The Lunchtime Bonus Question

Bookmark the LBQ at www.bbc.co.uk/magazine

Welcome to the Lunchtime Bonus Question.

The rules are simple. Every day at 1030 GMT we give you an answer. You then tell us what the question was.

Marks are deducted for predictability, and a selection of your most wrong questions are published each day until about 1500 GMT when the actual question is revealed.

FRIDAY

Friday's answer is "AN OVERSIZED WOK"

Entries are now closed. Wrong answers included:

So Tim G has six LBQ answers in one week... let's see what he's won!
Bruce Forsyth, UK

My name's not Si Gwiffin, so when LBQ used my wesponse, I was so surpwised I beat myself wepeatedly with...
Victoria Woddam, Bicester

What is an astewoid
Phil Aplin, Cheltenham

What can you gift-wrap to make your family believe that you've bought a Sky Plus subscription for them this Christmas ?
Simon Walke, Basingstoke, UK

Despite being too large, which cooking utensil always ends up as OK?
Dan Swanmore, Bury St Edmunds, UK

In what would you cook David Campese's humble pie?
Chris Ford, Bristol, UK

What would you do to exercise your oversized dog ? Take it for....,no wait.
Linz Gordon, Edinburgh

when I mis-read the recipe for "thousand-year-old eggs" as "a thousand, year-old, eggs", I thought I'd need....
Pete, UK

What should Meat Loaf be cooked in?
Helene Parry, Twickenham

Electrocute Saddam? I say do a Vic Reeves and hit him with "______"
Steve, Brighton

Basic ingredients for a UFO spoof ?
Simon Walke, Roswell, England

No small fry?
Phil Cheesman, Southampton

Cracker Joke Writers Exam: 22. What does one thwow at a vewy large wabbit?
Jacquie, Cambridge

In the Chinese version of Eastenders, with what did Pauline Fowler hit Arthur?
Gwilym Thompson, Leeds

What does Ken Hom use when he has bigger fish to fry?
Phil Cheesman, Southampton

Suggest one way we could Feed the World.
Dave Godfrey, Swindon

Destined for the Oriental market, what is Ron Jeremy's new feature movie to be called??
Darcy Smith, Rhondda

What's the opposite of an undersized Cow?
Jenny, Scotton, N. Yorks

What did Jonathan Ross present Jane Goldman with when they became engaged?
Helene Parry, Twickenham

In Return of the Jedi, Chewbacca was basically just... no, wait.
Tim G, London

What will cost the most postage under the Royal Mail's new size not weight scheme?
Dougie Lawson, Basingstoke, UK

What would you use to make a prefabricated igloo?
Simon, Birmingham, UK

I'm making an oversized egg-fried rice, what do I need?
Dougie Lawson, Basingstoke, UK

What did Quasimodo use as an ironing board?
Simon, Birmingham, UK

What will I need to cook my sweet and sour elephant?
Pat M, Wallasey

All wrong. The correct question was what has the probe from Beagle 2 been said to resemble?

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THURSDAY

Thursday's answer is "IT'S ALL ABOUT PARKY"

Entries are now closed. Wrong questions included:

Where corgies might go for walkies?
Candace, New Jersey, US

An upcoming young star called Marky
Came out of the Beeb feeling narky
When asked "What did you do
In your interview?"
He said "Nothing, ________."
Pat M, Wallasey

To what did Alan Partidge attribute his phenomenal success?
John Whapshott, Guildford

If there were 26 concentric parks called Park A to Park Z, with Park A as the smallest in the middle, where is Park Z?
Ed, Clacton

If Meg Ryan had to attend anger management courses, what might be her reason for going?
Lisa, Edinburgh

What's the weather got in store for us, Michael?
Alec Cawley, UK

Describe Emu's anatomical position in this famous chatshow excerpt.
Trevor, Bloomsbury

Why did Pinky get upset after reading their biography? No, wait....
Joy, Birmingham

Gorky?
Kip, Norwich, UK

Chauvinist driving instructor's manual, Ch. 4,IIb: "Now young lady, you'll like this lessony-wessony very very much; _______."
Tim G, London

What comment gave away the latest novice Changing Rooms designer's lack of experience with flooring?
Phil Cheesman, Southampton

How did the Barnsley & District Journal sum up the film Love Actually?
Helene Parry, Twickenham

How's that book on hypothermia?
Kieran Boyle, Oxford

Cilla's comeback single is called 'What's ________?'
John Whapshott, Guildford

What's the title of the new Ross Kemp series about the tough maverick park keeper with a past.
Dave Williams, Prudhoe, UK

All wrong. The correct question was how have music insiders described the relative importance of Parkinson and Top of the Pops in launching new artists?

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WEDNESDAY

Wednesday's answer is "OPERATION FORREST GUMP"

Entries are now closed. Wrong questions included:

In an attempt to appeal to a larger cross-section of viewers, what will be the name of the next Bond movie?
John, Manchester<

How do the Secret Service refer to President Bush's early morning runs?
Richard Pennington, KY, US

Peter Jackson's decision to end Return of the King with a scene involving Tom 'Mr America' Hanks to boost his Oscar prospects has been codenamed what?
Tom W, Bristol

Nottingham police are cracking down on outdoor orgies. Their campaign called ... no wait.
David Dee, Maputo Mozambique

The US operation to capture Saddam Hussein was called Operation Red Dawn, but what was the Iraqi plot to capture President Bush called?
Niall Litchfield, Bristol

What is the codename for getting Saddam to talk by sitting him on a bench by a bus stop?
Dave Godfrey, Swindon

Buying a box of chocolates at 4.59pm on Christmas Eve on Oxford Street calls for what?
Matt, Windsor, UK

Which edition of a well-known surgical board game has the players pulling out chocolates instead of bones?
Joy, Birmingham

The ability to remove a Ferrero Rocher from the top of the conical pile and it magically reappearing in the next shot is known as what?
Mark Shipley, Leyland, Lancashire, UK

What is the trendy name for throwing old mattresses into woods... no wait.
Richard C, Camberley, UK

The war on terror keeps on running, and running, and running... That's why its being renamed __________
Ibbi, Portsmouth

What is a discreet way of letting colleagues know (while incorporating a bit of rhyming slang) that you are going to the toilet and may be some time?
Victoria, Westminster, UK

Your mission: track down the last decent box of chocolates before the shops shut for Christmas.
Sam Holloway, Cambridge

What's the codename for the Government campaign to reduce junk-food consumption at bus stops?
John S, Oldbury, UK

The Queen went into hospital for a knee operation and emerged with stitches above her eye. Who performed the ____, ________?
Dr Reece Walker, London

What is the codename for the Milk Tray Man's never-ending mission to deliver a box of chocolates?
Tim G, London

Typical Christmas: _________, _______ ____ and the Queen's Speech
Nigel, Winchester, UK

What's the working title for the proposed Hollywood remake of Carry On, Matron?
Helene Parry, Twickenham

All wrong. The correct question was the operation to capture Saddam was codenamed Operation Red Dawn, after the film by John Milius. What alternative name does Milius say would have garnered more publicity?

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TUESDAY

Tuesday's answer is "A LOT OF LEADS"

Entries are now closed. Wrong questions included:

Along with 12 stables and a ton of reindeer food, what else is essential to be a Santa?
S Murray, Chester, UK

The play 12 Angry Men is notable for having what?
Tim G, London

What would the police have if someone tried to assassinate Simon Cowell?
Leonard, London, England

What's on sale at Elland Road? Oh wait....
Mike, UK

Fraternal greetings. I am glad to see that the Magazine reporting extends to the Novgorod mayoral election.
A Lotof, Novgorod, Russian Federation

There was a young fellow called Deeds
A dog-walker for all sorts of breeds
When asked how he'll
Keep them walking at heel
His answer was _______
Pat, UK

What does Medusa need to keep her hair under control?
Nelson, Oxford

How did the police finally catch Cruella De Vil?
Kirsty Warner, Wilstead, UK

On my tour of northern England I saw... no, wait.
Tim G, London

Why was the alchemists' Gold 2003 convention cancelled?
Shaky, Manchester

Rejected slogan for Viagra: "It puts a _________ in your pencil"
Dave Williams, Prudhoe, UK

What do you need to hide Kryptonite from Superman?
Richard Sockett, Sheffield, England

What does BlueTooth do away with ?
Simon Walke, Basingstoke, UK

What was accidentally packed into a Cluedo box, instead of the revolver, candlestick, rope, etc?
Phil Hatchard, Exeter

And now for auction from the Dept of Imperial Weights and Measures...
Ben, UK

Activists organise a complete breakout from the exercise yard at Battersea Dogs Home, police say they have _______.
Ibbi, Portsmouth

What am I calling my new combined stationery and pet supply shop?
Stephen Turner, Cambridge

What Fred gave Ginger?
Candace, New Jersey, US

Any clues in the missing pencils case?
Brian Ritchie, Oxford, UK

What does the back of my computer look like?
Will, Winchester

All wrong. The correct question was what did a US official say they had got out of Saddam's briefcase?

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MONDAY

Monday's answer is "BY SIZE AND NOT BY WEIGHT"

Entries are now closed. Wrong questions included:

If fax machines were to die and documents were sent by e-mail, how would lawyers charge you ?
Jason S, Southampton, UK

Si Griffin's questions are often successful because others' are judged... no, weight!
Dr Bex, London

Where would you find the word sizarship in the Oxford English Dictionary?
Neil Creamer, Birmingham

How do you stealth tax a souffle?
Adrian, Southend-on-Sea

Byzantine Byway By-Law 10.4.a)i)III : Bystanders buying bygone bicycle byproducts should bypass biped bills by bilaterally buying ....
John H., Germany

Performance of the rail system should be evaluated... by sighs and not by wait.
Gerry T, Faringdon, England

Never mind the quality feel the width. Translate into Rumsfeldese.
Chris Ford, Bristol, UK

What's the easiest way of changing the density of an elastic band?
Si Griffin, London, UK

How are Breakfast cereal cartons designed?
Graham Brown, Mostly Oxfordshire

What is the best measure of a woman?
Phill C, Sheffield, UK

How has The Independent improved ?
Kieran Boyle, Oxford

How do you tell the difference between a ton of feathers and a ton of lead?
Phil Welch, London

What phrase placed before 'rose' indicates that you will meet someone outside Mr Griffin's house and not the local supermarket?
Norman Dawes, Bury St Edmunds, UK

What's the only way to measure a hole in the ground?
Becky, London

Luckily for helium balloon sellers, their product is priced...
Tim G, London, UK

After having deluged the Lunchtime Bonus Question team with my efforts over the recent months and having been singularly unsuccessful in my bids for publication, I was forced to draw my conclusions as to the criteria required for a successful effort. Today, though, of all days, I am optimistic that the usual requirements will be reversed, and that I will succeed where, up till now, I have failed. What is the new criterion by which I hope the question will be judged?
Ian, Sweden

At the World Beard and Moustache Championships in Austria, Saddam's Uranium-in-beard ploy backfired, as its was judged ....
John H., Germany

Suggest one possible criterion for voting for Lord of the Rings as best book in the Big Read'.
Dave Godfrey, Swindon

How does Richard Desmond categorise his magazines?
Jeff, UK

By which Venetian bridge should we meet?
Dave Taylor, Leeds

It may be what you do with it that counts, but people still judge it...
Edward Green, London

What is the best measure of a man?
Sarah Henderson, Scotland

Without the "rattle test" what is the best way to guess the contents of Christmas presents?
Ibbi, Portsmouth

All wrong. The correct question how is the Post Office reportedly considering charging customers to post letters.