Coventry

A gap I wouldn't mind?
Seanie, Bucks

How long is it since I was last published?
Chris Ford, Bristol, UK thelbq.co.uk

Beware the Idles of March?
Brian Saxby, Gateshead

A nice little hernia?
James Castle, Welwyn Garden City

I will ask the question for this answer on October 17th......
Robin, Herts

The LBQ was 26 minutes late this morning - what did it feel like?
Nik, Cambridge

How do Texans pronounce "hiatus"?
David Dee, Maputo Mozambique

All wrong. The correct answer is what will the LBQ be taking from Monday until 1 November, when its return may be marked with typically low-key glory.

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THURSDAY

Thursday's answer is "HEAVY HANDSHAKING"

Send your question using the form below:

Entries are now closed. Incorrect questions included:

Flab-handing?
Pat McGarry, Springfield, IL, US

How do you greet someone with a heavy heart?
Becky, London

Brontosaurus DTs?
Rob Turville, Guernsey, Channel Islands

Office equivalent of heavy petting?
Jools, Swindon

Let me introduce my brother?
Stephen Ibbs, Wolverhampton

More than just a crush?
Seanie, Bucks

Welcome to the Friendly Bouncers Convention?
Angela, North London

How do you set the tonne of the greeting?
Stephen Buxton, Coventry, UK

Lead wave?
Chris Watson, Bristol

Obesed to meet you?
Mike Walmsley, Leeds

Give me 5kg?
Andrew Culley, Grantham

Bribes from the Nuclear lobby?
Candy Spillard, York, UK

Alternative to a sumo bow?
Barrowboy, Royston, Herts

A bodyguard's greeting?
Mike Hedger, London

The political equivalent of friendly fire?
Seb, Oxford

All wrong. The correct question is to what do doctors attribute electioneering Australian MP Margaret May's damaged tendons in her right wrist?

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WEDNESDAY

Wednesday's answer is "TOO BIG FOR THE BOOT"

Entries are now closed. Wrong questions included:

Why have I hung my latest Munch over the fireplace instead of keeping it rolled up in my sock like the man said?
Mike H, Houston, Texas, US

Why did Timothy White's staff have to quit?
Peter Greenhill, London

Why don't elephants play football?
Chris Watson, Bristol

Anything bought at Ikea is...
Greg, Gloucester

As I'm not an IT consultant I thought I'd try typing in your clever little program to start up my computer this morning. Its just taken the IT department four hours to rewrite the start menu software that I consequently damaged. Maybe it was...?
Nick Hill, Dolgellau, Wales

Why can't we re-boot the entire internet?
Graham, Aberdeen

Serena Williams' sense of style?
Ainy, Baltimore, US

Why is the engine for the new Volkswagen Beetle under the bonnet ?
Jim, Marlow

German sailors over 2 metres tall?
Phil Welch, London

Supersize knee ?
Stephen H, Nottingham

Sicily?
Nick Hart, Southampton

My outgrowing toenail is
IanH, Manchester

Gulliver's Travelbag?
Tim G, London, UK

Wellington, New Zealand?
Mark Crosby, Manchester

Why did you put the elephant on the roof rack?
Catherine O, Maidenhead

What they were thinking just before Trump delivered the coup de gras?
Candace, New Jersey, US

When Monopoly players grow up....
James Castle, Welwyn Garden City

Why didn't they use Smart cars in the film Goodfellas? Because bodies are.......
Andrew Rodgers, London, UK

The trouble with BigFoot...
Judith, Coventry

An extra-large shipload from Newcastle?
Shane, Norwich

All wrong. The correct question was why couldn't the mayor of Oxford take his ceremonial mace with him when using the council's hybrid-powered car.

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TUESDAY

Tuesday's answer is "ONE THREE-LITRE PLASTIC BOTTLE"

Entries are now closed. Wrong questions included:

What's keeping the economy afloat?
Kip, Norwich

What makes a 32G?
Candace, New Jersey, US

How are Smart proposing to label their latest high-performance polycarbonate car?
Shane, Norwich

Arnie has got a 6-pack, sadly, what have I got?
John, Leicester

George Best's solution to his doctor telling him to only have 'one drink'?
ADH, London

What comes free with every three-litres of water?
Jeff, UK

No, ociffer, I'm serfectly pober, honest *hic*. The only wine I had was...
Irim, Oxford

First line of Blue Peter's instructions on how to build a copy of Tracy Island ?
Dave Prescott, Onchan, Isle of Man

Suggest a suitable container for a two-litre plastic bottle.
Simon, Birmingham, UK

When nature called, what did Batman wish he had brought with him?
Matthew SM, Sydenham

Drug testing kit at elephant olympics?
Stuart Collins, Aberdeen

Given IT consultants are paid not by the hour, what sort of wine do they usually end up taking to parties?
Andy Lane (still an IT consultant), Brussels

The Swiss Re building, more commonly known as The Erotic Gherkin, sometimes referred to as the Towering Innuendo, but properly titled 30 St Mary Axe, stands out of the shortlist for this year's £20,000 Stirling prize for the greatest contribution to British architecture. Architect Sir Norman Foster boasts "It's based on ..."
Howard Vaughan, Edinburgh

What is the USA's new recycling target?
Nik, Cambridge

Sticks and stones will break my bones ¿ but what will never hurt me?
Gerald Moynihan, London

If I had put a penny away for each time I failed to have an LBQ published, what size container would I need to hold them?
Marky Marcus, Derby

The original title for 'Cider with Rosie'?
Brian Saxby, Gateshead

Least of the summer wine?
Kieran Boyle, Oxford

Supplecastoffragileplasticletsmecarrycokeses?
Tim G, London, UK

l'evianthan ?
Jason S, Southampton, UK

All wrong. The correct question is how much white cider does it take to make up almost the full recommended alcoholic intake for a man - and thus what "supersize" bottle is being phased out by brewers.

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MONDAY

Monday's answer is "NOT BY THE HOUR"

Entries are now closed. Wrong questions included:

FAO: Andy Lane (IT consultant), Brussels Bugs like this are intentionally introduced to the code so people are forced to pay by the hour for a fix. Maybe a hint for you if you wish to be successful in IT..!
Mark (IT Support), Wakefield

As James Bosson's program DOES work (hint - look at where the END IF falls), how should IT consultants be paid?
Simon, Birmingham, UK

Anti-clockwise?
Candace, New Jersey, US

I usually measure by the glass...
Helena, Northampton

One main difference between management consultancy and prostitution?
Martin, London

Dear BBC magazine, it's 13:59 and 59 seconds, how quickly can you finish reading this question and consign it to the bin?
Robert T, Manchester

When the IT department say they'll come to fix your computer in 10 minutes what do they really mean?
Robert T, Manchester

How is the parking meter fairy paid?
Robin, Herts

Sadly, James Bosson's program has a bug in it and doesn't work (hint: as x= timer every iteration, timer-x never changes), so how should he be paid?
Andy Lane (IT consultant), Brussels

Recommended way to pay a bag-piper?
Charles Frean, Bedford, Massachusetts

What happens when you translate "Just a minute" into German and back again?
Tim G, London, UK

Chris Morris, you have a choice of "By" or "On". What do you think?
Stephen Buxton, Coventry, UK

How do I calibrate my flux capacitor?
Brian Saxby, Gateshead

Not the 9 o'clock news??
Kerrie, Leicester

How do I cook the perfect minute steak?
Nick Nevin, London, UK

In an ideal world, lawyers would charge for actual work done and .......
Phil, Bristol

A quarter to Tuesday?
Mark Crosby, Manchester

Ideal way to pay the plumber?
A, UK

Not cometh the man?
Mark Crosby, Manchester

How do you time a soft-boiled egg?
O.G.Nash, Doha, Qatar

To avoid embarrassment, how should you book your hotel room?
Nik, Cambridge

Macrame against the clock?
O.G.Nash, Doha, Qatar

Aging wicket-keeper for hire?
Nik, Cambridge

Roughly how quickly do the LBQ entries update ? ;-D
Phil, Nimes

I'm Federal agent Jack Bauer. This is the longest day of my life. Unforunately I'm paid..... ?
Jason S, Southampton, UK

How often do we need an update on the state of the Beckhams' marriage?
Catherine O, Maidenhead

Small village in Suffolk?
Sarah, Oxford

The unit of acceleration for ships?
Si Griffin, London

When will I be famous?
Lena Hughes, Stockport

23-7 ?
Jason S, Southampton, UK

What does the following code do?
x = Timer
DO
     IF Timer-x > 3600 THEN
        PRINT "NOT"
      x = Timer
    END IF
LOOP

James Bosson, Farnham

All wrong. The correct question was how will the UK's new Japanese-style capsule hotels accept bookings?