Bullied parents 'scared to go home'

A growing number of parents are at the end of their tether

A Scottish charity is receiving a growing number of calls for help from parents who say they are being bullied and beaten by their own children.

Parentline Scotland (PLS) said some mothers and fathers were terrified to go home because they were being punched, kicked and verbally abused by their offspring.

PLS estimated that about 5% of the calls to its confidential helpline were from parents in distress.

The charity believes many more parents are too ashamed to admit that they are the victims of such domestic violence.

Sue Torrance of PLS said: "Mothers and fathers feel ashamed that they can't control their child and are embarrassed by the way their child behaves.

"They feel that they have failed.

They are afraid and ashamed of what is happening and have a sense of helplessness in not knowing how to handle or change this behaviour

Sue Torrance
Parentline Scotland

"It takes a lot of courage to talk about this kind of abuse and begin to try and address it, but gradually we can give parents the strength."

The charity is receiving two or three calls a week from parents who say they are being bullied or beaten by their own children.

"We are experiencing a significant rise in the number of calls from parents who talk about being at the end of their tether because of the violence and abuse they are suffering at the hands of their own children," said Ms Torrance.

"But we are convinced they are only the tip of the iceberg.

"Some tell us they are frightened to go home because they will be punched and kicked and verbally abused by their child. Others are simply at their wits' end.

'Suffering in silence'

"They are afraid and ashamed of what is happening and have a sense of helplessness in not knowing how to handle or change this behaviour."

Help group Tulip (Together United Living in Peace) has been set up to offer advice to parents on how to cope with violent children.

Chairwoman Ruth Gort said: "This is just the tip of the iceberg.

"There are many more families who are suffering in silence because of this hidden problem.

We are now undertaking a reform of services for children and their families and the issue of children abusing their parents will not be ignored

Scottish Executive spokesman

"What can parents do if their large 12-year-old boy refuses to do something as simple as go to school and dares his parents to make him go?

"This is the very kind of situation that many parents find themselves in, and often on a regular basis."

She claimed that Scotland was lagging behind England and Wales in addressing the problem.

"It is only now that people are beginning to sit up and take notice that this is a problem which needs to be stamped out," she said.

A spokesman for the Scottish Executive said the issue had been recognised in a review of the child protection services last year.

"We are now undertaking a reform of services for children and their families and the issue of children abusing their parents will not be ignored," he said.

"We already support Parentline Scotland, which offers support to adults who may find themselves in this situation."