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Talking Point Strong marriage, strong society? Your reaction <% ballot="203096" ' Check nothing is broken broken = 0 if ballot = "" then broken = 1 end if set vt = Server.Createobject("mps.Vote") openresult = vt.Open("Vote", "sa", "") ' Created object? if IsObject(vt) = TRUE then ' Opened db? if openresult = True AND broken = 0 then ballotresult = vt.SetBallotName(ballot) ' read the vote votetotal=(vt.GetVoteCount(ballot, "yes")+vt.GetVoteCount(ballot, "no")) if votetotal <> 0 then ' there are votes in the database numberyes = vt.GetVoteCount(ballot, "yes") numberno = vt.GetVoteCount(ballot, "no") percentyes = Int((numberyes/votetotal)*100) percentno = 100 - percentyes ' fix graph so funny graph heights dont appear 'if percentyes = 0 then ' percentyes = 1 'end if 'if percentno = 0 then ' percentno = 1 'end if else ' summut went wrong frig it numberyes = 0 numberno = 0 percentyes = 50 percentno = 50 end if end if end if %> Votes so far:
Strong marriage and understanding between husband and wife has profoundly good impact on children. The improved home environment will result in a sound society and reduced crime. Parents should avoid controversial behaviour and follow a give and take attitude for a lasting married life. Home environment is a single most important factor for the well being of the children. A little tolerance and a bit of sacrifice on behalf of parents will result in children being caring when they grow up.
If the government believes that marriage is so valuable, for strengthening interpersonal ties of loyalty and affection, then why doesn't it allow gay and lesbian couples to marry? Does the government want gay and lesbian relationships to be less loyal and loving than heterosexual ones?
We as human beings learn by copying. If we see both parents together and happy, then they will copy that to the next generation.
Marriage is an institution. Institutions work for the betterment of society. People marry out of love and create a happy home when this is the case.
Surely, marriage is the building block of society. Perhaps our problem is one of definition. If we were to include all heterosexual couples living together in a stable relationship in the category 'married' and at the same time frown upon casual sexual relationships, we would go a long way to redressing the situation of anarchy that abounds at present.
What absolute rubbish. Marriage is human's way to justify having children. It is based on unfounded guilt and fear. It is far more important to have strong relationships based on trust etc.
I do not believe government should be used to dictate moral values, or prescribe lifestyle choices. I'd like to see the focus of government change from the soft targets of moral or family values, onto the secular concerns which affect the prosperity and well-being of people on a day-to-day basis.
"Children learn what they live." That's all I have to say in support of strong family/marriage unions.
Only in fairy tales do people marry and never argue. Marriage means learning that once in a while you have to budge a bit for someone else's benefit, and if you want them to budge for you once in a while then you should treat them nicely. What better guidelines could you have for a healthy society?
I wholeheartedly agree with the Relate comment - emphasis needs to be on children, not the structure or format of their parent's relationships with each other and/or other partners. As a divorced man with no children from the marriage, I now have a wonderful 2-year old daughter who is growing up in a large extended family. Her parents are living together in a broadly Christian setting with other children (having married parents). Love, security and consistency for the child seems to me to be far more important than having ''married parents''.
The answer to the question "Do you think children benefit from growing up with parents who are happily married?" has to be "In most cases, yes". 'Happily' is the key. Children benefit from growing up in happy, caring environments regardless of the marital status of the parents. Marriage in itself is not the most important ingredient and whether or not people choose to get married should not be a platform on which bigoted politicians choose to stand in order to attract the media limelight.
I think children on the whole benefit from having two intimate role models in their lives - ie the mother and father, to aid their development. Secondly we are constantly forming relationships in our lives whether it be school friends, business partners or our next door neighbours. The family is the best place to teach our children how to form good sustainable relationships and to show them the value and benefits of interacting with other people. Society depends upon our ability to recognise the intrinsic value of people and our ability to work with each other to our mutual benefit. But ultimately our happiness is dependent upon love within our lives and it is the family that offers the first opportunity to nurture our ability to love by showing what it means to be loved.
A good relationship - healthy, open, and communicative is as important as a positive relationship in marriage. The problem lies in the statement: does marriage on its own strengthen a family and offer a better environment for children. In itself a marriage is not enough but a relationship with the strengthened commitment of marriage I believe is a good thing.
I see this particular issue as trying to get to the root of a growing problem; the issue of children's upbringing, which inevitably has massive influences over future societies. I don't think having a father and a mother who are married will make a single bit of difference in our current society. I am from a very broken, poor family and have become fairly successful in more ways than just work, but that was through educating myself in more than just how to obtain material possessions and status. Educating myself about life itself. The government appears to be trying to find the root cause of our society's problems, but I think they need to bark up another tree. At least they are trying - it is a complex issue.
I think that children raised in homes where they experience their parents in a loving relationship and have exposure to both the male and female perspective have a better chance at growing into balanced adults.
Children need a strong family life, with well-defined parameters; discipline tempered with love.
This is very much dependent on a strong relationship between man and wife. The old adage 'A house divided against itself cannot stand' still holds good. One of the main ingredients to a stable marriage is the ability to communicate and very importantly to listen to what each other has to say.
I understand the government's current point of view in trying to strengthen marriage in the UK. However, having been a child in a marriage that 'stayed together for the children's sake'
I would strongly advise the couples are left to their own decisions and are not pressured to stay together. Children learn to adapt and pick up parents' conflicts easily. There are many other situations that can support a happy childhood - marriage man/woman is one of them. Being a gay British man living abroad, being able to bring a child into a loving happy and safe environment is surely just as good. I would advise that if couples are in an unhappy relationship they should have the option to pursue their own happiness regardless of there being children involved. As I pointed out earlier, children adapt.
There can be no question that children benefit to the utmost from having both parents present and co-operating within the household. The question remains, why does society continue to sacrifice its integrity to reinforce an already profound advantage? God grants us all humble blessings and yet we continue to value only the shallowest. It is a sorely limited carpenter who, when in need, can summon saw and hammer but no rule.
Having been brought up in England, I have seen the changes in attitudes from my grandparents' age right up to the present day. The government is only partly responsible for this situation. It is an individual couple who decides whether to divorce or stay together. When arguments occur, couples need to work together and overcome their disagreements instead of calling it a day! Marriage is not an easy thing and it does need to be worked at, arguments will happen, but it is for the individual to admit that he or she is wrong.
Every study shows that a strong family is good for children. It inculcates in them stronger family values and morals, making them better persons worthy of inheriting the world one day. In the west, especially the US, if you see the amount of violence and juvenile crime and compare that to the orient, you will notice how peaceful the east seems even though they are not as well off as the west. This again goes to show that material wealth does not necessarily mean a strong society.
A strong marriage in the legal sense is not required, however I do think that the right attitude from the parent(s) of a child make a big difference. Pre-marriage advice, better parenting skills, and better marriage counselling are all useful skills. As long as you don't start moralising or pontificating, it should be okay.
Marriage is at the cornerstone of all western social institutions. If the family structure breaks down, the society begins to come apart. I think that you can see it everywhere. Schools are going to pot, because parents aren't there to discipline and encourage their children, etc.
Yes, I believe children deserve to be brought up within a safe and secure family with parents happily married to each other and having their children's best interests as their primary focus while the children are growing up. To be surrounded by happiness and security should be the birthright of each child.
Quite simply, a happy and healthy family produces happy and healthy children. Those children look at the examples their parents set in every way, from relationships to budgeting money to work ethic.
If a child grows up in a house where mum and dad have done well, and have a strong ethic for commitment, both in their marriage and their work, the child will make this his model as well.
It wouldn't take an "Einstein" to work this one out!
Of course! Which kid wouln't feel secure in the confirmation, everyday, that their presence is valued and enjoyed.
When the children of such secure, happy, parents grow up, they are more likely to be: happy, sociable, helpful, placid and confident.
So... the person will turn out to be a better citizen! Consequently:- better citizens make for better nations. Easy!!! Now try it - which's the difficult bit. But by having low expectations in life...you can do it.
Children assimilate everything that surrounds them even though most of the times they don't realise the full meaning of it. That leads them to imitate what they see in their early ages and even as adults that tendency to blend with the environment subsists. If they grow up in a relaxed and happy family environment they will be better adults, more open minded. Not only the marital relation is important, the full family environment is of extreme importance. There is were the child picks up his first notions about living in society, about love and friendship, about helping and caring for one another. That doesn't mean not to fight, make happy faces and act like is everything OK when in fact it is not, it means you should think twice before bringing a new life to the world, be ready to commit, to give much more than you take back. To love unconditionally. It isn't difficult to bring a child to this world, the real trouble is being a parent...not everything comes with an HandBook and a kid is just one of those things...
As an American living in the UK, I can only say that I left the USA because of a drift in family decency, the effect of unwanted children wandering the streets, selling drugs was obvious. Sadly, I am now seeing the same things occur here which I saw 10 years ago in the States.
I strongly support the government intention. Marriage & family is the nucleus of every society. As such, its stability will have a great deal of help toward the improvement of our society. Another piece of information about marriage and the family is that, it is an atmosphere where one looks for comfort, peace and rest. More to that, proper decision cannot be made in an office setting if the home is in crisis. What happened in the home is very powerful in such a way that it tends to influence what an individual does in the office and in the society. As a Christian, I also believed that God was interested in seeing husband and wife live together when He said "It is not good for man to be alone, I will make a helper suitable for him." (Gen.2) To this effect, it is very appropriate and helpful if the government is looking forward to improving marriage and families.
As a primary school teacher in the UK I have seen the effect of marriage break-ups. The children in my charge are always disturbed by the ordeal and often to the point where their character changes.
I don't think the problem is with marriage itself. I think that it's with people's attitudes towards life, and what's important to them. It seems to me that a large number of people value a big house, a nice car, holidays, position in a company, etc. so much more than they do spiritual well-being, happiness, health, etc of themselves and others. I don't belong to any religious group, so when I say spiritual well being, I am not referring to going to church or similar, I am talking about being truly happy from within and helping others to feel the same. Another key to having a strong society, I feel is empathy. Without that people don't try to understand others, and don't think as much about the possible consequences of their actions. There are so many problems in marriage today because people lack empathy. People have to understand that we are all different, and therefore we can't expect another person to act exactly how we do, or how we would like them to. We have to accept it!
hers as they are. Without any of this, and of course there's much more, I think marriage will continue to be unsuccessful for many, and children will not get the guidance and support they need. This of course leading to a weaker society. It does not appear to me that Education in these areas is even though about in the UK.
I am fed up with politicians telling people how they should conduct their relationships. They are hardly a good role model.
Children need love and support from at least one adult. In a marriage where there is violence etc. it may be better for the child to have one parent than two. We cannot generalise. The sad thing is that communities no longer exist in many places to support those in difficulty, be they children or adults. People shut their doors and don't care. This was a part of the selfish legacy of Thatcherism which said that there was no such thing as society. People need support in raising children. Their marital status is however totally irrelevant.
It may be a fact that children of married parents and/or a two-parent family do better on average, but this may be to some extent because their expectations of their parents have been met. If children did not pick up from society that a particular family arrangement was ideal (i.e. two, married parents), then they would not feel inadequate if their own family did not match this ideal. So saying that there is in ideal family arrangement for children becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy in this way.
It does not matter if parents have a piece of paper that says they are married. What matters is the quality of care from the parents, be they married parents, unmarried parents, lone parents, homo or heterosexual parents. Research shows unemployment does more to destroy home life than marital status. So, the Government should get on with running the economy and keep their noses out of people private lives. Oh, and by the way, I'm married with children.
The institute of marriage is sacred. It forms the basic unit of society. The education of a child begins at home. Neither government laws or formal training in school/universities can teach more to a child than parental example. Actions speak more than words. The light that shines the farthest shines the brightest at home. In order to improve society at large we must first get our act together at home. It also means being less selfish lives.
Individual families are the foundation blocks for a society. If the foundation crumbles the,
then the society too crumbles. It is as simple as that !!!
I truly believe it is wrong for a government to force a couple to stay together for the sake of the children. You cannot force a couple to be happy and sooner or later the children will realise that all is not well. When they find out that parents stayed together for there is a great deal of guilt placed upon them for keeping their parents together in loveless marriage. A couple can still be good parents without living in the same household and sometimes better when all conflict is taken away. I think the government should concentrate on the parenting aspect and not the marriage aspect.
Couples today more than ever walk into marriage with the thought that the marriage might not last. Separation and divorce are common and not perceived to be greatly negative anymore. As a result of this change in society people are not prepared to work hard to insure the marriage lasts.
While I believe that a strong marriage can be beneficial for the children involved I don't feel that it is essential for their development. However I think that a strong marriage provides a sense of wellbeing and security for both husband and wife which will inevitably affect the other areas in their lives. A happy and satisfied society is a strong society in my eyes, and a strong marriage/ partnership promote this.
I agree, however, it is important that the family stays together for all the right reasons. Such reasons would not include the norms (and stigma) foisted on families by a censorious society.
Just as strong marriages do help to make a stronger society, weak marriages damage society. People should consider their vows before getting wed and not just treat them as just a formality they need to carry out before the drinking starts.
Makes no difference really. a good relationship is better than a bad marriage. marriage seems a bit archaic these days!
Sure, strong marriages lead to a strong society. But people in really strong marriages
know when to mind their own business and not to interfere with the lives of single or minority citizens.
Yes, strong marriages do reflect a strong society. The current state of marital relations show us just how bankrupt our society has become. As long as we continue to base our society on greed and personal gain at any cost, I see no hope for strong marriages.
Family is the basic unit of a free society. The deterioration of the family is the basic reason for the deterioration of society. Strong marriages and strong marriages are the keys to society's future. Whatever fights against marriage and family surrenders the future of peace and order in society. Whatever strengthens marriage and family provides the most basic, most important building blocks of society.
I have heard of studies showing that the great majority of those in prison are from broken homes. That's is enough evidence for me.
Every family unit is a small part of society as a whole, so of course a culture with a strong commitment to marriage is going to be healthier. Children raised in a broken home enter the world at a disadvantage.
The Bible teaches that marriage is an institution created by God. If we really regarded it as such, and treated it as such, and based our marriages on His commandments, we would have a society which shunned evil and embraced good, the opposite of what we have today. By marriage, I do not mean two people of the same sex!
There are exceptions to every rule - including some single-parent families where the children are doing well, and some two-parent families where they are doing badly. But look around you for the general rule.
There are other factors that contribute to a strong society. Moral fibre, honesty, faith, hope and charity, courage, resolve, propriety, modesty, manners, politeness, deference, consideration and a degree of tolerance.
We can all contribute toward a strong society by showing a little more love for those with whom we share this rich planet.
The values of marriage needs definitely to be worked on through community, education, religion, media without of course criticising the lone or divorced parent but have some kind of help and fraternity. This is a MUST for the following generation as our childhood has an important impact through our adult life and therefore in our society. I think we should definitely take it as a priority matter.
If a strong marriage and strong society do go together, it is because government moralising means that any other lifestyle choice is demonised by the establishment. I have one simple message for the government on this and similar issues ... GET OUT OF PEOPLE'S PRIVATE LIVES!!
The marital status of parents is not an issue. The
way in which they bring up their children is. As long as a child is in a happy, loving environment that is the key. The child's model for what they will do in later life is built on that foundation of experience. What is most important is to help adults understand what is the right environment for a child's all round growth. The marriage bit is just a hook for the government to hang its hat on.
I agree with the government in its proposal to set up a learning infrastructure. I do not believe the government is trying to tell people how to run their lives and prescribing how to do parenting. Support and marriage guidance can produce stronger marriages and a stronger society.
A strong marriage provides the emotional stability that children need when growing up. To deny this is blindly hoping that self-centred decisions of the 'me, me, me' brigade have not produced many of the social problems that have arisen in the last twenty years or so.
It's not strong marriage, but strong family that's important. The government should be encouraging the stable, loving family, in whatever form it takes, as a good environment in which to raise children.
Children who grow up in two-parent families are far less likely to drop out of school, get in trouble with the law, become pregnant as a teenager and suffer from depression. These facts are consistent throughout the industrialized world, differing little from one rich society to another. While some kids who grow up in broken homes do just fine in life, they are at much greater risk from the aforementioned maladies. Recognizing these irrefutable facts does not amount to an attack on unwed mothers or endorsing Mrs.Thatcher's view that they should all be stuffed into convents. But facts are facts. Those who deny facts are either fools or liars. |
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