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Last Updated: Thursday, 8 April, 2004, 14:25 GMT 15:25 UK
The Lunchtime Bonus Question
Welcome to the Lunchtime Bonus Question.

The rules are simple. Every day at 1030 BST we give you an answer. You then tell us what the question was.

Marks are deducted for predictability, and a selection of your most wrong questions are published each day until about 1500 BST when the actual question is revealed.

The winner of this week's Lunchtime Achievement Award and keyring is Annie McGuinness of Lanarkshire for her utterly wrong question on Monday. "Great thanks," she said on receiving the award. "Can I trade it on eBay?" And no, no one ever taught her it was rude to point.

The LBQ will return on Tuesday 13 April. Happy Easter to all.

THURSDAY

Thursday's answer is "HE'S GOING TO WALK IT"

Entries are now closed. Wrong questions included:

Forrest Gump II starring Johnny Vegas?
Kip, Norwich

"So Michael", said the talking car, "what is the nasty generic south American villian going to do now that we've put a spanner in the works of his quasi-evil plans?"
Kay, Northampton

In the Paras, what is "Doing a Port Stanley"?
Simon, Yarm

Diary of a long distance rambler?
Alex, Manchester

I see Ranulph Twistleton Wickham Fiennes is off on a relaxing round the world trip?
John Dodds, Gifford, East Lothian

Superman: The Retirement Years?
Duncan Parish, London

Is Dr Howard Stoate going to win the MP Pedometer competition, then?
Susan, London, UK

What is the least likely answer to the question; 'How is John going to get between his two jags?'
Susan, London, UK

Michael Jackson. Moon. Discuss.
Leanie Kaleido, Tonbridge, UK

How's the aged Roger Bannister going to travel a mile now?
John Henry, London

What will the RAF Chinook pilot do when it rains?
Graham S, London

Describe Inzaman Ul-Haq's style of running between the wickets.
Darren Farr, Billericay

Legs too long... bottoms too big?
Tim, Leuven, Belgium

How's Alan of the East going to become Alan of the West?
Sam Williams, Nottingham, UK

With building still behind schedule, how will the Athens Olympic 200m freestyle champion win?
Kieran Boyle, Oxford

Will Si Griffin win the LBQ annual award for most published LBQer?
Chris Ford, Bristol, UK

What phrase can never refer to "Two Jags" Prescott?
Chris Ford, Bristol, UK

How is Al Jolson going to cover the million miles for one of those smiles ?
Barry, Bromley

What's my wife's reaction when I'm asking to be picked up from the pub at 2.00am.
Ian H, Manchester

After reading Chris from the Brecon Beacon's entry on Tuesday, why is there not much point entering the LBQ this week?
Tim G, London, UK

How do you get to the end of 30 miles of shelves
Ian H, Manchester

"Arr Cap'n, what's the prisoner doing with that plank?"
Edward Green, London

Round the world in 80 years?
Kevin, Eastleigh

Rob Liddle admits defeat
Katy B, Surrey

Rik Waller on the 100 metre race?
Rachael, UK

"I thought he was going to swim across the river, but that Jesus fellow is such a show off"
Kevin Miller, Warrington, Cheshire

All wrong. The correct question was what was Rupert Murdoch's verdict on how George W Bush will perform in the presidential election.


WEDNESDAY

Wednesday's answer is "ALAN OF THE EAST"

Entries are now closed. Wrong questions included:

So number 2, what's yer name and where d'yer come from?
Alan, Theest

If North By North West is acclaimed for its direction, which Hitchcock film seemed to lose its way completely?
Mike Yeaman, Newcastle upon Tyne

Whickers World goes to Middle Earth?
Fiona, West Lothian, Scotland

Occidental tourist?
Mike Grimes, Liphook, UK

With so few of us left in the country, the remaining men will all be given new titles. I shall now be refered to as...
Alan, Norwich

Orient-al?
John Thompson, Southport, UK

What's better than a Dial Up of the West
Andy Cottier, London

To what has Gadaffi changed his name to ensure that no-one gets it wrong in future?
Chris Ford, Bristol, UK

In the story of the Nativity the three wise men were called Melchior, Balthazar and....?
Franki Campbell, Cupar

It's the fish that John West reject, that gets used by...
Phil, Nimes

Name Nanook of the North's less famous brother.
Mark Gledhill, Northampton

"Go West young man" - but what was his name?
Mark Starling, London

"Eh-up, so you're from Hull, happen, ee-by-gum. What's your name lad"?
Peter Jones, Hull, UK ('appen, ee-by-gum)

Lawrence of Arabia 2?
Al Kirby, Southend On Sea

Who designed the Wicked Witch of the West's ruby slippers?
Ibbi, Portsmouth

All wrong. The correct question was what is the name of the statue of Alan Partridge which is proposed for Norwich, a reponse to the Angel of the North.


TUESDAY

Tuesday's answer is "TEARING THEIR FAKE HAIR OUT"

Entries have now closed. Wrong answers included:

The Teletubbies' reaction to the issue of under-twos watching TV?
Kiltie, Staffs

Barristers taking industrial action?
Candace, New Jersey, US

Two Gonks get into a fight and end up doing what?
John Mead, London

Brazilian wax on your mirkin madam?
John Mead, London

What obsesses greyhounds?
Smudge, MK

What do you call ripping a picture of an impoverished Indian holy man out of a magazine?
Chris Jones, Preston

Reformed rug addicts?
Chris, Brecon Beacons

What happens when two models at Tussauds appear in the same dress?
Maria, Aldershot

Asset stripping in a wig factory?
Kip, Norwich

What have the "once a year hippies" been doing while trying to get a ticket to Glastonbury?
Bob, Chester

Grief reaction when footballers' wives discover that their husbands are cheating on them?
Melissa, London

Equus: the My Little Pony years
Kieran Boyle, Oxford

Trouble in the Salon?
Mike, Aberdeen

How to spot the plain clothes cops at a Motorhead concert?
Phil, Nimes

When Furbies go bad?
Chris Whittle, London

What happened when Jordan and Posh Spice bumped into each other at a London night club?
Jane Cusworth, Leeds

Wrecking instruments on stage is passé - what's the Rolling Stones' latest gimmick?
Peter Jones, Hull, UK

Extension Armageddon?
Chris Whittle, London

Good morning and welcome to the Barbie Doll Chainsaw Decimation Society's fifth annual event, we will start proceedings by...
Mark Gledhill, Northampton

All wrong. The correct question was how might stag and hen parties react to Blackpool's move upmarket with a new code which encourages shops to stop selling rude T-shirts and plastic boobs.


MONDAY

Monday's answer is "30 MILES OF SHELVES"

Entries are now closed. Wrong questions included:

What do you give the man who has everything?
AM, Lanarkshire

What would you need to store the printed version of Google?
Rich C, London

"Glasgow's miles better" worked well, any suggestions for B&Q ?
Stephen H, Nottingham, UK

Apart from "a life", what else does a Terry Pratchett completist need?
Brian Ritchie, Oxford, UK

The storage used for The Never-Ending Story
Sarah, Essex

5 billion green bottles sitting on... what?
Peter Olding, Bournemouth, UK

My husband's attempts at building an MFI flat-pack CD unit resulted in?
Anne R, Fareham

The M4 corridor could be brightened up with what?
Hadleigh, Reigate, Surrey, UK

Paranoid people think the FBI have a file on them. REALLY paranoid people think the FBI have ...
Mike, Aberdeen

When do you realise you have 'Compulsive Shelving Disorder'?
Adya, UK

What was required to make the "Guns, lots of guns" scene in the first Matrix film?
Tony Sibley, Bracknell, UK

New drive-thru supermarket?
Steve, Brighton

What is the shelf life of 50 kiolmetres?
Trish Cusack, Sydney

An example of a wardrobe malfuction?
David, UK

Eminem meets Waterstones?
Melissa, London

In a sure sign that the budget of Changing Rooms is decreasing, what did Linda Barker want Handy Andy to make out of a 2 meter piece of MDF?
Adam Dawkins, Leicester, UK

Now that DVDs are here to stay, on average, what's being thrown away from Blockbusters?
Mark Starling, London

.....But they NEVER have what you WANT!
Mike, UK

Extreme IKEA ?
Vicky, East London

300 miles of shelves are decimated with a chainsaw. What remains?
Nik, Cambridge, UK

Following the succesful sale of Channel Tunnel digging machine on E-bay, Tesco are now trying to sell off items from store refurbishment. You can now bid (reserve price 99p) for... (AND you get Clubcard Points!!)
Mike Annan, UK

What would you find in the library on the Tardis?
David Gorton, Oldbury, UK

I had a weekend off buying CDs but what did I have to buy?
Stuart C, Cardiff

If all the rejected entries for the LBQ were printed off, how much space would be needed to store them?
Caroline, Berks

The Dusting Marathon ?
Jason S, Southampton, UK

How much storage is taken up by the back cataloge of Jay Leno's jokes?
Kirsten, Bristol

What is required to store 30 miles of spinsters?
Robin, Herts

What did Peter Jackson demand for the final battle scene in "Lord of the Rings: Return of the King"? ... no, wait
Paul B, Tunbridge Wells

All wrong. The correct question is how much space do the books in the Vatican library take up (not including some that have gone missing).




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