Alarming prospects

By Eva Voelker of the BBC German Service

Powerful external sounder, loud and piercing alarm, deafening 130-decibel siren. These are selling points for all sorts of acoustic alarms.

To me, it seems as though the British are obsessed with them; whether they are personal, car, smoke, fire or burglar alarms.

The first completely unexpected and terrifying encounter I had with these noisy gadgets was in the kitchen just after I had moved into my new flat in London.

I was sitting down for a nice quiet breakfast but as soon as the bread was toasted - it was not burnt but a nice golden colour - there was a deafening noise.

It was the smoke alarm, carefully installed right above the toaster.

This was the first in a series of experiences that have made me allergic to alarms. The worst thing about these nasty creatures is that many of them go off whenever they feel like it.

And being clever, for maximum effect, they often choose the moment for doing so very carefully.

Marcus Herbert from Hammersmith and Fulham Council in London deals with noise nuisance caused by alarms.

"Unfortunately, it's very often the case that fate intervenes and when people go away on holiday, that's the time the alarm decides it's going to malfunction and that's when we get involved", he says.

Alarm deactivation squad

Marcus then must organise a contractor who deactivates the alarm. This work however, especially when dealing with car alarms, can be risky.

"I can understand people coming back to their car and seeing us standing next to it and thinking we're breaking into their vehicle", says Marcus.

"We've had a few people saying, 'What the hell are you doing? You haven't got the right to touch my car', and that kind of thing."

But it seems as though many people in Britain are convinced that the positive aspects of alarm systems outweigh their downside, Tom Wood is one.

"When you come home from work and approach the house, you know if the burglar alarm hasn't gone off from the bell-box. You think 'I haven't been burgled today'," says Tom.

But others think there is no reason for his neighbours to be armed to their teeth with alarms.

Six hours of incessant noise

Local resident Robert Ashdown says he is a regular victim of false alarms, recently enduring six hours of incessant alarm noise from his neighbour's house.

"I felt very angry and bloody-minded. A bit of me just wanted to throw a brick through their window so there might be a reason for the alarm to go off," says Robert.

But the problem is not limited to false alarms. Karen Johnston is a victim of regular fire alarm tests at her West London office.

"The frustration! They go off every Thursday morning and evening. It's so frustrating because it's continual and as a result people go into work late and leave early on a Thursday," says Karen.

"They test and then they test it again. I know it's important that we have fire drills but is it really necessary to go for half an hour continually?"

But the British do not stop at fitting their offices, homes and cars with all sorts of alarms. They also like to carry them around.

Wrist watch protection

A wrist watch that acts as a personal alarm has been developed by Doctor Willy Johnson, a leading British inventor. What is special about it is that apart from the 'whooping' alarm, it also shoots a foul-smelling spray at assailants when activated.

I just hope and pray that this invention will be safe against false alarms or it will mean a hard time not only for my poor ears, but also highly sensitive nose.

These prospects are indeed alarming.