UK family's Jaffna homecoming

Frances Harrison BBC correspondent in Colombo

The family had mixed fortunes on the state of their former homes

The Balarajah family from the London suburb of Ruislip had an unusual summer holiday this year - three days in a former war zone in northern Sri Lanka.

"After so many years we are going back and it's going to be a surprise for us - I hope it's not going to be a shock," says 53-year-old Athithapillai Balarajah, a Tesco supermarket store manager born and brought up in Jaffna.

He is among the one million Tamils who fled Sri Lanka's civil war two decades ago - some of whom are now returning home for the first time, taking advantage of the current ceasefire to rediscover their past.

With all their relatives having fled Sri Lanka, the Balarajahs simply do not know what to expect in Jaffna.

After so many years, everything looks different Athithapillai Balarajah

As they drive to Mr Balarajah's childhood home, he points out his local kindergarten and the library, then spots a bombed out house that belonged to his uncle.

"We didn't know until now it was destroyed," he says, getting increasingly nervous about the state of his own home.

Childhood friends

Mr Balarajah is lucky - his house is still standing, though covered in bullet marks.

He is greeted by total strangers - victims of the civil war with nowhere else to go.

They welcome the visitors from London and soon there are tears as a neighbour recognises Mr Balarajah and his sister - childhood friends who never dreamed they would see each other again.

There was laughter and tears for the family on their return

"After so many years, everything looks different," says Mr Balarajah as his sister reminisces about the marble floor her grandfather imported from Malaysia and how they used to dry paddy in the courtyard.

Mr Balarajah's wife, Vijayakumari, is not so lucky.

"Oh my God," she says again and again with her hand over her mouth and tears in her eyes.

The house where she grew up is a wreck - the garden she remembered looking after as a child now unrecognisable.

Mr Balarajah says: "I am so emotional, I don't know what to say about it - so much destruction and change. I didn't expect this."

Storeroom treasures

As her parents struggle with their emotions, 15-year-old Sharmili - born in Britain - is struggling to relate to Jaffna.

"It feels just awkward; I've never seen it before and it's just like a stranger's house to me - any old house," she says.

If they brought me from England to Sri Lanka then I wouldn't be able to cope Sharmili Balarajah

There is some consolation.

Mrs Balarajah discovers a storeroom in her sister's house next door full of all the things she packed and left behind before she went to England, never imagining it would be 20 years before she reclaimed them from the dust and cobwebs.

"I am happy - they're still there," she says, laughing with delight.

There's a fridge, a fan, some broken furniture but, most importantly, old photograph albums.

"We've never seen photos of how they looked when they were children, so we still don't know what they looked like," says Sharmili, who insists her mother had tomato cheeks - red and rosy - in her youth.

Then there are hoots of laughter as someone discovers a love letter Mr Balarajah wrote to his wife soon after they were married.

"My dear sweetheart Vijyi," it starts, but Mr Balarajah quickly seizes it before anyone can read any further.

Generation gap

It's some excitement for Sharmili and her 12-year-old brother, Shankar, who have a long list of complaints - the boredom, the heat, the mosquitoes, the bad roads and the lack of good bathrooms - just to mention a few.

The conditions of the houses made the children appreciate the UK

"I suppose I would have been used to this sort of place if I was brought up here," says Sharmili.

"But if they brought me from England to Sri Lanka then I wouldn't be able to cope.

"Even now I don't think I am coping very well," she admits.

Sharmili says now she appreciates the luxuries of her lifestyle in England and how lucky she was not to grow up in Jaffna.

Shankar is just looking forward to the part of the holiday when they leave Sri Lanka and go to Thailand.

Civil war has driven the generations apart and young British Tamils find it hard to see the attraction of a place like Jaffna.

Three days here may not be everyone's idea of a great time but for Mr and Mrs Balarajah, it's been the holiday of a lifetime.