The Lunchtime Bonus Question

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Welcome to the Lunchtime Bonus Question.

The rules are simple. Every day at 1030BST we give you an answer. You then tell us what the question was.

Marks are deducted for predictability, and a selection of your most wrong questions are published each day until about 1500 BST when the actual question is revealed.

FRIDAY

Friday's answer is "AN EIGHT INCH TWIG"

Entries are now closed. Wrong questions included:

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck would chuck wood?
Joel, Philadelphia, PA

The two secrets of John Paul Lederach's peacekeeping success are a ten inch carrot and what?
Phil Welch, London

Complete the great marketing tag line, ... the future's bright the future's ...
Richard, Dublin

After badgering the BBC for months and writing 27 letters to the Director General, what did I finally get in exchange for my Kudos?
Steve Sutton, St. Albans

What was the Zulu WMD?
Lawrie Alsford, Southampton

I bought 2,000 packets of custard creams yesterday. What can I afford to buy with my Clubcard points?
Hildreth, London

What has Robin Gibb just stopped wearing on his head - oh, wait.
Richard Edwards, London

In the Man v Machine contest, what was Basil Fawlty's weapon of choice?
Mahan, Belfast

Following on from the success of Kit Kat Chunky, what have the makers of Twiglets decided to launch?
Lester Mak, London, UK

What does 90% of spam email offer ... no. wait.
Ian Davies, London

What buy-it-yourself item could cause a marmalade revolution if just one elastic band sent it gliding so fast at the wrong person?
Tim G, UK

Headline: "Straw in the Clear!".. What has new research shown was actually responsible for breaking the camel's back?
Baler Twine, Barnstaple North Devon

What is needed to fall on the line to delay rail services?
David, UK

Apart from an elastic band, what also is useful to have when considering joining the Chippendales?
David, UK

According to Leviticus, with what can you have sexual relations and not be put to death?
Phil Rogers, Bournemouth

What's brown and sticky?
Pedro Van Pedro, MK, UK

To make a handy pocket sized catapult you require just one rubber band and...
Pete Clark, Linslade

All wrong. The correct question was what blew on to the lens of a speed camera in Hagley Road, Birmingham, which obscured the view of speeding motorists and helped them escape getting caught.

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THURSDAY

Thursday's answer is "JUST ONE ELASTIC BAND"

Entries are now closed. Wrong questions included:

What's the most essential piece of kit for any bloke auditioning for the Chippendales?
Skippy, E. Sx, England

What was left after the great stationery disaster of 1879?
Rebecca Wicks, London

There once was a man of Japan
Whose limericks never quite scanned
Asked how it was
Replied "Tis' becoz I use_____ ___ _________ ____"
The Jes-ter, Brussels

Lord Archer, how did you manage to fix your Ferrari when its cambelt snapped?
Adrian, Southend-on-Sea, UK

What did it take to get him gliding so fast?
Tim G

What isn't as good as a Cornetto?
Graham, London, UK

When Wile. E. Coyote opens the huge crate marked "ACME High-speed airborne propulsion system", what does he find?
Graham, London

What actually holds the proposed EU Constitution together?
Paul.B, High Wycombe, UK

When America demanded from Greenland a detailed list of their weapons programme. Greenland immediately sent them a list of their military capabilities. What did the list contain?
Mahan, Belfast

What was the title of Albert Hammond's one hit wonder - oh wait
Sara Whitaker, Limassol, Cyprus

What does it take to turn cling film into an unreliable contraceptive?
Frances, Krakow

What, other than Liza Minnelli, is unable to be effectively merchandised?
Kat Wesley, Derby, UK

McGyver was able to stop one nuclear bomb, three atomic bombs, two hydrogen bombs and a bus with?
Mahan, Belfast

What are France donating to the effort to rebuild Iraq?
Chris Ford, Bristol, UK

What does it take to double the value of your 1 million lira bundle?
Nigel, Southampton, UK

Why does the aging rock group keep bouncing back?
Lee Howes, Epsom, Surrey

What does it take to knock out the eye of a Cyclops?
Gary Pentland, London, UK

What does Action Man need to perform a bungee jump?
Parminder, Leeds, UK

All you need to create a marmalade revolution is two oranges and ......
Phil Evans, Keele, UK

Four rubber musicians make...
David Gorton, Oldbury, UK

What is holding the Tory Party together at the moment?
Edward, Guildford

All wrong. The correct question was what powered a model aeroplane which flew for 36 minutes in Leicestershire, setting a new British record. It was twisted 1,800 times.

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WEDNESDAY

Wednesday's answer is "HE WAS GLIDING SO FAST"

Entries are now closed. Wrong questions included:

What did they say when I set a world record for translating the Lord of the Flies into Latin..... oh wait.
Kip, Norwich, UK

When Marge saw Homer from the kitchen window, how did she know Bart had left his skateboard on the doorstep again?
Anon, UK

What did they say about the world record horse castrator.... oh wait.
Jason S, Southampton, UK

Why was Davros tested for the steroid THG?
Kieran Boyle, Oxford

Screen Test Question 103: Why didn't Tom take the corner as quickly as Jerry, once the floor wax bottle was spilt?
Richard Peers, Croydon, England

How did optimists view Icarus's fall to earth?
Chris Ford, Bristol, UK

Sir, as you braked on seeing my radar trap and aquaplaned past me, what would you like me to write on your speeding ticket?
Laurie Kord, Alcester

Why did Paddington Bear's Marmalade Revolution come to a sticky end when he slipped on a piece of buttery toast?
Richard Peers, Croydon

How did they know that Superman was late home for dinner?
Mike, UK

What did they say about the world record gold-plater.... oh wait.
Ian Davies, London

How did the world's worst ventriloquist describe his puppet's rapid descent into depression?
Pedro Van Pedro, MK, UK

Miss Lane, how do you know that the man you saw was Superman and not just some newspaper reporter?
Giles Murchiston, Cambridge

He looked like Network Southeast's new rolling stock...
Claire Taylor, Leicester

What is the Universal Translator from Mandarin Chinese to English description of Anglegrinder Man at work.
Chris Dwyer, Glasgow

All wrong. The correct question was how did one onlooker describe Kirk Jones falling into the Niagara Falls.

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TUESDAY

Tuesday's answer is "MARMALADE REVOLUTION"

Entries are now closed. Wrong questions included:

In protest at eggs and bacon for breakfast on the Atkins Diet, the man from Del Monte has launched what?
Sarah Findlay, Cape Town, South Africa

How do you overthrow a banana republic?
Asmara, London

What was the name of Che Guevara's cat?
Giles Murchiston, Cambridge

What immediately followed the 1997 pickle coup?
Vikas Shah, Manchester, UK

"The People's Flag is a shade of Orange" was the battle hymn of which uprising ?
Dave Williams, Prudhoe

What do you have to search the BBC News website for if you want the following result :- There are no pages about "MARMALADE REVOLUTION" from BBC News .
Martin Smith, Dunstable, England

The exact room required to swing a cat is described as one what?
Alan Durward, Edinburgh, Scotland

Marie Antoinette's comment "No Marmite - let them eat citrus based preserves" was partly responsible for what ?
Dave Williams, Prudhoe

Guest: My mother slept with our Irish priest - Father O'Lution! Jerry Springer: The title of this week's show...
Chris Waiting, Cambridge

After giving one of his hard stares, Paddington Bear decided to combat the popularity of the Atkins diet by starting a what?
Paul Maplesden,

G.C.S.E. History Exam Q7 What event led to William of Orange becoming King of England.
Jeff, UK

We have had the industrial revolution, the information revolution. What's next?
Peter Stagg, Bourne End Bucks

My ginger cat went to sleep in the tumble dryer. What did I rename him when he got out?
Kip, Norwich, UK

What is an anagram of "veto armadillo manure"?
Stuart Harcourt, Gravesend, Kent, UK

'These preserves have all passed their best before'. This is the opening line of which Booker prize nominated book?
Andy Sage, Gillingham, Kent

Ginger Headed people of the world unite, for together we can rule, and fight back against the name calling and jokes, this is our time, our future join me in this...
Andy Sage, Gillingham, Kent

The future's bright, the future's orange, with a ...
Jon, London

EDALAMRAM?
Steve, London

In state school we had Jam roly-poly for desert, in the private sector they have a _________ __________.
Mark, London, UK

There was disappointment today when an uprising led by Paul Weller turned out not to be a 'Jam Uprising', but a '.....'.
Dave Godfrey, Swindon

Militant Conserve-atives are looking forward to what ?
Simon Walke, Whitehall

What did the inventor of the first genetically modified chocolate flavoured oranges quote?: It will be a.....
Angelique, Durham

What variation of 'spin the bottle' can be played to determine whose turn it is to wash up breakfast?
Tim G, UK

What happens is you put a stained breakfast tablecloth on spin-cycle in the washing machine?
Kirk, Guernsey, CI

OK, in the 60s we had the Twist and the Mashed Potato, but can anyone remember doing the....?
James Castle, Welwyn Garden City, UK

What was the original title of the forthcoming Matrix sequel, rumoured to have Paddington Bear cast as "The One" ?
Simon Walke, Basingstoke, UK

All wrong. The correct question was how has the protest of Austrian farmer Johann Thiery been described after he was stopped selling apricot marmalade by EU rules which said it must be made with citrus fruits.

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MONDAY

Today's answer is "BUY-IT-YOURSELF"

Entries are now closed. Wrong questions included:

CAN-I-HAVE-YOUR-PAPER-WHEN-YOU'VE-DONE-WITH-IT?
MTM, Huddersfield, UK

Buy Curious?
Roy Kerley, Belfast, UK

My name is Matt Barrett and I would like to sell you a shiny new Barclaycard.
Tony Cox, London, UK

What should become the standard answer from diners when recommended wine by the staff at London eatery Petrus?
David Winterflood, London, UK

Can you finish off the Victor Kyam Business School motto:- " If you like the company so much ______"
Paul.B, High Wycombe, UK

"What would I do without you, Q?"
Dave Godfrey, Swindon

If you are asked to Bring Your Own Bottle you really should...
Kat Wesley, Derby, UK

If they don't have Hofmeister, can you get me a pint of Stella?
Julia Drake, Leamington

Which 'Lifestyle' programme had to be dropped due to lack of contestants?
Adrian, Southend -on-Sea, UK

Jeffery Archer : "Hey everybody, buy my Prison Diaries!!"
Everyone Else : ______________
Mark, Reading

I've already been bought novelty figures of Gomez and Morticia. What should I do if I also want one of their cousin?
Sarah Findlay, Cape Town, South Africa

When approached by some young neds to purchase fireworks on their behalf, what should your reply be?
Chris Dwyer, Glasgow

If you want something bought properly, what should you do?
Sarah Findlay, Cape Town, South Africa

What was the phrase used, only once, which ended my dreams of a successful marriage.
Michael Mackenzie, Glasgow

Please can I borrow your copy of The Misanthrope?
Giles Murchiston, Cambridge

Judging from the average debt, which craze has replaced DIY?
Phil Evans, Keele, UK

Nobody Bids for your homemade pottery on eBay so to save face you...
Dave Williams, Prudhoe, UK

I want to fly on Concorde but I'm busy this week. What can I do?
Giles Murchiston, Cambridge

What should you do instead of putting purchases on Barclaycard?
Neil Aust, Guildford UK

Isn't that a wonderful diamond ring in the jeweller's shop window?
Alan, London, UK

Single Shoppers?
Stuart Harcourt, Gravesend, Kent, UK

What the public's attitude likely to be towards a request for 44 days' worth of alcohol?
Edward Green, Oxford, UK

All wrong. The correct question was how has B&Q's new superstore in China been described, bearing in mind that most of its customers will still be employing people to do the handiwork.