Women despair at 'do it all' life

Celebrity images can make women anxious about their body

Fed up at work, fat and with an unfulfilled social life is the grim sum of how British women feel.

The "have it all" dream of the 1970s and 80s has turned to a "do it all" disaster, a survey by health and wellbeing magazine Top Sante found.

A life spent juggling too many roles means women feel frustration more often than any other emotion, it said.

On the only optimistic notes - 50% of the 2000 surveyed liked their hair and 73% were happy with their height.

The lifestyle survey's findings were a downturn on past results Top Sante editor Marina Gask said.

She said she believed women need "50" hours in the day to balance work, family, social and sex lives.

It's not good. There's a bit of a crisis Marina Gask Top Sante Magazine The strain of being a woman

"Women say I can have the husband, great career, house and children. The reality is for most that is not realistic.

"We all feel under pressure to do everything perfectly, but can't. It's not good. There's a bit of a crisis."

The survey found more than half of the women questioned would like to change career, feel finances are out-of-control and have credit card debt.

Six out of 10 say their work-life balance, or lack of it, is the greatest obstacle to happiness and 70% feel underpaid.

The cost of living in Britain, crime, health care, rain, unfriendly people and public transport were also sources of woe.

Two-thirds would quit the rat race, half are happy with their hair

At home the picture remained bleak with 86% of women who work full-time saying they do more chores.

Three quarters feel they are left holding the baby more often and most find they relax with food and wine.

Perhaps partly as a result, 90% said they were unhappy with their body and a quarter would consider cosmetic surgery.

The vast majority - 85% - said they thought about their shape daily and many who were normal weight still wanted to be slimmer.

HAVE YOUR SAY Haven't we come an awfully long way in the wrong direction? Skid, Cambridge Send us your comments

"The pressure on women is increasing stress and feelings of inadequacy," said Miss Gask.

"The endless procession of sleek, buffed, youthful, surgically enhanced body perfect celebrities leaves most women feeling imperfect.

"There's always been more pressure on women than men to look fantastic."

Heaven. A pint, chips, football, mates - what's not to love? Michael Hogan Zoo Magazine

Psychologist Rosanna Cousins questioned whether the health magazine survey results held out across society.

But, she said, people take on work without considering the cost.

They are driven by "status anxiety" because discussing money and revealing your true earnings is "more of a taboo than talking about sex".

The way to restore work-life balance was to define work hours and stick to them, she said.

The survey did not compare its findings with men's attitudes to life, work, stress and their figure.

Half of the women admitted spending more than they earn

Zoo magazine's Editor at Large Michael Hogan said men shared some anxieties but women were more competitive about stress levels and some overstated them.

"No-one thinks they get paid enough," he said.

"Blokes probably do dream of having different jobs, but because they're little boys it tends to be a footballer, pop star or DJ."

Like women, who took refuge in alcohol and comfort eating, he said men tackled stress with "drink, food, and televised sport, preferably all three at the same time, with mates".

"Heaven. A pint, chips, football, mates - what's not to love?"

He said women were historically under more media pressure to look good whereas most men "don't worry about it".

But confronted with an image of a buffed celebrity like Troy star Brad Pitt, most men would admit they weren't happy with their bodies, he said.