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Last Updated: Friday, 28 November, 2003, 15:54 GMT
The Lunchtime Bonus Question
Bookmark the LBQ - www.bbc.co.uk/magazine
Welcome to the Lunchtime Bonus Question.

The rules are simple. Every day at 1030 GMT we give you an answer. You then tell us what the question was.

Marks are deducted for predictability, and a selection of your most wrong questions are published each day until about 1500 GMT when the actual question is revealed.

FRIDAY

Friday's answer is "FRIENDSHIP HARVESTERS"

Entries are now closed. Wrong questions included:

What is Hannibal Lecter's new restaurant to be called?
Stephen, Wolverhampton

Fiendish rash perverts. Confused?
Mona Andrews, Stowmarket, UK

What can be used to bale out chums?
Norman Dawes, Bury St Edmunds, UK

What do you call a mortician team who collect pelvises from deceased colleagues?
Viv Harbert, Portsmouth

Whose training manual includes the words "Have you ever visited our smoochy long-term relationship salad cart before?"
Paul, St Margarets

Business power talk: Hostile Takeovers bad, _____________ good.
Luke A , York

In a bid to boost sales, what will Grim Reapers Farm Machinery Ltd be known as from January?
Matt Woodage, Windsor, UK

What should you avoid when love-making in the hay?
Simon, Birmingham, UK

Friends in need are ...
Ray G, London

Government spin doctor Exam Q2: Give a euphemism for your armed forces invading a foreign country.
Neil Webber, Bristol

The Nigerian 419 scam is an example of ...
Dougie Lawson, Basingstoke, UK

At election time what do all political hopefuls become?
Stewart Clark, Hereford

What do you call people who frequently ask for favours?
Si Griffin, London, UK

Where will the Quakers hold their Christmas do?
Dave Godfrey, Swindon

All wrong. The correct question was what do men behave like in relation to their pals (i.e. collecting as many as possible), compared to women who nurture more, according to a new study.


THURSDAY

Thursday's answer is "A WILD CREATURE NO BIGGER THAN A GROUSE"

Entries are now closed. Wrong answers included:

What is a sparrow times a squirrel ?
Jason S, Southampton

Although I am a complete arachnophobe, my wife reassures me that the one in the bath is only what?
John Whapshott, Guildford

What is the square root of an ostrich?
Sam, London

What type of animal was the subject of the magical "Journey of the Haggi" ?
Rockin Robin, Falkirk, Scotland

What does my orgasm implant look like?
Shiz Munro, Cheshire, UK

.. is worth two in the bush.
Joel, London

What is the official definition of a bonsai yeti?
Giles Murchiston, Cambridge

What do you see if you look at Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall through a pair of binoculars the wrong way round?
Jon, London

Cartoon Character Exam, Question 87: A cat will always be beaten by a mouse, a hunter will always be beaten by a rabbit, and a coyote will always be beaten by what?
Edward Green, Oxford

What is a grumble? P.S. Please send my medal to the above address.
Kieran Boyle, Oxford

In the Pigeon Classifieds : Would like to meet.....
Colin P, London

What's Roland Rat's Who's Who entry ?
Colin P, London

What is the next line to this poem:
Twas the night before Christmas,
And all through the house...
Phil Rogers, Bournemouth

What is an Elephant...no, wait.
Richard C, Camberley

Before "I can't believe we've met Mr Bean!", what was the alternative line that was turned down in this week's Simpson's to describe Tony Blair?
Lester Mak, London, UK

Who will be Audley Harrison's next opponent?
Peter Jordan, Exeter

In what category could I put a mouse and a louse, but not a house?
Lester Mak, London, UK

What do whisky drinkers claim to have seen attacking pink elephants recently?
Phil Evans, Newcastle, Staffs

What's a grouse?
Lester Mak, London, UK

What IS a griffin anyway?
Simon, Birmingham, UK

All wrong. The correct question was what was one response in a survey of Americans who were asked what haggis was.


WEDNESDAY

Wednesday's answer is "FLUFFED CHIPS OR STABBED PUTTS"

Entries are now closed. Wrong questions included:

Why did I never make it as professional snooker player?
Nick Nevin, London, UK

What were those flowerpot men really saying at the end of each episode?
Smudge, MK

Ahem, Mr Flip and Mr Stubbs! What makes you think you were victims of Mr Spooner?
Sara, Limassol

Little girls are "sugar, spice and all things nice", but what are little cutthroat executives made of?
Phil Cheesman, Southampton

What question works with all possible answers? "So the actress said to the bishop ______."
Russ, Leeds

What does Colin Montgomerie have for breakfast with his bacon and eggs?
Robin Johnston, Falkirk, Scotland

What phrase might emerge if you allowed a chimpanzee to point to five random words in a cookery book?
Norman Dawes, Bury St Edmunds, UK

If Jamie Oliver and Tiger Woods swapped jobs for the day, what would you get?
Richard Sockett, Sheffield, England

If Frank Zappa ever had another child, what did he plan to call it?
MTM, Huddersfield

What has Tiger never had that I am quite good at?
David Lawrence, Bern, Switzerland

What happened when the shotputter upset the javelin thrower's tea?
Lisa, Edinburgh

In a golf match between Fluffed and Stabbed, how where the two final shots played?
Andrew Smith, Liverpool

How would you describe most of the competition on Superstars?
Graham Triggs, London, UK

After eating McJunk food in your car, vain attempts to clean the spilt ketchup off the floor with a french fry on a fork simply result in what?
Sarah, UK

When you take a potato, peel it, slice it, fry it - oh and don't forget the par-frying, freezing and adding salt and dextrose sugar solution - then put the resulting fries into a cardboard container you end up with what?
Carrie B, Poole

When playing Buzzword Bingo during the Queen's speech, what are the least likely options?
Helen, UK

What are my memories of school dinners ?
Simon Walke, Basingstoke, UK

Two alternative names for "freedom fries" considered were _______?
Ibbi, Portsmouth

What are the two short listed titles for the next JK Rowling epic? Harry Potter and the _______
Chris Ford, Bristol, UK

All wrong. The answer was what was the reaction of golfers to the 1930s Grade II-listed house by 17th hole at Wentworth that's been bulldozed by its owner?


TUESDAY

Tuesday's answer is: "PRACTICALLY IMMORTAL"

Entries are now closed. Wrong questions included:

My witticisms are forgotten in seconds, but my howlers are...
James C, London

How would you describe the DIY spirit?
Paul Peru, Oslo, Norway

The presence of Arthur Griffin and Jennifer Griffin on the LBQ judging panel ensures Si's name is what?
Dr Worster, Crawley

If cleanliness is next to godliness, what does that make Mr. Sheen?
Helen, Paris

How would you describe Handy Andy from 'Undead Changing Rooms'
Dan, Bristol

I have just reread the terms of my endowment mortgage, and for it to be of any value I will have to be what?
Dr Reece Walker, London

The holes in my road will never be filled in because they are____________
John Whapshott, Guildford

What is the worst typo a journalist can do when writing "practically immoral"?
Adya, UK

The movie 'DIY Sex' was... no, wait.
Rob Holman, Chislehurst, Kent, England

Doctor Who is ...
Dougie Lawson, Basingstoke, UK

To be what is good but not good enough if one wishes to live forever?
Catherine O, Maidenhead, UK

Advertisers Exam: Offer a slogan for a cryogenesis company?
Graham Triggs, London, UK

Michael Howard doesn't like being called undead - the politically correct term is...
Stuart C, Cardiff, Wales

What do I want to be when I grow up?
Mike, Aberdeen

Whereas Christianity deals with the theoretically immortal, reincarnationsists deal with the what?
Ian Watson, Sandy, UK

What does it help to be if you want to become the world's oldest person?
Graham Campbell, Edinburgh

If the kids from Fame had got their wish to live forever, what would that make them now?
Ed, Clacton

In Britain, he's a wrinkly DJ. In Russia, Simon Bates is what?
Dave Godfrey, Swindon

It's not only the middle-aged who consider plastic surgery to be a good alternative to being what?
Carol Bond, Poole

If it weren't for the fact that I'm going to die one day, I'd be....
Dave Godfrey, Swindon

So Mr Bean, how do you feel after appearing in yesterday's LBQ?
Si Griffin, London, UK

What do the impractically dead wish they were?
Steve, Brighton

All wrong. The correct question was how have red sea urchins been described, after scientists realised they could easily live to be more than 200 years old.


MONDAY

Monday's answer is "I CAN'T BELIEVE WE MET MR BEAN!"

Entries are now closed. Wrong answers included:

And then we met: Mr There, Mr Donne-that, and Mr Bought the Tee-shirt.
Ben , UK

So, Mr Osbourne, what was it about your memory of dancing the tango with Satan while Mr Bean flew past on a pink pterodactyl that convinces you it was one of your drug-induced hallucinations?
Peter Jordan, Exeter

I waited eight years to join this Gentleman's Club on the basis of its reputable members, and what happens as soon as I walk through the door?
Graham Brown, Mostly Oxfordshire, England

What recent statement by Emma Bunton shows exactly how far the Spice Girls kudos has fallen in the last few years?
Mike Head, London

You can't believe we beaned Mr. Meat?
Soanky, US

What is Ryan Parry's most abiding memory of his time in the Palace?
Dave Godfrey, Swindon

What did Mr Sprout say to My Carrot in the Vegi remake of Resevoir Dogs?
Peter, Scotland

What is an easier way to wind up Rowan Williams?
Pauline , Herne Bay

So, I paid this "celebrity fix-it" guy two grand to be introduced to Minnie Driver, and guess what?
Chris Howe, Shefford, Beds

Do you realise you just met Mr Bean?
Nick Daniels, Luton

What did you think of the premiere of Love Actually?
Louise, Chelmsford

How do you know you're legumenconcursdiscredulant?
Paul Peru, Oslo, Norway

What did the M&Ms say to the Skittles?
Mahan, Belfast

As experiences go, my last minute drop goal in the World Cup Final was OK but for the rest of my life...
Garry Rucklidge, Oldmeldrum, Aberdeenshire

Newly released censored footage of the Apollo moon landings reveals disturbing hidden censorship.
Mark Starling, London

What is the easiest way to wind up Rowan Atkinson?
Joel, London

What was our reaction on stepping out of the magic Costume Shop... oh, wait.
Ellie, London

Due to a wax shortage, Madame Tussaud's has started modelling in butter substitutes. What is the new exhibition called?
Graham Triggs, London, UK

Mr. Stalk to Mr. Green:
Richard Pennington, Bardstown, KY, US

Given the death of Boromir in the Fellowship of the Ring, what will fans be saying at the Return of the King Premiere if the actor who played him turns up?
Tim G, UK

What's the low-calorie alternative to meeting Mr Bean?
Tim G, London

All wrong. The correct question was what was Homer's reaction on meeting Tony Blair in the new episode of The Simpsons called The Regina Monologues, first broadcast in the US last night.


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