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Last Updated: Tuesday, 20 January, 2004, 17:20 GMT
Simpsons keep the laughs coming
The Simpsons
The Simpsons' 15th season is currently shown on Sky One in the UK
The Simpsons has won more plaudits with three nominations at this years Writer's Guild of America awards on Monday.

Critics of the series had complained the show was beginning to lose its way with weaker scripts but ratings in the US are up more than 12% on last year.

The show, as firm fans will testify, has been littered with classic moments since the first episode was aired in 1990. Here are just a few of them...

  • When Homer joins the naval reserve: When the Simpson dad become part of "America's 17th line of defense" he is posted to a nuclear sub. "Nuc-u-lar. It's pronounced nuc-u-lar," he corrects his commanding officer.

  • Homer watching the Three Stooges on his own: "Heh heh. Moe is their leader."

  • The family suddenly inherit 17 greyhound puppies: Homer sits watching TV with a bag of potato chips. Cue many seconds of slapstick as each time he raises one to his mouth a puppy leaps through the air to snatch it from his fingers. D'oh!

  • The April Fool's episode: Bart and Homer try to outdo each other with April Fool Jokes ("You talk better than you fool" taunts Homer) Bart's response? Sabotaging Homer's last beer... with explosive results.

  • When Mr Burns cuts off Springfield's electricity: He and assistant Smithers go through outlandish security - including retinal scans and bomb-proof doors, to get to the master control room. And what's inside? A broken fire escape and a dog licking a milk carton.

  • The X-Files pastiche: The whole episode is great, but especially agent Scully transfixed at Homer running bare-chested on an a treadmill: "It's like a lava lamp".

  • The Simpsons go to Japan: And Homer complains about their time in a Japanese prison cell: "Oh, I'm sick of doing Japanese stuff! In jail we had to be in this dumb kabuki play about the 47 Ronin, and I wanted to be Oshi, but they made me Ori!"

  • Homer in the real world: From Treehouse of Horror VI, Homer is sucked into a black hole that deposits him into the real world. The episode ends with a computer-generated Homer walking down the street.

  • Bart 'Indiana Jones' Simpsons: Bart steals Homer's money jar in a scene reminiscent of the start of Raiders of the Lost Ark, with Homer falling down the stairs standing in for the giant boulder.

  • Homer's advertising jingle: Homer enters the snowploughing business with the jingle "I'm Mr Plow/ that's my name/ that name again/ is Mr Plow!"

    Do you agree that these are some of the best moments from the Simpsons? What are your favourites scenes in the long-running show?

    This Have Your Say is now closed. Read a selection of views below.

    The bit where a new gigantic flash fryer is being installed. Owner - "it can fry a whole buffalo (or something) in 40 seconds". Homer (wailing voice) "Oh, I want it NOW!"
    Bob, Northampton

    Almost any line from Ralph: "Me fail English? That's unpossible!" or "I bent my wookie!" Also, any scene where Maggie is trading glares with the unibrow baby and any scene where Bart is making crank phonecalls to Moe's Bar, but particularly the time where Moe just snaps and shouts down the line "I'm going to come over to your house and kill you!" and Bart gives him his address in an effort to break up his babysitter's triste.
    Caroline, London, UK

    The episode where the Simpsons have to use the witness relocation program to get away from Sideshow Bob
    Paul, Scarborough
    Marge: Homer you don't have to join a freak show just because the opportunity arises. Homer: You know Marge, in some ways you and me are two VERY different people.
    Gary, Bangor, Wales

    I really like the gay references in the Simpsons, especially the episode with John Waters. John: It's camp! The tragically ludicrous? The ludicrously tragic? Homer: Oh, yeah. Like when a clown dies! The gay steel mill is classic too!

    I also liked Homer's line when a runaway tree destroys a branch of Kentucky Fried Panda Homer (crying) "Oh it was finger Ling Ling good!"
    Mark Milton, New York, NY, USA

    Homer spends an episode trying to get his boss to remember his name. Finally, he resorts to writing graffiti on the wall of Mr Burn's office stating 'I am Homer Simpson' only to be caught in the act: Mr Burns walks into the office, switches on the lights and says 'Who the devil are you?'
    Rob, London, UK

    The Koala at the start of the Australian episode. It gets electrocuted on a telegraph pole, falls down, then immediately starts climbing back up.

    The scientists sarcasm detector. The Cape Fear episode with the rakes. Homer's "Lets go'n buy some happiness". The time travelling toaster and the perfect future, complete with raining donuts. All brilliant.
    Mark, Manchester, UK

    The April fools episode again. Near the end where Dr. Hibbet says, "I'm sorry but your husband's dead," and after a brief pause says, "Only joking, April fools." Classic episode.
    Simon, London

    The episode where the Simpsons have to use the witness relocation program to get away from Sideshow Bob. The guys at the programme trying to explain to Homer that he is now Mr Thompson for hours on end. Great.
    Paul, Scarborough

    Blinky the fish killing off Mr Burns' political campaign. 'Dead before it hit the ground.'
    Peter, Lancaster
    Abe Simpson explaining to a young Homer how times have changed: "I used to be with it, but then they changed what 'it' was. Now, what I'm with isn't it, and what's 'it' seems weird and scary to me."
    Daniel Hayes, Bolton, Greater Manchester

    Homer in Space with Buzz Aldrin is superb. Homer breaks ant farm. Buzz " Homer noo.. now we will never know whether ants can be trained to sort tiny screws in space..!"
    Will, London

    One of my favourites is when Homer is telling off Bart for shoplifting with the classic line of 'Stealing! Did you not learn anything from that Police Academy movie I took you to. Did you hear anyone laughing. No!" Also the scene where Homer eats the mother of all chillis from Chief Wiggin and what follows is a classic piece of psychedelic cartoon imagery.
    Johnny J, Durham

    Funniest parts have to be where Bart strings a chain of megaphones together at the Police Station and it causes a massive sound wave that breaks all windows and leaves a ringing sound in the air for hours.

    Second part, Homer's advice to Bart: "These three little sentences will get you through life: Number 1: Oh good idea boss Number 2: Cover for me Number 3: It was like that when I got here.

    Pure class!
    Kieran, West Yorkshire, England

    Homer comes back from the wedding with the plastic people off the top of the cake, Marge tells them they can't be eaten but Homer eats them anyway and almost chokes. After they have cleared his gullet he says "Mmmmmmm ...... pointy!" Homer for President!
    Jimbo, UK

    Bart with the loudhailer 'Rod, Tod...This is god - leave milk and cookies at the Simpsons door'. Hysterical.
    Nick, London

    Anything that includes Mr Burns and Smithers...but the funniest one by far was in King Homer (Treehouse of Horror III) where they are discussing taking Marge with them to use as bait to catch the giant ape King Homer...Mr Burns:"Well what do you think about bringing her on the boat to use as bait?" Smithers:"You know my feelings about mixing women and seamen".....pure un-adulterated class!!
    Kev, Long Eaton, Nottingham

    Blinky the fish killing off Mr Burns' political campaign. 'Dead before it hit the ground.'
    Peter, Lancaster

    When Homer returns home from work, and slumps into a chair. Then he leans back so that the chair is balanced on the two back legs. Homer puts his feet on the table, closes his eyes to savour the moment, and murmurs ecstatically, 'mmmmm.... Slaaanty!
    Jane, Horsham, West Sussex

    The recent London trip by the Simpsons is a classic. The tabloid/broadsheet gag, the Blackadder homage, the stereotyped Brits. But the line used by Homer after they've met the Prime Minister - "I can't believe we just met Mr Bean!" -absolutely spot on.

    Is there any limit to the ingenuity of the show's scriptwriters? Long live The Simpsons, that's what I say!
    Chris Bociek, London

    Eh, why didn't you get something useful, like storm windows, or a nice pipe organ? I'm thirsty! Ew, what smells like mustard? There're sure a lot of ugly people in your neighborhood. Oh! Look at that one. Ow, my glaucoma just got worse. The president isn┐t Democrat! Hello? I can't unbuckle my seat belt. Hello? [honks car horn] There are too many leaves in your walkway...
    Furious George, Sheffield

    Bart with the loudhailer 'Rod, Tod...This is god - leave milk and cookies at the simpsons door'. Hysterical.
    Nick, London

    The epsiode when Homer and Bart are watching cartoons. Homer helpfully explains to Bart that cartoons aren't realistic - just as another Homer walks past the window, whistling happily to himself. Or lady: "Be careful not to scrape my asphalt". Homer (under his breath): "Kiss my asphalt".
    Joe, Essex

    When Homer starts an Internet business and calls himself "Chief Executive" then (because he thinks it sounds more important) - "No, wait, JUNIOR Chief Executive"!
    Chris, UK

    Any episode where Homer puts his specs on, reminds me of my dad!
    Jo, Derby UK

    The aliens Kang and Kodos as dopplegangers for Clinton and Dole. "You have to vote for one of us, it's a two party system. HAHAHAHAHA!"
    Paul, Rochester

    "Mmmmmmm Forbidden Doughnut"!
    Nick Clark, Bognor Regis , UK

    To my mind, perhaps the greatest Simpsons moment was the HMS Pinafore routine in Cape Feare. As a renowned Simpsons authority, it is my opinion that the Simpsons has been going downhill ever since Secrets of a Successul Marriage and the end of series 5. The series improved through the first three seasons and then peaked in series 4 and 5 with two seasons of unparalled genius. Ever since then it's been a rarely interrupted downward trajectory. I have hardly seen what I would consider a decent Simpsons for a couple of years.
    Raphael, London, England

    Any episode with Troy McClure!! "I can't remember the last time I heard a funnier anecdote....ok, now you tell one."

    "I remember you from such film strips as "Locker Room Towel Fight:The Blinding of Larry Driscoll."

    "It's a good day for me too, baby!" All quotes from when Troy marries Selma.
    Jim, Halifax, Canada

    The one where Homer bears an uncanny resemblance to Japanese cleaning product Mr Sparkle. He puts his glasses on, phones Japan and speaks to a marketing manager at Mr Sparkle HQ who opens with the inspired line of: "Moshi Moshi, Hello chief let's talk, why not." A promotional video of Mr Sparkle is then sent to Homer which shows Mr Sparkle's ability to "banish dirt to the land of wind and ghosts".
    David Grocott, Colchester, UK

    Lisa is struggling to learn ballet and her frustration shows in a frown on her face. Lisa's dance teacher tells her "Lisa turn that frown upside down!" Making Lisa beam a wonderful smile "That's not an upside down frown..." Her dance teacher bites "...that's a smile!"
    James Henaghan, Newcastle upon Tyne

    Homer: I was thinking something along the lines of "No beer and no TV make Homer something something" Marge: "go crazy"? Homer: Don't mind if I do! (goes totally gaga).
    Big Sy, Reading, England

    The one where Moe is tied to a lie detector test and they are asking him what he is up to later that evening. He starts out with outlandish answers until he is final forced to reveal the truth. So funny.
    Chris Bond, Swindon

    Best moment has to be the intro where Homer sings to the Flintstones theme tune. "Simpson, Homer Simpson he's a guy just like you and me" "From the town of Springfield, he's about to hit a chestnut tree......aaaahhhh"
    Allan Beckett, Glasgow UK

    Herman Munz's laugh.(Haw-haw!)
    Andrew, London, UK

    When Bart and Millhouse are in the elephant's mouth then Homer stands up and yells I will help you, then the next clip shows Homer like Bart and Millhouse dangling from the elephant's mouth, pure genius.
    Colin, Crewe England

    Warning on the TV, after an episode of Itchy & Scratchy... "The preceeding scenes contained violence and should not have been viewed by young children". Genius.
    Ed, Southampton, UK

    The X-Files episode. Homer is hooked up to a lie detector. Mulder explains what it does and sayd to Homer "Do you understand", Homer says "Yes" and the machine blows up!
    SL, London

    Each episode has a touch of genius though I think my personal favourite is the one where Homer work's at the Bowlarama. In a desperate attempt to impress his bosses he sets about trying to get more people through the door. Cue funny music sequence with Homer sitting at his table with his hilarious reading glasses reading first a book entitled "advanced marketing"- Homer has a thoughtfull look. The sequence then cuts to the same scene with Homer reading a book entitled "marketing for beginners", same sequence again with Homer now reading the book called "dictionary", and looks up the word "marketing!". He then looks like he finally gets it and has come up with a great idea to market bowlarama. It turns out his great idea is to stand outside bowlarama with a shotgun firing it into the air shouting "bowling, bowling, come get your bowling!!!" Needless to say it didnt work! Genius.
    Mike D, Birmingham

    Homer on the phone - "Hello is that the Operator ? Can you give me the number for 911" I laughed my head off !
    Danny, Uk

    The scene where Homer and Krusty have to perform a routine for the mob, including playing a line from the Godfather theme on glasses and doing a loop-the-loop in a teeny clown car - I defy anyone to watch that and not roar with laughter.
    , UK

    When the Homer gets fat and is trying to make a phone call: 'If your fingers are too fat to dial please mash the keypad in fury and an operator will come to your assistance."
    Tom, Japan

    omer attempting to use a PC [reading screen] "To Start Press Any Key". "Where's the ANY key? I see Esk ["ESC"], Catarl ["CTRL"], and Pig-Up ["PGUP"]. There doesn't seem to be any ANY key. Woo! All this computer hacking is making me thirsty. I think I'll order a TAB.[presses TAB key]". Classic!
    Baker, Bury, England

    Homer's brain: Use reverse psychology. Homer: Oh, that sounds too complicated. Homer's brain: Okay, don't use reverse psychology. Homer: Okay, I will!
    Guv Sandhu, Hounslow, UK

    The episode when Sideshow Bob becomes a model citizen working with his brother, Cecil (played by David Hyde Pierce - Niles Crane from Frasier), to build a dam. Things go awry & Bart jumps on Cecil's back covering his eyes & says "Guess who??". Cecil replies "Maris". Classic line which crosses sitcom barriers.
    Joel, London, UK

    Its got to be Homer's Beer Song: Doh - the stuff that buys me beer Ray - the guy who sells me beer Me - the guy who drinks the beer Far - a long way to get beer So - I'll have another beer La - I'll have another beer Tea - no thanks I'm drinking beer That will bring us back to [looks down into empty beer glass and slaps forehead] D'OH!!
    Abraham Tharakan, New Delhi, India

    Lisa: No I can't! I can't eat any of them! Homer: Wait a minute wait a minute wait a minute. Lisa honey, are you saying you're never going to eat any animal again? What about bacon? Lisa: No. Homer: Ham? Lisa: No. Homer: Pork chops? Lisa: Dad! Those all come from the same animal! Homer: [Chuckles] Yeah, right Lisa. A wonderful, magical animal.
    Ross, London

    The episode where Bart, Lisa and Maggie have a new Nanny called Sherry Bobbins. Makes fun of every bit of that classic Disney Film. The bit where they "tidy up the nursery" but just shove everything in cupboards or under the rug was excellent.
    Lu Lu, London

    Two favourite episodes are when Homer and Mister Burns come to Loch Ness to look for Nessie, when they drain the Loch and the wooden Nessie is there with "Stomp Aberdeen" on it and Homer shouts "No way Aberdeen rules", classic proof Homer is an Anerdeen FC fan.

    And the other episode (which has not been aired since sep 11 2001) where family Simpson go to get back Homer's car after Barney has been on a bender, Homer eating the Kalkalash and then topping it off with crab juice he then runs to the top of Tower 1 and the loo is out of order and he has to make to the top of tower 2 topped off by Homer trying to drive his car with the clamp on - classic, wish they would show that one again!!!
    Mike Allan, Aberdeen, Scotland

    The best line has to be when Kodas and Kang come down and declare Maggie to be there maybe and Homer cries out "you intergalactic space hussey" and in the middle of crying, stops and says "was he better than me?" and then carries on crying...absolutely hilarious!!
    Toby Hudson, Crawley

    Captain McAllister's late-night cable advert: "Yaarr, 90 Sea Chantees on 3 compact disks. Including: Blow the man down! Row, row, row your boat! In the Navy! Act now and get a bonus CD: Hornpipe Fever. Arr!" It's a throwaway but their best jokes usually are.
    Faisal Khan, United Kingdom

    Auto is shopping in the mall. He walks out of the "Pot Shop" and mumbles, "that should be against the trade descriptions act". Genius!
    Charlie, London

    The 'Monorail Song' is genius. Altogether now, "Monorail... Monorail...! MONORAAIIL!"
    Steve, Bristol, UK

    Marge "We don't want to smother the children". Homer "Yeh cause then we'd get the chair". Marge "Thats not what I meant homer." Homer "It is Marge, admit it".

    Homer "Fine Marge, i'll never do another stupid thing". Turns round straight into car door with hilarious consequences.
    Sam Cottis, Leeds, England

    Homer gains a graduate degree and sings... "I am so smart, I am so smart, S-M-R-T, i mean S-M-A-R-T" whilst setting fire to his lounge.
    Tom Whittaker, London, UK

    The episode where Homer has to teach Bart the facts of life, he starts off describing women as like fridges, then moves on to a beer anology "a woman is a lot like a beer, you'd step over your own mother to get one, but one's not enough you gotta have more" scene ends with a bemused Bart watching a wasted Homer babble incoherently.
    Terry, Essex

    For Montgomery Burns fans everywhere.... Mr. Burns: [to Homer] Young man, I'm making you my executive vice president. Smithers: Sir, I believe that position was informally promised to me. Mr. Burns: Oh, Smithers... I would have said anything to get your stem cells.
    Simon , Edinburgh, UK

    I love the episode where Bart and Lisa are having an argument (again) and Homer says to them "Shut up! I'm trying to think." Cut to his brain - "I want some peanuts." Genius.
    Matt, Hertford

    When Homer spins a globe and points at a South American country: "heh heh look at this country Marge: U R Gay".
    Ben Morgan, London, UK

    It has to be Burns' "See my vest, see my vest, made from real gorrilla chest....See my loafers, former gophers, it was that or skin my chauffeurs". mmmmm forbidden donut.
    Cat, Bristol, England

    When Bart joins the Mob, Marge: How much money do you make? Bart: 10 bucks a week Homer: Phssh, i make more than that! Classic!!!
    Mark, Venice, Italy

    Cape Feare: Sideshow Bob, et al in fantastic remake of the classic thriller. The scene where Bob keeps walking into the rakes is slap-stick at its best!
    Chris, Liverpool

    Homer: "Doh!" Lisa: "A deer" Marge: "A female deer" from the episode "Bart Gets An Elephant". Just cracks me up every time, Brilliant!
    Mark Milne, London, UK

    What about when the atomic bus runs away, Homer throws out an anchor which snags on a tombstone saying "Elvis...just accept". Almost any scene where Homer fulfils his role as 'safety officer' at the Nuclear plant.

    Marge is reading a magazine called 'Better Homes Than Yours'. Ned Flanders loses it and tells Bart "Here are some words you may find useful for your future - 'Hey Buddy! Can you spare a quarter!"' (not an exact quote).

    The school bus driver is receiving an award in front of the whole town - then he wakes up as the bus plunges into a ravine... Almost any comment Homer makes about parenting, or politics - especially when he tries to discipline Bart in any way...
    Nick G, London, England

    In my opinion the best 5 minutes of Simpsons is the Tree House short where Kang is Maggie's father. The fertilisation in the spacecraft is genius. Marge: Was that it? Kang: What are you trying to say?

    The confrontation at the house is hilarious, and as for the Jerry Springer bit, Jerry: How did it make you feel Homer? Homer: Angry jerry, angry and tired! Then the fight between Kang and Homer, with the show finishing with Marge saying: oh god, I'm so ing embarrassed!
    Bill, Sheffield, UK

    The very funny bit where Mr Burns is polishing his scalp to impress Marge, and when she appears he casually leans his head on his hand, which course slips off and lands on the desk with a thud!! Great sound effects for the slip too lol!!
    Chris M, Maidenhead, UK

    Favourite moment: When Homer purchased a gun from a store named "blood bath and beyond" - parodied from an actual chain of stores named "bed bath and beyond". Excellent.
    Richard Brown, Newport Beach, USA

    When Bart befriends Ralph and has a sleep over at Ralph's house. Officer Wigan puts on the night light as Ralph is scared of the dark. It is the brightest light ever!
    Yensie, London, UK

    In Homer Badman it cuts to a talk show hosted by Gentle Ben with a microphone attached to his head. Ben runs amok and makes his way to the buffet with screams of "No, Ben, No" and marksmen with jackets stating "Ben control" surround him. Hilarious.
    Jenny, Croydon, UK

    The episode when Homer gets barred from Moe's and has to find a new place to drink. He tries a number of bars, including one called the She-She Lounge which has loud dance music and is full of butch women. Homer, with a puzzled look on his face, says "There's something bothering me about this place. I know! This lesbian bar doesn't have a fire exit! Enjoy your deathtrap, ladies!". He then walks out, while one of the other patrons asks her girlfrield "What was HER problem?"
    Matthew Burchell, London, United Kingdom

    My favourite moment is the episode where Bart engineers a teacher's strike and a hyperactive Liza invents a perpetual motion machine. Homer says "Does this thing never stop ? That does it Marge we've got to end the strike, in this house we obey the laws of thermodynamics !"
    Andy Morgan, Edinburgh

    I know the Scorpio episode has been mentioned but to be more specific I nearly wet myself when Scorpio says "Have you ever seen a man say goodbye to a shoe?", and Homer simply replys "Yes, once".

    Plus I love the monorail episode when it's out of control and Homer is on board talking to Marge on the radio. Marge:I've got a man here who can help you. Homer:Batman Marge: He's a scientist Homer: Batman's a scientist? Marge: It's not Batman!!! Then the monorail is stopped by the anchor catching the large Donut sign and Homer says the classic: "Donuts, is there anything they can't do?" Sheer brilliance.
    Kim, Stafford, UK

    The episode where Bart wins an Elephant. Right at the end the Eelphant is released into an Elephant Sanctuary were it starts beating up all the other Eelephants by ramming into them.

    Marge - why is he doing that? Elephant Keeper - all sorts of reasons, he could be angry, upset or just plain stupid.

    At this point it is revealed Homer is busy headbutting the Keeper guy. Keeper guy: Stop it Mr Simpson, stop it. Pure classic.
    Jon, Birmingham

    Homer mocking the disappearing America on Mr Burns' boat as they head into international waters. "They will Never Know the simple pleasure of a monkey Knife fight". Classic.
    Alex, Manchester England

    It's the secondary characters that make the Simpsons so great. Troy McClure, the comic book guy, Wolfcastle ("on closer inspection, these are loafers"), Gil (who haunts me every time I have to deal with a hapless salesperson) and, of course, DuffMan.

    "You told me I wouldn't have to touch the drunk if I slept with you".

    Duffman says a lot of things, oh yeah."
    Sarah, Canada

    In the Regina Monologues episode, Homer is checking into the hotel insisting on the best service by telling the receptionist 'We saved your asses in 'Nam and shared our prostitutes with Hugh Grant!' Classic! '...they have the internet on computers now!'
    Steve, Gosport, UK

    Three quality moments: 1) In Homer Badman, Kent Brockman looking into the Simpson's house with a infra-red camera at a spit roast chicken. "We are looking at what we can only assume to be Mr Simpson rotating slowly in the oven, literaly stewing in his own juices."

    2)Mr Burns: "That looks like a nice Island Smithers, take us down." Smithers: "But Sir you have got the controls." Burns: "....Excellent!"

    3)In the episode where Homer grows his hair back: The completely random nature of Karl who turns up out of the blue to help him.
    Tom, Exeter

    At Apu's Wedding, Homer: "If I could just say a few words...I'd be a better public speaker..." (Bart collapses on the table in laughter). Brilliant.
    Will J, Reading, UK

    Homer is helping the community by painting a building a happy colour, sky blue... they just finish and a helicopter crashes into it.. Just one of many classic moments.
    Alan O'Riordan, Scotland

    The school is making cutbacks: the dinner lady says, "They've even got groundskeeper Willie teaching French". Cut to Willie in class, saying: "Bonjour, ye cheese-eating surrender monkeys!"
    Peter Martin, UK

    Homer singing .."you put the beer in the coconut and throw the can away" then throwing empty cans into Ned's garden; magical. Or when Apu is to be married; Apu:"Only the Gods can stop the wedding"; Homer (pondering).."Gods eh?"... Barney belchin. There's no end to the good bits.
    Paul Quanstrom, Eastbourne, England

    Homer goes to a chilli Cook-off and eats the world's hottest chillies and then experiences a Carlos Castaneda "meaning of life" type spiritual awakening in a mystical desert.Needless to say the "experience" leaves no long term effects on Homer!!
    Sylvia, Pensacola, Florida

    The best moment in a Simpsons episode is when an angry Springfield crowd blow up an English chipper at a St Patrick's day Parade. Hehe.
    Val, Dublin

    Neverending story - Lionel Hutz, "that's the most blatant case of fraudulant advertising since my suit against the neverending story." Ahh classic.

    "I'm L.T. Smash," said to Bart and Lisa. Can't quite remember. Bart goes...."oooohh, Lieutenant Smash." "That's right, Lieutenant L.T. Smash." Brilliant.

    Another brilliant episode is the one where Springfield is about to be hit by a comet. Homer's prediction is spot on, right down to the comet being no bigger than a chiwawas head when it hits. Just prior to Bart picking it rock up, lo and behold, a chiwawa is there and yes, it's head is about the same size.
    Ben Watts, Cambridge, England

    When Homer recounts his experience in new york city, being chased by mobsters pimps and chuds! ha ha ha.
    Charlie, Minneapolis, MN, US

    The best ever episode was the one when Marge was caught shop lifting in the Kwik-e-mart, she is under pressure and accidently takes a half bottle of some sort of alcohol. Court appearance and then to jail. As a consequence the town starts to fall apart, riots ensue and chief Wigham arrives on scene with a van load of vicious dogs and he says some thing along the lines of "I've been starving and tormenting these dogs for days by singing to them". He sings some thing along the lines of an off key 'Doh rah me la la'. He opens van doors and the dogs immediately savage him. A classic.
    Sue Gowans, London, England

    Snake the criminal. Every time he appears with his upper-class "All-right" it just cracks me up.
    Barry, UK

    Lisa (To Homer) - But who'll police the police? Homer - I dunno, the coastguard?
    Baz, Dublin

    Whenever I'm feeling down in the office, I remind myself about the time Apu gets fired from the Kwiki Mart and moves in with the Simpsons. One night to re-pay their hospitality he decides to cook a proper Indian Curry and warns the Simpsons it is spicy. When he then asks Lisa what she thinks of it she replies with dlllated pupils, "I can see through time". Mega funny........
    Matt Roberts, Berkshire UK

    The Treehouse of Horror segment when it's revealed that Kang is really Maggie's father is a classic. Marge relives the moment of conception, sitting on a sofa with Kang who shoots her with a ray gun. Marge: "That was quick" Kang: "What are you implying?"

    The family then go on the Jerry Springer show to try and thrash out Maggie's custody. Kang, the absent father, is roundly booed, and a woman stands up and shouts "If you're that baby's father, where you been at?" I fall over laughing every time I see this episode.
    Miranda, Milton Keynes, UK

    During a halloween episode willie speaks to bart Willie: "you got the shinning" Bart: "you mean the shining" Willie: "Shhhh you wanna get sued?" Willie then proceeds to die no less than 3 times in exactly the same way.

    When the teachers start eating the students Skinner corners bart in the gym and says. "I'm going to enjoy eating you bart, I think I will start as you so often suggested by eating your shorts".
    Neil Shaw, Doncaster, UK

    The Valentines Day Episode has to be one of the all time classics - Skinner's 'Nam flashbacks, Krusty's live show, Ralph Wiggum's crush on Lisa - I "choo, choo, choose" it as my favourite episode!

    Mr Burns sees the devil on one of the monitors at the power plant: "Who's that goat legged fellow? I like the cut of his jib" 2nd best character after Homer....
    Ryan, London

    Two Favourite Moments:- 1. Homer wearing a Baseball Cap and Tee Shirt emblazoned with the words "Witness Protection Programme"("Cape Feare").

    2. Moe asking Apu if the Kwik E Mart has any breakfast cereal for people with syphilis. Wonderful.
    Mark, Beds

    I love it even more whenever there is a burp and it doesn't matter who is doing it. It could be Maggie just after she's escaped a Flanders' style baptism, Barney Gumble - any time any where or the film critic - that was the burp to end all burps.
    Emma Furlong Hems, London, England

    The entire episode when Homer gets his jaw wired shut is classic, (oblique refrences to a donkey getting Homer in trouble throughout the episode) but one part stands out. When Marge enters a demolitioin derby and Homer saves the day in Popeye fashion. The beer gives him supernatural strength and courage-stupidity.
    Charlie, Minneapolis, USA

    Homer has a wonderful collection of facial expressions. The best face he has ever produced is when he is moulding the mashed potato in the clown college episode. The concentration he shows, it is priceless!
    Richard Morgan, Norwich, England

    The absolute classic musical number in the episode where Homer joins the Stonecutters. They sit in a huge refectory singing about their huge amounts of influence while waving tankards of beer about: "Who keeps the aliens under wraps, we do! "we dooooo" cut to alien quaffing beer at the table!

    "Boy, there is in each man a constant stuggle between good and evil that will never be won."

    "I am evil Homer, I am evil Homer."
    Phill C, Sheffield, UK

    When sideshow Bob is in court for trying to kill Bart and he has "Die Bart Die" tattooed on his chest. When asked what it means Bob replies it is German. The reply is, "no one who speaks German can be evil".
    Jon, Woking, UK

    My all time favourite is the episode where Bart ends up inside a mental health institution. There he meets Michael Jackson. He is finally released and tells his family and the rest of Springfield that Michael Jackson will be visiting. As Jackson steps from the bus the crowd gasps and cry out "He's white". Turns out Bart's Michael Jackson is a plumber from Michigan.
    Roland Pascoe, Norwich, UK

    The episode which has Side Show Bob and his younger brother Cecil is one of the most intelligent Simpsons episodes ever. Pure hypertextuality! Cecil (voiced by the bloke who plays Niles in Frasier), caught off guard, shouts "Merris?" Brilliant!
    Dan, Murcia, Spain

    Homer's comment to an upset Lisa: "Just because I don't care doesn't mean I dont understand".
    John Wojtczak, Croydon, UK

    When sideshow Bob is up for parole after Bart foils his plots to frame Krusty and the board ask him about the tattoo on his chest which reads "die Bart, die". Sideshow Bob answers that it's German meaning ┐thee Bart, thee┐. The parole board's response? Why no body who speaks German could possibly do anything evil! Genius!
    Sarah Lee, Leeds, England

    A whale of a time - the X-files episode with Moe's comment "who would've thought that a whale would be so heavy"!
    Dave White, Coulsdon, UK

    There is a vision of Homer dying in one episode. In it he falls over and hits his head on the ground and the top of his head falls open. A note falls out of his head onto the floor saying "I O U One brain, signed God". Class.
    Dave, UK

    The Scorpio 'Bond' episide was hilarious with Homer stopping Bond's escape! Most of the Side Show Bob episodes are great too.. I love the scene where Bob has climbed out from under the car and keeps stepping on several rakes!

    br />Jonathan Cassar, London, UK

    When Homer looses his last peanut down the sofa and then finds a fifty dollar bill whilst searching for it: Homer: Fifty dollars? But I wanted a peanut! Homer's brain: Money can be exchanged for goods and services, fifty dollars can buy many peanuts. Homer: Woo Hoo!
    Mark Williamson, Dunfermline

    Burns' 101 Damalatians song... "See my hat, 'twas my cat and my cloak, vampire bat See my coat, ermine stoat, and my loafers, former gophers".
    Simpson Fan, Springfield

    The entire Hank Scorpio episode is a work of genius. "Homer, when you get home there'll be a new storey on your house".
    Dan Gray, York

    The various ads on TV are genius ... the one for the 50s theme restaurant "where it's 1959 every day of the year baby! (actual year may vary, consult calendar for current year...)"

    Marlon Brando as Truckasaurus ... "You crazy car, I don't know whether to eat ya or kiss ya..."
    James Tuff, Ballymena, N Ireland

    "Smithers, release the flying monkeys".
    Pete, Belfast

    I loved it when Homer, trying to justify his lying, said to Marge: "It takes 2 people to lie Marge. 1 to lie and 1 to listen".
    Craig, Lincoln

    Is there a bad Simpsons episode? I can't think of one but certainly my most memorable scene from this dysfunctional family is when Homer persuaded Bart NOT to jump the Springfield Gorge on his skateboard and ended up (inadvertently) jumping himself! I never laughed so much when he fell down that cliff and then couldn't breathe when the ambulance crashed and he went down again! Everytime I see that scene it still reduces me to tears!
    Lee Evans, Wales

    I feel that one of the funniest moments is during the episode where Homer thinks that bart might be gay. He takes him to a Steel mill to meet 'real' American men and they all turn out to be these camp, butch homosexual workers. An absolute classic.
    Paul Schneider, Llantwit Major, Wales

    One of my favourite episodes is Homer Badman, where Homer is accused of sexually assaulting a student. It's rich in comic gems, including the talk show host telling a woman guest who has never met Homer, "Go ahead and cry - your tears say more than real evidence ever could".

    Homer and Marge going out of their house to confront the protestors. "My husband is a decent man," says Marge, just as the wind catches Homer's dressing gown and exposes him to the crowd.

    Homer finally cleared, and his reconciliation with the medium that has caused his downfall: he hugs his TV set after the rest of the family have gone to bed: "Let's never fight again."
    Alan Simpson, Belfast, NI

    Homer offers Lisa a doughnut when she asks if he has any fruit - "This one has purple stuff inside, purple is a fruit."
    Gary Thomson, Kirkcaldy, Fife

    The way that whenever any kind of vehicle crashes into something it always explodes in a gigantic ball of flame - regardless of the type of vehicle or how fast it's travelling. Brilliant!
    Dominic Francis, Manchester, UK

    The episode where Home falls for his coworker Mindy (voiced by Michelle Pfeiffer) Homer: "I got this friend named... Joey Jo-Jo... Junior... Shabadoo. Moe: "That's the worst name I ever heard." (A man runs out, crying) Barney: "Hey, Joey Jo-Jo!"
    Nick Dollings, Brighton

    "De" "Fault". The two greatest words in the English language, from Homer in Space.
    Kevin Barnes, St Albans, UK

    When Santa's little helper runs away and joins Mr. Burns' gang of rotweilers. The dogs are all chasing something away, and Burns goes "where's Crippler?" and this clapped out dog, seriously over weight, wheazing and grey, crawls past. Burns: "Ahh - there he is. I remember when he got his first Hippie".
    Hazel, Durham

    When Bart takes Santa's little helper into school and Mrs Krabapple (?) says "Heh, it thinks it's people". The delivery is perfect!
    Naomi Stocks, London

    Sugar Man! Gee, they doin' that now eh.
    Tugboat, Witney UK

    There are hundreds but... 'Hi, I'm Andre Aggassi'. Homer: 'The wrestler?'
    Liam Evans, Bridgwater

    Thw Greyhound song has already been mentioned... A few of my friends and I often do our own rendition of this song after a few drinks much to other peoples' amusment. There are many many other parts as well. I particularly like the episode where they go to a science museum (knowlegeium) and Bart skate boards on a mock up martian planet. If you look closely Mars is written in the Star Wars font!
    James Lawless, UK, Stoke-on-Trent

    My 2 favourite Homer quotes: A toast: "To Beer; the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems'" and on arriving at a health club to find it's an alcohol-free zone: "Aagh! Beer not function Homer without".
    Mort, Midlands, UK

    The episode where Homer drives Moe's car down the cliff to get the insurance. He dives out the car at the last minute only to roll round in a circle and back into the driver's seat.

    Also when he tries to retrieve his badmouth letter to Burns from the post office. Homer "Hello my name's Burns I believe you have a letter for me". Clerk "What's your first name" Homer "I don't know".
    Jonjo, Edinburgh

    Absolutely ANY episode featuring Sideshow Bob - a pure comic masterpiece.........
    Steve D, Norfolk

    I am not not licking toads.
    Lord Julius, London, UK

    The classic lost in the wilderness episode. Homer sets a trap to show Bart how to "Hunt like a man", only to flip a small rabbit into the distance. Hilarious. Also when Homer dives into a bush to catch the local wildlife and is set upon by numerous squirrels intent on eating him alive. Classic comedy.
    Nick Groves, England

    When Ned Flanders goes nuts. Doc:...Ned Flanders?! - May god have mercy on us all ! Doc (to wife): have you seen my sneakers? Wife: They're in the den. Doc: My sneakers, in the den? May god have mercy on us all.
    Martin, Cheshire

    Family Simpson are watching the TV, Homer "This Tarzan movie is terrible!" Lisa: "Dad! It's a documentary about the homeless!"
    Andy Cox, Coalville UK

    Come now... It's clearly the Flinstones-esque intro that goes: "Simpson / Homer Simpson / He's the greatest guy in his-to-ry / From the town of Springfield / He's about to hit a chestnut tree... D'oh!"
    Stuart Wallace, London

    When Dr Hibbert is explaining to Homer that he has a unique genetic condition which makes his skull one eigth of an inch thicker than normal called 'Homer Simpson Syndrome'. Homer's response is "Ohhh, why me?"
    Dunc, UK

    Star Wars Episode where Homer thinks Mark Hamil tells him "Use the force, Homer" but actually says "NO!!! use the FORKS!!" to escape.
    Ian Brazier, Chelmsford, Essex

    What about when Bart sneaks into a native casino... Manager: If you want to see the future, throw a treasured personal item onto the fire. IBart tosses a small object, which explodes with a bang) Not a firecracker! Bart: Hey, I bought it from a guy on your reservation. Manager: That's Crazy Talk. Bart: No, it's true. Manager: No, I know, that's my brother, Crazy Talk. We're all a little worried about him.
    Chris C, Reading

    The school bus is out of control going down a steep hill - Millhouse says "It's like Speed 2 but with a bus".
    Stu, London, UK

    Police Chief Wiggum and Mayor Quimby arguing in the monorail episode: Wiggum: I got pictures of you, Quimby. Quimby: You don't scare me. That could be anyone's ass.
    Dave, London, UK

    Best Bart writing lines opening "Pork is not a verb."
    Sul, Cardiff

    The episode where Homer repairs the toaster and creates a time machine. The scene where he sneezes and all the dinosaurs keel over is classic "That's gonna cost me...!"
    Barrie, London

    More from the Sideshow Bob parole hearing where the prosecution demands the withdrawal of his description of jail as "a urine soaked hell-hole", to be replaced with "pee-pee soaked heck-hole". A perfect episode.
    Jack Lewis,

    Two great moments always get me going: When Homer has the dream about chocolate world, where everytning is made from chocolate, he is overwhelmed by the sign in a sweet shop window declaring "Chocolate; half price." And the immortal line elsewhere from Homer; "Marge, it takes two to lie; one to lie and one to listen." SUPERB!
    Tim, Somersetshire

    "Homer's Enemy" is my favourite with Frank Grimes in, the moment when Homer chews all of his pencils gets me laughing every time.
    Andrew Robinson, Leicester, England

    In the episode where Marge and Homer are explaining what Lisa's first word was, Krusty The Clown has a promotion during the 1984 Olympics giving away free burgers on each event that the US win a gold medal. However, Krusty's management have rigged the promotion for events in which the Soviet Union are favourites.

    The Soviet Union's subsequent withdrawal for political reasons has meant a US gold medal landslide and is costing Krusty a fortune. Krusty: "You people are animals, I'm going to personally spit in every 50th burger." Homer: 'I like those odds!'
    Another Simpson Fan, Springfield

    I like the episode where they have an arranged marriage and Homer dresses up as the elephant god Ganesh and tries to stop the wedding.
    Richard Sockett, Sheffield, England

    The aliens Kang and Kodos as dopplegangers for Clinton and Dole walking along the street hand in hand. When an aide tells them to stop holding hands, they reply "if you've got a better idea for exchanging long protein strings - I'd like to hear it".
    Gareth, Poole

    When Homer changes his name to Max Power. The whole episode is brilliant but in particular when Max Power's oldest friend Trent Steele says "Great Name" and Homer replies "thanks I got it from a hair dryer" also for the magnificant "you do not snuggle with Max Power you strap in and feel the Gs" speech.
    Cameron Ballinger, Glasgow Scotland

    Love letter. Marge recalls the time Homer sent her a love letter....well it was a postcard from the duff Beer factory. Half was illegible as he was drunk. Started off with "marg u gotta butt that don't quite.......yada yada". Was very funny.
    Sab, uk

    It's got to be the episode where Homer is cooking a spit roast outside. Lisa has turned vegetarian and bumps the spit roast (which happens to be on wheels!) in disgust with the lawn mower. Homer then chases this spit roast through Springfield. It gets totally spoiled but homer keeps shouting "It's still good, it's still good!" Until it goes into the river, blocks the dam and eventually gets shot out under tremendous pressure and guess what? It's still good!
    Richard Smith, London

    On Homer pretending to be Monty Burns to collect a letter. Homer: "I'm Mr.Burns. You have a letter for me." Postman: "Sure do Mr.Burns, what's your first name?" Homer: "I don't know." - Always kills me!
    Barry French, Chelmsford

    Any episode featuring Disco Stu. An underrated comic genius. Plus, he can dance.
    Ian, London, UK

    For me, it's got to be the episode where Bart going to jump the gorge on his skateboard, but Homer ends up on it. "I'm going to make it" shouts Homer, before missing by a mile and falling head over heals down the cliff. Then, just when you think he's OK after being picked up by helicopter and put in the ambulance, it crashes, sending him back down the cliff again. I'm laugh, just picturing it.
    David Hemingway, Leeds

    Classic Simpsons for me is the episode in which Homer, whilst scouring the 'for free' section of his local newspaper discovers someone is giving away a Trampoline. "Tramapoline! Trampopoline!" he mispronounces and runs out of the house to collect it, afraid someone might beat him to it. When he picks up the Trampoline he discovers it belonged to Krusty: "I used to do a lot of tumbling in my act" he explains. When Homer gets the trampoline home it starts off well enough with Rod and Todd Flanders exclaiming "Each leap brings us closer to God" and "Catch me, Lord, catch me!" but soon things go wrong.

    All those who have a go on the seemingly 'cursed' trampoline manage to suffer injuries of some sort or another such as broken arms and legs. Soon the Simpsons back garden is littered with injured neighbourhood kids, Marge soon insists he get rid of it. Later Homer, try as he may can't get rid of the Trampoline - he throws it off a cliff at one point but it bounces back up and lands on him. He's close to madness until Bart shows Homer the only way to get rid of it is to lock it to something with a bike lock. Seconds later it's stolen. Classic.
    Will Bakali, Cambridge, UK

    The Bart shoplifting episode. Marge wants just one family portrait photo taken without Bart ruining it. As she asks this, we are treated to a viewing of the previous attempts, all hung on the stairwell wall, and end on one where Bart is holding a cardboard speechbubble to Homer's mouth with the words 'I Stink'. Homer sees it on the photo and then exclaims - "Hey. I don't remember saying that!". Cracking!!
    Tim, Oundle, Peterborough. England

    These crack me up everytime: Airforce security opening hanger 18 and a little green alien waves a green wand at them, and a soldier shouts "carefull hes got his probe". Why do I laugh so much at that?

    Marge questions a hot dog vendor, asking whether he just follows Homer around and he replies "lady, he's putting my kids through college".

    The ultimate for me is the April Fool episode and the atomic cloud of Duff beer exploding over the house. Chief Wiggam gets out of the patrol car and runs towards the explosion calling for back up he shouts "Pretzels we need pretzels".
    Chris Percy, Hull, UK

    Lisa: "In Chinese, the word for crisis also means opportunity". Homer (patronisingly): "Yes Lisa. Crisatunity." And how about all Homer's "Mmmmmmmm" lines? Mmmmmm sacrelicious; Mmmmmm organised crime; Mmmmmm free goo. And Marge, on seeing Bart running amok after being prescribed "Focusin": "My poor baby! He's whacked out of his gourd!" So many fabulous lines!
    Mathias Disney, London

    When a scared Homer is locked in a mental institute cell with a guy who thinks he is Michael Jackson. "Hi I'm Michael Jackson, from the Jacksons". "Hi I'm Homer Simpson from the Simpsons".
    Simon Thanesan, London, UK

    The episode in which Bart sells his soul to Millhouse. Classic in every way. Spiritual and serious (Bart: 'Lisa, I am familiar with the works of Pablo Neruda'), as well as weirdly hilarious (church congregation fooled into singing Iron Butterfly's In-a-gadda-da-vida).
    Ian, Oxford, UK

    Love the one where Homer et al are watching a stunt-rider about to jump over a pool filled with crocodiles when the announcer says, with suitable gravity, that the jump will be made even harder by the release of a "Lion, king of the jungle" into the pool. Cue release of poor lion floundering about and trying to swim. Made me cry with laughter :)
    Steve Tanner, Geneva, Switzerland

    The episode where the Simpsons go for family therapy and end up giving each other electric shock treatment was utterly hilarious. Great slapstick.
    David Gee, Hampstead, London

    When the lassie from x-files rigs homer up to a lie detector and asks if he understands, homer replies yes and the machine blows up. I was drinking tea at the time and spilled it all over my trousers laughing.
    Ali, Glasgow, Scotland

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