Rev Paul Collier addresses the synod
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The Church of England's governing body has heard a series of speeches in favour of a more liberal stance over homosexuality.
The general synod tackled the issue for the first time since the row over the ordination of a gay bishop in the US.
One speaker, Sister Rosemary, of the Community of the Holy Name in Nottingham, called the idea of forced celibacy for the clergy "abhorrent".
For some gay clergy celibacy was "just misery", she told the Synod in London.
"The idea of forced celibacy is as abhorrent as the idea of forced marriage," she said.
"But what our church no longer requires of heterosexual clergy it still insists on for those who are homosexual."
She said there were gay clergy who had managed to live with celibacy but for others "misery remains just misery".
"They are exposed to the danger of a kind of withering of the heart, which makes them less and less able to love anybody," she added.
She called on the Church of England to "repent" of the "cruel way" in which the church had treated gays.
Synod members voted to commend a House of Bishops guide entitled Some Issues in Human Sexuality.
The document does not change current church policy in which the church says heterosexual marriage is the proper context for sexual activity
but that gay people in long-term relationships should not be excluded from the church.
However is continues to say gay clergy should remain celibate.
Bishop Desmond Tutu was welcomed to the general synod
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The Rev Paul Collier, from Southwark diocese in London, told the synod he was a gay man who had been in a life-long committed relationship for five years.
He said he had been 10 years in ministry.
He told the synod that a policy of abstinence could only be "sterile and hopeless".
But the Rev David Banting of Harold Wood, Essex, said the bible ruled against homosexual practice.
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The assertiveness and the urgency of this particular lobby has led to widespread disturbance and schism in the Anglican church
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He told the synod that the gays' lobby had resulted in a split within the church.
"The assertiveness and the urgency of this particular lobby has led to widespread disturbance and schism in the Anglican church around the world," he said.
The speeches follow the consecration of Canon Gene Robinson, an openly gay man, as Bishop of New Hampshire in the US last November.
In Britain, gay but celibate cannon Dr Jeffrey John was nominated to become Bishop of Reading. He later withdrew his acceptance of the post following opposition.
The debate comes as a new Anglican commission decides how to proceed in the light of the row over Bishop Robinson. It is due to report early next year.